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Kael Cor: A Vampire's Awakening ต้นฉบับ

Kael Cor: A Vampire's Awakening

Urban 437 ตอน 4.7M จำนวนคนดู
นักเขียน: Anone

3.96 (167 เรตติ้ง)

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เรื่องย่อ

Kael Cor wakes to find himself in a dungeon, as a newly awakened vampire. He has to struggle through rules and social structures that he has no understanding or memories of to survive.

With pure luck and a system that wants him to succeed for its own ends, he climbs to a position of power within the vampire community. With enemies outside the dungeon they are all living in, breathing down their backs, and enemies within, threatening the hard won peace he has managed to aquire, Kael must find a way to succeed in the life he wants for those he cares about.

Please check out my WSA 2022 Novel (Titan Rising Online: World Breaker )

A winner in the first Webnovel Writing Contest


PS: The earlier 3 to 4 dozen chapters are a little choppy, inconsistent and filled with grammatical errors. But that's because I was still learning how to write(I still am) then. But please do stick around longer, it gets better.

Check out my other novels.

The Two Lives Of Aaron Wade: The Gamer & The Heir

Legends Of Qi Earth: Wudang

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    เขียนรีวิว
    TwistedSomnus

    There's a problem with the writing. The english itself is fine, but the pacing, focus, and rational are all sub-par. Pacing - There are 3 chapters before the official chapter 1 that are glossaries of terms and information about the world, and this is a definite red flag. 1) This is a terrible way to start a story. I don't want to do homework in order to read a novel for leisure. 2) If this is neccessary to understand the story, then you have failed as a writer. You need to show the audience, not tell them. That's the difference between a story and a textbook. 3) Revealing all these details is a part of storytelling. Dumping them all in the beginning simply means you can't use their revelation to further your story. Discovering things with the MC is one of the joys of reading a book, and now you've robbed us of that experience to some extent. 4) By talking about the X levels of your world and how people struggle to climb them, you not only told us the end point of your story, but informed us that we're going to have to read what is basically the same story X times. Another mystery dead and a promise of an endlessly repetitive story. Focus - You need to trim the fat. Details, such as the fact that the MC came in his pants after his first feeding, either need to be cut out or utilized to further the narrative. I believe you were attempting to show how overwhelming of an experience his first feeding was, but you didn't go into enough detail for this fact to be anything other than a distraction. You basically skimmed through the fact that he was exhausted, breezed through his emotional state, and then described in detail the tent in his pants and the stain from his ejaculation. 1 graphic detail amongst a few brief ones sticks out like a sore thumb, and just because it's about a sexual organ doesn't make your novel more "*****." Rational - "Because the information might put you in danger" is not a constructive reason to deny a amnesiac character information about THEMSELVES. That's basically saying "because the author doesn't want the audience to know." You talk about enemies and danger as if covering your eyes will somehow make them go away. All it does is render the MC helpless to avoid these dangers and force him to stumble face first into them due to ignorance.

    5yr
    ดู 10 การตอบกลับ
    Anone
    LV 13 Badge

    I always write a review for all my novels. Why? Well I think its because I love to see my name in big letters. This is a reincarnation novel, but I wrote this to focus on one thing and one thing alone........destiny. Is it something predetermined, or something you make for yourself, Kael Cor is my own way of finding that answer. If I have a destiny, then do I decide what it is, does God?, or something else. My journey to that answer is within the pages of this book, and I want to share it with you. Let's go

    6yr
    ดู 63 การตอบกลับ
    JONRED

    So good start little dark made me want to read more so i can find the redemption/evolution of the MC thinking to myself the author has it all planned out....such foolish thoughts.The MC not only does not get any good justice but he is a cuck so beware of neotare elements.The story goes from dark to wanna be comedy its painfull but what is more painfull is that the author has not single thing planned out and keeps adding **** as the story goes on.So to recap story slow and dragged,MC has no memories from his life but is also a reincarneted person from earth(our earth not this world)who also has no memories from earth as well...has some power sealed thats not usefull and somehow gets another power that makes his seal not matter at all(i hope it makes sense cause trust me in the story it doesnt).And the world(oh man)is unknown just some info drops about its history about the races and the story takes place in a prison cave thats like big(convinient to the author who doesnt know how big even himself)where vampires somehow are slaves and have seals that prevent the use of THE WAY( i **** you not that was the term he uses lmfao)and somehow there are guards but it doesnt even feel like a prison.So i hope i saved you guys some time well spent.

