บท 3: Chapter 3: Convenience Mate

Ravyn POV

Allied alpha or no, Dane stood ready to go toe to toe with Jude.

Looking remorseful, Jude backed off, exposing his throat. "I had a nightmare."

"So did I," Ravyn offered.

Suspicion etched on his face, Dane narrowed his eyes, taking in Ravyn's and Jude's disheveled appearance. Behind him, Lilia peeked in, and Ravyn thought she'd become a puddle on the thick blue carpet, seeing her daughter's confusion and shock.

"We were helping each other," Jude mumbled.

"As people who have both lost our mates," Ravyn said in a burst of inspiration.

Dane's blue eyes sharpened. "Is there something we need to know?"

Ravyn gave him a reassuring smile. "It's nothing to worry about."

Lilia snorted. "That didn't sound like 'nothing.'"

Ravyn put her hands on her hips. "Go back to your pups. Both of you."

With equal mix intimidating Alpha and exhausted father, Dane stuck a finger out at Jude with the claw extended. "This is MY house and MY pack, and I decide who's welcome."

Lilia hustled him out of the room, with an apologetic but doubtful expression on her face. "I hope the nightmares are all settled. Mother, we're right down the hall if you need us."

Gently closing the door after them, Ravyn returned to sit by Jude. "Now, where were we?"

"My quest to find a Luna for my pack. Goddess ... I'll have to roll over before Dane tomorrow. In his place, I'd be ready to claw whoever hurt my family."

"Next time, think before you act. And careful about just asking for 'a Luna.' You might get someone you can't stand."

Jude put on a brave face. "That's why I came to you. Surely, you wouldn't select anyone that I would dread eating dinner with, much less inviting them into my home and my bed. I don't have to love her or feel the mate pull, but I do need to like her and be able to see eye to eye on ruling the Silverpaws."

Ravyn gave him an old-fashioned look. "Wouldn't you rather seek a fated mate?"

"NO." The growl took her aback. "Haven't you been listening? I don't want to replace Emer! Goddess. I thought I would spend my life with her and someday watch our grandchildren rule the pack ... I can't just replace that.

His brooding brown eyes pierced her heart.

"You understand," he said in an assertive tone. "You haven't accepted another man into your life since that scoundrel deserted you and your child. You did your duty by your Witch Circle community and raised Lilia to become a heroine and a Luna. Now, your entire life revolves around the packs that claim you and the grandchildren that I see clinging to you. You helped vanquish the biggest threat to shifters everywhere apart from the Dark Goddess herself."

His insightful words made her admire him–and curse his perceptiveness. "Even though I still have my shop, the pack occupies far more of my time and thoughts, as you say. The pack is everything to me–because my family is here. You've grown up with that soul-deep connection to your wolf brothers and sisters. I had to discover it as an outsider. But I understand it, just the same–my grandchildren belong to this pack. I have sons that I love dearly as well. And daughters."

He grinned. "As I said, you understand in a way few people do. Are you sure you weren't secretly born a shifter?"

"Positive. And the point of all this flattery would be?"

"I don't flatter," he growled.

"Clearly not. So, you want to find a mate the way most of the world does. No mate pull."

His eyes turned to brown stones. "And bucking thousands of years of shifter tradition. But I don't give a d*mn if you or Eirika or the Moon Goddess disapprove. I can't ... I can't go through that again with a mate."

"You wanted to, with me."

* * * * *

Jude POV

How could he make her understand? Why didn't she look in the mirror and see the heartbreak in her own eyes?

"I was out of my mind," he growled. "And I've been worried about my pack every day. But I don't have the luxury of wallowing. At some point, my son will stop chasing his tail and do his duty. Maybe if he sees me moving forward, he'll get the hint."

Ravyn sat back, projecting unruffled calm. "What are you afraid of? That if you fall in love he'll go rogue?"

He shot to his feet, letting the egg crash to the floor. "My son would NEVER go rogue. He wouldn't even know how!"

He didn't need her to bring up Cyran, and mercifully, she didn't. Instead, she asked, "What did Emer make you promise?"

"That I wouldn't be alone. Also, that I would find a Luna who loves our pack as much as I do. That's all I need. A companion and a Luna."

"I think you're confusing what you need with what you want!

Moon Goddess! He'd never thought Ravyn Rolfe would be this exasperating. True, she could be a fighter, especially when she believed in something ... like now, for instance.

"What I need AND want is what humans, elves, and every other race call a 'marriage of convenience.'" he argued.

Arcturus turned away from him, not deigning to acknowledge him.

"And how often do those marriages create the very sorrow they're meant to prevent? You spoke about the moments with your Emer. If you should find that kind of happiness in a 'marriage of convenience,' will you reject it?"

He bared his teeth. "I don't know because the person I've asked for help is sitting here throwing snares in my path! How can I find happiness when we haven't even started looking for a mate?"

She wouldn't let up. "You deserve to be happy, Jude. You deserve love. You've given your heart and soul to your people, and you've led them even when memories of Emer tormented your sleep."

He paced, unable to look at her. If he let himself drown in the amethyst sea of her eyes, he might just ...

What? Kiss her again?

His wolf nodded smugly.

Ravyn continued. "Dane didn't settle for a 'marriage of convenience'."

"Again, that's different."

"Why? Because they're all younger? I thought shifters would have a more enlightened attitude about love and sex as we age. You live at least as long as witches do."

She'd hit a nerve. "What do you take me for, a shallow, short-sighted HUMAN?"

"You're talking like one," she said, with a wolf-like bite in her voice.

Whirling around, he confronted her. She stood, proud and regal and self-assured. What a woman. She didn't back down.

"Maybe I am," he confessed, surprising them both. "But on the other hand, I'd hardly be the first shifter to think of alliances and strengthening the pack when taking a mate. My Emer was the niece of the previous Alpha of the Oak Ridge Prowlers, as you know."

"Yes, I know."

A loving smile tugged at the corners of his mouth. "But that wasn't the reason I chose her–or at least not my only reason."

Ravyn was suddenly nose to nose with him, and her pine forest perfume fogged his brain. He did deep breathing and pressed his solar plexus to stay present.

"You're telling me now that you're willing to swear off that kind of love for the rest of your life?" she asked.

He bristled. "Just because YOU kissed me--"

"YOU kissed me!"

He was nose to nose with her, and forgetting his embarrassing behavior because her perfume and the memory of her in his arms was too irresistible.

"I was sleepwalking. Maybe we should repeat the experiment?"