[ DISCLAIMER : Some of you may think that snape acted out of character in this chapter and some things happened silly or whatever. I wrote how I thought snape would do in that case, also this is an AU. Libraries are taken ]
........
Severus walked in a hurry to the dungeons while wiping the tears threatening to spill out of his eyes furiously.
' Those fucking marauders. I swear I will kill every one of them. I will show them what real dark magic looks like ' thought Severus while forming into the Slytherin common room.
The common room was a dungeon-like room with greenish lamps and chairs. This dungeon extended partway under the lake, giving the light in the room a green tinge. The common room had lots of low-backed black and dark green button-tufted, leather sofas; skulls; and dark wood cupboards. It was decorated with tapestries featuring the adventures of famous Medieval Slytherins. It had quite a grand atmosphere, but also quite a cold one.
He tried to go to his room as quietly as possible without being found by the likes of rosier, Wilkes and other dunderheads.
" Look who's back, it's mudblood-loving snape. " said the mocking voice of Evan Rosier.
" What do you want, Rosier? " asked Severus, turning to look at rosier who was surrounded by other purebloods.
" Nothing, just to ask where did you disappear off to snape ?" asked Rosier.
" I bet he crawled back to his mudblood for forgiveness like a pathetic house elf," said Wilkes mockingly.
" I don't care for mudbloods, Wilkes," lied Severus with barely concealed anger, while his hand inched towards his wand in his robes.
" You know, I always wanted to ask you snape. Did you get to fuck her, if so is the mudblood fiery in bed too? For a mudblood, she sure is damn hot to fuck. " said rosier lewdly and laughed.
The other purebloods laughed at rosier's crude comments.
" Don't you dare talk about her like that, rosier" said Severus furiously.
" Oohhh..snape's getting angry. Don't want to share that bitch with us, snape. Don't worry snape, I promise to show her a good time." taunted rosier.
I couldn't control my anger anymore, and my body moved instinctively. I brought out my wand quickly and fired a stinging hex right at rosier's face
Rosier was knocked off his feet and fell on his back, while his face swelled in red. He screamed in pain while clutching his swollen face.
I sidestepped just in time as an orange spell flew past me. I gripped my wand tight as some students surrounded me, while some were helping rosier up from the floor.
I quickly cast a shielding charm around myself as dozens of known and unknown spells were fired at me from all directions.
I could see the shield crumbling due to the numerous attacks, I poured every bit of my magic into the shield while searching for a way from this predicament.
I cancelled my shield and rolled to the side just as a dozen spells fall on the place I was before. I cast fumos, which emitted thick smoke from my wand.
The entire common room is covered in smoke which hindered the visibility of the occupants. I cast a disillusionment charm on me and sneakily made my way towards the entrance of the common room.
I narrowly dodged a few spells, while some spells like a stinging jinx and pimple jinx( furnunculus) managed to hit me. I bit my tongue to not scream in pain and reached the entrance of the common room.
I opened the door and was about to escape when a strong gust of wind cleared the smoke in the common room. I looked back to see a 7th-year Slytherin waving his wand and clearing the smoke.
Making sure I was disillusioned properly, I stepped out of the door, when a spell hit my back. I froze like a statue and fell face-first onto the cold stone floor with a crack of my nose.
I heard footsteps nearing me and heard someone cast finite on me, cancelling the disillusionment charm.
" Fucking half-blood," said someone angrily and I felt pain as a kick connected to my ribs.
" Take him inside, it's going to be a pain if Slughorn comes to check," said the same voice.
I felt my body rise into the air and move into the common room. I looked around myself and saw the leather sofas were torn and the floor was charred in some places. The younger students were nowhere to be seen and the older students were repairing the common room.
Surrounding me were Wilkes, Rosier and several other faces which I can recognise as the heirs of the sacred 28 families.
I was dropped onto the stone floor in the bathroom, and my attackers started attacking me mercilessly, some used dark spells which burned my skin, and caused me pain like my insides are on fire, while others used the muggle approach of kicking me in various places.
My head collided on the stone floor due to someone's kick, and I felt myself blacking out. I struggled with all my might against the body-binding charm and succeeded in looking up at my attackers.
