Chương 10: Black
This chapter was edited on October 9, 2018
A/N: Heyo so I always thought this chapter was really cringey because I wrote it when I was, like, eleven lmao. I'm 19 now and realize this chapter is kind of cringey, but a lot of people think it's cute so I'll just leave this here.
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The next day they were back in the carriage.
It was just brent and Lucas this time since King Michael had gone back home to do whatever kings do.
It was quite awkward for Brent, especially after their "purple" discussion. Brent somehow felt even more self-conscious around the prince than before. It was like anytime the prince looked at him, he thought, "Do I look okay?"
Or anytime Lucas accidentally brushed against him, Brent thought, "Is he trying to brush up against me on purpose?"
It was as if ever since Prince Lucas found out he was bisexual, anything the prince did that was directed towards Brent would flare a sign of hope into his heart.
And hope was a dangerous thing.
He looked at Prince Lucas sat in front of him who had his eyes closed, head leaned back peacefully. He hummed a nursery rhyme that Brent vaguely remembered his dad singing before he died.
Brent cleared his throat, causing Lucas to open one eye.
"Are we gonna go back soon?" He asked, "In case you haven't noticed, I still have a wedding menu to make. I don't even know the delicacies of Lacigam."
"I'll have some people work on it with you, don't you worry your chiseled little head about anything." The prince replied calmly.
"You think I'm chiseled, ay?"
Lucas blushed "W-well that's not what I was-"
"I've heard of that song you were singing just now," Brent told him, trying to distract himself from the prince's cute blush.
The question caught Lucas off-guard. "What?"
"That song," the chef repeated, "what was it called?"
"Oh," Lucas nodded, "It's just a tune my mother used to sing to me to get me to sleep. For some reason, I woke up singing it and it's been stuck in my head ever since"
"That's what you were humming yesterday."
Lucas looked slightly embarrassed "Yeah well..."
Brent grinned, "I guess it's a Charming thing to be able to sing, right?"
Lucas suddenly looked at his chef in surprise. Did Brent really just say that?
"You think I can sing?"
The question came out a bit more hopeful than expected. For some reason, Lucas wanted at least one compliment from Brent. He was not, however, expecting the next thing that came out of the young chef's mouth.
"Of course you can sing, you have a beautiful voice"
Lucas felt a tingle run from his feet to his ears. He knew his face was red but he couldn't hide the contentment on his face.
"Thank you" he sat quietly, putting his head down to try and hide his smile.
Soon the journey was quiet once again and the boys both closed their eyes with heads back, enjoying the sounds of the horses galloping and the carriage wheels lurching forward. Unconsciously, Lucas started to sing. This time with the lyrics.
"Little child,
no need for fright.
Black is not,
the shade of night.
Mourning, weeping,
souls retreating
Black soul demon,
Close your eyes."
It was a song about death; accepting it, embracing it, and becoming one with it.
The song had several more dreary verses but it didn't go at a painfully slow, funeral march. It was actually kind of cheerful if you didn't listen to the lyrics.
I wonder if he thinks of his mother when he sings that song, Brent thought.
Brent's heart broke every time they talked about Lucas's mother. Lucas just seemed so fragile, like a child.
"Little child,
so frail and small"
It seemed like everyone and everything could knock the prince down a peg. Sort of like him, he supposed. Of course he, on the other hand, didn't show this vulnerability. Even though he knew he felt the same way, maybe even more. Both of them were obviously hiding their terrible pasts.
"forever hiding
Thy dark soul"
It was no secret that they both knew death. And it was not kind to them in return.
"Mourning, weeping
Souls retreating"
They really were the same. Forced to shut out anything dark and evil from within their minds. Conceal all of their dark memories, so that they could move on in life.
"Black soul demon
Close your mind"
Lucas tried hard not to talk about this song. In a sense, he knew it represented him perfectly. He knew deep down he wasn't a bad person
"Little child
With heart of gold"
And he knew that he had an unfair life. He was well aware of how his brothers were always first picked for everything and not him. Everything he'd ever wanted to do or had accomplished was never anything major because his brothers probably did it first. He was given whatever his brothers didn't do and was told he had to master it. Like a mutt been given scraps of leftover's bones.
"Treated poorly
lo and behold"
No matter how much of that heart of gold he had, he knew sorrow all too well. Years and years of crying and sleepless nights.
"mourning, weeping,
Souls retreating."
In truth, sometimes the prince blamed himself. He always felt as if he let people in too easily, like how he had quickly grown so close to Brent. Like how much of his love he gave his mother. That love made him into the dark, depressing thing he was now.
"Black soul demon
Close your heart."
In the end, both boys knew that they had lived sorrowful lives. They knew that their lives had been a living hell at one point, and yet they were both so happy. Maybe it was just being in each other's presence that made them remember these things. Maybe it was being in each other's presence that made them happy.
"Little child
Haven't you said:
'thoughts of darkness
Fill my head'?
You've mourned, you've wept
Those souls that left
black soul demon
who is dead?"
They both knew what the last verse meant. Who is really dead? Not those whose souls left from their body, but those who were actually dead. Inside.
They had both been the Black Soul Demon once. Perhaps with each other, they wouldn't have to be anymore.
***
Here's the full song, if you want to listen to it without interruptions:
Little child,
no need for fright.
Black is not,
the shade of night.
Mourning, weeping,
souls retreating
Black soul demon,
Close your eyes.
Little child,
so frail and small"
forever hiding
Thy dark soul
Mourning, weeping
Souls retreating
Black soul demon
Close your mind
Little child
With heart of gold
Treated poorly
lo and behold
mourning, weeping,
Souls retreating.
Black soul demon
Close your heart.
Little child
Haven't you said:
'thoughts of darkness
Fill my head'?
You've mourned, you've wept
Those souls that left
black soul demon
who is dead?
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