    เปิดเผยสปอยเลอร์
    5yr
    ดู 24 การตอบกลับ
    SinfuLeeCerebral

    I'm about 20 chapters in as is my limit for every novel on seeing whether i will continue reading it and gauging its overall quality. I'm really liking the mixed genre of the novel and how there are so many possibilities towards growth and development. everything from Sci-fi to magick seems possible. the MC is lamentable at times though, his personality isn't very believable and can seem extremely immature. for being a prisoner he sure is lighthearted... i know he's only suppose to be 19, and that he no longer has his past memories but seeing such child like thoughts coming from him can grow annoying quickly. (is supposed to have regressed but some how knows how to be witty and talk back to the guards? lacks decorum and common sense but remembers non-sense such as actors and short phrases?) i feel like this novel could be a stellar 5 star novel if the author spent more time rereading the work for mistakes (as most of them can be easily found if the extra time was spent) and if the fourth wall wasn't broken at all. this novel really has the opportunity to be phenomenal if the serious undertones wouldn't keep getting disturbed mid flow. you have this novel that talks about the lives of others as if they're nothing and how rape and murder could happen around any corner, then out of no where (insert half remembered words or phrases. insert breaking the fourth wall.) it just completely lessens the overall quality of the novel. if author chose to rewrite this without so much nonsense and fourth wall breaking this could easily make it to the front page for weeks to come. best of luck to the author though, I'll continue to read it for a while longer to see how the author develops everything...

    6yr
    ดู 9 การตอบกลับ
    SoMogt

    Should harm your A.S.S what a lame reason for not telling him the past. If you know the past they will harm you... who? You can’t know they will harm you..... rly Sorry but this is so off and so stupid.

    6yr
    ดู 2 การตอบกลับ
    Daoist_Immortal_X

    Let me start with a warning: this novel needs NTR warning (or NTR tag). Beware! Read at your own risk! As for review: This novel is not very consistent. Author tries to mix stuff that doesnt mix well. Really dark stuff (torture, rape, NTR, etc.) mixed together with some immature joke usually ends up awkward. Also characters are very shallow. They just get one superficial characteristic and they act only based on that. You cant find any deeper motivation. Like this guy is cruel, another is greedy, this girl is arogant, etc. Even main character is very shallow. He remembers his past life and has many life experiences and yet he usually acts like a little brat without any care. Also whole world is mumbo jumbo mess that doesnt make much sense. It looks like author didnt put much thought into it when he created it. I dont recommend reading this.

    5yr
    ดู 2 การตอบกลับ
    SrWeedalot

    Do you like an mc that get's slapped around and pis*ed on? Well, if so then this is the novel you have been looking for. Do you like an mc that get's slapped around and pis*ed on? Well, if so then this is the novel you have been looking for.

    6yr
    ดู 12 การตอบกลับ
    Daoistunderlord

    NTR enough said ......................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................

    4yr
    ดู 2 การตอบกลับ
    Leon07

    Netotare, that word should be enough for most readers to know why they shouldn't read this. I was interested in the novel at first, but it started showing signs of NTR, and then it just threw it all out onto us ( within first 50 chapters ). Quite disappointed

    5yr
    ดู 7 การตอบกลับ
    JavaTari

    Honestly it’s a decent story but it’s more of a preference thing with me. The whole perfect hero thing really doesn’t sit well with me. For gods sake he’s a vampire, atleast make him less hero-y. And what is this about in all these years in the pit the vampires have only learned to love. I call BS. Total BS. In fact, all they should have learned to do was HATE. With the treatment of the guards and like 99% of vampires pride, there should have been an uprising LONG ago. Hell, citizens of England rebelled because the fuckin taxes were too high. And while they could rule through fear it just leads to more uprisings. Another thing I hate is harems. Idk why but I just find it reaaallly annoying. I’m at like chapter 30 something and he already has 2 permanent wives. There’s still like 170 chapters left. From what I’ve seen I can already tell how this novel is going to go. I’ve seen a lot of great novels with good potential take the harem route and either end up getting dropped halfway through or ends up with like 1k chapters and so many girls I can’t even remember half of them. In fact, I usually don’t really like the MC having a wife/husband or children at all. Don’t get me wrong, I love a good romance story, but in adventure novels like these they almost always just fade into the background and don’t do anything (which at that point, why even add them), or they severely hold back the MC and end up getting kidnapped or something to use against the Mc. I’m just tired of it. Back to the hero thing, I personally prefer a more anti hero, who acts for his own benefits. And seeing as the MC is a VAMPIRE, even if he was a very kind human, should be much less heroic. Honestly, why does he even think that drinking blood is something he should be ashamed of? He had his memories wiped and it should just be natural for him. And wtf is up with him just casually giving away that one precious liquid to the lover guy. Like seriously?!?!!that is the STUPIDEST THING I have ever seen an MC do. another thing, the training seems to be more secondary, and it seems the main subject of the story isn’t him getting strong but saving the vampires. Also random complaint, why did the vampires show disdain when he drank blood from the one wife, if anything they should have been supportive of him. Based on how many times the author mentioned it losing control at the revenant stage should be completely natural and expected. The vampires should have helped him get over this hurdle and not shun him for it. Honestly I know this all comes down to personal preferences. I really tried to read this like you told everyone too as you say it gets better. But it just rubs me the wrong way. Sorry for ranting, this is all just my personal opinion continue on writing however you want to. And I know you probably don’t care as I’m one of many readers you have, but for now (and probably forever) I’m dropping this.

