บท 3: Chapter 2: I Am Sorry
I ate a bit, as I was in fact quite a bit hungry as I don't remember all that much from last night, as it was really late that I had stayed up, and I had drank far too much than I normally did, as I was certain that I had at least 15 or 20 drinks, which was normal for an orc to take in that much of a drink in simply just one night, as orcs were well known to be heavy drinkers of all of the other races of the lands.
I felt quite a bit bad for it, for one thing, due to the fact that it was very late that I had come back home, as I was so drunk, as I was fairly certain that I had in fact woken my father up, which I knew probably had upset him a bit, though he had not said any thing at all to me about it, as I knew that he did not want to hurt my feelings. I knew as to why he did not want to do so either, as I knew how bad it was when ever an orc was angry, as I had been told more than just one time from a lot of different people none the less.
I would say that I would not be like the rest, but I had out breaks in the past, as I had never hurt any one, but I had broke quite a few things at the exact same time too, and that was even back when I was a much smaller orc, as I had been doing my best to try to take control of my anger as of late, so that I did not let it go to out of hand for me at the exact same time as well, none the less.
I sighed just a bit at the exact same time too, as I some times wished that I had not been born an orc. A lot of people said that I was lucky, as I was strong, and there was a lot things that I could do, that a normal human could not do. I did not not view it as lucky how ever, as for one thing, I hated the fact that it seemed like every one treated me a lot different than a human, which I suppose I could not blame them for at all, but it still did not mean that it did not hurt me at all.
I shook off all of those thoughts all at once, at the exact same time as well, as I looked back over at my father, to see as to what it was that he was doing at this very moment in time any ways, as I saw that he had his eyes on the sink, as I then remembered that before I had come in to the kitchen, to eat a bit of some good old breakfast from him, that he had been cleaning out all of the dishes that had been left out on the table, or had been left in the sink.
I felt quite a bit bad, as I knew that I was quite a bit lazy in that aspect, but at the exact same time too, I figured that I should not be all too worried about that at the exact same time too, as I looked over through the window that was right at the kitchen sink, as I saw that it was no longer dawn, and I felt like I needed to go to the place that I had told my friends to meet me at, as I was certain that I was going to be late at this point, no matter how fast I was to walk.
Orcs were a lot slower than a human, as I had learned that at this point, as my friends used to mess around with me when I was a lot younger, as to the fact that I could never catch up to them, as I was quickly out of breath, and also the fact that I was a lot bigger than a human was, so I had a lot more weight on me when ever it was that I was to move around. With that weight how ever, I knew at the same time too, came pure strength, so that was not any thing to complain about.
I dipped my head a bit low to the ground at the exact same time too, as I knew that there was a lot of things that I could do with all of that strength, but I had not done a damn thing about any of it just yet, as I seemed to be happy, and content with living off my father for the time being. I knew that he was fine with it as well, as he was always worried about me going out in public for one thing, but I really was not all too worried about that at this point in my life, as I knew that I needed to get a job at some point soon.
I breathed in heavily all at once, as I felt like I should worry about that a little bit later, as I remembered all of the sudden at the same time as well, as to what it was that I had been trying to do in the very first place any ways, as it all of the sudden all came back to me. I blinked my eyes just a few times, as I then turned my head over to the front door all of the sudden, as I then began to curse my self for being such an idiot, and seeming to forget things that I had planned on doing so easily.
"Damn it! I've got to go!" I said to my self, a bit quietly, but loud enough for my father to hear, as what I seemed to view as quiet, was not quiet at all clearly, as I saw that my father turned his head over to me, a bit lost as to the reason that I was cursing to badly, and so loudly right at the very moment in time any ways, as I saw him tilt his head a bit at me. I rolled my eyes at him just a little bit, feeling like I really did not need to explain it to him, as he already knew where it was that I was going right now.
I sighed a bit of a heavy sigh to my self all at the exact same time as well, as I then all of the sudden, all at the exact same time as well, then began to head over to the front door, so that I could get over to the place that I had planned on going over to in the very first place any ways, as I still felt like quite a bit of an idiot for the fact that I had been too lazy to get out of bed, and how I had forgot several times as to what it was that I was doing in the first place.
