I have a new problem.
No, it's not particularly dangerous or annoying. I've been feeling quite nice and free since I pulled Tiamat out.
It may have been suicidal and made me a target for the powers that be but it puts me at complete ease.
...I can't say I appreciate that.
Knowing I could've had my shit kicked in at any moment gave me a sense of urgency that let my genius thrive. But oh well, I'm a kid.
Foresight isn't my thing.
Right, anyway, I'm standing outside school at the moment.
There's only a few days to go till winter vacation starts and I can get started on how to inherit the Matou assets but... Sakura hasn't woken up yet, for some reason. She overexerted herself a little too much with helping me out and my lack of knowledge about the magic side of things is showing itself now.
She'll be fine with rest, right?
I hope so.
Then there's the current problem I'm faced with.
Tiamat followed me to school... and we're drawing a lot of attention from kids and their parents.
I can practically feel my hard, ptsd earned infamy dying out because she's doting too much.
Not to say I don't appreciate the two 'balloons' settled on top of my cute shota head.
Suck on that Kazuma.
Even Shirou looks slightly embarrassed though so that's saying something.
"Tiamat... how about you go home and I'll come bac-"
I stopped myself seeing the tears welling up in her eyes and pursed my lips.
What the hell am I supposed to do here?
I'm Shinjiberg goddamit.
This school was going to be a candy crack empire.
It was going to fund my projects!
I even had plans for branching out into other junior schools using proxies.
Wait, can't Tiamat freely alter her size?
"Shinji, you have to tell her... it's for her own good." Shirou tugged on my shirt sleeve, avoiding looking at Tiamat, "We're going to be late for class at this rate."
"Shut up, let me think."
"...I guess people can't change that easily." Shirou sighed, referring to inferior Shinji.
Dear Shirou, you're the one person that doesn't get to talk about people changing.
"Hey." I looked up.
Huh, the sight of Tiamat peering down between her own 'assets' was... ehem, nevermind.
"Can't you change sizes?"
"Yess?"
Stop looking confused, you're supposed to be the mother.
Put two and two together woman.
"Then." I held my shirt pocket open and looked at her with dead eyes, "Jump in."
She tilted her head slightly before her eyes lit up and she nodded enthusiastically, "Shinji is... very smart."
Duh, I'm a mad scientist.
And like that, I gained a pocket mommy.
Of course, I made sure to lead her to a dark alley before shoving her inside, professionals have standards.
-
"You squeak to the teachers, it's going to be your parents next."
I sat on a chair with one leg crossed over the other, sucking on a juice box like a real man as I looked down at my first buyer like he was trash, "This is the kind of candy you can't find easily."
I held up a pink wrapper before tossing it to a nearby table.
I bought this shit at the local convenience store but they don't need to know that.
The kid nodded his head up and down, beads of sweat rolling down his forehead, "Y-Yes, I'm sorry."
Shirou stood at the door, acting as the lookout.
"Now go." I shooed the kid off with my hand.
Brokie.
"And spread the word, there's a new dealer in town. The words for any kind of deal are 'What colour is your candy?'" I spoke as he scurried away, pockets filled with all kinds of candy, "Strawberry, mango, pineapple, all kinds of flavours, chewy, hard, I'm the guy."
Of course, any reasonable person would be able to understand that this is just me killing time at school.
I'll probably end up dropping out and focus on tech more once I get rid of Zouken.
"Shinji... I'm not sure I want to do this." Shirou spoke once the kid was gone, looking hesitant.
Dear Shirou, this is the kind of talk that tells me you're gonna be a brokie for your whole life.
"Come on man, we're teaching them a good life lesson." I explained calmly, tugging on one of my blue bangs, "Never let a guy with this kind of hair punk you... And besides, they're happy and I'm happy."
"...But, isn't this too much?"
His light brown eyes moved to the stack of bills lying next to me.
Yeah, private school, dumb rich kids.
A lot of allowances.
A lot of profit.
Who'd have thought.
"They're putting daddy's dirt money to good use. Come on, you think guys this rich have their cash a 100% clean?" I shrugged, "It's for a good cause."
"...What good cause would that be?" Shirou prodded thoughtfully, clearly having a realisation about how the world wasn't just black and white from my shoddy excus-... er, wisdom.
I smiled like the innocent shota I am, "Me of course. What better cause is there than helping an underprivileged genius that might go on to save the planet or invent the cure to cancer or something?"
