Chương 12: Heartache

The next day, Shi Lian decided to visit Atian again. No matter how much Meng Yao insulted her, she couldn't stop seeing Atian just like that. She loved him and when he needed her the most, how could she sit in her room? He had once said that even when they were just a few meters apart, he missed her very much. Even if she didn't know, he told her he always needed her.

Shi Lian had asked Wucheng for help and hearing how much desperate she sounded, Wucheng agreed. Wucheng had let her know that he and Meng Yao would be leaving for Hu Mansion to bring food for Atian and other essentials since he was instructed to stay in the hospital for a few days until his injuries were completely healed.

Shi Lian, for better safety, wore a mask. She chose to wear the dress that Atian had gifted her last year on their anniversary. She made her way, looking to her left, and right case, Meng Yao appeared from nowhere.

The way to Atian's room was clear luckily. She knocked on the door before entering since she noticed Atian was awake through the small hole.

"Yes?"

Shi Lian entered in and their eyes met. Just looking at him, made her heart swell and she had this urge to go and bury her face in his neck. Whenever she was stressed, Atian would embrace her.

But inside the room, his eyes didn't hold the same familiarity. He didn't smile when he saw her.

Shi Lian walked up to him, putting up one of the brightest smiles. "Atian" she spoke, "do you remember me?" She asked the question with so much hope, that when Atian shook her head, the glass of hope broke bitterly.

"You came yesterday as well?" he asked in his pleasant voice.

Shi Lian curled her fingers into fists and controlled the roaring tears making their way. "Yes."

"I think we know each other but... I cannot recall your name" he said innocently, "What's your name, Miss?"

She stood beside the bed. "Shi Lian." She had thought that hearing her name might result in him remembering her however, he remained foreign to her.

"Sorry, I cannot remember you. Can you tell me what our relationship is? Mom didn't mention you, nor did brother."

"I.... " a sob escaped from her mouth before she could control it. It was difficult. Utterly difficult to be near him but feel so distant from him. "I am your girlfriend."

Atian blinked, staring at her as if she had said it in a foreign language. "Atian! I am your girlfriend, Shi Lian! Why don't you remember me?" she cried.

I.... Girlfriend?" he frowned. "I can't remember... " He pressed his palm on his temples, trying to remember but nothing came. Shi Lian reached to hold his hands. She touched his face, making him look into her eyes.

"Atian, try to remember me, please. I'm Shi Lian, your Shi Lian" she spoke with raw vulnerability pleading with him.

"I... " he removed his hands from her, shifted in his place, and appeared tensed. "I don't... Know you. You... "

He hissed when a sharp pain erupted in his brain. Shi Lian panicked, asking if he was okay. He didn't look alright. He grunted, pressing his palms on his temples in a forced manner.

Shi Lian called the doctor and within seconds the doctor came along with two nurses.

He calmed him somehow giving him a sedative. Shi Lian felt guilty for making him frantic likes this. She worsened things for him. She shouldn't have put too much force on him to remember her but what else she could do? She was desperate for him to remember her.

"Miss Shi Lian, I advise you not to bring up any topic which would affect his brain. Putting too much pressure would result in him the bursting of nerve cells which ultimately leads to death. Mr. Atian needs time to heal."

"How long it will take for him to heal?"

"We cannot say anything. Amnesia is a condition where a patient can regain his memory within a few hours, days, weeks or even it takes years. Or it may be prolonged."

The doctor's words gave her no hope, it only made her more upset. Shi Lian left the hospital and went to her home.

MO MANSION,

When Sha Sha came into her room, her eyes widened when she saw a suitcase packed with Shi Lian's clothes. "Where are you going, Shi?"

"You are not aware, Mother?"

Sha Sha took a moment and then she realized what she was talking about. "You have agreed to go to the US?" Zheng Yuan had briefly let her know about his decision to send Shi Lian away from here for her betterment. Sha Sha wasn't expecting Shi Lian to agree since her mind was revolving around Atian.

Shi Lian nodded with a faint smile. Upon looking, Sha Sha notices how dull Shi Lian looked. Her lovely daughter has no shade of joy on her face the way she used to.

"Oh, Shi...." Sha Sha gets emotional and reaches to hug her daughter.

"Atian's condition will only get worse if he tries to remember me. It's better I leave and focus on my career instead" Shi Lian said, but it took her much courage to speak it. She had thought about it carefully. Well, she didn't have any other choice left. Even if she wished to stay, her father wouldn't allow it and what would she even do by staying here? Meng Yao didn't want her anywhere near Atian and Atian doesn't remember her at all. It was better to leave this place than live like a ghost.

"I'm proud of you, my daughter... And I will miss you so much!"

"I know, mother. I will miss you too." Sha Sha helped Shi Lian with packing and soon after an hour, it was done.

It was around seven in the evening when Zheng Yuan arrived from the company. His first question was about Shi Lian. He was worried if Shi Lian would agree to his decision or not.

"I have packed my things," said Shi Lian, coming downstairs. That made Zheng Yuan surprised but he was glad to hear it.

"You are doing the right thing, Shi Lian. Trust us, this is for your good."

Shi Lian gave a tight smile and after they had dinner, Shi Lian went to her room. She was anxious because tomorrow morning she would be leaving for America. She wouldn't see Atian and the thought made her heart clench.

Without thinking, she dialed Wucheng's number. "Hello, Wucheng brother?"

"Is everything alright, Shi Lian?"

"Y-yes it is. I just want to ask about Atian's condition. The doctor said there is no prediction of when his memories will be back. Is it only me that he doesn't remember?"

"Yes, the doctor had informed us as well. When Atian first woke up, he didn't remember any of us. Not even Mom. But after a while, Atian slowly accepted. I don't know the reason why he doesn't remember you, however, you shouldn't lose hope, Shi Lian. Soon, Atian will regain his memory."

"I wish that too, brother. But.... " she paused and took a deep breath before she let him know about her departure. "I am going abroad tomorrow."

"What?" he asked, shocked.

"Yes."

"Shi, if this is because of my Mom then please you don't have to. I know my Mom's words were harsh but deep down she does love you."

"No, brother. I am not leaving because of what Aunt Yao said. I think I should take my time and focus on my life instead. My parents are worried and I don't want to burden them."

"I see. If you have made your decision, I won't stop you. All I can say is, be happy and stay healthy."

"Thank you" she spoke, her voice wobbling. Saying goodbye, she ended the call, and closed her eyes, letting her tears fall silently.