Chương 12: Chapter 11 - Withered Hydrangea
It was as karmic, in a way.
"What…what is this?"
Shinomiya Natsuha could barely hear her boyfriend, Yamano Yuuta's, words as she stared at the front back of the school building's foyer. There, plastered all over the walls, were photo after photo after photo of Natsuha and the school's resident delinquent and playboy, Oga Masaru, engaging in some rather filthy sex.
Teachers were scrambling to get rid of them, but it seemed that whoever had put them up had used some pretty heavy-grade glue to make sure they stuck, and the sight of a few of them running by with shredded photographs in their hands indicated that the foyer was probably not the only place in the school that had received such treatment.
Even upon arrival at the school, Natsuha had begun to sense that the atmosphere was different than usual. Judgmental glances and open staring from students who had their mobile phones out, likely receiving photos and news from their classmates already inside, had abounded. For a moment, she'd thought she must've been paranoid – after all, as far as the school was concerned, she was basically perfect.
But she hadn't been paranoid. Not at all.
"Natsu-ane…"
It took her a moment to realize that Yuuta's hand was no longer in hers, and upon turning to look at him, reeled at the look of pure outrage, despair, and fury in his eyes.
"Tell me this isn't true!" he cried out at her, drawing even more attention towards her.
Suddenly snapped out of her initial shock, Natsuha looked around her frantically, her mind quickly realizing the magnitude of the situation. Forget her boyfriend finding out – the entire school was now aware of what she'd done!
"Slut."
"Whore."
"Hypocrite!"
The whispered accusations surrounded her in a flash as her classmates and other students pounced upon her sudden and irreversible fall from grace. Her reputation had been immaculate thus far, as had her fame as a cheater-hater.
And yet she'd just been outed as one.
"No!" she denied immediately. "This…this isn't true!"
But no one believed her. She could see it in their eyes – no one was willing to give her the benefit of the doubt. The evidence against her was simply too stacked.
And then, out of seemingly nowhere, someone marched up to her and slapped her across the face. The force of the impact was such that she stumbled back, her cheek flaring up in pain, and it took her a moment to blink away the tears and pain to look up and see her attacker.
Despite the shouting of protest from teachers and other students, her aggressor seemed unmoved by what she'd done.
Oga's girlfriend.
"Whore," she spat at Natsuha.
You whore!
Unbidden memories of her mother's angry outburst at her father's mistress burst to the forefront as Natsuha superimposed the image of her heartbroken mother over the angrily weeping girl before her.
No.
No, no, no.
This couldn't be happening. Not to her. She was the cheater-hater. She wasn't a bad person! She'd only…she'd only…
She'd only become exactly what had driven her father away in the first place.
The realization broke her.
Natsuha didn't even realize she was screaming from her position on the ground, clasping her head and awash with guilt and despair, until a couple of teachers grabbed her by the arms and pulled her away from he jeering crowd of fellow students. Even when they got her to the nurse's office, she was inconsolable – alternating between horrified screaming and weeping.
No one came to soothe her.
Even the nurse, who had initially been sympathetic, quickly became cold and distant once she was made aware of what Natsuha had done. There was little sympathy to be found for a cheater, after all.
Forty minutes later, Natsuha was quickly collected by a staff member and escorted to the principal's office, where her mother had arrived with the principal and vice principal waiting as well.
For a brief moment, Natsuha hoped someone had come to make her pain go away, but one look at her mother's face told her everything.
There would be no forgiveness or compassion even at home.
"I understand that this is a private issue between students and between yourself and your daughter, Miss Shinomiya," the principal said, sweating anxiously as he tried to find the right words to address the delicate issue. "But you have to understand – a situation like this is not something the school can easily sweep aside. Despite our school's rather liberal regulations regarding student relationships, you can surely understand that something like this…"
"I understand, sir," her mother cut in with an apologetic bow. "My worthless daughter has put you all in an unforgivable position and forgotten her basic values. I can only apologize for my failings as a mother."
Those were not the words Natsuha had hoped to hear. She'd wanted – hoped – that her mother would take her side and defend her from the stares, from the jeers.
She had hoped too naively. Or perhaps she'd simply been deluded, considering what her father had put the poor woman through.
"The apology is appreciated, Miss Shinomiya," the vice principal pressed, "but it doesn't really solve our problem. As it stands, we have already begun with expulsion proceedings for Mister Oga. We'd heard rumors of his misbehavior for some time but were never able to get actionable evidence of it. However, if we don't take action against your daughter as well, there will be outcry."
