บท 21: You never even said love to me!
Two days passed...
Angelica had returned to Charlie's mansion and during that time she did not communicate or meet Charlie because he returned to the hotel after taking her to the mansion. the girl felt very dilemma, wanted to find out where the man was and wanted to know what he was doing but she always realized that she was nothing to him. and again, she felt so lonely like something was missing from her that every night she always hoped that he would come back.
'Or maybe he went to his old place because he didn't want to see me because I always pressed him to label our relationship?' she asked herself while looking at the night sky which looked so beautiful while her body felt so cool from the gentle breeze because now she was on the side terrace facing the swimming pool.
Drett... Drett....
Angelica immediately took her cell phone which was stored in the pocket of her gray trousers that matched her clothes, then saw an incoming call from Kate, then answered it.
"Kate?"
"Angelica... Tomorrow is the weekend... I was planning to meet you," Kate said over the phone, her voice sounded relaxed and there was another sound like she was tidying up something.
"That's good, I'm very lonely here," replied Angelica languidly.
"Hmm, where is your sweetheart?"
"I don't know where he is…." We didn't communicate or see each other again after he took me back to his mansion," Angelica explained sadly, feeling like she missed Charlie so much and worried that he was just playing with her and wouldn't return to being sweet to her again, and his previous sweet attitude..maybe it's just bullshit. "I think I took it too far about his attitude towards me... I was too bad to be with him," she continued in exasperation.
"He must have come back because that is where he lives," Kate replied, sounding very calm. "now I will go home. I am very tired….I think I'll go to sleep soon and wake up late tomorrow," she continued.
"Okay, stay safe... See you tomorrow."
"Okay, don't be sad anymore..."
the phone line was disconnected, Angelica exhaled roughly and looked at her cellphone which had no new photos at all, and no other contact numbers apart from her mother, Kate, and Charlie but she was always hesitant to contact them.
'If I call mommy, then I will always be a liar if I call Charlie... I don't know what I will say... I always remember that I am nothing to him,' she thought sadly.
Feeling bored, Angelica immediately returned to her room and prepared to sleep. She played a song on her phone, Lana Del Rey's Say Yes to Heaven, then put it next to her head hugged the bolster, and closed her eyes.
"I got my eyes on you," whispered Angelica, remembering Charlie's eyes which always showed sincerity and pleading, but sometimes implied fear. 'I should have realized, maybe I'm just being a sweetener for him. If he thinks I'm important and special, he definitely won't let me wait and will tell me about his past... I'm not everything to him... I have to always remember that,' she thought with a blank look, then closed her eyes again.
kept listening to songs until several songs changed, finally, Angelica fell asleep, and at that moment suddenly the door opened.
Charlie was silent, looked at Angelica who was asleep, then glanced at the cell phone next to her head. the man wearing gray trousers and a white shirt immediately closed the door again, then approached the girl and sat beside her, looking at her sadly while stroking her beautiful hair.
'Two days I tried to stay away from you, but I felt like a bad guy. Honestly, I don't want to bring you into the suffering I feel but I also can't let you go... I don't want anything bad to happen to you... You should know that having ties to me will only put you in deeper trouble...but I can't tell you my reasons now because maybe you will immediately walk away and think that I'm a jerk,' he thought anxiously, then Looked down to kiss Angelica's temple.
Cup....
That small kiss immediately awakened her soul, making her open her eyes and glance at the figure sitting beside her.
"Charlie," she whispered.
Charlie smiled faintly. "Hey..."
Angelica was silent, looking at Charlie awkwardly, not knowing whether to act like someone who had made love to her like a lover or just casually, but she missed him and wanted to hug him. Then she wanted to ask him about where he had been for two days.
"I thought you were gone," she said.
"No, I'm not gone... I'm here," Charlie replied with a warm gaze. "And I didn't come back before because I was very busy. I wasn't just at the hotel but visiting my company which is managed by my sister... and there are still many more things that I need to finish..."
Angelica smiled faintly, realizing that Charlie was so rich.
"Why?" Charlie asked.
"Nothing..." Angelica looked away and turned her back to Charlie.
."Hey, answer me," asked Charlie as he pushed aside the pillow then lay down next to Angelica and hugged her from behind. "You have to tell me, baby," he whispered then pushed back her hair to kiss the crook of her neck.
Angelica closed her eyes, feeling relieved because Charlie was starting to show his gentleness which seemed to break her awkwardness.
"I miss you," whispered Charlie.
"I thought you left because you were bored of me... I thought I was just being used by you as a momentary gratification... I'm very worried but I'm trying to introspect myself, realizing that I'm nothing to you and I don't deserve to be anyone to you," said Angelica as she felt Charlie's hand caressing her arm.
"You shouldn't think that….You know I like you and I already said that we have a relationship... We admit that in our hearts," Charlie replied with a frown. "I will never get bored of you, you are not just my satisfaction but you are the source of my happiness. .."
."Maybe you're saying this because you want intimacy now... If you're satisfied then you'll just leave, without saying a word, then you'll only come back when you miss and want intimacy again and seduce me again."
.Angelica's words immediately made Charlie raise his head and look at her somewhat annoyed.
"Why are you talking about me being a jerk who likes to play with women?" he asked.
Angelica turned her head and glanced at Charlie. "But I said the truth..."
"What?"
"You said this was a commitment in our heart, you said you liked me and I was the source of your happiness... But you left without telling me again... as if you didn't think about me here worrying about you, especially since you were hurt before," said Angelica, trying not to hesitate and be embarrassed to express what was in her heart. "Maybe I'm too passionate for you... But I have self-esteem, I have feelings. .."
Charlie narrowed his eyes. "I don't understand..."
"You act like we don't commit the heart as you said," explained Angelica then sat down. ."When a man is sure that he has a commitment to a woman, then he will always contact her, even if it's just to say good morning or say that everything is fine... I expected that because you said we commit our hearts..."
"I'm just too busy," whispered Charlie.
"And actually, no matter how busy a man is, if he feels he cares and loves a woman, he will take the time to contact her or just say hi and say everything is fine," said Angelica then shook her head. ."But I realize I don't have the right to demand you for that because this is just a commitment in my heart, a strange commitment... And you never said you love me," she continued then looked away, feeling embarrassed for being too demanding of Charlie but just wanting him to reassure her.
Charlie was silent, not expecting that all Angelica wanted was the word love.
"You only like me, you don't love me," whispered Angelica.
"I do...."
"No, you aren't..."
"I'm just doubt to say it... I haven't said that to anyone in 2 years," Charlie explained.
"Then there's no need to say if you don't want to... That means we're not worthy of a commitment," replied Angelica, glancing at Charle with a disappointed look. "You still doubt me..."
"No..." Charlie shook his head.
"You are doubtful, it means you are not sure about commitment from the heart... And your doubts also make me lazy to agree with the commitment from the heart that you mean! I will only stay here as your friend and also your bitch!" Angelica emphasized then hurriedly got up from the bed. She walked towards the window, then opened the curtains to see the dimly lit view outside. 'What's this? Did I go too far just now? I felt like I was pressuring him to say he loved me even though it was his right to love me or not... I should have known myself...Maybe he wants my body but that doesn't mean he wants me to be his love,' she thought angrily, feeling like she wanted to be angry with herself.
Charlie was silent, looking at Angelica who was lost in thought.
'Love... Does it matter? saying that to you will only make me keep remembering how I kept saying that to Isabella. What if it would only make our closeness a disaster? What if Gustave and his people found out? They could hurt her?'
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