Even if my memory was bad, due to the fact that I was in fact an orc, I felt like what it was that I was planning on doing today, was some thing that I for sure should not have forgot about, as I knew that it was very important, I knew that it was very special to me, as a bit of a smile then all of the sudden began to crack up on my face, as all of the thoughts of the girl that I was in love with for some odd reason or another, which was of course, Kimberly too, then suddenly began to come up in to my head.
I suppose that there was a good reason actually, as to the reason that I was in love with her, as I knew that it was not an odd reason at all, as she was the best person to ever treat me as to the way that I was, and she was the nicest and most loving person that I had ever met as well. I just had to keep a bit of some sort of faith, that things were going to work out for me, and she in fact too was in love with me, even if I was an ugly orc.
I shook off all of those thoughts all at the exact same time as well how ever, as I then opened the door that was in front of me, and my eyes locked on to the world that was out side, and the world that I saw all around me at this very moment in time, as it was quite a beautiful one if I was not going to lie, as there was a lot of trees. I loved trees, as some one had once told me that I would be good as a lumber man, but I had scoffed at them for saying such a thing, as I did not want to take down trees at all, as I viewed trees as one of the most beautiful things to ever see.
I wonder if any of that might be due to the fact that I was an orc, but at the exact same time as well, I shook my head, as I shook off all of those thoughts all at once as well, as I knew that I had to stop calling my self an orc, as I knew that if I did not want other people to treat me differently, than I had to make sure that I did not treat my self different than all of the others. I felt a bit sick as to what it was that orcs did to humans, and I felt like I should do my best to not act like the rest of my species either.
I nodded a bit to my self, as I then shook off all of those thoughts all at the exact same time as well, all of the sudden, as I then began to head out on the edge of the streets, where I could see a lot of people walking all around me right now. Though I knew a lot of the people that I saw, due to the fact that I had lived out in this area of the city for my entire life, I still did in fact notice that once again, all of the humans that were all around me right now, did in fact treat me differently than every one else, as I saw that a lot of them began to shy away from me, as it was clear that they did not want to get any where near me.
I dipped my head a bit low to the ground, as I felt quite a bit bad about my self for seeing every one do that to me, any time that I got any where near them, but I suppose that I could not blame them, as I was sure that they would not want to get any where near me either, if I was a human as massive as I was right now. I rolled my eyes just a little bit, as I let out quite a bit of a soft sigh at the exact same time as well, as I then kept on going through the streets, over to the park that I knew that I had told my friends to meet up with me at, that was not all too far away from me right now.
I could see the trees poking out through the diner that I some times ate at from time to time. I nodded a bit to my self, as I rolled my eyes to my self at the exact same time as well, as I was not all too sure as to what else it was that I might have thought that I was going to see there. I shook my head, as I shook off all of those thoughts once again how ever, as I made sure that there were no carriages going past this area in the streets, which there usually was not, due to the fact that not many people lived in the rich area of the city, which of course was the area that I grew up in, as I knew that a lot of people were jealous of me for it.
It was not just the fact that they were jealous as to the fact that my father was rich, but it was also the fact that they were jealous as to how strong that I was as well. I wish that I could tell them, and that they would listen as to the fact that the strength came with quite a bit of a price none the less, as I knew that every one treated me a lot differently than all of the other humans in the city, as it kind of made me feel quite a bit bad about my self as well.
I was used to it at this point how ever, as I felt like I should not be too down on my self, as I knew that it had been like that my entire life, and as long as I was to live in a human city, than it was going to stay that way. I just had to prove to all of them, that though I might be an orc, it did not mean that I was automatically a bad person, like the rest of the orcs, as I had been lucky to be born with a good father, as I felt like a lot of the reason that most orcs were not all that good, was simply due to the fact that they did not grow up in a good family, and they were taught that all of the humans were bad, and that they all should slaughtered.
Though at the exact same time too, I felt like I should not assume things like that about my own race, as that made me just like every one else. A part of me wanted to be like every one else, but at the exact same time too, I also kind of did not want to be like every one else, as I felt like I wanted to be my own person, and I wanted to have my own emotions, and own set of mind none the less as well. I blinked my eyes just a few times, as I felt like at the same time too, I really should not have my thoughts stuck on any of that right now any ways.
