"Hear ye, hear ye." A silver utensil was tapped on a glass goblet's surface repetitively, and the sound that reverberated inside the room gradually appeased the loud commotion.
"This is your Captain Cesaire speaking." Alya introduced herself with a grin, then contentedly placed the items on the table. "We have gathered here today to celebrate, and to congratulate every one of you for all the efforts and dedications that you've done on this fleet, that despite those tragic years of patience and frustrations, we can safely assume that our sacrifices were paid off. That everything was worth the wait because our vessel, the S.S. Adrinette, has finally sailed!"
The audience responded with a collective cheer, high pitched whistles, and an uninviting grunt. The brunette coughed in silence.
"Like any other newly emerged ships, the S.S. Adrinette doesn't have a base yet. It doesn't have a mission either, or any plans to explore other territories. It is a vessel that sails in no direction. Being one of its loyal crew members as well as the pioneer of this fleet, it is my life mission to set our beloved ship to still waters, averting it from horrendous storms and icebergs that might destroy and sink it like the infamous Titanic."
"I don't want Marinette and Adrien end up like Rose and Jack." their pixie blonde classmate sniffled. "I don't want their love story to become a tragedy."
Juleka patted her head for comfort.
"You've heard Ensign Lavillant, mates. The time has come for the tides to be turned." Alya pumped her fist in the air. "We pledged to the flagship of S.S Adrinette that we will protect their purity for the world, by hook or by crook, that's why we declared this operation as SOS - also known as operation Save our Sanity!"
Thunderous claps roared with enthusiasm.
"Admiral Lahiffe, the floor is yours."
Nino stepped forward, adjusted his cap then spoke. "Years ago, a certain species named Adrien Agreste came to our world brimming with confidence and sunshine smiles. His sainthood was misunderstood by many at first, and one of them goes by the name of Marinette Dupain-Cheng, who bashfully threw some spitballs of fire to the poor boy. But alas! The table was turned the next day when she became a stuttering mess in his presence. And that's how the Agreste Curse was born."
"Little did he know that the lady he infected with his graces transmitted him a poison, a mysterious agent acquired by 85% of Françoise Dupont's male population, including yours truly - until I met my antidote," he said while reaching Alya's hand and kissed it. She batted her lashes dramatically. "A poison that underwent dormancy due to the boy's oblivious nature, and his obsessive crush towards Ladybug muddled his insights about infatuation and love. It was all first for him so he was simply confused. "
"It took years, years mates, for the poison to be triggered. Unfortunately, it was all too late - the poison already infused into his bloodstream and destroyed his immune system without knowing it. Thus Adrien Agreste, our sunshine child, was diagnosed with a terminal stage of Marinette's Charms."
"More like Marinette's Syndrome." Kim snorts earned an elbow jab from Alix.
"Before we proceed to our agenda, I'm giving the honors to Lieutenant Kante on cascading our proceeds."
"Greetings, my fellow shipmates." Max began. "As of 15:25 we have eight open betting pools for post-reveal Adrinette, which obviously nullified all pre-reveal pools such as 'Adrinette will never, ever, gonna be together' that garnered €200 over €950 stakes, and 'Chlorien is a canon' that garnered €10 over €500."
"Sounds like a detergent." Nino snickers earned him a kick in the shin.
Their bespectacled classmate went on. "However, all bets related to the canonization of Adrinette are placed on hold due to some undisclosed information, and the fact that the two confirmed that they aren't dating yet. Everything will probably be validated in an indefinite time frame."
"I have my full respects on Adrien for being a gentleman," Ivan commented while wrapping his arms around Mylene then asked. "How much is the overall money pot, Lieutenant?"
All eyes popped widely with slacked jaws when they saw the amount on the paper stuck on the wall.
"I can't believe I'm here," Chloe grumbled. "Listening to these peasants as they sell my Adrikins' soul to the devil."
"Excuse me; the devil you're referring to is my best friend." Alya crossed her arms. "And for your information, everyone here agrees that Marinette is nothing like a devil, except you who creates Akuma like it's your lifetime job.
The mayor's daughter was about to launch herself from the chair if not for Sabrina. "Why you..."
"While Chlorinette sounds like you're doing a laundry." their capped classmate mused. "Chlolya sounds like an intestinal disease."
Two female heads lashed simultaneously. "Ni - NO!"
"I knew it." Nathanael sighed exasperatedly. "This plan will never be going to work."
"SHUT UP, ASPIRANT!" the girls chorused.
The boy changed from sickly white to tomato red. Did they just insult him with a pun?
"You're going to have your own ship someday, mate." Kim consoled him. "Don't worry."
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While in the midst of a heated debate whether Mont St. Michel should be part of Brittany or not, Alya's phone rang. It was Marinette.