    เปิดเผยสปอยเลอร์
    5yr
    ดู 9 การตอบกลับ
    Prosperous

    So first off, not my cup of tea so take what I say with a grain of salt... To avoid spoilers, lets just say that this story is missing some tags. Like "Tragedy", "Blackmail", "Betrayal", "Slavery", "Extortion", "Rape" and "Grimdark". Lots of trigger warnings needed. The summary made me think this was going to be a story where the MC gets a "system" or uses "game-like elements" to quickly become OP and face slap the people who made him a vampire and enslaved him but that is not what happens... at least not in the first 50 chapters. I tried to give the story a fair shot; the author himself admits the first 4 chapters are not great and that this is a repost of his first ever story but I got to 50 chapters and had to quit. Its hard to give examples without spoilers but any one of my suggested tags would have been a deal breaker for me normally so I cant reccomend this story. P.S. The MC is also reborn from modern Earth so he makes a lot of references but since the setting is a fantasy world it feels real jarring and destroys any chance of immersion. Usually I dont mind if the reincarnated MC invents pizza or makes an anime joke but in this dark fanatsy setting it feels awkward.

    5yr
    ดู 1 การตอบกลับ
    SilverEmpyrean

    This novel is on the same league as other paid novels with in-depth character, world and background development, if this gets more in to action hopefully, it will be awesome! i suggest give it ago for the next 5 chapters!

    6yr
    ดู 1 การตอบกลับ
    WolfTheLion

    Pro: good start. Interesting world Dark feel Cons : forced romance Ntr And the biggest one : the mc Honestly it's more of a personal taste But i can't root for the mc in fact i began To dislike him lol, way too naive and Foolish , similiar to japanese mcs. In conclusion : read with caution, there are a lot of dealbrakers but if you don't mind them it will be a good read.

    5yr
    ดู 4 การตอบกลับ
    DipTheDoggie

    Wow this novel started out great but absolutely sucks now. Not sure why this is rated so highly, started reading it for the dark grimy mood but turned into a cheesefest with **** comedy. Not for me, and funny how the Author ignores every constructive criticism and only responds to positive ones. Well I doubt the novel changes much but I don’t really want to waste my time reading this. And the is married after 10 chapters lol. What a way to ruin it.

    5yr
    ดู 5 การตอบกลับ
    kjkjjkjk

    So having read past chapter 80 I feel fully confident in giving my review. This book is not enjoyable to read, and the reason why is somewhat hard to spot. The biggest flaw is that I, as a reader, actively want Kael to die. He is a whiny, crybaby who got what he deserved. He says that he suddenly has trust for women again after his mom had stepped out on his dad...but why? He trusts two women, one of whom had a child with another man. None of the reasoning seems to hold together very well. The dark elements are done really well, but they don't seem to ever be in the forefront. The universe itself is fairly decent, a good story could definitely grow from these basic story roots, but it never does. While it is possible that Kael eventual grows a set of testicles, I find that very unlikely. Even if he does, these 80 chapters are not salvageable.

    5yr
    ดู 2 การตอบกลับ
    breakingdawn

    What the **** man how can you just add so much comedic undertone in a serious novel like this. I mean I understand that you want stretch chapters but seriously I thought that it has lots of potential as I read the first couple of chapters then it came the idiotic undertone cliches

    5yr
    ดู 6 การตอบกลับ
    ddz1rt
    LV 12 Badge

    The only decent thing about this waste of time is interesting and unique world setup. Otherwise annoying, plain and boring read. So, if you're interested in something to just waste your time this one fits the bill if not - just skip.

    5yr
    ดู 3 การตอบกลับ
    Potatoesandonions

    I am truly impressed by the author, honestly speaking if there ever was someone who would trade in a pile of gold solid gold for a worthless pile of rubbish it's this author right here. The starting and world foundation was excellent not too tiring to read exciting even the first chapter was dark and promising then Lord knows what happened but he or she decided to try and copy the brilliant comedy of a well known and loved mercenary and failed horribly. The world was amazing to imagine the mc with so much promise wasted. You can read it if you like but it'll most likely frustrate you in a bad kind of way. Author should have stuck to what you had it was magic

    เปิดเผยสปอยเลอร์
    5yr
    ดู 2 การตอบกลับ
    achearon

    Dude someone humiliated,raped and tortured your woman in public and you pay him an absi4d amount of money for it. Mc is got to be the most idiotic mf i ever met in my life. Why not take that money and go to some of the big gun so they just off your enemy. Author you sure you are thinking straight?

    เปิดเผยสปอยเลอร์
    4yr
    ดู 4 การตอบกลับ
    DonHit

    👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍

    6yr
    ดู 1 การตอบกลับ

    นักเขียน Anone