' I will kill you, every one of you inbred cunts' I thought while engraving every face in the deepest part of my mind before I succumbed to darkness.
.....
[ THE NEXT MORNING ]
I woke up with a fit of coughs and gasped in pain as my body felt like a herd of hippogriffs went over me. I felt the softness of a mattress instead of the cold stone floor from the previous night.
I tried to open my eyes and look around, but it proved to be difficult due to the bright light which pained my eyes. I shielded my eyes with my hands from the bright light and looked around the place I am in.
I sighed, finding myself in the place where I was a regular customer, the hospital wing. I looked down at my body which was mummified in bandages.
I grit my teeth in anger.
' Pathetic, weak ' I thought at the state of my body. I moved my body weakly to search for my wand.
" Finally, you're awake Severus. Also if you're searching for your wand, it's in the drawer beside your bed" I heard the voice of the Hogwarts matron.
I looked toward the voice and saw madam Pomfrey coming toward me. I then took my wand into my hand and breathed in relief seeing it was undamaged.
" Does it pain anywhere, Severus? " asked Pomfrey while casting diagnostic charms on me.
" No " I lied, not wanting to look any more pathetic than I currently am.
Pomfrey looked at me and I can tell she doesn't believe me.
" If you say so, Severus. But, you have to take these potions," ordered Pomfrey while holding a tray full of various potions.
I was about to disagree vehemently, but pain coursed through my body. I gritted my teeth and nodded my head in defeat.
Pomfrey poured every last drop of the potions into my mouth. I felt like vomiting due to the taste of some potions.
I can feel myself falling into sleep again due to the effects of the points, and I can feel the pains are relieved to an extent
" Take rest, Severus. We'll talk after you wake up " I heard Pomfrey say before drifting off into sleep.
....
I woke up again to the noise of people chattering. I groggily opened my eyes to see James fucking potter being rushed into the hospital wing with his cronies following him.
I quickly cast a disillusionment charm on myself to avoid unnecessary drama.
I watched madam Pomfrey fussing over Potter
for his idiotic behaviour, and potter narrating how he broke his arm in Quidditch practice while trying his new moves. I cringed as people awed at him like he was Merlin incarnate.
' Bloody Gryffindors, hope they get lost soon' I thought impatiently.
" It's good as new now, Mr.potter. You're good to go but, I advise you not to do any more of those idiotic flying moves " warned Pomfrey.
I heard potter's usual boasts about how any can't stop his awesomeness and heard as people started leaving the hospital wing. I waited sometime before confirming that the hospital wing is empty and those dunderheads won't come again and cancelled the disillusionment charm.
" You don't have to be afraid of them, Severus," said Pomfrey while walking towards my bed.
" I'm not afraid of those idiots. I'm afraid of losing my sanity while they are in my presence " I said as calmly as possible.
I relaxed into the bed, as Pomfrey brought a chair near my bed and sat on it.
" Now, let's get to the real issue here. What happened, Severus?" asked Pomfrey seriously.
" Nothing, madam Pomfrey. I was trying to invent a new spell, but it backfired" I lied again.
" We both know you're lying, Severus. I saw injuries made by some nasty dark spells on you, but if you don't want to tell the truth to me. You can tell to the headmaster when he comes to visit you " said Pomfrey sadly.
" Headmaster is coming to see me? " I asked startled.
Pomfrey was about to answer me when someone ran into the hospital wing disturbing the quiet atmosphere.
I looked irritated at the door, only to find the one person I was hoping to never see.
Standing at the entrance, in Gryffindor robes with her red hair tied in a ponytail and her emerald eyes looking in panic was lily.
" Madam Pomfrey, Where's potter?. I heard he was injured " asked Lily hurriedly breaking eye contact with me.
" I fixed him and sent him off, dear," said Pomfrey.
Lily nodded and left the hospital wing without giving me a second glance. My shoulders dropped in despair, seeing lily worried about potter and acting as if didn't exist.
" Dumbledore's going to be here in an hour, he's currently not in Hogwarts which is happening a lot these days. Take some rest or if you are hungry, just call me I will bring you some food " said Pomfrey, while closing the screens around my bed and going back to her work.
