'Hoooo~....let's go!!! Come on come on! Give me something! Allah! Jesus! Zeus! Ra! Save meeee!!!...status'
[Bing bing bing bing bong! Congratulations, loser! You finally got your first gear! Took ya long enough! New section of status unlocked!]
—————————
Name: Kim Min-chul
Age: 5
Titles: Cutest Meat Shield (Charm x1%)
HP: 12/12
STR: 20+2 (LOCKED) RES: 15 (LOCKED)
SPD: 30 (LOCKED) STAMI: 20+2 (LOCKED)
INT: 31
₲Coins: 0
———Gear———
Head: None! Wow! You suck!
Torso: None! Wow! You suck!
Arms: None! Wow! You suck!
Legs: Origami Legs ┃ (Inferior Paper Set) ┃ SPD +2 STAMI +2 ┃ Kicking Power x5%
—————————
'Ahahahahaha...that's a funny joke there, Feelie. I never though you were the joke-y type. I'm gonna check again, okay~~? Status'
—————————
Title: Cutest Meat Shield (Charm x1%)
—————————
'Ahahahaha. This is getting not too funny now Feelie. Ahehehe'
[the hell are you talking about? That's your title? Aren't you supposed to be grateful, you narcissist]
'Ahhh, Feelie Feelie Feelie...me being cute, I can get behind that but...THE HELL IS UP WITH MEAT SHIELD!!! And the scouters, they will come for me and they will be hungry for "good-looking kids" like me!'
[first of all, yes'm you are a meat shield and that title is permanent until you receive another]
'Ggrrrahhhhhh!!!'
Honestly, despite my complaining, I can't be too angry since my charm increases by 1% which isn't too bad.
After about 5 or so minutes of walking and choo-choo-ing by Kimi, we are eventually let go and Kimi-chan bids us farewell. The police, who were trailing us immediately brought me to safety.
Very weird since the other hostages were completely ignored and all 20 officers escorted me back to mom; not that I'm complaining.
"MAMAAA!!!"
"Oh oh oh...my baby boy. Are you okay?"
She starts petting my head and her tears are dripping onto my hair. Damn it! Don't cry! Grahhhhh!!!
"Un!"
As mom and I continue to hug, I hear the various new reporters crowding around us. It's very annoying but mom won't let me go what can I even do?
Tell them off? I'm 5 for crying out loud. As if they'd care about a 5 year old's words. Too bad for them, mom is here...mwuahahahaha!
"Min-chul, do you mind going with uncle Seung-ri?"
"Un! Bye bye mama!"
After Seung-ri picks me up and starts checking for bruises, I see the reporters trying to crowd around my mom and Seung-ri. Asking various questions about us.
I see mom say something politely to them and they immediately leave. What? When did reporters in Korea get so well-mannered? This isn't normal...whatever!
This isn't my problem.
(With Mom)
"Excuse me ma'am! Why did you let your kid get taken?!?!"
"How do you feel now that your son is back!?!?
"Ma'am! I have a 4 year old daughter! May we have a marriage agreement? My daughter would be pleased!"
Constant question bombarded Min-hee without mercy, all of them very personal. Some questioning her mental state, some asking how her son got so cute but there were the worst offenders...
Those who doubted her talents as a mom.
She knows she's a good mom; Jung is the perfect example of this. Whenever she sees Jung come home with bruises, she is worried but hearing the stories makes her so proud of him.
I mean, her boy is a hero. Who wouldn't be proud?
And now? Something out of her control was being blamed onto her. Who told that security guard to leave her boy alone? Who told Kimi-chan to invade Red's Wonderland?
Not her, that's for sure. And yet they blame her boy's kidnapping on her. It's an insult since if she was a bad parent, he'd naturally be a bad child; which he isn't.
And now? They stepped on the tiger's tail...
