Chương 3: A Father (Part 2)
After leaving his mother's study, Alex headed immediately for the archery range by the stable. It was a nice enough day, so he was worried he might run into some of his family out there. He knew his cousins Julia and Laurent were staying on the grounds at the moment, but neither of them was likely to be around the stables if they didn't have to be. His younger cousin Victoria would have been, she loved the horse she had boarded there, but she was still up in Yorkshire with her mother's family. His aunts and uncles were the likeliest to be about, enjoying the holiday they always seemed to be on whenever they visited the main estate.
Luckily if any of them were out and about, they picked somewhere else on the property to enjoy the weather. The stable hands that noticed him nodded politely as he passed through, and then once he was out on the range, he was alone. He grabbed his equipment from the garden shed that had been converted into his indoor practice space and set himself up by the targets outside.
He started out shooting at a fairly close distance, worried if he started from his usual distance, he would immediately start snapping his bowstrings in anger. He felt himself start to calm down slightly with every arrow he let fly. Once he was confident that he could control himself he started backing up about 10 meters at a time. They started to get more scattered as his mind wandered, and when he started to think back on the conversation that he had with his mother, some even missed the target together.
Alex let out a frustrated sigh and positioned himself at 70 meters. He tried to clear his mind, but it was pretty clear that wasn't going to work. Instead, he thought about what his mother was asking him to do. He thought about the whole mess at the school, how it felt like the administration and families were getting all bent up about absurd things. He thought about how desperate his family was to keep up appearances without having to change anything about the way they lived or thought. He thought about students like Matthew Montoya who were being treated like problems just because they didn't have money or prestigious enough bloodlines. How unfair it was that people like Alex's uncle and mother didn't trust them for no reason. How they were dragging Alex into their game of mistrust and deception.
He envisioned all those things as a spot on his target, a single point that could be ripped apart with a well-placed arrow. He drew back his bow, took aim, and let that arrow fly. It arced through the air and pierced the center of his target.
"Nice shot!"
Alex flinched at the sound of another voice, barely registering what they said. He whipped around in the direction it came from and froze when he saw who it was. Standing by the garden shed, dressed in a crumpled shirt and worn trousers, was his father.
"Dad?" Alex sputtered out. "What are you doing here?"
"Why have you not told me you got so good at that, beta ?"
Alex tried not to be too annoyed that his father was dodging the question. "Do your doctors know you're out here?"
His father rolled his eyes and closed the distance between him. He wasn't using his cane, so he walked slowly and slightly unsteadily, but for him, it was a good showing. "Do not call them doctors," he said. "They are overpaid babysitters. You do not need to inflate their egos."
"I'm pretty sure they have doctorates, dad."
"So does Thomas. He does not need the ego inflation either."
"I'll take it that means no."
"I was lucid enough to notice the good weather, so I decided to take a stroll. I do not see why they would need to be informed about that."
"Yes, you do. You just didn't want to."
"They would have said no."
Alex smiled uneasily. Even though his outfit needed an hour of iron, his father looked better than he usually did. His brown skin wasn't as pale and his eyes were bright and aware. It even looked like he had gone through the trouble of combing his beard and wavy brown hair.
"How long have you been walking?" Alex answered, reaching to take off his chest guard.
"Just as long as it takes to get from my room to here. How long have you been practicing?"
Alex glanced up at the sun, trying to remember where in the sky it had been when he arrived. "An hour, maybe?"
Alex's father leaned in and put a hand up to Alex's forehead. "You feel warm. Care to take a break and join me? Get out of the sun a bit?"
"Sure. But only if you'll let me support you."
" Beta -"
"You need your cane, dad. I know you know that."
Alex's father sighed. "Fine. To make you feel better. Not because I need it."
"Okay, dad."
Alex shed the last of his gear and put it and his bow back in the shed, deciding to collect the arrows on the way back. He then returned to his father and held his arm out for him to take. He did, and even though he said he didn't need it, he leaned on Alex heavily as they walked. The extra support allowed him to walk faster and more steadily. The two kept going down the path that had led to the range, going off in the direction of the small pond on the property. The oak trees that lined the way provided plenty of shade, and once they were underneath their protection Alex realized just how warm he had become.
"Have you spoken to your mother today?" Alex's father asked. His tone was innocent enough, but Alex was immediately suspicious about why he asked that.
"Did you hear something?"
"Was there something to hear?"
Alex narrowed his eyes at his father, who just smiled innocently. Alex sighed and reluctantly recounted his meeting with his mother. "She and Thomas decided to assign me a new flatmate at school this year. A boy named Matthew Montoya."
