/ Anime & Comics / Gamer in Overlord
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My first ever try at writing a story, so it's gonna be bad. But I would like to become a better writer so i would appreciate any helpful advice or criticism.
Anyway, it's a Overlord SI/OC story. A guy dies, gets 1 wish and then gets thrown into a world he seems unfamiliar with. Now it's time for his great adventure.
English is my third Language. I write on a phone. And my Internet connection is bad. So if you think there's something wrong with the fic, it's not my fault XD
I do not own Overlord or the characters mentioned in the story. I do not own the cover photo. I only own The OC.
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สถานะพลังงานรายสัปดาห์
-- การจัดอันดับด้วยพลัง 
-- หินพลัง คุณอาจชอบ
54รีวิว
4.17
- คุณภาพงานเขียน
- ความเสถียรของการอัปเดต
- การดำเนินเรื่อง
- กาสร้างตัวละคร
- พื้นหลังโลก
แบ่งปันความคิดของคุณกับผู้อื่น
เขียนรีวิว
In the history of Web Novel, there exist no Overlord fanfic that was ever finished by any author. I am a big fan of Overlord. Hopefully the author don't drop this. Speaking of the story, it was great. Got little bit confused about the 'Gamer system' and the 'Yggdrasil game system' at first. But it's alright. The author kinda abandonned the Yggrasil system. I believe the story is going into the right path. Best of luck to the author, you are doing awesome!
Compulsory Shameless 5 star review from the author. It's my first time writing a fanfiction so it won't be good but still leave a review about what you think of the story.
Hi all. I am Russian and write through Google Transliteration. I was able to last until chapter 36. You know, I'm not very picky. In my entire life, I have read, probably, more than 5000-6000 thousand fanfictions and books. I myself officially publish and sell books. I have seen a lot, seen worse, but now about something else. Let's start with the basics: the system. The main character, literally on the first day, was able to pump so much that he would subjugate the whole city. Excess power level as in the world of the future (Power level 100 player level). The hero subjugated all the admins of the game, but preferred to farm with his hands. Okay, I thought, maybe this is such a feature. But that's where everything else came in. A thousand plot blunders and holes. Intelligence at the level of a 14 year old child. This will be said, perhaps to offend the author, but do not make the hero 28 years old if you, as I assume, are no more than 16-18. I myself am almost 30, I know the thoughts of a person of 30 years and they are not so ... white and black. Let's move on to something for which I give stars. The quality of the writing? - It's not for me to judge, I'm Russian. (It's not the best, I'll put 4 stars) Update stability? - I can’t judge either, because I didn’t even finish reading the story (but not the best, 3 stars) Story development? - one. Terrible development, because it does not exist. A simple enumeration of achievements (but at least something) Character design? I would put, honestly, zero, but there is no such thing. There is no character development, no thoughts, not even dialogues. World background - 0, no difference from the original work, if you had not read the overlord, you would not have understood what the world was about.
Every single overlord fanfic I've read turned out to be bad. Some of them did have a good start but as the story progressed, the writer would have no idea what to write or just make the story was altogether bad. Sadly this fic was no different
A very good story with few faults. The writing quality is a little wonky at times, but it can be explained by the fact that the author seems to be writing on their phone. Still, nothing is unreadable and everything flows nicely. The updates are stable (at least as of now) and keep coming daily. The story develops quite fast, and everything is being set up for the MC to finally go to the New World. The MC is likeable and interesting; doesn't seem to be a braindead moron. Hope it stays that way. World is rich and well implemented. Overlord's original polluted world is explored and Yggdrasil as a game is properly brought to spotlight. Overall, a solid 4.8/5. I only hope that the author doesn't drop this story. It has unfortunately happened with so many wonderfully budding Overlord fanfics.
I regret reading this more than Invisible Dragon. Writing was so draggy, hoping it would improve but it didn't. There's only 50 chaps and the first half of the story was MC grinding and not even in the new world where overlord takes place but instead in MC's dungeon he got from his system and Yggdrasil game. Almost no character interaction even if there is it's full of awkwardness. Power concept and system is appalling, i don't even want to write of how horrible it is. — Author's isn't even trying, this just author's SI chunni diary. I can tell how much uncaring the author about the readers. This isn't reading material. I can't believe there's more than 2 million overlord fans that had to suffer being baited into reading this. — PS: You want OVERLORD fanfic? Then you shouldn't be here. The overlord elements in this story isn't even 50%. This is a butchered story, it's not even overlord anymore! This is the most regrettable read i've had in my life.