"Haah? I'm a what? A̶̧͖͚̱̰̪̱̳̣͉̋͌̎̌̆̎͋́̂̎͐̋͗͛͊̔̀̚̚͝͠͝ ̶̨̙̻͇̮̎̈́̑̒͑͂͆̈̎͘͘̕͠͠͠ͅͅḇ̵̢̘̘̥̬͎̦̮̮̱̩͍̟̟͎̤͇̳̗̳̉̏͊͐̐̀́̽́͊̀̆͛͆̑̍̑̾̀̈́͘͜͜͠͠ͅa̴̯̰̗̮̟͙̜̰̦͙͚̋̑͊̀̌́͗͜͠͝ͅd̴̛̬͎͖͉͇͍̮̱̭̞̮̭̓̓̍̊̃̋̒͐̔́̿̔͆̽̽̓́̕͘͝͝ ̸̛̘̟̠͈̺͇̭̬͎̥̂̾͐̀̂̽̊̎̀̓͊̅̆̏͗̅̄̓̏̾̕͝i̷͈̥̥̞̲̣̐́̑ṋ̶̨͛̋͒͆̏̅͗̔͒̓͝͠f̶͇̩̹͖̭͔̯̣̳̫̗͓̬̼͙̮͔̼̞̟̤͊̒̉̾͛̃̂̔͗͆̽͐̒͆̚͘͜͜͝ͅḽ̶̛͉̼̊͂̌̀̍́͒̓́́̽̓̂͘͝û̴̜̩̜͙͉͍̳̰͚̪̫̠̹́͑̾́̒̐̅̓̍̅̈́́͝e̵̢̞̤̥̠͕̤̝͆̈̎͊̆͛̈̓̓̈́̍̏̀̾͝͝͝ń̶̢̨͈̩̰̙̬̰̥̹̺̬̱̭̟͎̭̇̊̃̀̂͛̔͂͌̿̎̃̔̐̚͜͝͝ͅc̷̡̛̮̘̳͚̦͎̣̺͉̫͇͚̟̫͊͗̓͊̏̄͆͒̎̓͌̔̏̀̏̌̏͘͜͜ẻ̷̢̢̡̟͕͕̞̰̦̼̲̣̝̰̮̙̩̜̜̪̻̗̺̦̏̆̾́͐̉̈́̀͌̏̌̑́͋̄̇̓̕͜͠?..."
They are instantly assaulted with a mix of painful, sorrowful and screaming voices and melodic and calmly singing. Like if a metal rock band and a siren were singing into their ears.
Nobody was spared.
The cameramen, the news reporters, the boom mic guy and all the other staff they brought to the site. They all heard the 'languages' and it was horrifying yet...it calmed them.
They felt extremely cold for a while and then warm. Like going home after a long day of work. The voices caused the problems but then fixed them, giving a sense of help and comfort.
As the voices were clawing away at their resolve to get information, the radio stations and TV channels were all confused by the lackadaisical performance of their veteran reporters.
One of the reporter has even been working for around 15 years and this situation has never happened where all reporters have a blank stare into nowhere and some have a slight smile on their face that occasionally turns into a frown.
"So? Do you mind asking your questions about my parenting strategy again?"
""No! Sorry, ma'am, we were just excited""
"That's good...alright then, I'll be going"
(With MC)
I see the reporter all make way suddenly for mom to get to me. She pounced and hugs me so that I'm squished into her busom. Comfy yet embarrassing.
We are taken to the police station in the captain's car and need to file a report. I bump into some of the illustrators and... well well well, if it isn't the drawer himself.
He looks at me and remember the drawing that flew off to where I was; his face sinks. He probably thinks that since I'm a child, I'd blab and such.
Well, despite the tempting offer, I'd like to decline. First of all, how would I describe the illustrator's drawings and that he took some for himself? Would it even matter to the police?
"Alright son, take a seat right there...now, do you mind telling us the complete story?"
I take a deep breath and tell what went down...obviously I'm telling the truth! I have no idea what weird story of superhero saving the city they made up so I'm telling the truth.
As I continue with the distraction of "Kimi-chan and the illustrator were on top of each other and barking into each other", you could see the police officer's face go from normal to white then to red.
Oh boy was he angry.
Continuing on, I don't give him anything else, saying I just covered my eyes while the whole thing was going down.
