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There Is No God To Answer

James almost spat blood, what the hell was this? He had been taken aback by her announcement, however, his now ex-girlfriend had a neutral expression that for reasons pissed him off.

Dehlia was of course not the first woman he dated, and the others he ended the relationship with, normally ended up crying in this scenario. But Dehlia was calm, no, too calm for his liking that he began to wonder if he was doing her a favor by breaking up with her.

"Okay? Just that?" James was dumbfounded. For someone who just broke up with his girlfriend, he looked like someone who was dumped instead.

Dehlia stared at him in confusion, "Is there anything else? Isn't this how normal couples break up?" She wondered.

James snorted in disbelief, his man pride was hurt. To think that the woman he invested his emotions in was emotionally detached. 

"You know what?" There was a cruel smile on his face, "Continue to live like this, treat the same guy that comes next exactly the same way you treated me,"

"There wouldn't be another guy," Dahlia blunted out. 

"What?" He was stunned, "What do you mean by that?" 

"We are not romantically involved anymore and that means you're not entitled to have a share of my thoughts," She stood up, "This is the point where I take my leave," 

James was left unfulfilled, it felt like he had not gotten the closure he wanted, above all, he was irritated by her pride - as he thought. 

So just as Dahlia tried to turn, he reached out to grab her but his hand mistakenly swept down the ice tea she had not finished and it splashed on the inseam of her pants and down to her shoe. 

Although she was shocked by the move, James was more shocked than her because right now, he seemed like an annoying boyfriend who was unable to let go of his girlfriend after she called it quits in the eyes of the audience watching them in the restaurant.

"Gosh, I'm so sorry...." He moved towards her, "I didn't mean to -" He wanted to bend down and wipe the soiled area on her pants with his handkerchief, however, Dehlia was quick to stop him.

"It's alright," She moved her leg from his touch, "It's just a cloth that would wear out sooner or later anyway. Have a nice day," she said to him and hardly took another step when he blocked her path. 

 Dehlia sighed, what now? 

"Did you ever love me or even had an atom of feelings for me at all?" James asked. He had to know; it was essential to the closure he needed. 

"Tell me!" He demanded when she wouldn't say a word. 

Dehlia ran her hand through her hair and then let it out, "I tried to," 

"And?" 

"It just didn't work out. I told myself that all I needed was time and I would get the hang of it. But it just didn't happen the way I wanted. It doesn't interest me at all," She finally confessed. 

"You don't go into a relationship to get the hang of it nor to relieve your  boredom -" 

"I never wanted to be involved with this in the first place. You were the one who suggested we dated," Dahlia pointed out. 

"Of course," James smiled wryly, "In the end, all the blame comes down to me..." he looked into her eyes, "You do know I liked you," 

"I know, that was why I tried. This is all my fault," Dehlia finally acknowledged her own fault. 

It had come as a surprise to her when he asked her out the first time. She was not exactly the most outgoing and her colleagues had tagged her a boring person. However, it is much easier not to get affected when you have zero expectations from life. 

That was the safe cocoon Dahlia lived in and doesn't plan to leave it anytime soon. Life was vanity upon vanity; you grow, go to school, work hard, get married, give birth, train the kids and then die - sometimes those dreams were left unfulfilled thanks to death. Hence, why bother to work so hard when everything would be a waste in the end?

"And because I liked you, I take back my words," James said to her bewilderment, "I pray that you find someone that would rock your world hard. A person that would unfreeze that frozen heart and stir up the waters of your soul. And just when you're up so high, you'd come crashing down so hard that there would be no one to brace your fall, only then, would you understand what it feels like to be loved," 

For a moment, nobody said a word until Dahlia stepped forward and whispered, "Sorry, but I stopped believing in prayers long ago because there is no God to answer,"

And with that, Dahlia took her leave, and thankfully, he didn't go after her.. 


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