บท 22: Chapter 20
Waking up to sun on my face is hard, but the amount of rest feels like its not enough. I didn't bother much to know what I have to do, as I try to fall asleep again, better to be asleep than to being here. Falling back asleep is hard, my body feels rested but I just want to sleep. After a while of the covers of the bed not being enough to get enough heat on me I slowly drift off but a knock on my door gets my attention.
"Cindy Moon?" The voice of a woman arouses me from my attempt to sleep.
"Yeah?"
"You need to present yourself to breakfast, you recieved your schedule." She said in a matter of fact tone.
"Not hungry." While I'm starving, I'm actively trying to forget about it.
"You need it for your treatment, or else we will have to get you discharged and the person who placed you here will be dissapointed. I
reluctantly get up, the woman narrows her eyes.
"I think you should get a shower, you need to be presentable." She says as she takes a towel from a drawer. "Here, I will wait so you're not late to your visit with your doctor." Her tone is a no nonesense that clearly is caring enough to show she wants to help. Ever so slowly I get up and in less than five minutes I'm out of the shower due to her insistence. When we walk down the halway she explains about what I need to do as well as what I can do. From using a computer, my phone and the small library they have.
The good thing they told me is that I can eat more, with notice that I have to ingest certain amount of calories necesary. 'Thank you Clint for that.' After all I still have the small scab on my stomach and side that are now just big but slowly getting better. Not even ten minutes after having a meh breakfast of eggs and bacon, I'm standing in front of a wooden door that looks menacing enough to not open.
Hesitating as the knot in my stomach reaches my throat, making it hard to even move. I don't need help, I'm good, I'm healthy, if I wasn't healthy I would be the ... first to-kn...ow. Looking at my shoes, at my pants, the color on the wall... the place I'm standing right now. 'I think I need help.' Opening the door surprises me that its a carpeted room with wooden bookshelves, that typical leather chair and a recliner chair with someone sitting on it. The room filled with warm yellow light, the room is cool enough to be comfortable and the light of the sun help a little. Yet I can't help to be at edge.
"Cindy, right?" The voice of theman comes at a cool tone, like he's greeting a friend. He's has a dark gray fedora on, with a gray blaiser, white button up shirt, with black jeans and sneakers. He looks smart and sharp but goofy, somehow making it work.
"..." I only nod in response as walks up to me and offers a handshake that I reluctantly take.
"Come in! Come in, you are most welcome here." The smile never leaves his face and motions to the couch, now I have a good look at the room, it has an award and a cetificate from harvard and another from Stanford.
"You went to Harvard?"
"Yup, double major one in psychiatry and another on psychology, with a masters on Toxicology."
"Whoa, that is quite the resume doc."
"Psh, its nothing; my wife, she's amazing. Double major from MIT, in robotics and mechatronics, with a mastery on Mechanics in Brown." My ears perked up hearing Brown.
"What does she do?"
"Custom vehicles for different automovile industries, yup she's amazing." He said as he took a seat. "Oh, right, didn't introduced myself; I always get tangled up and rant about my wife being amazing at what she does, my name is Tobias Curtis." He said in a friendly tone.
"I'm Cindy Moon, but I think you already know that..." I replied as I looked around the room, my enhanced sensing does help in noticing if there is something in the room, but I can't see or hear cameras. My search takes a few minutes as I look at every nook and cranny in the room.
"Soo- did you found what you were looking for?" He interrupts my thoughts as I look at the special socks with sticky soles.
"Are you with shield?" His eyes narrow as he looks at me.
"Shield? As in the government?"
"Yes."
"No, I'm not, I mean I used to be part of a consultation team that worked with public safety but not anymore."
"Oh... okay." I stay silent for a bit as I ignore the situation, I don't really want to talk to him, how do I know he is a good person?
"Is there something you want to talk about?"
"No, not really." He looks relatable, he looks like a nice person but how do I tell him what I am? I sat there for almost and hour with a few questions here and there from Doctor Curtis that recieved a one sillabile answer from me.
"Well the hour is over, it was productive." He jokes as I get up to leave.
"Actually we have 2 hours schedule and I'm sure you don't want to be on the common area, right? You can stay for as long as you want." How does he know I won't like being there?
"Can I stay a while?"
"Sure, if you want to look at the cars passing by the street then be my guest." He motions to a chair that I can move.
"Thanks, you're nice." I take note as I move the chair, the warm sunlight is refreshing.
"Why thank you, I try. You enjoy watching the cars go by?"
"Yeah, its like every car has a person or multiple, each holding their story, like when I was little, I enjoyed watching others walk by, each holding their own conversation a little world for them, their hardships, their happiness, everyone stuck in their side of the world.
"And you're only an observer?"
