Those bitten by the snakes back on the plane were given immediate medical attention and administered the antivenom once they were off the plane. It was quite the scare overall, but miraculously, nobody died from snake venom.
When I was certain we were in the clear after we got off the plane, I fell back on a couch in relief. I'd just gone with the flow, I wasn't given a single opportunity to grasp the situation or catch my breath thanks to panic that followed the sudden announcement over the intercom.
"Val, I never want to go on a plane ever again. Planes are freaking scary. If this was what happened this time, then next time the plane will undoubtedly crash on a deserted island."
"Stop being such a baby, it was just a one-off."
"A one-off you say? A one-off! Snakes on a freaking plane is a one-off!"
"Yeah, it's just a freak accident of sorts." Even she looked skeptical when she said that.
"What about that shitty movie?"
"Mr. Genovese, we don't talk about it. No, nobody talks about it, so just forget that abomination ever existed."
I let out a long sigh, I really never imagined we'd ever talk to each other like this again after that terrible nightmare.
"Val, why didn't you wake me up sooner? You always do this."
"I tried this time, but you were out like a log."
"Fine. Whatever... it's alright I guess. I'm just glad you're still with me in one piece."
"You had another nightmare, right? What was it about this time?"
"Haha. I guess you could say... terrorists, snakes, and a ghost walked into a plane?"
"That's a rather interesting combination."
"It's really not. It was the worst."
"Well, where's the punchline?"
"It wasn't a joke, I was being serious."
"Then make a joke out of it. I'm in the mood for a good laugh."
I was speechless, did she think I was a stand-up comedian?
"Okay, I have a really spooky joke for you."
"Oh? Do you really?"
"It's awful, so don't get your expectations up."
"Go ahead, I'm listening."
"A snake slithers onto a plane with a hiss. A ghost immediately tries to scare it, but the snake doesn't quite understand the meaning behind the ghost's actions and only looks on utterly baffled. Caught in the crossfire of the ghost's failed attempt to scare the snake, the ghost inadvertently scares the terrorists instead. What do you think the terrorists' first words were?"
"Oh? I don't know, what were they?"
"I KEEl you."
Val blinked a few times clearly not comprehending where the joke was. I awkwardly cleared my throat and reenacted the scene.
"The snake said ssssss, the ghost said boo, and the terrorists said KEEl, it was very sssbookee, get it? Didn't I say it was a really spooky joke?"
Val facepalmed so hard I heard the cringe as it rattled through every single bone in her body, but she still couldn't hide the vaguely visible embarrassed to be smiling smile formed by her slightly arched up lips.
"Mr. Genovese, that was pretty bad after all. Please stick to your day job and never enter the world of stand-up comedy."
"I told you it would be bad."
"I didn't think it would be awful enough to make even gods and devils cringe down to their bones."
"What the hell other joke could I possibly make out of those three things anyway?"
"Anything but that please."
I was slightly disgruntled that my path toward becoming the Comedic King was suddenly barred from my future prospects just based upon one bad joke, but I suppose I'd live even without such a stupid title. Either way, with Val's assistance, it didn't take long before I'd calmed down and cooled my head off. Telling that terrible joke on the spot helped me relax.
"Thanks again Val, there are really times where I don't know what I would do if you weren't around."
"Don't worry about it. I have to take good care of all my employees' health after all."
Now that I'd calmed down to a certain degree, I sat up straight from my slouched position and examined the area around the exit terminal. When my eyes landed on one individual in particular, I nearly leaped out of my seat.
"Val... why... is our taxi driver... dressed up as the pilot?"
"Taxi driver? What are you talking about? That person IS the pilot; he's not dressed as one."
"No way, our pilot was an aged looking veteran, definitely not that guy who looks like it's his first job!"
"Dio, I think you're still a bit confused right now. Our taxi driver was the aged looking veteran you're talking about, he definitely wasn't young like this pilot."
I looked directly into Val's eyes, but there were no visible signs that indicated she'd lied to me.
"That's not possible!"
I got up then rushed over to the pilot and grabbed onto his collar like a mad man, "You! You were my taxi driver on the way to the airport, right? Why are you dressed as a pilot now!"
"Sir, please calm down. We've definitely never met before, nor have I ever driven a taxi in my life."
"What are you talking about? Stop lying to me! You were my taxi driver on two occasions!"
"Dio! Calm down! He's really telling the truth, you even saw him when we first entered the airplane."
That can't be possible, I saw the pilot two times, there's no way I could be mistaken. Once when I first boarded the plane and the second when the terrorists in that nightmare displayed his decapitated head in the cabin.
Val grabbed my hand, separated us, and stood in between. She lowered her head then said, "Sorry, my employee was bitten when he took a snake bite to protect me back on the plane. It appears his memories are a bit shaken up as an after effect, please forgive us, he didn't mean any harm."
"No, Miss, please forgive us. It is the airline's responsibility to ensure our passengers have a comfortable stress free flight. We will be refunding all passengers for this flight. All passengers from this flight will also receive a free all-inclusive night at our airport's five-star hotel in addition to a free flight on their next trip with us. We sincerely apologize for the hectic situation and we hope this one blunder doesn't dissuade you from flying with us in the future."
"It's really alright, it's not your sole fault as the pilot, so don't take it too hard. We'll be taking our leave now though."
"Thank you for your understanding and forgiveness."
The guy really looked remorseful over the situation. I felt bad for attacking him out of the blue the way I had, but I was just too baffled as to why the taxi driver had suddenly turned into the pilot. It wasn't like it was a world toppling change, but it felt like a piece to a much bigger puzzle had somehow been revealed to me completely out of the blue.