I just stared at the ceiling blankly and didn't respond to any of her words.
' So, at last, even lily, my only happiness in this world left me. Maybe I was destined to be like this weak, pathetic, bullied, hated, despised and forever alone with no one. ' I thought while chuckling.
I felt my cheeks damp and realised I was crying.
' Why so sad, Severus? ' suddenly I heard an eerie voice.
' what the fuck ' I thought looking around myself.
' I'm right here, Severus. Turn left ' said the same eerie voice.
I looked to the left and saw a drawer with some potion vials and a small mirror on it.
My reflection in the mirror is staring right back at me with a creepy toothy grin plastered on its face, while in reality, I was frowning if this was real or if was going mental.
' You're not mental, Severus ' said my reflection eerily.
" What the fuck are you? " I asked bewildered
" I'm you, Severus. Specifically the darkness you kept hidden inside you " said my reflection with the same creepy grin.
Your gift is the motivation for my creation. Give me more motivation!
' I'm finally gone crazy.' I thought after hearing my reflection words.
" Madam Pomfrey" I called out to the matron, but she didn't respond to my call.
I called her again, but there was still no answer. I tried calling anyone in the vicinity, but still no response.
" No one's going to come here," said my alter in the mirror.
' Is this another sick prank by those fucking marauders or is it because of any dark spell used by rosier and his idiots? But, why is Pomfrey not coming,...wait a minute ' i thought and listened for the chatter of the students or the ghosts, but I didn't hear a single sound. The entire castle was quiet like it was abandoned.
" This isn't some prank, Severus. We're in your mind " said my alter calmly
" What are talking about? " I questioned it.
"Your body is currently asleep and the place we're in is your mind. " said my alter and vanished from the mirror.
" And we're here because there is so much we have to talk about," said my alter creepily from beside me
I looked towards the voice and saw a replica of myself ( alter ) sitting in a chair beside my bed.
" What do we have to talk about? " I asked.
" We talk about you. About your disgusting devotion towards lily, your anger at the marauders, your hate towards your father, your cowardness, your desire for power and much more. To do that, we have to go down your memory lane" said alter and the world turned pitch black.
The light soon filled my eyes, as I was standing in a place I was so familiar with in spinners' end, my home.
I was standing in the living room of my home and watched as my father, Tobias snape backhanded the 6-year-old version of me. I remembered that moment, it was because I did accidental magic and vanished my father's beer case.
The scene change again and I watched as I grew up in memories. I watched as I was beaten by my father and ignored by my mother who was too scared to confront my father to stop it, I watched as other kids mocked me, I watched as I met lily and petunia, I watched as we entered Hogwarts.
The bullying of the marauders, the taunts of my housemates, the indifference of lily about my bullying, the professors not believing me because of my house, the days I spent in the hospital wing due to the marauders and my housemates.
I watched everything in my pathetic life until now play before me.
I chuckled mirthlessly after watching my life devoid of happiness.
' Is this how I am supposed to live my entire life? lonely, sad, and pathetic. it's better if I just die ' I thought.
" It depends on you, Severus. " I heard the voice of my alter, as the scene changed to the top of the astronomy tower.
Standing at the edge of the tower was my alter with his black robes fluttering in the wind.
" What can I do? I don't have money, background or political connections like potter or black. I'm just a nobody " I said gloomily
" You have something much more powerful than those, Severus. You know" said my alter looking at me.
" You can modify potions and make them more efficient with a single glance and create new spells. You can duel far better than most of the students in the castle. You can manipulate people with just your words. You are underestimating yourself, Severus. " said alter
" What do you want to be after Hogwarts, Severus? " questioned alter.
" You are me, don't you know what I want to be, " I said irritatedly
My alter didn't respond and just looked at me stoically. I sighed in defeat and answered him.
" I want to serve the dark lord," I said.
" Why? " questioned my alter.
" He can give me power, status and the respect I deserve for my skills," I said
" Who said that only by serving him you can achieve those? " inquired my alter.