"That name sounds familiar."
"Have you been hearing about all the changes at the school?"
"Bits and pieces here and there. Out of context, mostly, so I could not understand."
"Last winter, a boy from America named Matthew Montoya took the entrance exam for the school. He's not from one of the old families, so they sent him a rejection of course. But he asked to see his test results, and they couldn't say no. I guess he had felt pretty confident he did well. And, well..."
"He did well?"
"He got a perfect score. I mean, perfect. Not a single point off. Hard to justify not admitting a student who can do that when you're a school that boasts about their academic excellence all time."
"Very hard indeed."
"He felt scorned enough to start publicizing it all. Wasn't long before the story got back here, and almost everyone was jumping on it. Even some of the other elite schools. Anything to make them look good in comparison, right? And people have been accusing Conrad of discriminating for decades, even after they opened up the application requirements ten years ago. And here was finally actual proof that they weren't as inclusive as they claimed. But while people on the outside were clamouring for Conrad to admit Matthew Montoya, most of the families already at the school were demanding they shouldn't. Then by the time they decided to admit the one student, well, he spoke back up in the debate. He pointed out that even if they admitted him, it wouldn't make a difference in the grand scheme of things. How many other students with exemplary applications and test scores had been denied because they didn't have the right connections? How many students at Conrad were only there because their families greased wheels for them? Did graduating from Conrad mean anything if it was apparent you could just buy your way in? Maybe buy your whole way through?"
Alex's father chuckled. "I think this boy has a good point."
"A lot of people did. Too many to ignore. So, on top of extending an acceptance to Matthew Montoya, they also extended acceptances to about a hundred extra students spread across all years. And to further fight the growing perception that the administration was constantly accepting bribes, all those students received fully funded scholarships as well. Most of them wouldn't have been able to afford the tuition without that."
"And so, your mother and uncle want you to board with this boy in case he decides to stir up any more trouble."
"Exactly. They think I can lull him into a false sense of security because I'm so personable." Alex rolled his eyes at that word. "As if I don't have a hard enough time acting normal around people when I don't have ulterior motives. And those stupid ulterior motives are theirs, not mine. Let Matthew Montoya start a second American Revolution for all I care."
"You know you two might be poised to get along fine. If the only thing your mother wants is for you to be nice to him-"
"You think he's not going to find anything strange about a Conrad being assigned his flatmate after he dragged our family's name through the mud?"
"Fair point."
"Besides," Alex continued, "even if we could get along, I wouldn't want to start a relationship with anyone just because my mother told me to. Having to do it with Jack and Hannah was bad enough."
"I thought you and Jonathan were getting on now?"
"Yeah, after almost ten years of him being the biggest pain in my arse on the planet. Sometimes I think it's just because he got more interested in snogging girls than bothering me."
"Hm. And what about you?"
Alex's face went hot. "What do you mean?"
Alex's father chuckled, but this time it faded into a cough. Alex stopped walking out of concern, but his father waved him off. "I am fine," he insisted. "And if you do not want to talk about your girlfriends with me, then that is fine too."
"I don't... I don't have any girlfriends, dad."
"Sure."
"I mean it, dad."
"Boyfriends?"
"No. I'm engaged to Hannah, remember?"
"Does she date?"
"I think so."
"So why not you? If you do not want to, that is fine, of course. But your engagement does not prevent you from enjoying yourself and your time with other people. Our family is not that old-fashioned."
"I just don't see the point of it," Alex said, stopping himself from saying anything further on the subject. Stopped himself from admitting that even if he had taken interest in someone, no one would take interest in him.
"Someday you might," his father said, using his free hand to ruffle Alex's hair. The motion was familiar, something his father had done countless times before. But it was also foreign because Alex couldn't clearly remember how long it had been since he had.
The way his father was acting was not the norm. It hadn't been since Alex was about six-years-old. Utkarsh Joshi was a prophetic wyvern and suffered from an illness known to afflict them. It started slowly, with his visions starting to take a mental toll on him. They would affect his mood slightly, sometimes for the better, but mostly for the worse. Then they started to affect him physically, with headaches and fatigue at first, then fevers and soreness. It wasn't long before one vision would leave him bedridden for a week.
It only escalated from there. He had no control over his visions coming or going. They were leaving him physically ill for longer periods. Sometimes he couldn't distinguish between them and the reality he was living. He would ask people about things that hadn't happened yet. Eventually, he would even attack people in the middle of a vision because in his eyes something horrible was happening. Half the time Alex saw him he would be half sedated, for his protection according to Alex's mother. He knew she was more worried about everyone else though. Because of it, Alex was never sure how much his father even understood when he talked to him. It felt like talking to a comatose patient most of the time.
