บท 550: Alternates

"That guy managed to kick Cuckashi and Rei out of our own bus!?" Saya angrily asks, confused at why they didn't just beat the crap out of him and dump him outside with his brainwashed lackeys.

"Yeah, the plot isn't very smart... Or Takashi and Rei are just idiots... I mean, who just wanders off alone in a zombie apocalypse because they hate someone in the group?"

"No one in this Anime is very smart... Saya included." Megumin remarks, drawing a glare from said pinkette. "The only person I like in this is that nurse who looks like Tiff."

"Shizuka Marikawa. Come to think of it, we didn't get to see her much did we?" Michael mutters, the woman had been concentrating on healing the injured and spending time with her girlfriend.

"Hmmm, Tiff spend enough time with her... You were acting like mother and daughter." the explosion girl adds.

"Well, she reminds me a lot of my mother, and Miss Shizuka is very... Handsy" Tiffania states.

"He, nice." Michael grins, getting a slap from Lillith in response.

"Don't be a pervert..."

"I'm not being a pervert... Just think about it, a Tiffania and Shizuka sandwich-ouch! Okay! Okay! I'll stop!" he laughs as his sister hammers into him with weak punches.

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Michael and everyone else stares with wide eyes at the legendary boob shot scene, Cuckashi using Rei's boobs as a stabiliser and firing bullets that go between Saeko's legs and boobs... All with the camera tracking said shots of course.

"Wow..."

...

"Just wow..."

"Nice show you've got here, Saya-san." Megumin mocks with a huge grin. The scene they just watched was so ridiculous, and so close to being pornographic that Michael and Saya were struggling not to categorize this as a Hentai show...

"H-how could Anime watch and enjoy this? How could this happen in reality? I-I can't believe this would have happened, I refuse to believe it!"

"Well, I enjoyed it..." Michael chuckles, "

"Of course you would, harem-protagonist-scum."

"Funny how you're not included in the best scene in the show." he retorts, causing her to glare.

"I-Is this normal for 'modern entertainment'?" Tiffania can't help but ask.

"Er... Let's keep watching shall we?"

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"*Gasp* Mama, Papa..." Saya utters in horror as she sees her parents die at the hands of the zombies, simply because that piece of shit Shido decided to sabotage everything!

"Don't worry Saya, this isn't real, remember? Your parents are fine." Tiffania consoles her with a hug.

...

"Y-you're right... I-it's just horrifying that this would've been my future without Michael..."

Tiff smiles, "Yes, without him all of our lives would've been worse."

"Gee, you're making me blush." Michael jokes despite the hint of red on his cheeks. Lillith grips his hand tightly and leans into him, showing her own appreciation.

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"So, I eventually end up with Kohta?" Saya asks as they near the end of the Anime. Their relationship was explicitly stated, but it was heavily hinted at.

"What? Don't think he's good enough for you?" Michael questions.

"No... Well, not his on-screen version. But the version we saw when we visited? I could see myself liking him..." she admits before shaking her head, "I've had enough of viewing this 'not-future'."

Tiffania nods, "Lets watch my world then... I want to see what would've been..."

Michael loads up Familiar of Zero, and the group immediately notice the differences...

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"So, this 'Saito' person was the protagonist before Michael took his place?" Megumin questions curiously.

"Yeah, got the runes to show for it and everything." Michael confirms while showing his Gandalfr runes.

"And yet I got the useless chest tattoo." Megumin pouts after seeing Saito easily defeat Guiche.

"Yeah, I actually ended up killing Guiche here with magic... It was stupid but I wasn't really thinking straight..."

"Looks like he deserved it anyway." Saya shrugs dismissively.

"Maybe, but I got imprisoned immediately after and forced to escape... Louise... She didn't have the best time with my absence... She would've been better off with Saito instead of me." Michael sheepishly admits...

Louise and everyone else in that world were probably dead at the hands of the ancient dragon anyway, so regretting it all now was redundant.

"So, you replaced the protagonist and almost immediately threw away the female lead..." Saya chuckles, "Was it because she didn't suit your tastes?"

Michael sighs, "Yeah, I don't think pink hair looks good on anyone..."

"Wait a minute... Is this who you were comparing me to way back then!? We're nothing alike!" Saya exclaims upon connecting the dots.

Everyone just sends a silent look at her at this.

"Well, let's just see..." Michael says, beginning to count his fingers, "Rich, dismissive parents. Pink hair. Tsundere attitude. Inferiority complex despite thinking she's smarter than everyone else... The list goes on and on..."

...

"Heh, see that Saya? Plus that girl's a Void Mage like Tiff, the only thing you beat her in is boob-size!" Megumin can't help but voice.

"Grr, I'M NOT LIKE HER! YOU'RE ALL BEING RIDICULOUS!"

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"Princess Henrietta... She killed herself during the time of our departure..." Tiffania sadly states as the scene with the princess plays.

"It was out of our hands... We're not responsible for the fate of everyone even if someone in our place would've done something... God could have stepped in if he wanted, but he didn't, so why should we?" Michael says, though, he wasn't very convincing in his reasoning.

"That just sounds like an excuse to make yourself feel better..." Saya remarks.

Michael shrugs in response, "It probably is, I try not to think about all the ways I've failed... I wasn't really strong enough, physically or mentally back then to do anything meaningful. At that time I was sneaking around a port city struggling to survive..."

"Was it hard, big bro?" Lillith quietly asks.

He nods, "It was, but I made it out okay didn't I?"