Chương 39: 38: Answers not to Forget
Fates POV,
My consciousness still imbibing to make me aware of what I'm seeing now is real. My boss the person I know for a year now is in front of my parent's graves, especially my mother's. The way she is looking at mom's gravestone only means. sorrow. But why?
those who said don't trust a stranger may be right cause you never know what they are hiding in low.
When she finished, glanced at me "Let's go"
Okay?
'So your gonna follow her ?'
Do you have any other plans? No answer
Great so we are following her
"Where are we going ?" I asked putting on my seatbelt
"For eating something I didn't get enough time in the morning to eat "
"Oh"
We drive off in silence. Should I ask her what she's doing here? no, not now. A few minutes of driving, we found a sidewalk cafe. Getting out of the car I'm still thinking should I leave or not.
"Fate here." Miss Cane calls my name when she finds a seat for both of us. No way of turning back now. sighing heavily I proceed to walk towards her
Wating is something that I'm used to. But right now I'm losing it. I wonder if Miss Cane knows my mom cause. the way her teary eyes were staring at her remarks. Does she know something?
Peeking at her again I continue deluding myself into playing something on my phone. while she eat . she did request me to join her. I politely say no. I am not hungry my hunger eventually feeds upon the questions I have in my mind. I don't even know where should I start. 'Relax Fate. Have patience '. yeah, this will be the fifth time I'm saying this to myself.
**Ring** The ringing of my cell phone halt my sight It wasn't Miss Lee who was calling. Excusing myself I leave outside
I answer the call but before I could say anything the other person begin her interrogation "Fate? are You okay? Where are you? when are coming back? Are you in trouble?" She waited for my response with bated breath
"I am okay " I assure her
No answer. An entire pause invaded between us. I could even sense her tension. She is worried. Regrating perhaps, that's what she always does. Everyone thinks Jennie Hang Kim is the image of quintessence but there is a reality The Idol that everyone worships is quiet and doesn't know how to put her words together sometimes. Does she do this with her boyfriend too? Just the thought of her doing the same thing with her boyfriend makes me disgust
"If you don't have anything to say just go back " I advised, afterall she have a better option. It's not like she going to accept her mistake and take the blame. She would rather throw it on someone else
" I can't " she mumbled.
"Why?"
"Cause I want y...
Huh?
" Hello?Miss Kim?" Did she just hang up on me? I look at my cell phone
Battery dead.
Oh, so I hang up on her.
Dang, it! It's not like I did it on purpose. I have an important thing to take care of first
I go back to Find Miss Lee with some pepars "sorry about that " apologising I settled down
"it's fine " grabbing some documents she handed them out to me "Here" in confusion I took the pepars It was land plot documents and flipping through them thoroughly I found neat handwriting 'Faith Stone Adierson'
"Where did you get it?!" I inquire gazing at her
"Your mother..." Sighing heavily " wanted me to give it to her but I think you are the rightful owner of the property now."
My mother?
"You know my mom?"
"We study in the same college but we lost touch "
Okay now I am beyond confused "then how did you...
" we meet. After a few years of luck, she came to my café .at that time, I was settling my business and we encountered. We talk for a few hours. I came to know she is married and blessed with a daughter. How respectable Man Jackson is and... " She stops. I could feel my heart thumping against my ears. did mom tell her how dad used to " he loves her "
My brows knitted "Love?"
"Yes, but-.."
"NO! He didn't!" I grunt standing up from my seat. Why everyone thinks he loves Mom? Respectable Man! Really. And mom Why she lied? he never loved her he only hurt her. Every day she used to cry .her painfully whimpers still fuzz me. How worthless I feel every time hiding in a closet.
My mother died because she trust a man like him. It was all because of him!
"Fate" I heard Miss Cane's voice, as she sat down beside me "calm down Fate " she cooed soothing my hands .mom used to do this. " if you only stay in the bad memories Fate how will you recollect the good once "
Good?
"There wasn't any good!" I scowl glaring at her. Her hands reached my cheeks to stroke the liquid that pour down my cheeks. Tears. Why do I have to be this weak in front of others
"Everything may look bad but, there is always good around every corner." I close my eyes letting her words engulf
"You don't know how badly he hurt Mom. Me" I confess
"Fate your Father was diagnosed with Monophobia. He never wanted to hurt anyone, he feared being left. "
"How do you know this ?'' I ask looking outside the windows
" Cause Faith told me. You and I both know your Mom had never lied"
I didn't argue with that. it was true Mom never lied
After a couple of minutes of silence, we sat down quietly gazing at Miss Cane I found her looking outside the street. It seems like she is gathering her next words or maybe I was too harsh
"I am sorry," I said audible enough to make her known
She didn't take her eyes off the street but I heard a small chuckle "You're really her daughter. Always end up guilting over things after being bitter. a kind soul who always puts others before herself. Never think of pain or danger. Always takes care of others forgetting herself. Selfless ". Her voice cracked at the end
" M-Miss Cane?" I lay a hand on her shoulder
"I'm fine " she holds my hand and squeezed a little making sure she is okay but I know she is not. I never see her this she is someone who can put a smiling face covering everything behind." It has been years since I talk about her "
"I can understand"
"Fate it was true that your father did love your Mom. But behind every idealistic face, there is a story that everyone lurks. His Monophobia begin from the moment he lost his parents. When he meets Your mother he found his family a safe home. Everything was like a fairy tale precious soft happy ..."
