Chương 6: Chapter 05
{A week later}
I was sitting in dark place but I knew it was my backyard. How did I know that? I don't know.
I saw the light. I smiled because I knew it was the mystery guy. I stood up and waited for the ball of light to reach me.
"Hey, I missed you." I spoke but I almost got shocked when it answered me.
"I missed you too." A voice spoke. I could tell it was Mr. Brown's voice.
"Are you Mr. Brown?" I asked it.
"Who do you think I am, Noah?"
"I don't know. You just sound like him." I shrugged.
"Noah, it's all in your imagination. I am not even a real person." I looked at him in utter confusion.
"What do you mean?"
"First you didn't know who the person was and you never heard me speak, now you think it's your 'Literature' teacher, you are hearing his voice. Tomorrow you will think it's one of your friends and I'll sound just like them." He spoke. I shifted my gaze away from him.
"So, you are not really the mystery guy?"
"I could be anyone you want me to be, Noah."
"Wait, how does that work?" I asked.
"Think of Keith and you will hear Keith's voice."
"So, it's all going in my head?"
"Yes. It's all in your head Noah but that doesn't make it unreal."
"Huh? What do you mean? If this is in my head how it can be real?" I asked in confusion.
"I told you I am just the ball of light. I can be anyone you want to be your ball of light in your real life."
"So, are you saying that I want my Literature teacher to be my ball of light?"
"No Noah, I am not saying that. It's all you" I heard him and the light started to fade away.
"No wait! I have more questions" I yelled but it was dark again.
I opened my eyes and sat on my bed.
Another dream.
I sighed and made myself get out of the bed. I could tell it was still night because if it was morning I would have felt a burn in my eyes.
I decided to sleep more and changed my position. But the dream kept flashing back in my mind.
Do I really want Mr. Brown to be the light in my life? Mr. Brown is my literature teacher and I can't really think about him like that. But why do he smells like the mystery guy? Is he the mystery guy?
After an hour of struggle I finally fell back to sleep.
********
As the bell for the recess rang, I started packing my stuff. I made my way out of the class bumping into students.
"Noah!" I turned around when I heard Jessica's voice.
"Yeah, Jess?" I answered her when I felt her presence around me.
"Are you going to café with us or are you going to disappear again?" She asked.
"Umm Jess I... I don't know."
"Noah, it's not a complicated answer. I was just asking you because Anna and I have to do homework early as we have to go on a party this evening and Keith will be with Mateo that leaves Isaac who is not feeling well and going home."
"Yeah, I'll be alright. Don't worry about it" I assured her.
"Are you sure?"
"Positive." I smiled and she patted my shoulder.
"Well, off I go then. I will see you in literature." I nodded and made my way to meet the mystery guy, hoping he would turn up.
I sat on the bench but there was something different today. I could feel someone's presence there.
"Hello…" I said stretching my arms forward to touch someone if they were there.
"I know you’re there." I said and heard soft footsteps.
"Okay… you are really creeping me out so please stop." I chuckled nervously. I felt an arm around my waist and I jumped.
"Woah man I- wait… are you the mystery guy?" I asked and heard a clap. I let out a breath I didn't know I was holding.
"You scared me." I sat back on the bench and felt him sitting beside me.
"So where were you?" I asked him and sat straight.
"Yeah, of course you are not going to respond like always and I will keep talking to myself like an idiot as I always do." I huffed and crossed my arms on my chest. I felt his hands on my cheeks. I shoved them away.
"No, stop it. It's okay if you want to stay quiet but at least you should have told me you wouldn't be seeing me. I thought maybe I said something you didn't like or maybe you got bored." I felt a lump in my throat. I gulped. I hated it when I started crying while arguing.
I waited for the answer but there was no response. I shook my head chuckling bitterly.
"You don't have any explanation, right?" I felt a hand on my hand. I pulled my hand back.
"I said stop it. Why is it so important for you to hide from me?" I asked annoyingly.
"Is it because you're older than me? I told you it won't change anything!" I said and heard a sigh.
"So this is it? You were avoiding me because you are older than me?" I asked turning my head to his direction hoping maybe I'd see him but no it was dark as always.