Alex was a little happy to discover his father had taken in more from their scarce conversations than he had assumed. A little sad, too. That he had been keeping his distance from his father because seeing him was always so hard, and his father was aware enough to have known that. That his father wasn't saying anything about that now. That he probably knew as well as Alex that this moment wouldn't last long, so he was just doing his best to be a good father while he could. That Alex hadn't done nearly enough to be a good son in return.
"Someday," Alex muttered half-heartedly.
The two continued down the path in comfortable silence until they reached the point where it opened up to the small pond. Alex tensed when he saw the small cottage next to it. He had forgotten that was there.
"Ah, that brings back memories," Alex's father said, walking towards the cottage. Alex was worried he might want to go inside, but instead, he stopped by the stone bench across from it and sat down. Alex noticed how relieved he looked to be able to sit down.
"You... you built this, right?" Alex said, sitting down next to him.
"I did. That was so long ago, though. Eighteen years by now, I think."
"You built it for mom."
Alex's father smiled down at him. "I built it for all of us. I thought it might be nice to have a home of our own, where Margaret and I could raise our children. She said it would never be feasible for her to move off the estate like her siblings, so I thought this would be a nice compromise. I think her letting me even build it was the real compromise though."
"She's never even been in there, has she?"
"Only once. When we... Well, our honeymoon."
Alex scrunched his nose and suppressed the urge to gag. "Dad," he complained. "Don't."
Alex's father let out a hearty laugh, but it too devolved into coughing. Alex could tell his father wanted to insist he was fine, but the coughing continued before he could. Alex suddenly noticed how his father was slightly shivering despite it being only about 27 degrees.
"Maybe we should head back," Alex suggested, trying not to sound worried.
Alex's father tamed his coughing after a few more seconds. "I am fine," he insisted again, but his voice sounded markedly less convincing that time. "It is just the pollen, honestly."
"Dad-"
"I need to spend time with you while I can, beta ."
Alex flinched at that, at his father's words and his desperate tone. Before he could say anything to that, a voice called out from behind them.
"Utkarsh! Are you there?"
Alex's father didn't turn at the voice. He just wrapped his arms around himself and hung his head. Alex tried not to let it show much it hurt seeing his father like that. Instead, he turned his head to the voice to see one of his father's caretakers walking down the road, carrying his father's cane. He had a panicked expression on his face, but it relaxed slightly when he spotted Alex and his father beside him. Alex held up a finger to ask him to give them a second.
"If we head back to the house," Alex started, "I'll stay with you. For as long as you want. I'll make masala chai too. I know Laura never gets it right, even though you'll never say it."
"She tries," Alex's father said with a smile. "The English, do not know what to do with tea. All this time to figure it out, and they have hardly gotten anywhere."
"I know."
Alex's father let himself glance back to see his caretaker standing there. He frowned at the cane. "I am not using that thing," he insisted.
"That's okay," Alex said, standing up and outstretching his hand. "I've got you."
Alex's father stared up at Alex with a strange expression for a moment before standing up without taking his hand. Alex worried for a moment if that was the wrong thing to say until his father put his hands on Alex's cheeks and kissed the top of his head.
"I know, beta. Thank you."
Alex felt his throat tighten at the display of affection. Another familiar yet foreign gesture from his father. He cleared it somewhat subtly as his father took him by the arm again and they started walking up the path. The caretaker, the Victor, was wise enough to not offer the cane he had brought. He let Alex and his father walk past him and followed at a distance. As they walked Alex's father asked him questions about his archery, how his cousin's birthday had gone, and why Sean would be staying in Ireland this year. As they walked Alex could feel more and more of his father's weight on his arm. By the time they reached the house, he could tell his father was exerting a lot of effort to not completely collapse. When they reached his room, he tried not to show how eager he was to get in his bed.
"I'll go make the tea," Alex said once his father was seated. "And I'll bring it right back."
His father nodded weakly as Victor started to help him get changed. Alex had a feeling that by the time he made the tea and came back, his father would already be asleep. Victor glanced at him in a way that said, "You should probably just take off."
Alex tried not to acknowledge the look, walking out of the room and heading straight for the kitchen. Maybe his father wouldn't be able to have a cup of tea with him, but his waking up to find a cold cup of tea by his bedside meant something too.
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