I sighed a bit to my self all at once, once again, as I then kept on heading all the way through the streets, as I walked over to the diner, as if I was about to walk in side. I had been tempted to do so as well, as I knew that I had a fair amount of money on me, and I did in fact kind of like the old lady that worked in side of there as well, as I knew that she was a very good person, and I knew that not only did a lot of people in the city strive to be her, but she was one of those humans that did not treat me differently than every one else did.
I was glad for it as well, but before I did in fact walk in to the diner, I then realized all of the sudden, that I was not hungry at all, due to the fact that I had just eaten not all too long ago, and also the fact that I knew that I needed to go and get to the park, so that I could go and meet all of my friends that I was fairly certain that they were waiting on me right now, even if I could not see them in the area that they were at, at this very moment in time, due to the fact that there were so many other humans in the area right now.
I shivered just a little bit to my self, as it all came back to me all at once as well, as to what it was that I was planning on doing in the first place. I did have a bit of a fear of rejection, as I hoped that it did not turn it in to a bit of a tantrum by me if that was in fact the case as well too, as I did my best to try to control my mood that was going through my right now, as I breathed in heavily, as I closed my eyes for just a few seconds all at the exact same time as well.
I gave my mind a few seconds to clear out all of the thoughts of the fact that I had any sort of fear on the fact that I was going to be rejected, as I knew that I had to come in to this with a bit of an open mind set, as the scared look that was on my face, which as I had been told was rare for an orc, as I had been told that they were not afraid of any thing at all, this was a bit different, as it did not have any thing to do with any sort of thing that was physical at all, as it was simply just fear of rejection, which I knew would hurt me mentally if that were in fact the case.
I opened my eyes, as I seemed to do a bit of a good job clearing all of my thoughts all at the exact same time too how ever, as I then all of the sudden began to head off in the direction that I was trying head on over to in the very first place any ways, as I then kept on going over past the diner, and over to the park, as I saw that as soon as a lot of the humans had seen me, they all seemed to veer away from me, as I could tell that all of them were quite a bit afraid of me.
I was tempted to growl at them, to scare them a bit, as I thought that it might be a bit funny to me, but I did not do such a thing how ever, as I felt like it could get me in a lot of trouble with the mayor of the city, as I was lucky that the man had let him in with my father in the very first place any ways. I was worried what would happen if the mayor was in fact to die, which I hoped would not be the case, as he was still around the age of my father, and he seemed to be in good health, and in good condition.
Not nearly as good as my father, but that was to be as expected, as my father was a lead man in the army, so it was quite a bit hard to be in nearly as good shape as him, as even if I was as strong as my father, I felt like he would still destroy me in a fight, as I was glad that he had never really challenged me to a friendly fight. For one thing, I was worried that I might actually get angry in that fight, and I might actually hurt my father, but also the other thing was the fact that I did not want to make a bit of a fool of my self.
I shivered just a bit all at once, as I felt like I should never say never about the mayor how ever, as you never knew when man could get sick, and their body just gave out on him. It was not any thing that I wished on him at all, as I knew that the mayor was a very good man, and that I was very lucky that he had let me in, in the very first place any ways. As I shook off all of those thoughts all at once, as I did not even want to think as to what it was that might happen to me, if another mayor was to in fact take over the city over the last mayor.
I breathed in a bit heavily, as I then shook off all of those thoughts all at once at the exact same time as well, and I then continued to head over to the area that I knew that my friends for sure we're waiting for me at this point, due to the fact that I could see that the sun was a fair bit high in the sky at this point, and I was sure that they were starting to get a bit frustrated on the fact that I still had not yet shown up, which I really did not blame them for at all, as I then began to quicken up my pace, which still did not feel like it mattered all too much, as I went over to the area of trees, that we always met up at.