He lets me off with a twitchy smile and as mom is driving out of the lot in the car dad brought, I heard the police officers yelling to bring the illustrator's back.
Ahehe, sorry!
[waaaa, you know what? I'm going to give you a new title just for that]
'Really?!?! Thank God! Status!!!'
[ding ding ding! New title unlocked!]
—————————
Name: Kim Min-chul
Age: 5
Titles:
Cutest Meat Shield (Charm x1%)
Little Snitch ( Charm -10%, Social Skills -5%)
HP: 12/12
STR: 20+2 (LOCKED) RES: 15 (LOCKED)
SPD: 30 (LOCKED) STAMI: 20+2 (LOCKED)
INT: 31
₲Coins: 0
———Gear———
Head: None! Wow! You suck!
Torso: None! Wow! You suck!
Arms: None! Wow! You suck!
Legs: Origami Legs ┃ (Inferior Paper Set) ┃ SPD +2 STAMI +2 ┃ Kicking Power x5%
—————————
'Ahhhhhh! What the hell, Feelie!? Didn't you want me to tell the truth?'
[tsk tsk tsk. Snitches snitches...humans are very selfish]
'Screw you, Feelie! Humph!'
Honestly, I chose to use the Meat Shield title over Snitch. So what if I snitched? They were the perverts!
I ignore Feelie for the next few hours and when I'm about to sleep, I don't even say good night to him! Take that, Feelie!
As I'm about to sleep however, I hear a light crying noise inside my ears. Obviously, it's Feelie and obviously obviously, he's crying since envié ignored him for a while.
Silence is deafening.
[Min-chullll~~~ talk to me! Hic!...hic!]
'No! You were mean and now I don't like you!'
[but I didn't give you that title! It was ko- super cool epic superb awesome handsome koppa!]
'Ahhhh, so it was the fault of the narcissistic and bastard God, eh?'
That's it! I'm gonna kill you for re-
"Ara ara, do you mind finishing your sentence, my boy?"
"I meant that I'm gonna kill you for real....in this game! I'm playing with my friend right now!"
"Ahhhh, got it got it...remember, respect the mortal's lives~"
Seeing that he filled his mom once again, he continues calming himself down thinking about the various gifts he'll give Min-chul in the future!
'Mwuahahahaha! They say harems are good but too much women are a problem...let's see how you deal with your "little" woman problem! Mi-young? I'll give her the curse of languages as well! You can't stop me!' (Koppa)
Unknown to Min-chul, the good that gave him his system was the one plotting against him. He will use reverse tactics!
Instead of stealing his women, he'll give Min-chul so much women there will be infighting! Instead of killing his parents, he'll make them so loving that they won't die until Min-chul has grown up!
Back on earth, Min-chul realizes that he was wrong; again. Yes, Feelie was a bit rude but did it really warrant ignoring him?.....
In Min-chul's mind, yes. 100% absolutely yes. I mean, why wouldn't it warrant it? Why should Min-chul be so merciful and benevolent? He isn't a God!
But probably, for Feelie, despite his existence as a higher being, he didn't think it was worth that much. So, Min-chul apologizes to Feelie for everything he's done.
'Sorry Feelie'
[yeah yeah yeah, whatever. Humph! Just go to sleep already, dummy]
Hearing the way Feelie responds, it really reminds him of a certain anime trope...what was it called again? Tsu? Sun Tzu? Oh! Tsundere!
'Why are you acting like a girl now? Freaking tsundere'
[wha-? I'm not a tsundere! Yo-]
Seeing that Feelie is back to his usual self, Min-chul blocks out the annoying scream one last time before he goes to bed.
'Hahaha...night mom, dad, Jung, Feelie...'
As Min-chul dozes off, he misses one thing...
[.......night, Min-chul]
A silent whisper, not heard by anyone except the owner of the voice. Feelie start shutting down his system as he gets ready for another day's work.
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(A.N) yo! Another chapter back for you readers! I hope you enjoyed so far and do consider supporting! Any little thing helps; even commenting can make my day! Peace ✌️!
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