Sorry to say that I dropped this at chapter 12. If I get the motivation back I might continue but I figured I'd go ahead and give my review. Writing quality is pretty good so 5*. I don't care about updates so 5*. Story development...is terrible. The first 10 chapters have absolutely nothing relevant to Overlord in them and mostly just talk about his Gamer abilities and his first Zombie ID dungeon. Chapter 11ish he finally starts the game of YGGDRASIL and then...immediately has a 1 year time skip and starts talking about his Gamer abilities again. Overall, since this is an OVERLORD story, I give story development 2*. If I wanted to read a story about only Gamer stuff, I would have just looked up a Gamer story and not an OVERLORD one. Character design is...bad. The MC makes extremely superficial decisions on EVERYTHING. Wants to be a 'battle mage' or something like that? Puts all stat points in INT, ignoring mana regen and anything to do with the word 'BATTLE'. No problem though, because later on the author just gives him skills that multiply his mana capacity and gives him a permanent 1% mana regen per second. Basically, the MC thinks like a child. As for other characters? There aren't any. None relevant enough to mention at least, except maybe his AI gamer system called Ava or something. Basically the entire story is just MC internally monologuing. World Background is...abysmal. Author seems much more focused on MC's Gamer abilities and giving him new and extremely OP powers instead of looking up facts about the OVERLORD universe. He created a random (likely not Canon compliant) starting race, created spells out of nowhere (ignoring the nice tier spell list that can be found easily), and many other small details that any true fan of Overlord would pick up on immediately. Author is much too focused on the Gamer power MC received for his wish and basically ignores everything to do with the Overlord universe (up to chapter 12 at least). Even when he puts information about it, he simply summarizes something and half the time his information is wrong. Overall I give World Background 2*. Sadly, none of this is even my primary problem with this fic. My main problem is with the Gamer system. You see, he cannot use the Gamer system (gifted to him by god) within YGGDRASIL for some reason. Author states it is because the game is "In his brain" but that makes no sense at all. How is the Gamer system tied to the MC? Is it only tied to his body? Wouldn't that mean he would lose it when he goes to the New World if that is the case? IF he keeps it when going to the New World then the ONLY possibility is that it is tied to his soul or consciousness, which makes sense considering its origins. Since that is the case, why wouldn't it work inside the game as well? It should be tied to his soul, which should be tied to his mind/consciousness so it should work, but it doesn't. On top of that, Author has decided to mix up the 2 systems when he goes to the New World for some reason, making ratios for what stats are worth and such. Overall, it is just a confusing mess. Not to mention that Author clearly didn't want to deal with the Wisdom stat at all so it makes me wonder why he even included it in the status menu. Overall, I only recommend this to readers who REALLY enjoy ONLY Gamer systems and not plot. In 12 chapters the plot can be summed up as this: 1. MC gets power. 2. MC goes to new world. 3. MC starts a game. That is basically it. 12 chapters worth of talking about his powers and starting a game with a 1 year time skip and a lot of summarizing. D I S A P P O I N T I N G !
เปิดเผยสปอยเลอร์
It's a good book but a very bad Overlord ff. A lot of things don't make sense if you know Overlord better than just seeing the anime and knowing the anime for a few mistakes. Spoilers from now on: Just two bugs, one of which should also be known to anime shivers. Mistake one: Even if you can argue about it. The Mc starts with the Arcane Demon race class. And here it is arguable whether this racial class makes sense in Overlord. First of all it is difficult to say whether it makes sense as a starting class because most of the demon classes known in Overlord are further developments of the imp class and Arcane Demon from the description sounds too powerful for a basic class. I think it sounds more like an advanced class on. But the real problem is that the demon race in Overlord is divided into the devil and demon classes, with the devil classes being more about magic and manipulation and the demon classes being more about melee and brute force. So even if the racial class is a start class, it should be called Arcane devil instead of Arcane Demon. Second flaw: This is undeniably a flaw that anime shivers should be aware of as well. The MC claims that there is no other way to manipulate time in Yggdrasil than cash shop items. That's just not true there is time magic in Yggdrasil which Ains also uses in his fight against Gazef in the anime. There are also more things that don't make sense but the comment is already so long that I don't think anyone reads it.
trash author who ruined the whole overlord story becz of his sh*tty righteous behaviour
it's not even overlord anymore. The mc just took all of the npc characters and changed them so much that it's more of an overlord looking book than it is an overlord fanfic
more I'm crying from not reading more penny wise will come for us if I don't get more chapters. -------------------------------------------------------
Le MC prend la place de momonga = auteur lossssseeeerrrrr [img=faceslap][img=faceslap][img=faceslap][img=faceslap][img=faceslap][img=faceslap][img=faceslap][img=faceslap][img=faceslap][img=faceslap]
Tilll now I have read 45 chapters and I am enjoying it a lot, the development is really good and the way the autor is making the ex NPCs to learn new skills and adquire more fighting experience is amazing, please keep the good job autor-san
author there will be ntr? sometimes novel without romance tag, mc shares his wife so i just want to ask (ﾉ≧∇≦)ﾉ m.......,...............
I Really Like It So Far, The Writing Quality Is Great, And Story Development Is Great , And I Hope You Don't Drop This Because A Lot Of Overlord Fanfics Get Dropped And Is The Mc Gonna Go To Another World? Keep Up The Good Work
Enjoying the novel so far.[img=recommend] I hope you keep up the GOOD WORK.[img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update]
excellent travail, bonne ponctualité au vus de l'histoire le développement du héros est cohérent . vraiment merci !!!!!
I can't wait anymore [img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update]
Good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good