บท 63: Sus Cousin Call

"Now remember Himi, we are not letting Melissa know that we're villains." I repeat myself for the fourth time, just to make sure she understands how important this is. Unlike the Yagis, I actually still consider her family!

Himi rolls her eyes, crossing her arms with a huff. "I know already! I got it the first time! Just make sure you introduce me as your girlfriend properly!"

I put a hand to my chest in mock offense. "Of course! What, do you think that I'd introduce you as an insane girl who took my unresponsive form home with her to drain of fluids!?"

"You absolutely would!"

I chuckle in agreement as I turn to the computer. "Yeah, I totally would." The best part is that it would be technically correct too, the best kind of correct!

I throw a quick glance at the room through the camera, making sure that my cousin won't see anything that might encourage her to cut me out of her life. The blade wall, since we have more sharp objects than just knives, is the same wall the computer is against so that's ok. The bed is clean and made, no signs of last night's activities anywhere on it. I can only imagine what she'd think if she saw the state it was in.

Who knew that finger painting would cause such a big mess and stain the sheets so badly?

Speaking of Eri, the girl-acorn I rescued a few days ago, she should be taking a nap. Or Shiggy is teaching her the joys of video games again, though I did tell him to keep horror games away from her for now. We don't want her unknown quirk activating from a jump scare or something.

I take a deep breath, working up my courage to press the call button. Funny, killing people is much less nerve-wracking than calling the cousin you haven't contacted in more than a year.

Seeing me hesitate, Himi groans and leans over me, pressing the button herself. "You've been chickening out of this for three days! Suck it up!"

I huff, leaning my head back and eyeing her. "Pretty sure that sucking is your job."

"Only out of the bedroom," she snarks back with a smirk. "Inside it's both our jobs."

I smirk back. "How about-"

"Izuku, what the hell!?"

I startle, jerking forward while Himi laughs behind me. On the screen is my cousin, Melissa Shield, with the parts of her face not covered by her hands a bright red from embarrassment. Doesn't stop her from peeking through her fingers though.

I clear my throat, hyper-aware of the fact that she's not the only one blushing. Though now that I think of it, I'm pretty sure the last time I blushed was back on Himi's birthday when she said she wanted me as a present. Or was it the first time she turned into me while saying I'm the only man either of us need in our love-life?

Either way, actually being embarrassed is a rare thing for me. So, obviously, Himi does anything she can think of to try and get me to blush. Which apparently now includes talking about our sex life in front of my cousin.

"Um, hi Melissa!" I give a little wave while trying to banish my blush, hoping that she'll let me change the subject. "It's, well, been a long time? How are you? Blow anything up?"

She doesn't respond for a moment, taking a few deep breaths and letting herself calm down. Once her face is a normal color, she thankfully takes my olive branch and lets the previous topic fade away.

"Things have been good! And yes, I have. You know that good inventors blow up something at least once a week."

I chuckle, Himi folding her arms on top of my head and resting her own on them as she studies Melissa's appearance. "Yeah, yeah. 'It jump starts the creative process'. I'm pretty sure you just love the fact that it exacerbates your dad."

A mischievous grin plays across her lips, one that she tries to hide by reaching up and adjusting her glasses. "I certainly have no clue where you would get that idea. Why would I want to irritate my dad?"

I roll my eyes, tapping my chin as I decide to treat it as an actual question for Himi's benefit. I wonder if Melissa hasn't asked about her because she's still embarrassed? "If I had to pick a reason, it would probably be that quirk enhancing device you designed, then he claimed credit for."

She scowls for a brief moment before schooling her expression into one of disinterest and shrugs. "Like he said, it's a revolutionary device that could change the world. If people figured out that someone who wasn't even an adult at the time designed it, then they would have come after me. No matter that I live on I-Island, jealous scientists would have helped them."