She glimpsed at me "However Every fairy tale has its Darkside. As you grow up he becomes possessive. At first, your mom thought it was because he loves you both, so she prefers to ignore it. Yet things went far when he started being abusive. When your mother finds out about his unusual behaviour she wanted him to visit a physicist. He even agreed to have a council with the doctors"
She fists her hands gripping the table " but when the time came he pretend to be fine cause he reckoned if he visits the doctors then maybe they will take him away from his family. Your mom thought he is okay now so she didn't push it. yet a few days later he become abusive again. Your mom was scared about your childhood. She wanted to take you away from him So she decided to Divorce.
"Divorce?"
So when they [Oh really and what about OUR Daughter? YOU THINK I WILL LET HER BE WITH SOMEONE LIKE YOU .."
"YOU DARE TO TAKE HER AWAY FROM ME ... SHE'S MINE I OWN HER, "
"Your a monster JACKSON ADIERSON I WON'T LET HER BE HERE WITH YOU, she, 's not your playtime thing she's MY Daughter !" ]
They were fighting about Me
"Yes. It wasn't easy for her to choose even though she knew your dad won't let her go. Cause he loves her with his bitter self. She wanted to protect you. The day when we ran into each other she was visiting a lawyer. She requested me to buy her a property away from him .even though I told her not to pay anything but she did. In the next few days, I finished all the work and waits for her to come and get what belong to her. But she didn't "
The day she [ "Mom where are you going I don't have school today so can we go to the park please "?
"No Fate dear momma is going to meet a friend, but she will be back soon "
"B-but then I will be alone. I don't like to be an alone mom"
"Momma will be back Honey very soon, momma promise "
"B-but?"
"Okay, how about you count"?
"Count?"
"Yes you count 1 to 5 hundred and momma will be back, but remember Fate you can't cheat "
"That's boring "
"Well if you won't do that then how will momma come back home, don't you want momma to come as soon "?
"Yes, I do"!
"Then what do you do?"
"Fine I will count I won't cheat but you have to come okay as soon "
"Of Course, Honey and momma will bring a gift for you too"
"Gift ?"
"Yes don't you want the gift .your chess board the one that you saw at the store "?
"Yes yes, mom I want. will bring me that "?
"Of course whatever my Fate wants Fate gets. "
"I love you mom"
"I know honey momma loves you more " ]
The gift wasn't the chess board. It was freedom. Freedom that my mother wanted for both of us.
" I still waited for your Mother. Hoping one day she will come but she never I left for New Harrington to start my Café there. Your mom never told me where she lived it was absurd for me to think I would find her if I try better "
I hold her hand and smiled "it's fine. You did a lot "
"No, I didn't. I stop and if I did try a lot she would live happily. But she..."
"Sshh" I embrace her "Thank you for everything. please don't blame yourself "
When she pulls back we end up smiling at each other "we look like a mess " she said
"Sure we are " Despite I get new information about my Father but there is something that I'm curious " it strange "
She looked at me her brow arched "what?"
"You know like even though you said My dad was an abuser " not gonna mention he did the same thing with me, let's just cut that part. I don't want anyone to know about my dreamy childhood. " How can you be so sure he loved Mom? "
"Love is awfully strange Fate. It is painfully frightening. It makes you doubt your existence. It makes you selfish, weird, and haunted. It takes away your strength to know what is right or wrong but it's not something that a weak person does. It takes a lot to have romantic feelings for someone "she looks at me "and about your Father's love. Never doubt that even though he was abusive and harsh. But he loved your mom more than anything anyone. Some people don't know how to show their affection. They end up hurting those people who they love vastly. They blame others cause they are scared to accept their acts "
Why do I feel like I know someone who has the same personality?
"Damm Miss Lee. How come you're still single? "
"Hmm who said I'm single "
"You're not!" I frowned
"Well I am but physically. Because soulfully I love someone "
Is there any difference?
Maybe she notices my confusion cause she answer my questions before I could ask "It means the person I love is in my memories but not physically. I can't touch her. But I can feel her "
"Her?"
I mean Am not judging her but I didn't know she is...you know
"Yes."
"Does she have a name?"
Okay, now you're getting too far.
Miss Lee didn't say anything. Only glance at me and smile " I am still your boss don't forget that " she warned playfully
"Fine " I whine
Reaching for her bag she gives me something " Vedio cassette?"
"It's your mom's Video diary. Maybe this will make you believe that your father did love both of you"
Hmm we will see that maybe
I look outside for once it was almost evening 'Shoot!' Miss Lee she will be worried "It's late now. I should go "
"Sure let's go I will drive you to Jerry's House"
"Ok " I agreed and get my things together. We went toward her car "wait how do you know about...
" I called Jerry in the morning she told me how you guys are here to spend your weekend but I did warn her about work"
"That's mean "
"Of course it is "
Before I enter the car I raise a question "Miss Cane do you think My Mom would feel proud of me ?"
Soft parted surpassed laugh cause me to look at her "Fate you are beautiful inside and out just like your mother. Don't forget she used to say she is blessed to have you "
Blessed.
Don't know about mom
But I am still blessed to have her memories with me
I went inside and close the door "You didn't tell me the name though"
"Let's just keep it hidden in my soul " She focused on the road
My sights catch a glimpse of a smile curled up on her lips
'Miss Lee you are good at hiding '
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