บท 4: Chapter 4 Only Sleep with Men
After finishing his meal and leaving, Lu Heyang found Lu Xun in a narrow alley, leaning against a wall while smoking. With one hand in his pocket and a cigarette between his fingers, Lu Xun exhaled smoke that swirled around his face. Even in the dark, the glowing ember at the tip of the cigarette highlighted his sharp features. He had already been handsome ten years ago, and now his face had matured into something even more striking, with perfectly balanced proportions. As their eyes met, Lu Xun raised his brow slightly.
"All done?" Lu Xun flicked ash from his cigarette with a casual motion.
"Yeah," Lu Heyang replied calmly. He didn't recall Lu Xun ever smoking, but then again, so much had changed during the years they had been apart. The man standing before him had become someone almost unrecognizable.
Lu Xun chuckled softly. "Did your sister-in-law get upset?"
"She's just a colleague," Lu Heyang corrected.
"Fine. Did your colleague get upset?"
"I wouldn't know."
"Big brother, you're still the same. You don't understand women at all."
Lu Xun recalled how, in the second half of their high school years, Lu Heyang was popular with the girls. Several younger students sent him love letters, all of which were met with his cold rejection. Some even tried to pass letters through Lu Xun, who accepted them but never delivered them. After all, rejection was inevitable, so what difference did it make? Lu Xun had felt completely justified in his actions.
"Am I supposed to?" Lu Heyang responded playfully.
Lu Xun exhaled his final puff of smoke, letting it envelop Lu Heyang. "If you only sleep with men, then no, you don't have to."
Lu Heyang was left speechless.
To be honest, Lu Heyang wasn't sure when he had figured out his own sexual orientation. During his ten years abroad, he had tried dating women and had received advances from men. But in the end, he remained single, without a partner or even a casual fling. He wasn't sure if he was only attracted to men or if he was specifically attracted to Lu Xun—or rather, to the 18-year-old Lu Xun.
Ten years ago, on the eve of his departure abroad, the sweltering, sticky summer night.
Eighteen-year-old Lu Xun had quietly climbed into Lu Heyang's bedroom from the balcony. Lu Heyang was fast asleep, his breathing steady, and his eyes shut. Moonlight seeped through the curtains, casting a cold glow over his body.
Unobserved by those dark eyes, Lu Xun crouched by the bed, studying him with bold curiosity.
Lu Heyang always looked so pitiful, his soft bangs resting innocently above his eyelashes. His brows were delicate, like willow leaves; his lips resembled wild cherries. A line extended from the small mole behind his ear down his jawline, ending in a pointed chin.
Especially those eyes—once they opened, they gleamed like polished obsidian. When he lowered his gaze, a soft light would flicker within them. But after watching him for a while, Lu Xun knew that beneath that softness was a detached indifference. He stirred emotions in others, but he never intended to take responsibility.
Lu Xun hated this about him. It was this very look that made their parents favor Lu Heyang, feel guilty towards him, and eventually sacrifice their lives for him.
Lu Xun kicked off his shoes and quietly climbed onto the bed, kneeling on either side of Lu Heyang's body. In the darkness, he leaned in close, examining his sleeping face.
The moonlight shifted, its silvery beams slowly sweeping across Lu Heyang's eyelashes, illuminating each strand.
Sweat slicked Lu Xun's palms as he pulled a small knife from his pocket. The blade glinted with a cold sheen as he held it above Lu Heyang's closed eyelids.
If he plunged the knife down, Lu Heyang would never again look at him with those pitiful eyes.
He would no longer be able to take their parents' money and leave the country without a second thought, living the good life abroad.
Lu Xun's thoughts spiraled.
At that moment, Lu Heyang's eyelashes fluttered, and he slowly opened his eyes, his sleepy gaze soft as cotton. He locked eyes with Lu Xun.
Their eyes met, with a knife hovering between them.
The cicadas outside droned incessantly, casting shadows across the ground, flowers scattered like a dream. Lu Heyang felt a sudden impulse—if only this were a dream.
After a moment of surprised calm, Lu Heyang's eyes filled with a wave of emotion. His Adam's apple bobbed as he swallowed and said to Lu Xun in a steady voice, "Don't hurt me. I can make you feel good."
He lifted his eyelids, his dark eyes rolling upward. Dogs begging for food looked at people like this. When he begged for love from his adoptive parents and his biological parents, he looked at them like this too. He knew, deep down, that Lu Xun couldn't resist either.
Lu Xun froze.
As much as he hated to admit it, Lu Xun liked Lu Heyang's lips. He had liked them from the first moment he saw them.
Now, he liked them even more.
After they had been wrapped around him, those lips became a bright red that wouldn't quite close, like cherry blossoms turning into plum blossoms, from spring to winter, all captured between Lu Xun's teeth.
Lu Xun lay on his back, breathing heavily. His fingers unconsciously threaded through Lu Heyang's soft hair, tightening on his scalp. He glanced up and caught sight of the full, yellow moon hanging over the balcony, like a ripe orange on a branch.
The syrup was sticky, and he let out a stifled groan, licking his dry lips as thirst consumed him.
"Who taught you this?"
"Lin Sheng."
"Who?" Lu Xun asked without thinking.
"My adoptive father."
Lu Heyang lifted his face as he spoke. Lu Xun glanced over, surprised to see that there was no extra emotion on his face. There was no hate, no love, not even pity for himself.
It made Lu Xun feel pity for him. But what did he take Lu Xun for? The feeling of being insulted swelled within him.
"You're such a wh*r*," Lu Xun spat, suddenly losing all desire.
Lu Heyang pressed his lips together, silently watching as Lu Xun turned away to dress. Though a year younger, Lu Xun had grown faster, now standing half a head taller than him.
The short sleeves quickly covered the sweat and birthmark on his back as Lu Xun hurriedly left.
The next day, Lu Heyang flew to the United States, leaving behind only the pajamas that had carried both of their scents. They were neatly folded on the bedside table. After that, there was no further news.
สถานะพลังงานรายสัปดาห์
-- การจัดอันดับด้วยพลัง 
-- หินพลัง