I close my eyes as I nod understandingly. "Yes, yes. You've said that all before." My eyes open and I level my stare at her. "You've also said how much you hate it when people try to pass off the work of someone else as their own. We both know that you don't like it, and I thought we established that you don't have to lie to me. "

She maintains eye contact for a moment before sighing and looking down. "You're right, I'm sorry. It's just that it's been so long, and I wasn't sure if you were the same. Or if you expected me to be the same."

I chuckle darkly, choking it off quickly when she looks up and furrows her brows. "Trust me, whether or not you change doesn't matter to me. So long as you're happy, then I'm happy." I smile brightly. "So no more lying, got it?"

She chuckles. "No more lying." Her smile turns cat-like, and I have to briefly remind myself that Himi is with me and hasn't ever gotten any of Melissa's blood. "In that case, care to introduce me to your girlfriend?"

I smirk back at her, her attempt at making me flustered failing horribly as I gesture at the little vampire using me as a headrest. "Gladly. May I introduce to you Himiko Toga, my girlfriend of almost a year. The person I'm eternally grateful to wake up next to everyday."

"Oh hush, you." Himi lightly taps my head and I see her blush on the camera despite her looking away. "I'm the one who's glad to wake up next to you." She looks back, making eye contact with Melissa as her voice and smile turn playful, matching the look Melissa has. "Of course, that's not to say I'm not grateful when you keep me awake, either~."

Aaaand we're back to blushing. At least this time it's all three of us! I clear my throat, deciding that the best way to get rid of the sudden awkwardness would be to bring up the status of the quirkless. Two's a coincidence but three's a pattern, and all that. And Melissa will make four! But before I can, I see Melissa's eyes widen.

"DO THE TWO OF YOU HAVE A KID!?"

""HUH!?""

We both whirl around in confusion, only to see Eri staring back with a scared expression, clutching the gamepad between her hands hard enough to turn them white. We've made a little progress with her knowing she's safe here, but she has the same self-deprecating personality that I used to have before I met Himi, so she often thinks she's a bother.

But the two of us make sure she knows she's not by wrapping our arms around her from both sides, whispering reassurances in her ears that we're not mad that she showed up during the call, and that we're always happy to help her with anything or see whatever she wants to show us. It takes a few minutes, but she eventually manages to calm down enough that we can ask her what she wanted.

Not needed, but wanted. The difference is slight, but the distinction is important for her to know that she can come to us whenever she wants, not just when she feels like she has no other choice. It certainly helps that it's true. I'll never treat this traumatized little girl the way the Yagis treated me, and if I ever did I'd put my trust in the League to find a way to permanently murder me with all due prejudice. And then some.

"I…I wanted to show you a cute thing…" Eri says quietly, trailing off in a clear show of insecurity.

"We'd love to see it!" I say with a voice full of excitement, accompanied by Himi's rapid nodding. "We both love cute things, just look at Himi and yourself if you don't believe me!"

Her lips twitch for a moment in an almost-smile before she shows us what she was playing. On the screen is Kirby, and for a moment the image is superimposed with the girl from the UA Entrance Exam, forcing me to hold back a snort of laughter. There's absolutely no way I'll make our little girl-acorn feel bad like that!

"They're totally cute!" Himi says enthusiastically. "They're one of my favorite characters in that game!"

This time I can't hold back a snort, but I make sure Eri knows who it's directed at. "Yeah, but only because you both love sucking."

She snorts back, leaning in to give me a peck on the cheek. "Too late, the time for those jokes have passed, go back three spaces and return to your cousin."

I blink, having forgotten what we were doing for the moment. Looking back I'm relieved to see that Melissa is still on the call. She's leaning her cheek on her hand and has a dopey smile on her face as she watches us. Seeing me looking back, she coughs, clearing her throat before she speaks.

"Well, I'm happy that you're happy. It looks like you're going to be good parents." She blinks as she looks up. "Speaking of, do you know why Izumi was acting weird when she called me before?"

