Arcana(HP Xover/WC)-2
"What's the matter kid? You barely touched your food." The man with the eyepatch said with a frown before biting into the drumstick in his hand and washed it down with beer from his jug.
"You won't grow big and strong if you eat so little. You fought well and now it's time for you to eat well!" He said with a laugh as he gestured towards the assortment of dishes in front of me; which included but was not limited to steaks, meatballs, drumsticks, fried chicken and several bottles of beer.
"Yes, thank you mister…"
"Odin. The Allfather of Asgard, the Skyfather of Norse pantheon, the lord of madness and lots of other ridiculous titles." He said with a roll of his eye before grinning. "But you can call me gramps, you are my descendant after all." The god king declared with a thumb up before starting to eat the bone of a T-bone steak.
"Yes, about that, I am rather... confused at the moment." I said, trying to be as polite as possible. I knew that the Added Potential and Extra would cause me to be related to Odin, I just didn't know how.
"Confused? Well I guess you didn't have anyone around to explain this to you." He said as he scratched his chin before taking a Gendo Ikari pose. "You see Rigel; when a man and a woman, or a man and a man or a woman and a woman, love each other very much..."
"That's not the part I'm confused about." I said with my hand waving in front of my face and tried to hold my temper, this was the kind of shit I was expecting from Loki or Zeus. "I was confused about how exactly we were related, and about my possible family." I hinted at the end, wanting answers.
"Hmm, oh yeah, that." Odin said after blinking twice and downing another beer. "Well that's a bit of a long story. It all starts with your father's family, the Blacks." Oh.
Well that wasn't actually that much of a surprise, being a Metamorphmagus was a part of the Black bloodline after all. Which meant that I was the bastard of a Black.
"Yeah; about a few hundred years ago, when those guys left Egypt for these lands, I ended up meeting with your many times grandmother, Cassandra." Odin said with a happy sigh. "She was one of the best mortal lovers I had in my life, I met her right after she murdered her husband." Wait, what?
"From what she told me, the dude was something of a dick and was asking for it. I honestly don't know, I didn't really care. But I did spent around two years disguised as the bastard before faking my death so that Cassandra could keep the whole fortune and have a son. Hehe, good times." This guy. "Unfortunately; the quality of your family started to go down after four generations, with my blood being too diluted, and it ended up the current shit-fest it is today where you lot are no different than mortal wizard with some of you inheriting the whole shapeshifting thing from me."
"Wait, if your blood is that diluted then why are you actually calling me a descendant?" I asked with a frown. "You are a god, such a thing should have meaning." The way he had phrased the situation should meant that I shouldn't be getting anything from our blood connection, especially his recognition.
"That's where your parents come in." Odin said with a smirk, seemingly unbothered by my interruption. "Your dad isn't actually important, he was the normal one among your parents, your mother on the other hand." And then a frown appeared on the chief god's face, he looked like he had just bitten on something sour. "Not gonna lie, I'm not sure what to think of your mother. She's something of a shifty bitch, and I'm the one saying that so that's saying something alright." Oh boy, I had a rough idea who my mother was now. Mostly because I had spoilers in the form of Added Potentials I had chosen.
"She's a god like me, except I am far better than her in every way, so I guess her ichor may have reignited mine inside you. It's kind of impressive how much a freak of nature you are kid." He said with a laugh. "It almost makes me sad that you didn't get killed by that Lindworm. If you did I could have just whisked you off to Valhalla." And then I was reminded me very clearly that the man in front of me was not human.
"…I'm sorry to disappoint you."
"Nah don't worry. This simply means you are even more interesting than I thought." He said with a chuckle. "Still, I'm kinda surprised that I'm the one explaining all of this shit to you. Most of the time monsters would be after you like a virgin with his porn mags, yet your presence was almost unnoticeable before I got close. Wonder if you got that from me or your mom." He then started to mumble about concepts of mystery and the legends of going unnoticed, which I understood about thirty percent of it.
"You don't seem to like my mother." I said as I tried to get the conversation back on track, which caused Odin to look at me with a raised eyebrow.