The reason why we always met up there, was simply due to the fact that it was a nice looking area, next to the lake as well, that no one else in the park seemed to ever want to go to. I some times wondered if that were due to the fact that they knew that was where I stayed at, and they did not want to get any where near where an orc might have been. I shook off all of those thoughts once again, as I knew that I was getting my self back on the thoughts that I had been trying so hard to get my self off of earlier, as I knew that I needed to treat my self like the rest of the humans, if I expected them to treat me the same way.
I sighed just a bit to my self, as I then kept on getting closer and closer to the area that I knew that my friends were at now, as I could see a group of people there, though I could not see their exact faces, I knew that it only made sense that it would be them, due to the fact that no one else went in to that area in the park for one thing, and also that was of course the place that I had told them to meet me at in the first place any ways, just yesterday.
I dipped my head a little bit low to the ground all at once as well, as I was still quite a bit embarrassed as to the fact that I had been so late to the party, as I then walked right up on them, not daring to lock eyes with any of them right now. Once I was up at the edge of all of the trees, I then stared down at the ground for quite a bit of some time, as it seemed like it was just going to be dead silence, which I was perfectly okay with, for some odd reason or another as well.
It stayed that way for quite a bit of some time, as I did not hear a single word, nor did I hear any one whispering to one another, about how I was the one that was late when I had been the one that had made the plans in the very first place any ways. As at first I thought that it was going to stay silent for ever, I then heard the voice of my best friend, Ashton Williams.
I blinked my eyes just a few times, but after a little while longer, I did in fact lift my head up to him, to hear as to what it was that he had to say to me in the very first place any ways. I saw that he had a bit of an upset look on his face, as to the fact that I had to assume was the reason that they had all been waiting on me, but I shook off all of those thoughts all at once how ever, as I then began to listen to what it was that he had to say to me in the very first place any ways.
"What the hell Zin? We've been out here waiting on you for ever now!" He said to me, as I could tell that he was not all too happy with the fact that I had not got here as soon as I had said that I was going to. In fact, I was sure that I might have got here quite a bit of some time late, as I had told every one to be here by the end of dawn, and we were a fair bit past that point now, as I felt quite a bit guilty as to the fact that I had left every one waiting on me. I dipped my head quite a bit low to the ground, as I knew that it was quite a bit low of me, as I had broken a promise with every one, and I knew it. I did not like to break promises, and it was rare when I did, as well as the fact that I did it on purpose very rarely. Like this time for example, which did not make me feel all too bad, as I knew that I had not left every one waiting on purpose, as I knew that I was worn out from staying up so late. I sighed just a bit to my self, as I did still feel bad for them how ever, as I was about to lift my head up, and speak back to Ashton, until I then heard him speak back up to me, once again, before I even had the chance to do such a thing, as I lifted my head back up, and I tilted my head as well, as I then began to listen as to what it was that he had to say to me in the very first place any ways. "What ever dude... What did you have in mind for today?"
I looked at him for a few moments, as I had quite a bit of a blank look on my face, and I knew it as well, as I then saw Ashton all of the sudden squint his eyes at me, as I could tell that he was not only not happy as to the fact that I had left all of them waiting, but there was also the fact that I had a blank look of course, as it did not seem like I had a clue as to what it was that was going on at this very moment in time, nor did I have a plan indeed, as to what it was that we were going to do today.
I once again dipped my head a bit low to the ground, as I kind of felt a bit bad for it. I knew that I had a plan in my head, as to what it was that we were going to do, but it all disappeared from my thoughts last night, when I had got shit faced drunk. I did not remember all that much from what it was that I had said before I had got drunk last night, besides the fact that I had told him, and the others that were with us, that we were going to meet up at the park and do some thing cool.
The some thing that I thought was going to be cool how ever, had not taken all that long to go away from my thoughts how ever, as I felt a bit bad for it as well none the less. I blinked my eyes just a few times all at once, as I then all of the sudden lifted my head up all at once, as I was tempted to just say some thing such as 'well I thought that we should make a plan of what it was that we should do together', which I knew was an idiotic idea as well, as I knew that every one would know I was bluffing, and I really did not have an idea as to what it was that I had planned on doing any ways.