" How else can I get them? I'm a half-blood, like I said I have no privileges like the purebloods" I said to him
" Did you even listen to anything I said? Rosier and your housemates use you for their homework, they mock you and beat you because of your blood. They beat you to near death just for talking back to them yesterday, they don't like a half-blood like you above them. When they think you are of no more use to them, they will not hesitate to kill you. I know, why you want to join the dark lord because you want to be accepted. No one in our entire life accepted us, our father, fellow Slytherins, students, professors. " said alter.
I clenched my hands listening to him say the truth out loud, I avoided all these years.
" What else can I do? It's either joining the dark lord or dumbledore. I would rather die than work with that old coot and the bloody Gryffindors. " I groaned
" Don't join either of them. You can do so many great things, Severus. It's just you are underestimating yourself. Do you want to see how your life will be if you wrote your destiny? "asked alter
I nodded my head and the scene changed again. Now, I was standing in the centre of the great hall of Hogwarts. The entire hall is filled with people wearing black robes, who are kneeling towards a lone figure sitting in the chair of the headmaster, with a heap of wands at his feet.
The lone figure is dressed in black attire with a black cloak. Most of his are covered by the hood of his cloak.
I could feel the magic exuding from him, it was powerful. I felt my breath hitch being in his presence.
'Who is that? ' I thought in fear
" That's you, Severus." I heard alter say from beside me
" Me? " I asked in disbelief.
" Yes, it's what you can become if you can accept yourself," said alter.
" Accept myself? " I asked in doubt
" You hide from your pain. You act indifferent to everything because you are afraid. You think that if you act like you don't care, it hurts less. But, you're wrong, all that anger, rage, despair and pain don't go away. They grow and grow until you can't keep them inside anymore and they start to change you. That's why I am here, to change you and make the best of you. Embrace the darkness, Severus" said alter grinning.
I stood contemplating his words. He was right, I have to stop hiding. The instant I thought that I was bombarded with feelings of rage, anger and pain. I stumbled forward, closed my eyes shut and screamed at feeling years' worth of those negative emotions.
The pain started subsiding, so I opened my eyes and found myself overlooking the great hall with people kneeling in front of me.
' I'm him. ' I thought seeing the black attire I was wearing and the heap of wands at my feet. I could feel the magic flowing through my veins, it was exhilarating.
I looked towards the centre of the hall and watched as my alter grinned at me and vanished into particles.
I closed my eyes, took a deep breath and concentrated on waking up.
I woke up again and found myself on the bed in the hospital wing.
" Madam Pomfrey " I called out to the matron, hoping it worked and I'm not stuck in my mind forever.
" Yes, Severus " I heard the voice of Pomfrey as she parted the screen surrounding my bed and peeked in.
" I'm hungry," I said to her and watched as she went in a hurry to get me something to eat.
I moved my body to sit in a comfortable position and looked up at the ceiling and for the first time, I felt relieved.
....
[ Narrator POV ]
As Severus was immersed in his thoughts, he didn't see wisps of darkness seeping out his bandaged wounds.
A shockwave unseen and undetected by most of the beings spread from Severus and covered the entire world.
Creatures born from magic and seers are the only ones who felt the disturbance in the magic.
Dementors screeched in joy, and unicorns ran away from Hogwarts and into the depths of the forbidden forest.
Fawkes shrieked feeling the darkness pulsing in the magic and the basilisk slumbering in the depths of Hogwarts woke up after a long time.
Seers around the world gave out a prophecy. A prophecy about a man born from darkness.
...
AN: This chapter was tiring to write. I didn't know how to change snape mindset without breaking his character. I tried my best and hope you liked it. plz, forgive the cringe.
Word count will be 1500, so I can upload daily without burning myself out.
I want to make Severus a badass character. I try my best to make the scenes as cringe-less as possible. Severus will become op, just not straight away. He will face defeats, obstacles, and hardships just like any normal person, but he will beat them using his wits and hard work. There won't be any cliche troupes where he gets a letter from Gringotts for prince heir, learning bullshit anime tricks.
Also, I decided on the pairing, it's Severus x Bellatrix. There will be serious marauder bashing, like very serious, so if anyone likes them yet yourself out now.
Also, there won't be narcissa for Severus, she's just a friend. I plan to make Lucius x narcissa as a side plot. ( it's fixed )
Anyways, throw those powerstones at me if you have some.
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