"You said you are neither my senior and nor my junior and you are not even in my class so does that mean you are a teacher?" I didn't know why I asked that but I did. Maybe it had to do something with the dream.
I felt his breath hitching. I smiled and felt around to grab his hand.
"It's alright. I don't care. You don't have to be scared." I stroked his hand with my thumb. He pulled me in by placing a hand on my neck and kissed my forehead. I knew it was a goodbye. I didn't want him to go just now.
"Lead me to the lockers please." I said and felt his grip tightened on my hand. He pulled me up and led me slowly to the lockers.
"So... are you going to go now?" I asked and waited for him to say or at least clap but nope, nothing.
"Noah, what was Mr. Brown doing with you?" I heard Jessica.
What? Mr. Brown?
"Mr. Brown?" I asked confused.
"Yeah, you were talking to him but he saw me and left." she said. So the mystery guy is Mr. Brown.
Was I surprised? Yes. Was I disappointed? No.
"Umm... I was talking about the... the assignment he gave us." I lied to her.
"What assignment, Noah?" Jessica asked and I could hear the confusion in her voice.
"Uh... it was... look Jess, I have to go." I shut the locker and tried to walk away but she held me by my arm.
"What is it, Noah?" I could feel the concern in her voice.
"Nothing, Jess. I am just a little stressed. I'll see you in the class." the second those words came out of my mouth, the bell rang.
"Coming with you." She said and we both made our way to the literature.
So, Mr. Brown is the answer. He is the mystery guy. I can't believe.
"Noah, sit down." Jessica said. I didn't even know when we reached the class. I took the seat and Jess sat beside me.
I was in my own thoughts. I didn't give much attention what Jessica was talking about but I could tell it had something to do with Anna and the homework and the party.
"Noah…" Jess shook me and I came out of my thoughts.
"Yeah." I said.
"You weren't listening to me, right?" I bit my lip. Before I could answer there was a shuffle in the class and then pin drop silence.
"Mr. Brown's here." Jessica whispered.
"I know" I just looked down. I was feeling so nervous. If what Jessica said was right, that I was talking to Mr. Brown then maybe Mr. Brown was the mystery guy or maybe that mystery guy left and Mr. Brown was just passing by and stopped when he saw me talking to myself.
Ugh! Why is it so difficult? Why can't I just admit that it was Mr. Brown? Do I want it to be someone else? I don't think so.
During the whole class I didn't pay much attention. I was going in and out of my thoughts. As soon as the class ended, I turned to Jessica.
"Hey, can you please take me to Mr. Brown's office?" I asked her.
"Yeah sure, but what about your next class?"
"Umm... just take me to his office…"
"Noah, is everything okay? You color has turned pale. Are you stressed over something?" she asked.
What pale looks like?
"No, I am not stressed over anything. Just take me there." She hummed and led me to Mr. Brown's office without questioning further.
"Here we are. I should go. I'm late for the next class." I gave her a nod and heard the sound of her footsteps fading. To say I was nervous was an understatement. My hands were so sweaty that my cane was slipping out of my hand. I let out a poof of air and breathed in.
I slowly opened the door.
"Mr. Brown." I said in a low voice. I heard some shuffling.
"Yes. Come in." I walked in and closed the door behind me.
"Sit down." I heard his velvety, marshmallow type voice. I sat down on the seat.
"What brought you here, Noah?" He asked and my mouth went dry.
What should I say? Are you the mystery guy who shows up every time I need him?
"Umm... I... Are you... Nothing." I stuttered and gave up.
Who was I kidding I wasn’t brave enough to ask that.
"Noah, what is it?" He asked politely.
"Were you there when... I was..." I stopped in the middle sentence.
Why it is so hard to ask a simple question?
"Yes" He answered, politely yet firm.
"Uh- what?" I asked him and heard him clear his throat.
"Yes Noah, I was there when you were taking things out of your locker." He responded and I just nodded.
What else I was supposed to say?
"Is there something else you want to ask?" He inquired and I shook my head because I didn't know how to word the thoughts in my mind. His admission that he was there didn't confirm that he as the mystery guy.
"I should go I guess." I said getting up from the seat.
"Okay." I heard him. I was about to turn when I thought that I should at least ask him what he was doing there.