I sighed just a bit, as I figured that I should just be straight forward, as I knew that no one was going to believe me, nor were they going to be all too upset at me, at least that was the hope, as I knew that all of them had more than likely got up quite a bit early for this, only for me to be lazy, and stay in my bed and sleep in. Well... I had not really slept in, rather than the fact that I had been far too lazy to get my ass out of bed.
I rolled my eyes a bit to my self, as I shook off all of those thoughts all at once, as I then spotted some one in the middle of the group of my friends, which confused me quite a bit, as I then all of the sudden tilted my head at the exact same time too, not all too certain as to why that guy was with us right now. Most every one knew that I did not like the guy all that much, as I knew that he was an ass hole, and he had a very big ego.
But there he was... Samuel, and he had oh such a big smile on his face at the exact same time too. I was a bit lost, as I knew for a fact that I had not told him a thing about the fact that we were going to be meeting up here. He must have just had a lucky guess, because I knew that all of my friends did not like him at all, well, besides Kimberly, as it seemed like she had a bit of some sort of sympathy for him, as to the fact that he did not really have all that many other friends, due to the fact that he had such a big ego of course.
I turned my head over to where I could see Kimberly, as I then all of the sudden squinted my eyes at her, which she did not seem to under stand at all. I blinked my eyes all at once, as I then let out a bit of a soft sigh at the exact same time too, as I figured that I should let it bother me all too much, as I knew that she was a lot of the reason that I had got up in the morning in the first place, as I knew that she was going to be here, and I knew at the same time too, that there was some thing that I needed to admit to her.
I stared at her for quite a bit of some time, as I could tell that she still held that same blank look on her face, as it did not seem to make all that much sense to her, as to the reason that I was looking at her right now, when Ashton was the one that was the one that had just spoken to me any ways. I blinked my eyes once again, as I then realized that all at the exact same time as well, as I then all of the sudden, turned my head over to Ashton.
Ashton still had his eyes squinted at me, but I did my best to get my focus off of all of those thoughts, and as to why all at once, as I figured that I should get the most stressful part out of the way, as I knew just what it was that I was going to say to her in the very first place any ways, and I did not have any sort of plan for the rest of the guys at all, which I knew they were not all too happy with.
I stared right back at my best friend, Ashton, for quite a bit of some time, as it seemed that we were having a bit of a staring contest, which once again, I won in it, as I saw him dip his head low to the ground all of the sudden, as it was clear that he could not hang with me. Once I had seen him do such a thing as well, it made me feel a whole lot better, as I then began to suddenly speak up to him, and every one else that was around me right now.
"Well... Give me a bit to think on what it was that I was thinking of... I want to talk to Kimberly first any ways, so give us some space please?" I said to all of them, as I looked at my group of friends that were around me right now, as I then saw that it was clear that they were a bit lost as to what it was that I had meant by that, and also the fact that I had some how forgot what it was that I had planned, as if I was not at all an orc, which I rolled my eyes about at the exact same time as well.
I shook off all of those thoughts all at once how ever, as I then blinked my eyes a few times, realizing as to what it was that I had just said, as I saw every one moving back a bit, to give us some space, as I could tell that Kimberly was quite a bit confused as to why it was that I wanted to talk to her. I wondered if that was a good or a bad thing, as I was fairly certain at this point, that she had known that I had liked her for a fair bit of time.
I smiled just a bit how ever, as I figured that I should not be all too worried about it at all how ever, as I felt like it would simply build the suspense in the air, and it would only make things seem even more cool. I nodded a bit to my self, as I saw that every one had moved back a bit, besides Ashton and Eldon, who were of course my 2 friends that I had told them about the fact that I had a crush in Kimberly, which of course they fully supported me on, as any good friends would do.
They gave me a thumbs up, as I saw that the both of them had big smiles on their faces as well, as it was clear at the very least, that they believed in me, which I was not all too certain as to the fact that if I believed in my self, as I felt like I was going to some how, and in some way managed to choke a few simple words that I was going to say to her. I shook off all of those thoughts all at once how ever, as I then watched as they joined all of the others from not all too far away, as they then went in to a bit of some conversation with one another as well.