I tense slightly, working to hide it as I pat Eri on the head and send her and Himi off to play together. I close the door behind them as they talk about their favorite colors of Kirby, returning to my spot in front of the computer as I try to put on a nonchalant air. "Can't say that I do. When exactly did she call you though?"

She frowns. "It was a bit before UA's Entrance Exam. Shouldn't you know that? Even if the two of you are fighting, you do live together."

I clear my throat, preparing my series of half-truths and redirections. "Actually, I moved out around the same time I met Himi. So I wouldn't know. I did…talk…with her recently, but it didn't come up."

She blinks at me in surprise that's echoed in her voice. "You moved out? How!? Why!? And wait, how are you paying for a place to live? And with a girlfriend and a kid? Do you need help?"

I chuckle, the offer for help reminding me of all those trips to I-Island where she asked me if I needed help with organizing my quirk analysis. I didn't show them to people other than Shoko though, and she got used to the way they kind of blurred together in places, so I didn't really need any of the gadgets she offered to make.

"Yes, I moved out. And it was actually pretty easy, Himi and I both work for some eccentric rich old guy and help out his son with some of his projects. They want to change society, and we support him in that. The pay is good, and they provide a living space, as well as covering all the bills. We aren't the only ones either, he basically has a nanny who's been with him for years."

I smile fondly. "They may not be the most…stable of people, with the exception of the nanny, but it's fun. I don't regret meeting them for a moment."

I shake my head free of nostalgic memories of all the non-murderous/violent stuff we've done. Like that time when we tried to vacuum up Kurogiri's mist to see what's underneath only for him to drop us in a dump. Or that time Himi and I numbed Shiggy's hands and made him think they vanished while he was sleeping. There's also the time where they stitched together some of my discarded body parts to make a puppet of me that we had a little play with.

I was actually a little worried about that one. If my quirk were to somehow activate after the parts were put together…

But thankfully they didn't, and I blended them into slush before selling the resulting…drink? Smoothie?...on a website for those with cannibalistic quirks.

"As for the why…" I trail off, this actually being a perfect opportunity to bring up quirks. "There's actually something I found out," I say with full seriousness as I meet her eyes. Sensing the shift in mood, she straightens up, her own eyes gaining a focus they lacked before.

I lean forward, interlacing my fingers. "I found out that having an extra toe joint does not mean someone is quirkless."

She's silent for a moment, her eyes wide. There's a few reactions I was expecting to see when I brought this up. Shock. Disbelief. Hope.

But what I didn't expect, is fear.

She frantically looks around before leaning forward, her hands presumably flying across her keyboard. "How did- No, you've always been smart. Especially when it comes to quirks. But then- No, too dangerous. Then that means-"

She falls silent as she focuses on whatever she's doing, and it takes a few minutes for her to be done. The whole time I'm just staring at her with my mouth hanging open. Eventually, she leans back, breathing a sigh of relief.

"Thank Science that you have a secure computer. It would have been bad, otherwise." She blinks. "Wait, why do you have a computer that can't be traced and firewalls that could rival some of the less dangerous I-Island servers?"

"Uuuhhh…" Eloquent, I know.

She waves her hand. "Not important, you're right." She takes a steadying breath, casting one last furtive glance around her. "It's too dangerous to talk about this online or over the phone, even if the devices are secure. I'll send you some tickets to the I-Island Expo at the start of summer so you and the others can come up."

She shakes her head. "In the meantime, whatever you do- DO NOT TELL ANYONE! Even if you completely trust them." She rubs at the spot between her eyebrows, suddenly seeming much more tense. "I-" She swallows. "I'll explain when you get here. Just-just trust me until then, ok?"

And with that she ends the call, leaving me staring at the screen with confusion-filled eyes, no idea what just happened. Really, I only know two things.

Melissa already knew the truth about the quirkless.

And there's even more to it than I thought.