The next morning was a disaster, to say the least. I woke up with a raging headache, my mouth feeling like I have cotton stuffed inside.
I dragged my heavy body out of my bed and went to the kitchen in search of a nice cold glass of water. I took two aspirins and praying to start them working as soon as possible. I needed to take a nice cold shower that will wake me up from the mess in my head.
After showering and brushing my teeth, I finally got out of the bathroom, put some clothes on, and check my phone. It was 12 p.m. already. Thank god, I have nothing planned today.
I have 3 unread messages and 2 missed calls. My heart started racing when the memory of Jake's words before he left me came rushing to my head. Did he call me already?
I opened the messages first and I had a message from Hanna, asking me if I'm awake and to call her ASAP and explain what the f* happened yesterday. Yep, she's not the only one who needs some sort of explanation.
The next message was from mum.
*Hey sweetie, how was your Halloween? Are you coming tomorrow for Sunday lunch? You can bring Hanna if you want. Just let me know.*
My mum is so nice; I'd like to think some of her character rubbed out on me. Even though, I think I'm more a mixture of my mum's kindness and my sister's strong will. The stubbornness part, I think I got this all on my own.
The third one was from Becca, asking me if I saw Jake yesterday. Apparently he mentioned something to Brian. Absolutely perfect, I hope he didn't tell them anything about yesterday.
I replied to Hanna, promising to explain everything later if she has time to stop by at my place for coffee and I invited her to Sunday lunch. I will wait for her answer before replying to my mum.
I told Becca that I did see him at the club and tried to evade her questions by asking her if he works there.
Finally, I checked my missed calls. They were both from Hanna, from yesterday night, and today morning. No sign of Jake, then. I guess it's still early.
On the second thought, I don't think I even want him to call me. I don't want to think about him at all. The more I think about our moment yesterday, the more mortified I'm feeling.
I'm so angry at myself for letting him touch me like this on his goddamn office desk. What is wrong with me? Why can't I resist him, when I know he's seeing other women? This is ridiculous. And what was with his possessive character? Does he think he needs to take care of me in some way?
First, he's acting like an overprotective brother and then he almost fucks me on his desk. I don't know what is it with him and it's driving me crazy.
I need to forget all this happened, for Becca and Brian's sake if nothing else, and just move on from the mess we've made.
Three hours later of me obsessing and checking my phone every five minutes, Hanna finally arrives at my place. The little bugger looks refreshed like she had a few good hours of beauty sleep behind her. And I look like, well, like I drank half of the bar just hours ago. Life is not fair.
I've ordered Chinese and we sit down on my couch and start eating. She's looking over at me anxiously and I know she will explode soon if she doesn't ask.
"Just say it Han, what do you want to know?" A small smile playing on my lips.
She almost spits half of the food, while trying to get her questions out of her mouth. I start laughing without understanding anything that she said, and she laughs even harder, throwing a pillow at me.
When we manage to calm down, she repeats her question. "What is happening with you and Jake that I don't know about, and what the hell happened with you yesterday? You could at least call me when you got home." She looks at me with a small frown.
I take a deep breath, knowing I'll have to explain everything to her.
"Well, you remember that time when we were at my sister's place and Jake was also there?"
She nods, her eyes getting bigger with expectation for what is about to come. She just loves a good drama.
So, I explained everything from our conversation in front of Becca's building to yesterday's events in the club. I didn't let anything out, because I really needed to hear someone else's perspective if I'm losing my mind.
When I finished my story, I didn't like the growing concern in her eyes that converted from the initial excitement.
"Jess, it sounds like you have a ton of attraction and clearly both of you want to explore it, but are you sure you won't get hurt? I mean, the guy is screaming one-night stand. If this is where your head is, I'd say go for it. Seriously, the guy is delicious. But after Scott, I don't know if this is the smartest thing."
She practically spoke up all of my insecurities, and I knew she was right. I don't have feelings for him, obviously, I barely know him. But the way my body responds to him, with such intensity, I'm afraid to explore things further. I don't want to end up getting hurt again.
"Well, he didn't contact me today anyway, so I guess this ends the dilemma if we will continue anything or not. Which I know is for the best."
I glanced at my phone the last time, seeing there are no messages and it was already close to 7 pm. So, I guess this is it. I can pretend through my sister's wedding and forget all about him later. It's only a few months left till then.
"How about you, Miss Being-All-Secretive? What happened with your date that you oh-so-casually forgot to mention?" I give her a pointed look and she rolls her eyes on a huff.
"Well, since you asked, I enjoyed our date. A lot in fact." She started chewing her lip. "We met three times since and the last time things got pretty heated and we almost ended up at his place. But then he got a mysterious call, excused himself and I didn't hear from him since. This was five days ago. I don't know what happened, I really felt like we were getting along."
"Hey, don't be like this. It's his loss if he let you go. Plus you don't know what actually happened. Maybe you should text first, see where things are. At least you won't be beating yourself up that you didn't try." I give her a sympathetic smile and she nods, deciding she will do just that tomorrow.
We hung out a bit more, drank hot cocoa, and watched stupid t.v. shows. When Hanna left, I talked with my mum for a few minutes, letting her know we'll be coming for lunch tomorrow and then decided to take another shower and snuggle with my favourite book in my bed.
I was a book worm since I was a kid and I liked reading all kinds of books as long as the plot line was good enough to suck me in. But no matter what, I was a sucker for romance novels and today was as good as any day to read something steamy with a good dosage of cheesy, just to keep my mind from the mystery someone and the goddamn phone that kept quiet the whole evening.