I let out a bit of a sigh of relief all at once, as I was about to turn my head to Kimberly all at the exact same time as well, when I then all of the sudden saw that Samuel had quite a bit smile on his face for some odd reason or another, which confused me quite a bit. I was not all too sure as to why he was here right now, if I was going to be completely honest with my self, I was kind of annoyed by it, but I figured that I should not say any thing about it at all how ever.
I shook off all of those thoughts all at the exact same time too, as I got my focus off of the guy, and I then got my eyes on Kimberly, who as soon as I looked over at her, I could not help but to crack quite a bit of a smile on my own face at the exact same time as well, which I could tell that she still was quite a bit lost, and quite a bit confused about some how, as I knew that she was a smart girl, so I was not all too certain as to how she did not have a clue as to what it was that was going on at this very moment in time at all.
I blinked my eyes just a few times, as I tilted my head right back at her. I was a bit lost for some reason as to what it was that was going on right now as well none the less, for some odd reason, even though I knew that I was the one that was about to confess my self, and my love to her. I shook off all of those thoughts off all at the exact same time as well how ever, as I then all of the sudden, began to hear her speak to me.
I stared her right in her eyes, as that was when I then all of the sudden grew a bit of a more serious look on my face all of the sudden, as I knew that this was in fact, quite a serious situation that I was in right now, as we stared at one another for just a little bit more of some time, until I then nodded to her all of the sudden, and then I began to listen as to what it was that she had to say to me in the first place any ways.
"Why did you make every one walk away? What's going on?" She said to me, as it seemed like she had a bit of some kind of fear in her voice, which was a bit rare for her, unless she was afraid of some thing else. Right now it seemed like she might be afraid of me, which did make me feel a bit low, as I hoped that she was not thinking that I was about to do some thing to her at all, as surely she knew that I would never do such a thing, right?
I mean, I knew that I was an orc, but I would have thought that she would have known better from me, as I kind of felt sick by it, as I was starting to think that I might not know her as well as I thought, and that she might not actually trust me at all. I let out a bit of a soft sigh to my self all at once how ever, one that only I was able to notice at the same time as well, as I did my best to get my focus off of all of those thoughts.
I was sure that she did not think that I was going to do any thing to her, especially out in a public place such as this one, as I was sure that she might be a little bit worried about some thing else, though I still was not all too certain as to what it was that it could be at all, if I was going to be completely honest with my self. I had my head tilted just a little bit still, as I still was in fact quite a bit lost by all that was going on right now, but I then shook my head all at the exact same time as well, as I shook away all of those thoughts all at once none the less.
I looked at Kimberly for a few moments too, as I saw that she did not have any fear at all in her eyes, as I wondered if she even had at all, or if I was just going crazy right now, which would not be the first time at all that I had, as I had gone on a bit of a rampage at one point in my life, as I was lucky that I had not hurt any one, as I knew for a fact that it would get me either in jail, or it would get me kicked out of the city, which I was not all too certain as to which one was worse for me.
I sighed all at the exact same time as well all at once how ever, as I got my focus off of all of those thoughts all at the same time as well, as I lifted my head up to Kimberly, a little bit higher, as I then began to do as to what it was that my father had told me to do, as I cracked a bit of a smile on my face, so that I looked strong, and I looked positive to her, as I knew that it meant that she would be more likely to say yes to me.
Once I had done such a thing, I stared at her for just a bit of some time none the less, as I saw Samuel still strangely smiling at me from the back ground, which made me shiver just a little bit, as I then shook off all of those thoughts all at once, at the exact same time too, as I knew that I needed to have my eyes, and my focus on Kimberly right now, as I knew that he did not matter at all right now.
I kept a smile on my face, as I then all of the sudden nodded to her at the exact same time as well. I could still tell that she was a bit lost, as it was clear that she did not have as to much of a clue as to what it was that was going on right now at all, but she did in fact nod right back over to me how ever, which did in fact make me feel a whole lot better as well, as I then all of the sudden, began to start to speak up to her, as I knew that I had to stay strong.