"Umm... Mr. Brown?"
"Yes, Noah?" I sat back on the seat, fidgeting with my fingers.
"What were you doing there?" I asked and heard him chuckle.
"I was there, talking to you, Noah or just there with you… not talking."
Uh what? With me? Does that mean he is-
"Yes, I am. I am the guy you have been talking to, during the recess since your first day." He answered my thoughts with a bit of fear in his voice. His voice was shaking.
I was startled. It is right? He is the mystery guy but why did he think I was worth his time? I am blind and-
"Noah." He snapped me out of my thoughts.
"Huh?"
"It's okay if you don't want to talk to me anymore. I promise it won't affect your grades if that's what you are scared about. I am not that kind of teacher." He spoke softly. I shook my head.
"I wasn't thinking about that" that's all that came out of my mouth.
"I am sorry. I mean I should have told you about me but-"
"Why didn't you?"
"I don't know. Maybe I was afraid of your reaction."
"Why aren't you afraid now?" I asked crossing my arms on my chest.
"Maybe because you told me not to be" He answered.
Yeah of course.
"But still you didn't tell me. I found out." I spoke and there was silence. I waited for his answer but didn't get one.
"Why did you run when Jessica arrived?" I asked him hoping he would answer this.
"Noah, why don't you understand that I am your teacher and I must not be seen with you?"
"Fair enough." I said and put my hand on desk, clasping them.
"One more question." I uttered.
"Shoot it" He answered.
"Why me? Why not someone else? Why did you think I was worth your time?" I asked carefully.
"Umm.... That's not one... those are three questions." He chuckled. I smiled because that was the same chuckle I used to hear but in barely audible voice.
"Yeah, but have the same meaning." I shrugged.
"No, they don't." He laughed.
"Alright stop laughing." I pouted and he stopped.
"Okay but don't you have class?" he asked.
"I uh... I skipped it." I said lowering my head.
"And you're telling me this knowing that I am a teacher."
"Yeah because you won't do anything." I said smugly.
"And why so?" he asked.
"I don't know you tell me. Would you?" I asked wiggling my eyebrows.
"You are quite enjoying this. Aren't you?" He asked playfully.
"Well, I was just stating facts. By the way, don't you have anything productive to do? Why are you sitting here, answering my useless questions?"
"I have papers to grade but since you are here wasting my precious time..." He said playfully. I gasped.
"So Mr. Brown, I think I should go because I am wasting your time." I faked hurt expression.
"If you insist Noah Carter." He chuckled and I got up.
"Well… you didn't answer my question, Mr. Brown" I said and was about to leave when I heard him.
"Some questions are better left without answers." He spoke. I turned around.
"Are you afraid of something?" I asked frowning.
"Aren't we all afraid of something?" I nodded and got out of his office.
********
I was lying on my bed thinking about Mr. Brown of course. I smiled at the thought. I was not disappointed. Mr. Brown was the guy that girls drooled over. It was an honor that he thought I was worth his time not just because he was hot. No. Not at all because I had no idea, how he looked like. All I knew was that he was a kind-hearted, considerate person.
"I'm home, sweetie." I heard my mum and smiled. I made my way down the stairs.
"Mum you came early?" I said entering the living room.
"I didn't have much work to do." She responded and I sat beside her.
"Mum I need to tell you something…" I said. She kissed my forehead.
"What is it, cupcake?" She inquired in her motherly tone.
"I uh... I am... nothing." I didn't know how to tell my mother that I am still minor but I am kinda interested in my teacher.
"Speak up sweetie. Say whatever it is in your mind." She brushed the fringes off of my face.
"I am... I need to help Keith with math's test so, maybe I'll come home late tomorrow." I lied.
"Oh honey, that's good. I want you to spend time with your friends" she said and I nodded.
I felt so bad for lying but how could I just tell her when I am not even sure if Mr. Brown is interested in me or not? Maybe he just likes to spent time with me. But I am sure that I like him. There's nothing not to like about him.
“But that’s not what you wanted to tell me. Tell me when you’re ready.” Mum spoke. She was the best mother. She never forced me to tell her what was going in my head or my life. I kissed her cheek and nodded.
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