Chương 31: End Goal
"So," Pansy took a sip of Firewhiskey, "Are you and Draco finally a thing?"
Hermione blushed.
"That good as gives me my answer." Pansy smirked. "And the chain around your neck."
Hermione reached her arm up to touch it, subconsciously. "Because I've never worn it?"
"No, because it's gold, and Draco has a huge thing for symbolism. The gold obviously is for the fact that you're a Gryffindor, the moon is probably what you mean to him, and the choker-style chain is to amplify the elegance of the whole thing, because that's what you are."
Hermione cocked her head towards the other girl, interest growing. "He likes symbolism?"
"Yeah. For him, everything has to have a meaning, otherwise it has none. There's no such thing as 'something fun' for him. It has to tell you something, otherwise it's useless." Hermione sipped her wine, a smile growing on her lips.
.
"Good to know. Thanks."
Pansy raised a brow at the other girl's expression, but tossed the thought away as soon as Astoria returned from her flat, bottles of PepperUp in hand. Despite Pansy's affection for alcohol, she never actually brewed the potion on her own, and thus was always relying on Astoria to (begrudgingly) supply her with it.
Alcohol. It was a good friend, at times- but other times, it was an enemy, coaxing you to drink more even though it wasn't good in excessive amounts.
Pansy smiled, Theo's voice echoing through her mind, concern and sweetness clearly audible. It wasn't that he treated her like a princess- she wasn't one, and didn't want to be treated as though she couldn't take care of herself- but she appreciated his concern and care, especially when she had never had that feeling before, aside from Astoria and now Hermione. Even the other Slytherin girls in their year she had been acquaintances with- Millicent, Tracey Davis- it had really only been for show, just to show they were 'friends'.
In Slytherin house, you were either friends for life, or you pretended you were. It was harsh, but that was how it worked. You either stuck together and banded against the world- or you pretended to, and either ignored them or betrayed them sometime in their lives.
Even her parents hadn't really loved her- she had just been a way for them to associate with another wealthy family, climb the social ladder.
But Theo- Theo knew exactly how she felt, considering he, too, had been raised in the same, strict, pureblood society she knew so well. He understood her struggle to constantly improve, her struggle to always defy the expectations and meet them at the same time. He knew what it was like to live that double life, walk the line with knives on one side and a chasm on the other.
Draco and Blaise might have been in Slytherin, but her connection with them had always been... was a good word for it. She had had amorous relationships with both of them, at some point or another in her Hogwarts years, but it had never really clicked.
She reached up subconsciously to touch the diamond pendant swinging from a chain around her throat, smiling at the memory of when Theo had given it to her. It had been, actually, after they'd gone on a few dates, the day after an evening that had gone wrong- she had seen a picture of Ikar in a magazine she'd purchased earlier that day and had promptly headed out to get wasted, coincidentally at a bar near the restaurant where Theo worked.
She had been stumbling home- she only vaguely remembered this, and Theo was the one who had told her- when Theo was leaving work, and he had picked her up and walked her home, considering that it would have been dangerous to Apparate. The magazine was still open, and she had seen it and started to wail, so loudly that neighbours had come knocking. Theo had sent them off and comforted her all night, and come morning she had awoken to a terrible headache and Theo's arms around her. They had talked all morning, about her alcohol abuse- - and later that day had Apparated her to Hawaii, where he had given it to her.
She hadn't quite given up drinking- obviously, as she was sitting here drinking a Firewhiskey- but she had stopped using it as a coping mechanism, and Theo was considerably delighted. In fact, when she had told him, he had been so elated that he had tangled his hands in her hair and kissed her full on the lips, and immediately she knew. It had clicked.
"Pans? Pans!" Hermione snapped her fingers in front of the brunette's face. She had a sort of glazed look in her eyes, a dreamy expression on her face. Astoria raised an eyebrow. Pansy blushed, realizing she'd spaced out for a while.
"Were you thinking about Theo?" Hermione's tone demanded an answer, and her hands-on-hips stance only enforced that.
"I- yes." She blushed, but Hermione grinned. "You had such a dreamy look on your face."
"Did I?" Pansy's hands flew to her face, embarrassed. Hermione smiled. "It's fine. You deserve your day off every once in a while. No one's judging you, Pans."
"You two are honestly one of the most adorable couples." Astoria clasped her hands. "Now, does anyone else want cake, or can I eat the whole thing?"
Pansy scowled. "No way are you eating it all." Astoria grinned. "Better get some then, before I do!" She sang jauntily as Pansy hopped off the counter.
Hermione grinned.
***
"What do you want to make of your life? What.. what end goal do you have your sights set on?" The three girls were in various places around Pansy's apartment, Hermione opting for the large armchair that she lay across, Astoria on the couch, and Pansy on a Transfigured table, all three lounging easily and chatting.
"I mean, I don't really want to stay working as a PA forever, this was just sort of a way to help bolster my income before I did what I really want to do." Hermione pondered. "But I still haven't figured that out. What about you?"
Astoria grinned. "This is my dream, honestly. Working as a CEO, I've made it to the top and now I know that this is exactly what I wanted to be and how I wanted it to work out. Now, if you're talking about my non-existent love life, no, it's not quite how I want it, but, what do you do."
Pansy raised a brow, but didn't comment. "I've always wanted to go into fashion- but you know that. I just don't think I can make it." Astoria scoffed.
"I beg to differ. I saw some of your sketches, Pans, and they're revolutionary. I loved it. If anyone's going to cause a ruckus in the design industry it's going to be you."
Pansy blushed. "What about you, Hermione? Do you have maybe an idea of what you want to do?"
"I mean, I've always been a huge advocate for underrepresented groups; maybe I'll do something like that, you know? Start an organization to give them a voice." Pansy smiled. "If there's someone who people will listen to it'll be you. From other people, that might not be taken seriously, but from you people will listen. And more importantly, they'll remember." Hermione's lips split into a smile.
"Thank you."
***
"I love this! How could you ever consider not pursuing this?" Hermione's voice was all astonishment as she took in Pansy's sketches that she had filled a dozen notebooks with. The design in question was a beautiful ivory dress, with thin straps that criss crossed the shoulder blades and ran down the length of the back, leaving it open. The front was breathtaking; silky material that fell to the floor, not quite as tight as a sheath gown but still close-cut, and with a sweetheart neckline and beautiful embroidery studded with pearls that ran the length of it. The dress even had a small train, and some might consider it to be a wedding dress.
"I dunno. It just feels so harsh, starting from the very bottom after you've already hit the ocean floor and I didn't feel like pursuing it after school. I wanted something a little more relaxing, you know? So I just did something easier, something where I made few decisions." She shrugged. "Being a secretary is easy. You needn't make many decisions."
"Agreed." Astoria nodded. Hermione glanced at Pansy. "I think- I think you should go into this. You can totally do it."
"D'you think so?"
"You have to put more faith in yourself than you do. Of course you can."
***
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