"I just wanted... Well..." I began to say at first, as it seemed like I all of the sudden had come to a bit of a loss for words all at once as well, as I felt like a bit of an idiot on what it was that I was doing right now. I was not all too certain on what it was that I was doing right now if I was going to be honest with my self, as it was starting to feel like more and more, by each passing second, that this was in fact a terrible idea, as I was choking on my words. I saw Kimberly had her head tilted at me, as it was clear that she was lost as to what it was that I was trying to say, which I did not blame her for, especially if she did not have a crush back on me, which I really hoped was not the case at all, as I then all of the sudden, dipped my head a little bit low to the ground. I stared down for just a few moments, as I then all of the sudden shook my head, as I shook off all of those thoughts, and I kept my focus on what it was that I was about to say any ways, as I then all of the sudden lifted my head up once again, and I then began to speak up, just as I had been trying to do before. "I have a crush on your Kimberly... I have for a very long time... I've just been too scared to say any thing about it, because I am an orc... But... If you are interested, than maybe we could go on a date..."
She looked at me for a bit of some time, with a bit of a blank look on her face, which I was not all too certain if that was a bad thing, due to the fact that I felt like, if she was in fact interested in me, than she would have said yes to it right away, right? Perhaps it was a bad idea to add the part where I had said that I was an orc, as I felt like if I was thinking that way about it, than she would not have a choice but to think that way on that as well.
I felt a bit sad now, as I was not all too sure as to what it was that I should do. Maybe this was in fact a terrible idea, as I was not all too certain that an orc and a human could have sex with one another, and we could reproduce. I wanted to just lay down and cry, as I was starting to really feel like quite a bit of an idiot now, as I was not all too sure as to what it was that I had thought in my right mind, that this might actually work for us.
I felt quite a bit sad right now, as I was not all too certain as to what it was that was going on, not what it was that I should do either. I kind of felt like I just wanted to run away, and pretend like none of this was going on at all. Sadly was not the case how ever, as if I really did not want to do this, than I should have put some more thought in to all of it, and I should have never said any thing about it to her at all, in the very first place any ways.
I gulped just a bit, as I knew that once again, just let my father had told me to do, I needed to stay strong, as I kept my head held up high, and I kept a smile on my face, as if it was me saying that I knew that she was going to say yes, but to be truthful, I was not all too certain if that was going to be the case at all, if I was going to be completely honest with my self either way, as I then saw that to my surprise, she was looking right back in to my eyes.
She did not have a look of anger or any thing, but at the same time too, it did not look like she had a look of happiness on her face right now, so I was not all too sure if this was a good thing at all, if I was going to be honest with my self. Kimberly blinked her eyes just a few times how ever, as she then all of the sudden nodded right over to me, which I in turn blinked my eyes right back at her.
I was quite a bit scared if I was not going to lie, as this was the first girl that I had ever asked out, and I was not all too sure that it was going all that well for me so far. I sighed, as I then realized all of the sudden, that she was speaking to me, as I had been a bit lost in my head for me to not notice that she was not in fact doing so. I shook my head as I shook off all of those thoughts all at once how ever, as I then began to listen as to what it was that she had to say to me in the very first place any ways.
"Well... That's the problem... You are an orc... I know you have liked me for a long time Zin... I have liked you too... But... Well... Once again, you are an orc for one thing, and my father makes the end all, say all decision for me..." She said to me, as I then blinked my eyes all at the exact same time too, as it then hit me as to the fact that what it was that she had just said to me. Maybe she was pushing it off, and just saying that she did like me, not to hurt my feelings, but at the same time too, I felt like there was a lot of truth in what it was that she had just said, as I knew that her father did not like me at all, as I had met him once before, and he had not seemed to give me any sort of a chance, even if I wanted to try. I felt a bit bad for it, but I did not know that he had that much control over her, which kind of made me quite a bit angry if I was not going to lie to my self. I did not dip my head a bit low to the ground this time how ever, as I did my best to stay strong, and make sure that I did not get too angry, as I felt like I should say some thing back to her, but she spoke up to me, before I even had the chance to do so. "Also... Samuel just asked me out last night, and I really do like him... Zin... I am sorry..."
สถานะพลังงานรายสัปดาห์
-- การจัดอันดับด้วยพลัง 
-- หินพลัง