The brunette hushed her classmates before answering the call.
"Hello, Mari?"
"Don't you 'Hello, Mari' me, Alya." her best friend growled on the other line. "Where the foutre did you all go?! You left us here to do all the community works that should be done by the whole class!"
"And here I thought you like doing community service." Alya feigned an innocent tone. "If you're working, then why are you calling me? Oh my gosh, don't tell me you and Adrien are playing hooky?"
"Don't you dare change the subject!"
"My, my. Am I getting on your nerves girl?"
There was a pregnant pause.
"That's it. We're going back to the hotel."
This made Alya's face grew pale. "Oh no, no, no, NO! Don't! Marinette!"
She could see the sly grin forming on her best friend's face. "Oh? And why not?"
"Because...because..."
Nino saw her distress, and after he understood her frantic hand signals, he dialed Adrien's number.
He immediately picked it up.
"Salut, Nino. I'm surprised you called me." was his best friend's obviously faked greetings.
"Dude, where are you? Still at the beach, or on your way back to the hotel?"
"Hmm, I don't know. Why don't you tell me?" his voice was laced with sarcasm. "You're in the hotel, right?"
"Bu - bu - but you shouldn't be here! Not yet!" the DJ sputtered, especially when he saw his frenzied girlfriend. "You must stop Marinette from coming here!"
"Dude, you know Marinette. She's a force to be reckoned with."
"Please don't let her go here. I'm begging you!" he pleaded.
Adrien's calm demeanor was simply a facade for those who didn't know the guy well, but as his best friend for years he knew that behind those words was a seething anger.
"I'm sorry Nino, but I'm not a type of a Knight who can defile my Princess' orders. Besides, I am fully supporting her decisions." the model chuckled. "Get ready to be Marirekt."
He groaned. "That was bad, dude. Horrible."
"It's payback time, Nino. Au revoir~"
"NO! No, no, no, no, Adrien! Don't you dare hang up on me!"
"Try me."
"Listen to me, dude. LISTEN! You must stop Marinette from coming here! By all means!"
He could see Adrien's cunning smile grew. "And why is that?"
"Because...because..." he trailed off. "Because we'replanningyourfirstdatewithMarinettetodaytosettlethebets!"
"...wait, what?!"
Alya smacked his head.
"OW!"
"You dingus! Why did you tell him?!" his girlfriend hissed.
"I panicked!"
"Hey Mari!" the boy hollered on the other line. "Guess what, Nino said that - "
The brunette immediately grabbed his phone. "Spill it, Agreste. Spill it and your intestines will follow."
Her death threat earned her a choke and an audible gulp.
They could hear Marinette's infuriated ramblings in the background, likely because Alya placed her on a brief hold, while Adrien was telling her to let him handle the negotiations.
Surprisingly, she was pacified.
"Okay, I'll bite. What am I going to do then?" he asked them.
"Did you place this in a speaker mode?"
"Uh, no?"
"Good." Alya took a deep breath. "Don't you ever, ever, let Marinette go here until I say so, okay? Don't ask me 'why not' or 'how long' - just don't make her go back here in the hotel. Not now."
"She'll skin you alive, you know," Adrien confessed. "Actually, she's planning it right now. And how she can barbecue you both in a campfire."
The couple shivered at the thought. "Let's just skip the morbid details. We have to settle these things up first before we deal the consequences."
"Let me remind you that Marinette has a mind of her own, and I'm not a kind of person who would force her to do things without her consent."
"That's why you're too good for this world." Alya smiled then went serious. "We need your assistance, Sunny Boy. Distract her from all we care. Use your incorrigible puns. She loves it."
"She admits that?"
The brunette rolled her eyes while her boyfriend blanched. "Of course, dude. I'm her best friend. I know all of her secrets."
Adrien laughed.
"Try to ask some things you don't know about her. Personal things." she went on. "Emma, for example, her favorite romance book by Bronte, that same author who also wrote Wuthering Heights. Or about Hugo, an iconic French writer of the Romantic Movement. Or you can discuss Louis. You know the Sun King?"
"Why do I have a feeling that you just gave me some sort of a code to launch a nuclear bomb?"
"Because that's the way it should be," she stated matter-of-factly.
"Fine." he sighed. "Let's say I agreed, then what is it for me?"
Alya and Nino looked at each other with a shit-eating grin.
"You'll earn a date."
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As they contemplated between red and pink - and yellow, Chloe suggested, because why not? - for Marinette's dress, Sabrina began to ponder.
"What do you think those two are doing right now?"
"Probably trapped in their own world again." Chloe grimaced while clipping her nails.
