Chương 36: Never Go Back
A month later, Elaine called Pain into her office. She sat there, thinking about what to say, the warped paint on the floor turning into creatures that would point and laugh at her, saying she failed in her head.
Pain walked in, she could see him from the corner of her eye.
"What is it, my lady?" He got on to one knee and kneeled.
"I can't continue this." Her body was hot with regret and embarrassment.
"Continue what?" Pain looked up at her, confusion plain to see on his face.
"Our relationship. I've tried and tried to continue it, but it's just not enough, not what I want. I wanted Hex. You used to be him, but heaven… Changed you. You aren't the person I thought you'd be, after you came back. I can't keep acting like I'm happy in this relationship." She shook her head slowly, tears clouding her vision.
"Elaine, I…" Pain slowly stood up.
"Don't say it, I know you'll say you can act like who you were before, but I'd rather neither of us lie and end it here than continue to lie for either me or you." She looked up at him, tears slowly making her way down her face.
"Does this mean… We're cutting all contact?" Pain looked genuinely sad.
"No, we can still be friends, co-workers as well, I'm not kicking you out of Macabre Hearse, you are still my Knight, I won't take that from you," she said as she wiped her tears.
"Oh thank god, I was worried I was being kicked out, I have no place to go but Purgatory, which I still haven't made a bedroom for, I'd rather not sleep on the floor." He wiped his forehead, visibly relieved.
"I wouldn't kick you out, you tried to give me what I wanted, you did all you could to make me happy, I just… I have a type, you know?" She frowned.
"I guess you go for more of the bad boy type." Pain shrugged.
"I guess so." She sighed.
She knew faking affection was bad for the relationship, she wanted Pain to be Hex so badly, but she felt like he was an alien to her now. She thought she could finally be with the man she loved, but it turned out that he was completely different, she knew she couldn't be satiated by who Pain had become. She realized he was incompatible with her romantically.
Later, she went to her room and cried into her pillow. She was so ashamed she told Hex about her and Pain's relationship, and it falling through would just give him fodder to hurt her with. She hoped and prayed that Hex wouldn't rub it in her face, and that he would be a better person than that, but she wasn't so sure, he hated her, so she feared the worst. The only love she ever knew was gone, and without Pain's love, she didn't know what to do.
Read the rest of the book here: https://www.moonquill.com/book/113
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