"No, not really. I mean she might be a shifty bitch but to be perfectly honest, my problem is with her extended family. They are all cunts." Says the guy who was disappointed I didn't die. Worse, he wasn't wrong. "Especially that brat who's leading them, he's like an unholy combination of that arrogant chicken head Horus and that son of a bitch Loki. All pride and posturing until he finds a nice piece of ass, then the bastard just turns into a fucking goose."
"I think I know who my extended family is now." I deadpanned, could he have been any more obvious.
"That's one of the reasons I claimed you. Not only do I now have a super special snowflake descendant out in the open, it's also a giant middle finger to those cunts!" He said with a jolly smile before starting to laugh. "Man I really wish I could get to see what kind of constipated face that brat will make." And then he kept laughing for a few more minutes for good measure, the image of an annoyed Zeus seemed to really make him happy.
"As a matter of fact, let's make it even more official. How would you like a little quest kid?" Odin asked with an all teeth smile and I couldn't help but get curious.
"Another Lindworm?"
"Nah, not a quest like that. It's something about that little magic school of yours, the one with that ridiculous house system. What was its name again, Boaracnee?"
"Hogwarts, and I'm a Ravenclaw."
"Yeah that! And a raven, cool; I love ravens! As a matter of fact I have Hugin and Munin on a very special mission in Jotunheim where they poop on Farbauti's head everyday!" This guy was a god. "Not the point though. The thing is, your stupidly named school will be hosting a tournament this year with two other schools; cause nothing helps magical education like a little bloodsport." I... I couldn't say whether he was being sarcastic or not.
"So here's the little quest, I want you to enter this tournament and win it! You do that and I will have a proper magical foci prepared for you in place of that little stick of yours." He said with a giggle but I wasn't paying much attention to that.
Triwizard Tournament, the thought of entering it this year had crossed my mind. It would have been a nice change of pace after the last three boring years, but I hadn't really decided on it. But if a fucking god told me to enter and offered me a magic weapon out of it... it was a no brainer.
"I accept."
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As he watched his descendant teleport away with a wizard technique, that he was pretty sure to be illegal to use in the boy's age, he couldn't help but smile fondly. It had been a while since he had interacted with a mortal that wasn't a hot woman with less than saintly intentions. Sure, the boy was a mortal in only the loosest sense definition, considering his ridiculous heritage, but still.
"I'm surprised you took such an interest in the boy."
"I was wondering when you were gonna stop with that embarrassing attempt of hiding." Odin chuckled as he turned to look at his son. Vidar, the Aesir god of retribution and a minor deity of honor. He liked the boy, he had a good head on his shoulder; which was something of a rarity among Odin's sons. He wouldn't lie and say that he didn't have a soft spot for him considering the fact that he was meant to be the one to avenge his death in Ragnarok but this whole mysterious shtick he was trying had gotten old two hundred years ago, mostly because he wasn't really good at it.
"What can I say, the boy kind of reminded me of a younger version of myself. I just couldn't help but want to see what would happen."
"To me he looked more like a more tame version of Loki." Vidar said with a raised eyebrow and Odin had to hold himself back from groaning.
Honestly, his family's hate boner for Loki was such a drag. Yeah the bitch was meant to bring Ragnarok and did orchestrate Baldur's death but what was the point of just hating him all the time, especially considering that they would all die anyway.
Also, it wasn't like what Odin had claimed was mutually exclusive with Vidar's words. Odin and his blood brother were quite similar in many ways, even more so in their youths. Hell, the chief god was pretty sure that if he and Loki switched sides for a century then nothing really important would change. Hel, he would be surprised if Thor or Hermod even noticed.
"The kid has a bright future ahead of him, not to mention helping him will inevitably piss off those wankers on that stupid mountain. That's always a bonus." He declared as he conjured another beer bottle and downed it in one go. "Not to mention helping him costs me practically nothing." As a matter of fact, he already had started helping the boy anyway so what was another little nudge before the whole tournament quest started.
Now then, who was the current head of the family of his descendant and how to tip him off in the most amusing way?
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