Chương 241: Jason's Thanks
(Jason's POV)
I collapsed to my knees, holding my head. All the memories flooded back to my head. From my childhood to the moment I used the gun on myself.
"Fuck..." I said as I felt my entire body tremble, "Fuck...."
I felt as Mavis wrapped her arms around me, holding me, "It's okay..." She said soothingly, "It's okay, Jason..."
"I-It's not okay..." He said, "This whole time I've been here.....I always wondered why I didn't remember stuff....I....."
"Shhh..." Mavis whispered to my ear, "Just calm down..."
I couldn't help but feel nothing but anxiety and panic. I finally understand why, why I was feeling those things during my time with Anna and Irene.
I was sexually attracted to older women, Milfs in particular, because of the abuse I suffered. I remember now, every single horrifying detail of the nights when that woman would go to my room. It was because of her that I developed an Oedipal complex and harbored feelings toward my mother, the one that actually treated me right.
I began to shake more, "This can't be...." I said, "I....."
It was disgusting, I felt sick to my stomach. The things I couldn't control, it was because of her. She made me this way, that horrible woman.....
I pulled myself away from Mavis as I stumbled into the water of the river, "D-Don't touch me."
"Jason!" Mavis called out
I began to splash the water on my face, trying to wash something off, something I couldn't control.
"No..." I said as I looked down at the water
My entire face was drenched in water, I looked at the reflection, disgusted by what looked back at me.
I then saw Mavis behind me, she had a worried look on her face.
"Jason.." She said
I closed my eyes, the memories flooding back again. I couldn't control it. I had so many thoughts, emotions, and fucking questions in my mind right now. I didn't know how to deal with this at the moment.
"shit..." I said as I clenched my fists
"Jason, are you okay?" Mavis asked
Besides the abuse, and my sister and mother's deaths, there was one specific memory, one that finally made sense. Why was I so mad at Kagura's miscarriage? I had overreacted so badly that looking back at it, I wondered what the root of that was.
Now, I know. And it was sickening. I didn't want to think about but that's all I thought about.
"No." I said, "I'm not okay."
I stood up and I looked up at the sky, I didn't know what to think anymore. This felt like a nightmare, I didn't even know if this was real or not.
Was this real? Is this a dream? Is this my mind's work? Maybe I'm just lying somewhere, rotting, and this is my mind's way of soothing my pain.
"I need answers..." I said softly, "I need..."
I then felt Mavis's arms wrap around me, hugging me tightly.
"Jason..." She said, "I'm here for you....."
I blinked, "Why?" I asked, "We're strangers to each other..."
Mavis sniffled, "I know..." She said, "But after what I saw...."
"That was none of your business." I said
"It is if you're the one that's responsible for my second chance, Jason!" She exclaimed, "You saved my life and thousands upon thousands in the process. If it weren't for you...."
I sighed, slowly turning around as Mavis released her embrace.
I looked at her, tears were forming in her eyes as she looked up at me. She was taller than I normally thought, that's due to her adult body, being taller than she was when she was a child.
I had to cast aside those thoughts and try to ignore those memories for now. There're a lot of things to worry about in the moment and a lifetime of memories, isn't it. Not yet, that is.
I sighed, "I guess that's a good point." I said, "Thank you, though, Mavis."
She looked at me with a surprised face, "Oh.." She said
I chuckled, "Expecting more resistance from me?" I said patting her cheek, "I'm not gonna argue."
She blushed slightly, "Okay..." She said as she held my hand, "I....wanted to...thank you....for helping me.."
I nodded, "I see." I said, "I guess I should thank you as well."
Mavis smiled, "Yea..." She said, "I suppose that's true."
I looked at her, there was something about her that made my heart beat faster. Maybe this is the result of my fucked up childhood, but for some reason, I couldn't help but be attracted by her. Right now, In this instance, I wanted to kiss her.
"Mavis.." I said
"Y-Yes?" She said while she blushed slightly
Without saying another word, I leaned into her and kissed her on the lips. I felt Mavis jump up a bit in surprise as I held her by the waist while I kissed her.
She then kissed me back as she patted my cheeks. As we kissed, my mind was put to ease, as if the problems those memories brought were just thrown away for the time being.
I then pulled back, "S-Sorry..." I said
I looked at her, she was blushing and her eyes were filled with bliss.
She gave me a smile, "I-It's okay..." She said,
"I haven't felt like this in a long time.."
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