Natsuha felt her blood freeze. Surely, they couldn't mean…?
Her mother shot her a disgusted and disappointed look before turning back to the school administrators. "We will, of course, accept the school's judgment," she said. "I only ask that, if possible, you take the first offense nature of her actions into account."
Natsuha silently watched the principal and vice principal eye each other for a moment before the latter sighed and looked away while the principal wiped his balding forehead with a handkerchief.
"That is a fair point, and regrettable life choices aside, Shinomiya-san has always been a diligent student," he conceded. "To that end, I don't believe expulsion is merited just yet, but I would recommend accepting a long-term suspension."
"Oh?"
It was clear where the principal was coming from. Although the severity of her actions required punishment, expulsion was too drastic an option for a first offense given the school's rather lenient policies regarding student fraternization. However, while a suspension generally lasted up to 2 weeks, no one at school would so quickly forget the incident.
It was, in a way, more for her own protection to stay at home for as long as possible than for anything else.
As the principal explained all of this to her mother, Natsuha just stared down at her thighs. It didn't matter. It honestly didn't. Two weeks or two years, no one was going to forget this. How many of her classmates had taken photos with their cellphones and were likely already sending it among each other or posting it on the internet? How many were probably going to use her photos as fap material?
The worst part is that she didn't know who had done this. There was no sign of the culprit, and the school didn't seem all that interested in finding out – after all, it would look like they were trying to blame the whistleblower for her behavior rather than Natsuha herself.
By the end of the negotiations, Natsuha was saddled with a 1-year suspension, effectively wiping out her school year. While she could and would take supplementary lessons throughout that period, the collective absences would force her to repeat a year – thereby obliterating her otherwise picture-perfect academic record.
Her mother never raised a single protest throughout the discussion. Aside from the initial glowers, in fact, her mother refused to even look at her.
It wasn't until they were both in her mother's car, well on their way back home, that she said anything.
"Yuu-kun didn't deserve that."
Those words – not of comfort for her devastated daughter, but of recrimination and pity for her boyfriend – set Natsuha off again, though she managed to keep her weeping silent.
No other words were exchanged between mother and daughter for the rest of the ride home, and even when they pulled up at the house, her mother remained silent, but didn't get out. Unsure whether to go ahead or not, Natsuha also stayed put, still quietly crying.
And then her mother said the last thing she'd wanted to hear.
"I'll call your father and make arrangements for you to move to his place," she said softly.
"Mom!"
"Enough," her mother cut her off, a heartbroken and betrayed expression on her face. "Enough, Natsuha. I haven't always been the best mother, I know that, but you knew what your father put me through when he had his affair! You know what it did to our family! And yet you lied to me each time that…that…manwhore came over to visit! You told me it was Yuu-kun, told me he was shy about it! You told me you loved him!"
Natsuha tried to reach out to her mother, but got her hand slapped away for the trouble.
"Just…go inside," her mother said, refusing to look at her.
Natsuha hesitated for a moment.
"GO, Natsuha!"
She flinched at her mother's sharp outburst and quickly scampered out of the car. Except for the day she'd found out about her father's affair, Natsuha had never seen her mother so emotionally devastated. And the realization that Yuuta was probably much the same way felt like a dagger in the heart.
Inside her room, Natsuha fell to the floor and let the tears flow again as she experienced the full weight of her guilt and remorse. She'd always prided herself about being a high-minded, moral person – but just the mere absence of her boyfriend for a few days a week had led to her abandoning everything for some carnal comfort from the guy who most resembled the man she hated so much – her own father.
She eventually heard her mother come in and, true to her word, she could hear the start of her mother's conversation over the phone with her ex-husband as she walked by the room. She really was well and truly done with her.
A few hours later, realizing her mother hadn't left her room to even have dinner, Natsuha went over and timidly knocked on the door frame.
No one answered.
Walking in tentatively, she saw her mother on her bed, facing away from the door.
"…Mom?"
Her heart caught a little as her mother didn't answer, but then relaxed as she saw a little bit of movement.
"Go away, Natsuha."
Every instinct in her body told her to comply, but she stood her ground and knelt on the ground in supplication.
"Please! Please don't send me away!" she begged. "Not to him!"
Her mother didn't move.
"Fine," she eventually said, making Natsuha's hopes soar.
"Really?!" she exclaimed, not expecting it to be so easy.
"But you can't stay here," her mother added flatly, crushing her daughter's hopes. "Then go stay with that manwhore you like so much. Or anywhere else, really. I don't care anymore. Except here. You're no longer welcome in this house."
