บท 5: Dance of Shadows and Secrets

"I didn't expect it would. Just come. Give me two days."

"I said I'd think about it."

Ez nodded and turned to leave. Just before he reached the door, I asked one last question.

"Does she know you're asking me to come home?"

Our mother.

"No. I didn't want to complicate things any more than they already would. She's traveling right now."

Nothing else was said.

TWO

cress

I pulled off my extra layers and tossed them toward the wall in the back. My body was sore, which made me regret the additional hours I had put in that morning prior to the rest of the dancers arriving.

I was the one expected to shine. As the principal dancer of Liberté Abstraite, I would never be granted the luxury of having an off day. I accepted my role and position with grace because what else was there?

Complaining got you nowhere because everyone had a struggle or story. In the grand scheme of things, mine was no more important than theirs.

"Two rows…" Kenneth Shilo, the company's director's voice, cut through the low murmurs of chatter that flowed from the dancers. Twenty corps de ballet and two principals—me and my partner for the performance, Adler Li. "Li. Devereaux. Up front. Let's go." His hands met in a sharp manner. Three quick claps His first attempt at order If we didn't move, he would no doubt begin yelling obscenities.

"Cress…" He took the spot in front of me. The smooth, icy delivery of my name was a prep for the insults that were no doubt on the tip of his tongue.

I was his favorite. To antagonize, that was. My family's name and wealth either brought me favor or criticism. With Shilo, it was always the latter until he'd needed my family to cut a check to the company to fund whatever new production he wanted to imagine.

"Yes."

"Your steps have been off this week. Will you be ready for this weekend?" I tensed my jaw and bit down on the inside to keep my words and tone even. I was in no way interested in a sparring match with him. Not today.

"I will."

"Good. Let's see what you've got." He turned sharply, giving me his back. I rolled my eyes and caught Li in my peripheral view when I was focused again, which had me glancing at the mirror. His smile was smug, which meant he'd read my thoughts. A quick wink followed, and I let go of a ghost of a smile as I settled into my position.

"From the top, people. Let's try to present ourselves like the professionals we are and not the fumbling amateurs I've been dealing with all week."

Shilo stepped away from the three-line formation. Li's six-foot, lean athletic frame immediately curved into position. His facial features were schooled, dulling his black and Asian ethnicity and drawing an emotionless palate to his face.

I inhaled and moved to him, leaning into his back with my shoulder blades, preparing for the music to begin so I would be ready to lift into pointe and extend my leg at the perfect angle.

From the corner, the pianist came to life, and my mind shifted into the space of natural ability. Muscle memory guided my motions. I rarely had to think; I only did. Once I learned a routine, it became as simple as breathing, guided by the notes that danced through the air, then my head.

With a trained ease, I moved through the movements in time with the music. This was my happy place. My escape. Even here, where I wasn't allowed to be as free as I liked to be, I was still able to get lost. The music poured through me, and I took flight.

"Cress, a moment..."

I almost made it.

I wasn't in the mood to deal with Shilo. After repeating our duet and my solo performance no less than ten times, I was ready to go home, soak, and rest for the evening.

"Yes…" I paused just outside the studio, tugging my bag further up my shoulder.

"You were here early?"

"I was, yes."