Chương 18: Last Resort
"I just don't get it. It's not that I don't to like him, it's that I don't get it."
Pansy and Astoria nodded. Astoria smiled. "I kind of understand where you're coming from. When I realized that I wasn't attracted to guys, I wasn't closed to the idea, I just didn't get how that could've happened with my incredibly strict upbringing." Hermione nodded, grateful for the fact that someone else understood. Pansy smiled. "And you guys have pretty much each other for all of your childhood."
"I know! That's why it confuses me. The fact that I disliked him for so long, and then now it's like 'more than friends'."
"Gotcha."
"And now- like, what am I supposed to do? Whenever I've figured out my feelings for someone, I can't be around them! I get flustered, noticeably, and I stammer a lot, I can't focus when they're in close proximity..." She trailed off, realizing how she was to go and work for Malfoy.
"As hard as it sounds, just try to act normal. Don't become distant; that's only going to make it worse. You like him; driving him away isn't going to accomplish anything. Another thing is to do is to, you know, be a little more flirtatious, open, stuff like that. You are a free agent, do as you want!" Hermione sighed, eyes closing in bliss as she truly processed that, the first time she really had stopped to think about it since she had broken up with Ron- it really had been a whirlwind couple of weeks.
.
"I think I can manage that. But I'll need a little help." Pansy and Astoria looked at one another, having had years of practice seducing various Slytherins (before Astoria realized she wasn't into men) and smirked.
"That won't be a problem."
***
The next work day, Hermione remembered Pansy's advice and pulled a sleek, tight, red dress from her closet that Pansy had persuaded her to buy. It hugged all her curves, and exposed part of her collarbone, and paired it with a pair of similarly coloured heels. She let her hair cascade down her back in its natural soft waves, and applied a light pink lipstick. She highlighted her cheekbones, and used a pale pink eyeshadow to accentuate her bright caramel orbs.
Running Pansy and Astoria's tips and tricks over in her mind one last time, she spun on her heel, turning into darkness.
***
Draco sat at his desk, waiting for Hermione to arrive. This wasn't abnormal; he often arrived early, Hermione being the second person to come into the office. He heard the of the elevator; by now he was well accustomed to calming his heart rate down whenever he heard that sound.
She walked into her office, separate from his own, but he still managed to catch a glimpse- a flash of red, really- through the tall glass windows in front of her desk. He was interested, but he managed to hold off his curiosity until he had to drop off some documents that she needed to sign.
She was wearing something he had never imagined her wearing; a gorgeous, fitted dress that complemented her creamy skin perfectly. Her eyes were only accentuated by the makeup she wore, and made it seem as though they were even larger and brighter than they usually were. Tightening his tie, he handed the documents to her.
"Could you sign these? They need to be reviewed before we finalize the contract with Danete; and then I think I sent you an email with the finalized version of the contract with Jansen. I need you to file that away so that we know we have a copy."
"Of course, Mister Malfoy." She replied in her sweet, sweet voice, while looking up at him through her thick, elongated lashes. She let slip a small smile onto her lips before she took the documents, letting her fingers just brush his. She shivered from the minimal contact, before retracting her arm, documents in hand. She smiled again. "Thank you, Mister Malfoy. I'll have these done as soon as possible."
***
I sit at a table and consider my last resort: writing a letter. It's not really something I want to do, but this really is the last thing I can do before I give up completely.
Gripping the quill between my fingers, I begin to pen my letter.
I don't have visions of grandeur for this; but maybe- just maybe- something good can come of this.
Rolling it up, I send it off, hoping for the best but honestly not expecting a thing.
***
I smile to myself, immensely happy that I've finally got my life on track; my shit together. I've got a new job, gotten rid of the in my life, a new love interest, great friends, good, decent people who don't turn on me in the blink of an eye. I'm also on top of paperwork, and I'm just finishing up reviewing all the contracts that Malfoy has asked me to review when an owl comes in; I don't recognize it, so it must be a ministry owl.
It deposits a letter on my desk, and perches itself on the windowsill, waiting for a reply. I unravel a letter to reveal a name I never want to see, ever again; it's signed Ron.
It reads:
I sigh. Reaching out for the quill I keep on my desk, I pen my reply, hoping it'll be enough to keep him away from me.
Finishing with the flourish that is my signature, I test for tracking spells on the owl (there aren't any) before tying my reply to its leg and sending it off, watching until it becomes a speck on the horizon.
***
The owl I'd sent returns faster than I expected, a roll of parchment attached to its leg and I throw open the window in happiness.
That happiness is crushed as I read the letter, my eyes reading it three times over before the meaning of it sinks in:
She doesn't want to see me anymore. Ever.
Even as friends.
I've ruined everything.
I hastily write a reply, begging.
I don't bother signing it; she'll know who it's from. The owl has waited, perched on the edge of my desk, and hoots at me, wide brown eyes staring at me, reminding me of Hermione's, before it flies off.
***
Not even ten minutes later, the surely- exhausted Ministry owl returns, bearing another letter, probably from Ronald.
I groan and put my head in my hands. The one thing that I want the most in the world right now is peace and stability, and it seems that I can't get that either.
***
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