Chương 177: I Am Change.
30 advance chapters in my Pat.reon. Pat.reon.com/Saintbarbido.
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Finally, we're back to our MC's p.o.v
(Aden's P.O.V)
"This makes no fucking sense..."
My thoughts were a jumbled mess. I could not understand just how any of the this was possible. I went from a normal kid to an inter-dimensional traveler to an Avatar to an hero to a convict to a realm master to a father to a mass killer to being on the cusp of losing myself all in the span of a few months! Like what the fuck!
"Even while faced with the absolute and undeniable truth...you still falter."
I ridiculed myself or rather this red version of me said. I could feel the connection between us. The space separating us was only a few meters yet... everything that made him him I could perceive. I could feel it in the same way that small voice in my head always whispered. Only it had grown stronger. And not only that...it was starting to bleed over. The Penance Stare. A unique ability that Unalaq never possessed yet I did...
I was changing the more I had tried to achieve balance. One second I felt zen, methodical, logical. A resolve that demanded order and then the next, I felt illogical, spontaneous and malevolent. It was a trial in and of itself to limit the Influence both sides could exert on me when I was controlling my puppet. The perk had come in handy. If it wasn't for it...I would have been stuck in my realm running interference without carrying out some much needed plans back on earth. Especially when you consider the mission I had gotten.
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(Chain Quest Activated!)
(Let's go Villain Hunting)
First Mission:-
(Destroy the Light)
(Time to put your money where your mouth is. The League has been treating the symptoms to a terminal disease. Sooner or later, one of these fucks will accidentally press on the doomsday button while jerking off to second rate porn because they can't get it up with a real female. My money's on Luthor. He's a petty jealous cunt. You destroyed approximately 23,072,452 demons, the light should not prove to be a challenge for you right? Wrong!! Fuck this up and the kiddie gloves are off. Despite their many failures to attain global domination, ol Lex and his buddies have a few tricks up their sleeves.)
Members of the Light Taken Out:- 0/6
Mission Objectives:-
Kill Each member of the Light to prevent the same old cat and mouse game.
Carefully dismantle any countermeasures and/or dead switches they have in place in case they die.
Reveal to the world their crimes.
Mission Parameters:-
Mission Time Limit:- 3 months and 15 days. Then it's all fucked.
Mission Difficulty:- Nightmare. Yeah you heard that right...you've killed demons and demon lords but trust me...this shit is on a whole other level.
Mission Rewards:-
50 training points for each objective cleared.
200 training points for completing the mission
2 new perks.
One unique ability from the Avatar world.
P.S: The Second mission will be updated upon completion or failure of the first one.
P.P.S: If by any chance the Light replace a member taken out, the new member shall also be included in the list. Hence, it is advised you take them all out in one fell swoop.
P.P.P.S: You need someone to watch your back. Get a team.
P.P.P.P.S: To aid you in this endeavor, a new system function had been activated.
(New System Function!)
(Sentience Bundle)
-Using a certain number of Training points, you can unlock a sentient character. This character will not be the original but a copy with all the abilities and skills the original possesses.
250 training points - Bender trainee.
500 training points - Bender practitioner.
1000 training points - Special characters.
2000 training points - Expert Bender.
4000 training points - Master Bender.
20000 training points - Grand master Benders.
20000 training Points - Avatars.
20000 training points - Divine spirits.
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The rewards from the previous Chain quest had changed a lot of things for me.
Mission Complete!
(Associates Remaining: 1/5)
Objective failed!
Rewards tallied:-
100 training points.
100 training points.
One boon from Lucifer Morningstar. (Claimed)
A New Perk.
(Congratulations!! You have received a new perk! Homunculi Puppet!)
Homunculi puppet:- Through splitting your concentration, you can materialize and control one homunculi puppet with peak human physical parameters. The puppet does not need to eat or sleep and runs of an internal energy network that is sustained by your own stamina. Due to that, your original body enters a period of weakness and lethargic responses, so long as the homunculi is active. Currently, you can only use one bending art through the homunculi. Once the art is chosen, it cannot be altered up until the homunculi puppet is dematerialized.
Elemental affinity:- Fire.
Elemental skills:- White fire
White lightning.
Perk list Updated:-
Chi blocker.
Adaptive Physiology.
Hammer space.
Body Refining.
Homunculi puppet
Spark of Enlightenment.
Training points:- 386
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But even while idly replaying those memories, my mind was still stuck on those two words. When had I ever worked against myself? Linda didn't make sense. Just like my life. Nothing was making any fucking sense!
Self Sabotage huh? I thought about the conversation I was currently having with her. Even in this gray space, surrounded by nothing and standing infront of what was my biggest headache...those two words still refused to leave my mind. Self Sabotage.
