บท 3: A good dad
NOTE: Some of you told me you cant read the chaps cause of some webnovel update shit. I also publish in Archive of Our Own and Fanfiction.net Same story title and same user name.
***
Harry Potter was always jealous of his friend Ron.
Harry had fame and money, which Ron wanted. But Ron had what Harry craved, a big family.
As Doran he has a big family, a family that is going to get bigger soon.
A little sibling.
Just the thought of it amazes Doran.
He is going to be a big brother!
He is happy and anxious, but also terrified.
`Oh Merlin. I'm going to be a big brother!`
`What if I'm a terrible brother? What if he dislikes me?! What if-`
Doubt, fear and insecurity take over the baby prince.
He begins to find it difficult to breathe, the air does not reach his lungs and he feels pressure in his abdomen and chest.
He tries to calm down to no avail, his mind scrambled with a thousand doubts.
`A panic attack? The fuck did Rick say to do to get over a panic attack?`
He tries to remember his therapist's instructions for these situations.
`Breathe, count each breath and focus on external stimuli`
Doran starts to take a deep breath.
`One, two, three...`
Now that he has a family, Doran is terrified of screwing it up.
To do something and lose them.
His family no longer loving him became his greatest fear.
He logically knows that this is not going to happen, his parents are not going to forget about him just because they will have another child. But there is a little voice in his head that whispers things to him.
It tells him that the baby is going to replace him. That he is nothing more than an impostor and when the baby is born the Martells will realize that he does not belong with them, that he is not a true Martell.
After a few minutes he looks around.
`chandelier, fireplace, pictures`
`Smell of soap and a citrus? Oranges!`
He sees a bowl of oranges on a table.
After calming down, Doran tries to think of pleasant things, like the stories of his uncle.
`What was that knight's name? Amon? A-?`
***
The months go by and his mother's stomach grows bigger and bigger.
To Doran`s relief things do not change in his daily routine. His family still spends a lot of time with him. Seeing that his mother's pregnancy doesn't make them forget about him, his mind calms down a bit.
But the one who calmed all his doubts once and for all was his father.
It was a rare day when the clouds hid the sun and the temperature dropped to a more comfortable level, Prince Trystanne took his son to the training grounds.
The training camps are divided into different sections.
In one section there are several hay targets in different positions and at varying distances. In another section there are rocks and other things used for body strengthening. In another section they are training swordsmen, in another spearmen,...
The spearmen and swordsmen are skillful, they move in a coordinated way, it almost looks like they are dancing. A dance of steel and blood.
Fascinating as they are, Doran's attention is drawn more to the other guards, who are fighting using less conventional weapons.
The skill with which some men fight with the whip amazes him.
`Wow. I had never seen anyone fight with whips before. I saw people fight with swords, spears and axes at Renaissance fairs but never before with whips.`
Doran looks at them with stars in his eyes.
The way they move, how they control the whip.
`It is as if it were an extension of their bodies!`
He is spellbound.
"This is my domain son." The sudden voice of his father scares him a little. "Your mother will rule Dorne and I will protect it. That is my duty: to defend our family and our kingdom."
Trystanne enters the training grounds.
Seeing that the princes approach, the guards stop their training and bow to them. His father nods and the guards go back to their training.
"I was born the second son of Lord Dayne of Starfall. Not much was expected of me. My brother Edric is the perfect heir. Clever, wise, and just."
Trystanne tightens his grip on his baby but not enough to hurt him.
"I have to admit that I was jealous of Ed when I was a child. My brother, just a few moments older than me, was the light in our father's eyes. We are twins, but different as day and night. The only thing we have in common It's our blood and silver hair. Ed has our father's pale skin and purple eyes while I have our mother's olive skin and golden eyes. Edric is a scholar while I am a warrior. He is serious and righteous while I am a jester, at least in our fathers eyes"
The prince stops and watches two swordsmen fight.
"No matter how hard I tried to be like Ed, to be as good as him, I never succeeded. We are too different. I could never sit in a chair for hours reading books or doing paperwork." Trystanne smiled wistfully. "But Ed could never spend a whole day training under the scorching sun. In fact Edric hated military training, he preferred reading a book in the shade to training with weapons. Quite the opposite of me. From the first time I saw a sword I fell in love. Edric was born to rule and I was born to fight."
The prince gives the guards some advice and moves to another section of the training grounds.
"I was about ten namedays old when it dawned on me: Every person is different. No two people are identical, not even twins. Especially twins. Ed and I are different and that's okay. He's good at his things and I'm good at mine."
Trystanne watches two spearmen clash.
"Maybe one day you and your little sibling will face similar problems. On that day I will do everything in my power to reassure both of you. I love you both equally and nothing will change that, son. My father is a good lord but a bad father, he always had a clear preference for Ed and he practically ignored me and my sister. When Ob told me she was pregnant I promised myself that I would be a good father, a much better father than Lord Jason Dayne."
***
His bond with his father grew stronger that day.
And his doubts finally disappeared. He understood that his family's love is not conditional and he was finally able to enjoy the prospect of having a little sibling.
Doran will do his best to be a good older brother.
***
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