"I can imagine them chasing each other along the beach shores, with a sunset view on the side." Rose sighed dreamily. "Marinette laughing at her heart's content then Adrien runs behind her with loving stares."
"Knowing Marinette, she will trip and faceplant herself on the sand," Alya muttered.
"Knowing Adrien, he will rush towards her then faceplant himself in the process," Nino added.
"Then they will laugh and look at each other with stars in their eyes."
"Then Adrien will wipe the sand off from Marinette's face with a caress."
"Then someone will have a bleeding nose, and the other will kiss the boo-boo away."
"Oh my God, what did we do to deserve such disgusting best friends?" the DJ groaned as he clutched his head. "I can see it all happening, Captain! Oh no, my...my eyes...I can't take their sickeningly sweet gestures! My head, ouch, my head! And my teeth, they're starting to all rot down because of constant toothaches!"
His theatrics earned a deadpan stare. "Aww, you poor salty person. Why don't you take your insulin?"
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An hour later, the only idea that they've got was an 'Outdoor Date'.
I knew it." Nathanael grumbled. "This plan will never be going to work."
"This is the dumbest meeting I have ever attended." Chloe miffed. "Aren't we all pointing out the obvious?"
"Why don't you take a chill pill and buzz off, Matelot?" Alix smirked, much to the blondie disgruntlement.
"Why am I a Matelot while you're a Major?!"
"Do you want to be a Peintre de la Marine instead?"
"That should be Tomato Head's rank instead!"
"Hey!" Nathanael scowled.
"Kids, kids." Alya cut them. "Can we just set aside our pride for a moment and focus on our current dilemma instead?"
"She's somewhat correct, Captain." Max interfered. "We still don't have any concrete idea about the 'what' and the 'where'. Not that we're all amateurs to the dating scenes."
"Maybe because we're all used to have our class rep do the brainstorming," Juleka commented.
Mylene nodded. "Marinette can come up with something out of nothing."
The entire class sighed.
"So...what shall we do then?" Rose asked meekly. "Asking Marinette about her plans for her first date defeats the purpose, right?"
Silence fell in the room for a moment until Kim broke it.
"If I were in Adrien's shoes." he sighed dreamily while looking at the view outside the window. "I will bring my girl to the most romantic spot in Normandy. I will rent a vehicle and drive her all the way from here to our destination while passing some astonishing sights. I will let her enjoy how the sky turned from indigo to black, with stars and the moon shining through the sea. That way, she will never forget the beauty outside Paris and at the same time, she will never forget the person who bequeathed her such happiness...why are you all giving me that look?!"
"Mates." Alya began. "Let's all give Ensign Le Chien a big round of hugs!"
"Wa - wa -wa - wa - wait a damn mi - ACK!"
Everyone was too excited and thrilled to crush Kim that they missed out the most important factor...
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...only to remember it after they revealed the plans to Adrien.
"We forgot we have curfews." Nino groaned while the other boys face-palmed.
"I told you." Nathanael nudged them for the umpteenth time. "This plan will never be going to work."
A school memo was circulated among the hotel staffs stating that all students will never be allowed to leave the building - even if their surnames are Bourgeoisie - after nine. Those who are caught or failed to return before the said time will be suspended - which is bad considering that they were all graduating students.
"Mont St. Michel is approximately two hours away from Caen. If Marinette and Adrien will leave here after dinner, they can still watch the Poetic Night but they'll never make it here before curfew," said Max. "If before dinner, we will need to have the best alibi why they missed the headcount. Unless..."
"Dude, do you have a driver's license?" Nino asked.
Adrien flashed his Cheshire grin. "I thought you will never ask."
All eyes looked at Max but he shook his head.
"Didn't I tell you this will – "
"Try to finish that sentence again, Nath, and we'll shove you out from the balcony," Kim growled.
Nathanael decided to shut his mouth.
"Curfew aside, how can we make Marinette and Adrien leave this place without being caught?" Ivan asked.
"As if you didn't know these two." the DJ bemused. "They have notorious attendance issues ever since collège, with unexplained disappearances like this dude who has a bodyguard that nabs him every time there's an Akuma – even if it was located two arrondissements away."
"I think I have an idea." the model declared with his mischievous green orbs. "I know someone who can help us."
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Later that night, while the boys were waiting in their room – except Adrien who had left them half an hour ago - Nino's phone popped a notification sound.
Alya: Is Adrien ok?
Nino: Left us God knows where. Maybe calling reinforcements for an inside job?
How's Marinette?
Alya: Sunny Boy will probably die once he sees my child.
Few minutes after Nino sent a text message to his best friend, Alya sent him an attachment.
Alya: Damn, your boy really upped his game!
Guess who's Adrien's wingman?
It was a picture of Chat Noir.