"Because what else do you call someone who never takes the easy way out? You have placed such...a huge responsibility on your shoulders and stubbornly refuse to see that, it's not all about you. You push everyone away and go about every meeting expecting...no, wanting a fight. That mindset has cost you friendships, wisdom and patience. You say you are your biggest fear, Aden...and I agree. But you're also your biggest obstacle."
Her words registered in my mind through the link I had with my other body.
A punch landed on my face, throwing me away. My jaw felt a flash of pain before going numb.
"Bastard! How dare you ignore me to listen to that bitch whine about shit, while I am right infront of you?!"
I picked myself off the ground and turned to him.
"I wasn't ignoring you...just, yeah I was ignoring you."
I admitted midway, getting tired of all of it.
A kick landed in my midsection and launched me off my feet yet again. My ribs cracked and it got hard to breathe and then it disappeared suddenly. But I barely noticed it. The same words running through my mind endlessly. Self Sabotage. Am I really my biggest obstacle? The simple answer would be yes based on what was happening before me. I was getting beat up by myself. I chuckled, lips stretching out over what was supposed to be broken teeth sustained from Red's, yeah I'm calling him Red now, rant and blows.
Self Sabotage...but it wasn't as simple as that was it? It wasn't as simple as him being the bad guy. It wasn't as simple as him being chaos and hence rebelling under my control. The order Avatar State did not care for the notion of 'freedom' so what was different?
Self Sabotage.
...And then it hit me. The blows, the blows felt weak. A drop of red landed on my cheek and I understood. I looked up into my eyes. Into Red's eyes. Tears falling over a too wide smile as punches landed on my face and defenseless body. I doubled over a particularly hard blow to the belly and coughed.
"It's me. It's all me...I was looking at all of this the wrong way...it's not a fight. It was never a conflict. I took it as a conflict because that's just how I have been CHOOSING to see these things as. One battle after another. I fucking wasted 3 months! 3 fucking months when all of this could have ended with a genuine..." I looked up again, a trail of tears falling down my cheeks as well.
"I am so fucking sorry! I accept you. The whole of you!"
And just like that, a pulse of power spread out. Red stared down at me with a shocked expression. I got up to my feet and walked over to stand before him placing my hands on his shoulders.
"I HAVE been sabotaging myself. You were never my enemy. You are me for crying out loud. Everything WE do is to better ourselves. And I couldn't have done all of it without you. It was pretty obvious now that I think about it. The snark in my mission description, my leaving the team and striking out on my own the way I did, my Avatar abilities seemingly not following the same rules as a normal Avatar and my...perks! Every perk I've gotten has been something I've needed or useful!"
"The system only handles the system functions. There's no reason for it to have been issuing me perks unrelated to Avatar. It's all been you! From the start, I suppressed you because I thought of you as unneeded. As the evil thoughts in my head. As the dark side...but you're more than that... you're my inspiration where my order side as been my determination. You're my unpredictability where my order side has been my mechanical focus. My emotions to it's logic. You are the fuel where he has been the engine. I see it now...I see it now and I appreciate you."
For the longest time, Red and I stood there staring at each other and then he shrugged off my hold and turned around to start walking away.
I watched his back.
"An apology is just the start Aden...it won't fix everything, but you now know what to do...just let me out to play sometime. It sucks being holed up inside you like this. He might like it...but I am change for fucks sake."
His voice rang out as he stopped a couple meters away.
He swiped out a hand, like brushing away a curtain to reveal the outside world.
"Feast your eyes upon your own stupidity."
He stated and I was shocked to see dark pockets of chaos spread out across my main dimension.
"You really should listen to people who have been fucking with magic for eons. I fucking hate the guy, very much prefer Klarion, but Nabu was right. You cannot achieve balance between me and the other guy when your spirit is so weak..." He turned around to face me, the image of the cliff we were standing on, looking out to the spacious sea and islands of the main dimension fading away into gray again.
"You have an idea on how to undo this clusterfuck...I know you do, because I'm thinking of the same thing. Use it, it's okay. If there's anyone else who has your back apart from White and I, it's Equity."
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Ok, ok, don't lynch me please 🥺. If you were expecting a fight...then I'm genuinely sorry. Aden cannot win a fight against a part of him because he loses out in the end no matter what. Anyway to be fair, I have been giving hints all throughout. I was waiting for someone to ask me why the mission descriptions changed all of a sudden from the earlier chapters. Or why the perks didn't seem to follow conventional Avatar skills and abilities.
The Chaos driven side of his abilities has been working on the low to help out our guy and only now does he realize it. And this is the millionth time Aden has been told about his Spirit being weak, what will he do to handle that situation?
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