Chương 148: Chapter 148

TYRION LANNISTER POV

The smell of the shit, piss and rotten fish wafted to his nose and Tyrion would have known that he had arrived in Kings Landing even if his eyes were closed.

It was the worst smelling place in the 7 kingdoms after all.

In the port, he could see the smallfolk stop their work to stare at Titanic. He had a similar reaction when he had seen it the first time.

Even the largest ship in the Royal Fleet looked positively dwarfed in front of Titanic.

Their gaping faces and dropped jaws were expected.

But currently he paid little attention to them as he was far too lost in his own thoughts. It had been a common theme with him ever since Lord Bolton revealed the truth about Tysha to him. A truth that he realized that he had always known deep down in his heart but was too scared and too weak to face it.

Now he just need to meet his 'dear' brother and… and what? He didn't know. He frankly didn't know anything anymore.

Would he really discard his Lannister name and go live with his wife who probably both feared and hated him by now?

Despite all the hard choices he had faced in his entire life, this one was somehow harder than all the rest.

"We're here my lord." One of the sailors said and he noticed that the boat he was standing upon was now docked at the port.

He opened his mouth to say 'thank you' but found that his mouth was too dry to do such a thing. How long had been since he had last spoken? How long had it been since he had something to drink?

He wondered if people would call him Tyrion the Dwarf 'and' the Mute from now on.

In the end he just gave a nod to the sailor along with a gold coin and the sailor's face lit up in happiness.

He didn't attention to it. He didn't attention to anything as the two Lannister guards he had been assigned by his father as well as the 4 Bolton guards assigned by Lord Bolton for his safety followed behind him.

All he wanted to do now was go to the Red Keep and talk with him brother and find out the truth.

A truth that he already know.

Could he really do it?

Could he really go to the one person whom he had loved the most in the whole family. The one person who had always protected him from his cruel father and shielded him from their sister since he was a small child.

Could he really do this and then go on to hate his brother just as much as he hated his father and sister.

His feet halted in their place and indecision filled him.

Could he really do this?

He stood at the center of the cobbled path, looking at nothing in particular and living all the good memories he had of his brother.

But no matter what he did, the memories of his wife being raped would always taint is good memories with his brother.

How his brother had stood there and told him with a mischievous smile that all of that was for fun and that Tysha was just a whore that he had hired to make a man out of him.

The image of Tysha looking at him pleadingly as she was taken by the first men filled his mind. How the hope had left her eyes as he did nothing and just stood there.

Fresh tears started to roll down his cheeks and he was mystified by how he still had any tears left in him after all the crying he had been doing this past month.

'Would talking with Jamie even matter if you already know everything?' an insidious voice said in his mind 'Just be the coward you've always been and go to the whores instead. At least they would pretend to love you.'

For a moment, he almost listened to the voice. Confronting his brother was too hard as it was. He couldn't do it.

But then the image of Tysha came to his mind. How she had said that she loved him after the first time they slept together. And how radiant she had looked when he married her.

With a start he realized that he couldn't take another step toward any of the dozen expensive brothals in the city that he knew about.

Great! 'Now' he remembers all the oaths he had taken the day he had married Tysha. After he had broken them a thousand times already.

Why was he only remembering all of this now? Why couldn't he have remembered it when Tysha was raped at his father's orders. Why did his brother lie to him. Why did he believe his brother's false words. Why didn't he protect Tysha with his life. Why? Why? Why?

He clenched his fists and wiped his eyes.

Why was he always so weak? Why did he have to kill his mother when he came out in this world? Why he born a dwarf? Why was…

He was brought out of his thoughts as he heard the sound of footsteps coming toward him and looked up to notice that a well dressed and well armored man was standing a few feet from him.