"Shinji... the Matou are one of the richest families in the city." Shirou deadpanned, "You're giving the money to charity."
You aren't supposed to sweat the small stuff bro.
"No. It's mine."
I stood in front of the money.
Shinji might have a shit body but we're kids, you're shorter than me... There's no way you can logically overpower me Shirou.
Our 'fight' was interrupted by Tiamat popping her little head out of my pocket, she put one of her little hands to her cheeks and tilted her head curiously, "Shinjii... what is... candy? Is it... good? You have... given a lot..."
Holding up a hand to stop Shirou from approaching me, I reached into my pants and pulled out the strawberry flavoured one I'd been saving for myself. With a sigh, I popped it out and held it out to the mini mommy on my finger.
"How I... What do I... do?" She looked up at me after grabbing the candy with both her hands.
Dear Tiamat, stop snuggling the piece of food.
Cuteness will not make me forget that you almost killed my baby.
"You put it in your mouth?"
"Hmm..." The 'Evil of Man' opened her mouth and tried to swallow it but... of course, it was too small. So she just bit into it with her fanged teeth.
Tiamat narrowed her eyes, moving it around in her mouth before the crosses in her eyes lit up, "Mmmm~."
"Shirou, we're keeping her."
He nodded at me, regarding her with a faint smile.
On an unrelated note, it turned out that teacher I used as a scapegoat tried to commit suicide but got saved by his housekeeper.
How sad.
-
When we got home, Shirou just went off to do whatever he usually did as a housewife while I went to check on Sakura.
I stood outside the room, took a deep breath and walked in to find her peacefully sleeping on Shirou's bed... which I may or may not have guilt tripped him into giving it to her.
She was still wearing her school uniform, because both of us were dudes and wouldn't dare change her.
The only reason I have peace is because she helped me access the Imaginary Number Space.
She played a massive role in my suicidal attempt.
I owe her beyond just her being my sister and it being my responsibility to feed her.
"This is Shinjiii's... sister?" Tiamat asked curiously from my pocket, peering at the sleeping child.
"Yeah." I smiled slightly, but then paused, "Why the hell are you still in my pocket?"
"It is... con-... coven... convi... covenent? I can always... be with... you... to take... care."
Dear Tiamat, please grow up.
It's convenient.
Why do I think she might attack someone if I express even slight annoyance with them?
Huh.
Anyway, I walked over to my sister and sat down beside her, putting my hand against her forehead, "I'll definitely feed you."
Tiamat looked up at me, and then down at the sleeping Sakura before nodding determinedly.
She then jumped out of my pocket and increased in size until she was-
"...Did you just become a loli?"
The Beast eyed me confusedly, "Lo-li?"
Shaking her head, she put a hand on her head and then on mine, "Same as... Shinji. Neck will... not hurt."
Dear Tiamat, please stop accommodating me so much.
It's getting concerning.
"I like your real form more though."
In the blink of an eye, the Beast returned to the appearance I'd found her in and smiled at me, "Thank... you..." Rolling up her non-existent sleeves, Tiamat leaned over Sakura and placed a hand on her chest, "There are... insects?"
You know, I've just learnt something.
Tiamat should NOT be allowed to wear sundresses.
She was wearing a pale green one up until now but her figure makes it stick to her thic thighs and makes her badonkadonks and ass jut out... It's a good thing she's wearing her weird underwear under it.
But I'm an innocent twelve year old.
There are no impure thoughts in my mind.
"Can you kill them? And not harm her?"
See, I'm more concerned about Sakura.
Tiamat nodded her head, and tapped my chest, "One is near her...heart."
"But you can get rid of them and fix the damage?" I asked blankly.
I'd have liked to build something like that device from Resident Evil 4 that killed the parasites inside of Ashley and Leon but that'll take time... which I'm pressed for now.
I'm not childish enough to expose her to danger just to feel good about myself.
Maybe someday.
But not today.
For now, I'll choose the literal Goddess of Creation over technology.
Tiamat, why do you look so proud?
This was a conclusion I reached by myself.
"Shooould...I?"
"Do it. I trust you."
Who'd have guessed the being that shaped life could tamper with it too?
Wait...
Wait a second, does that mean she can augment my body too?
That said, I wonder where my AI ran off to?
-
So I'm taking it you guys don't like this much?