"…Mom?" Natsuha whispered in shock, her eyes wide as she continued staring at her mother's back. "…Mom? You're joking, right? Please?"
"Go, Natsuha."
She wasn't joking, evidently.
No amount of begging or pleading got her mother to turn to face her. No amount of crying or shouting, either. Even when she threatened to kill herself, her mother hadn't budged.
In ever growing despair, Natsuha rushed back to her house and grabbed her phone, quickly looking up a particular number. Fine.
Fine.
Her mother wanted to play this game? Fine!
Toot. Toot. Toot…
Click.
"Masaru?" she asked.
"Who's this?"
The unfamiliar voice surprised her and she actually checked her phone to make sure the caller ID matched. It did.
"Where's Masaru?!" she demanded.
"Masa…oh! Yo, guys! I think this's the asshole's little slut!"
Natsuha's eyes widened as she suddenly heard jeers in the background. And in the middle of that, whimpering.
"Who is this? Where's Masaru?!" she asked.
"'Fraid he can't come to the phone, little whore. See, his dick cashed in too many checks and crossed a line it shouldn't have. So, now, we're here to teach him proper manners – ain't that right, fellas?!"
The roar of approval in the background horrified her.
"Please!" she begged. "Please don't kill him!"
"Don't worry, we won't," the unknown person on the other side assured her mirthfully. "He just won't be using his dick ever again."
A sickening sound in the background was followed by a blood-curdling scream, causing Natsuha to inadvertently sob in horrified shock.
"Well, it's my turn with the baseball bat now, so gotta run! Friendly piece of advice: get yourself checked – he's not been especially careful as far as we've heard. Toodles!"
She tried to appeal one last time to the unknown person but the line was abruptly cut. She stared down at her phone in horror and her mind raced as to what to do now. Did she call the police? Did she report this?
Her fingers were already rushing to dial the appropriate number when she froze in place. What if they didn't catch the perpetrators? What if Masaru refused to out them out of fear? What if they came after her next?
Bile began to rise up her throat and she dashed to the bathroom and threw up in the toilet. Even after she finished, though, she found herself no less panicking or unsure how to proceed. Her mother seemed dead serious about evicting her, and if she didn't make it out of this place ASAP, she'd end up with her hated father and his mistress – an ever living reminder that she was every bit as bad as he was!
She tried calling her friends – no dice. They either didn't answer or outright stopped her call attempts, and some even IM'ed her to cut off ties with her before blocking her.
In desperation, she even tried to call Yuuta despite how shameless she knew she was being.
"The number you have called cannot be reached. Please try again later or leave a voicemail after the beep…"
Once, twice, seven times she tried, only to be met with the same response. She tried IM'ing him – only the one checkmark.
He'd blocked her. That was the only explanation. Right?
In a panic, she did the only thing she could think of – she took her bike and, despite the setting sun, pedaled her way over to his house – over 1 km away. Panting and sweating, she stopped just outside his house and saw the lights were on and gave a quick prayer of thanks before setting her bike against a lamp post and then walking up towards the door.
And in that moment, the door opened and a very pissed off Ms. Yamano – Yuuta's mother – stood before her.
"Miss…Miss Yamano…"
"Leave."
The icy tone with which the word was uttered made Natsuha flinch and freeze in place. Just two days ago, her reception would've been very different. She would've been welcomed with open arms and even offered food and drink and then ushered over to Yuuta for them to hang out and bond. She'd even joked about how Natsuha would make the perfect future daughter-in-law.
Now, all Natsuha saw in those once compassionate and kind eyes was hatred and fury.
"I…I can explain…!"
If anything, that seemed to enrage Yuuta's mother even more, though she appeared to still have control of her senses because all she did was slam the door shut and very audibly lock the door.
Natsuha sank to her knees. Now what? What options were left before her now? Her friends had abandoned her, her boyfriend hated her, her school wanted her gone, her lover was probably being sent to the hospital as she knelt here, and her mother had made it clear that she was unwelcome in her own home.
Everything was gone. Everything was taken from her.
Her life, once blooming and precious, had withered like hydrangeas affected by plague. Every petal that had made her beautiful, honored, and respected had fallen – all because of the mistake she'd made.
Maybe, one day, she would bloom again – but for now, the future looked bleak.
And as the lights of her now former boyfriend's home went out one by one, Natsuha knelt there on the cold ground, a withered flower left to rot.
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