At around 10 p.m., I started drifting off to sleep, so I've closed the book and covered myself with the soft blanket, ready to sleep off the remains of a hangover. I was already hovering between dreaming and awake-like state, when a beep from my phone pulled me out of my dreamy state.
I've reached for it to put it on silent when I saw I got a message from an unknown number. My heart made a big thud in my chest.
*I know you think I forgot about you... I didn't. Had some urgent matters to take care of. How about lunch tomorrow? Say... 1 p.m.? Jake *
My heart picked up its pace and I was suddenly completely awake. What should I respond to this? I'm not doing lunch, that's for sure.
* I already have lunch plans for tomorrow. Good night, Jake. *
I decided not to comment on the first part of his message, and I really intended on dismissing him after everything that happened. His reply came after a few seconds.
* Dismissing me so quickly? Where are your manners, Miss Cavanagh? :) How about just coffee in the morning? We need to talk. *
I didn't want to think about the butterflies in my stomach when reading his cheeky response. He's a charming bastard and he knows it.
* Fine, coffee. We do need to talk. Where? *
It took him a few minutes to reply this time and I was already thinking he got elsewhere distracted. I didn't like where my mind was going. Since when do I care what he does and who he does it with?
After 5 minutes, I get a reply.
* I'll pick you up at 9 ;). Don't make me wait for you. I'll come up and drag you down if needed. Looking forward, Jessica. Sweet dreams. *
I was staring at my phone and rereading his answer 3 times in a row. A rush of adrenaline went through my veins while thinking I will see him in the morning. Yep, I was screwed.
* Bossy much? I will try to be on time ;). Night.*
Needless to say, I was tossing and turning for two hours, trying to go through multiple scenarios of how this will go tomorrow. I wandered to sleep at around 1 a.m. with the image of us skipping coffee and him taking me roughly on my kitchen table. Yep, utterly and completely screwed.
---
I was exhausted when my alarm clock woke me up at 8 a.m., but as soon as I recalled all the messages from yesterday evening and my dirty dreams/fantasies, I was wide awake in an instant. I got up, took a shower, brush my teeth, and prepared hot water to make my dosage of green tea.
I wandered into my bedroom to get dressed. I was standing in front of my closet, realizing I have no idea what to wear. I didn't know where he was taking me.
In the end I decided to put on black skinny jeans that complimented my figure, a light pink sweater, and a stylish black leather jacket since you could really feel the winter pressing around the corner. I kept my makeup light and natural, not trying to give the impression I was putting more effort into this than necessary. Even though I was.
The time said 8:45 by the time I finished and I was sipping my tea while waiting for Jake to come.
Exactly on time, my phone started ringing, his name on the screen. I grabbed my purse, put on my ankle boots, and head down. He was waiting outside my building, leaning on his car. He was driving a BMW, the same to the one that took me home the other night.
He looked gorgeous. He was dressed casually in dark jeans with a white T-shirt that was hugging his torso and a black jacket that he kept open so I could see his delicious body. His hair was a bit mussed and it gave away the look of 'I look hot without even trying'.
I had to mentally slap myself to stop checking him out, even though I secretly liked that he was assessing me just as much. And his eyes were shining appreciatively.
When I reached him, he surprised me by leaning in and pressing a small kiss to my cheek. Suddenly, I didn't feel that cold anymore at all.
"Good morning Jessica, hope you slept well. Ready to go?"
I mumbled my hello and nodded as he opened the passenger door for me.
"So, you are a gentleman after all."
He gave me a wicked grin that shot sparkles all the way down to my core and winked. He was too sexy for his own good; or mine for that matter. I was in so much trouble.
He pulled out on the street and started driving smoothly through the streets.
"So, where exactly are we going?"
"It's a surprise. You'll have to trust me on this one. But I promise you'll have a good time."
I thought about his answer for a bit and he turned his eyes on me to check on my response.
"It's hard to trust someone like you. But for the sake of my good mood this morning, I'll let you take control." I smiled at him, letting him know I wasn't trying to be bitchy.
Nonetheless, I didn't know why I was all of a sudden all flirty and smiling. I need to remember what kind of a guy he is and that our last encounter finished with him almost fucking me on his desk and then sent me home with his military-looking driver. Anyway, he wasn't offended at all. His mouth pulled in a big smile.
"Oh you have no idea; taking control is one of my specialties."
I felt my cheeks burn at his words. I looked out the window, trying to hide how my body reacted to his flirtiness.
The rest of the drive we spent in silence that was neither uncomfortable nor comfortable. After 15 minutes he finally pulled in front of a tall building. I stepped out and curiously checked my surroundings. I knew this was one of the nicer parts of the city, but as far as I knew this was an apartment complex, not restaurants.
He took my arm and led me towards the entrance. I stopped momentarily and looked at him with questioning eyes.
He shrugged, "I was thinking since we have to talk about things that are private, it would be more comfortable to do so having coffee on the terrace of my apartment. I promise I'll behave."
He gave me one of his winks again and I was in too much shock to even reply. Did he bring me to his place? What the f?
"Breathe, Jess. I'm not going to hurt you. You know Brian wouldn't be my best friend if I would be a hidden psycho. I just wanted to get an opportunity to talk to you alone. I think we have a lot to talk about, don't you?"
"I'm not scared, just took me by surprise. And I guess you are right, it is better we talk somewhere private."
I tried to play all cool and collected, but my insides were buzzing with excitement and a bit of anxiety. What does he expect from me? Or what do I want him to expect from me?