"Kinda, it also helped that no one wanted to be near me." The silence of half an hour made me feel relaxed enough and he seemed to notice.
"I looked into you, you are really famous. I saw your runway walk, you looked very confident and strong and happy." He said in a light tone of voice, warm and friendly.
"Thanks, I borrowed strength that time... I-I was happy and extremely nervous" I said with a melancholic smile "My friends helped me and my back burned." I added.
"Why?" His voice clearly has doubt, its nice that someone is not judging me or has that tone of voice. Like he wants to understand me.
"I was so embarrassed that when I turned around I would be booed for how my back looks." My reply came followed by me hugging my knees as I took a seat facing him.
"And you were cheered on." He has a small smile on his lips.
"I know, amd I think you could see my reddened face."
"Did you do them to yourself?" His voice is now serious, I feel aprehensive as to not tell him but if I need help then I have to give him the full story.
"Kinda, I mean, mom did. But she-." I paused as he looked completely serious, no anger, no pity, nothing. That is comforting like he has no idea. "We had a pantry, back in the orphanage. She spent a bit of the monthly government fund on candy and sweets once a month. A box of cookies, cupcakes, candy, chocolate and other stuff. From which we could choose from." I paused as my breath trembled. "It was our rewards for getting good grades. I'm-was a straight A student. But one day it was gone, she said it broke after we left for school. Three days the pantry stood in front of everyone, report card day. We expected candy, I was ten, I was the example." I felt the overwhelming need to cry.
"It's okay, you can take your time. You don't have to speak about it if-"
"No I, you need to know everything about me to help me, right?"
"Yes but not if it hurts you. According to our schedule you and I have a talk every day for two hours, even Sundays." I let out a small huff as a light smile got caught on my face.
"The pantry looked wrong, it had razors, screws and nails sticking to the walls inside it, outside it has places for a chain to go through." His eyes twitched a little.
"She took off all my clothes in front of everyone and shoved me inside... I spent fifteen minutes in that box. I remember the fear and so much pain; I even remember the first screw and nail getting caught on my back. When the lock opened I fell onto the floor, my back bleeding heavily, she just used that alcohol used for cleaning wounds to clean my wounds which made me, cry harder, scream and piss myself and pass out." My face is warm. "I didn't do anything! But she said it was my fault." My eyes are not able to focus as the tears keep on coming. "She said that I was an example, lucky me! And no one else entered that day-" I couldn't speak anymore as I could only cry and wail. "Why me? I was a good girl! Why no one else?" I got handed tissues and kept crying and crying eventually I think I fell asleep.
The moment I woke up, I felt drool fall off my lips and lifting my head and the couch that has drool on it. Cleaning it eyes with my sleeves, I'm looking around finding the clock on the wall, telling me its three o clock. Stretching myself taking my surroundings and notice a cup of water on the small table which I promptly take and chug it down without an issue.
The water tastes so good, clear and everything, clenching and unclenching my hands they don't feel as cramped and my muscles aren't so sore anymore. I didn't notice before but the battle did take out a lot out of me, but from what I remember both with Loki and the Tower I was eating a lot more than before. Taking a seat on the couch which takes me to a line down memory lane of the last few days, a small smile grazes my lips as Clint stood there with me the entire two days to get here.
POV Change Dr. Tobias Curtis.
Looking at the file of the person that arrived 2 weeks ago is something entirely fucked up, I read the cases of the psyche behind murderers and serial killers like many others, they had small catalysts in their life, some were just plain malicious. All events in her life are just miserable, as in constant abuse, negativity and punishments. She clearly has deep emotional and psychological scars yet she still stood strong. Its genuinely impressive, others would've resulted to substances or self-mutilation.
But nothing, she's still standing tall and proud it baffles me, but she's here because she needs help and I'm absolutely trying my hardest for her to get better because no matter what she does she will undoubtedly succeed. But she's hiding something from me, its something absolutely split from her. Not a split personality or bipolarity, no... its something completely different. But she hasn't said anything in the last two weeks, only small glimpses of her life, her childhood, her mother, her friends, maternal figure and paternal figures which reminds me I have to talk to said maternal figure. Taking out the names and the phone numbers I proceed to call the first reference number a man named Clint Barton. He's the person who signed for her admission here...
"Go for Barton." His voice is clear, solid, no argument as to who I'm calling probably military background.
"Hello, I'm Doctor Tobias Curtis. I'm calling to ask about Cindy Moon, just a few quick questions if you don't mind."
"Cindy? Is she okay?" He sounds worried, the tone of his voice is clear.
"Yes, she is alright, I'm just calling about some things that came up from our consults we've had."
"Oh, sure, anything I can help with?"
"Do you have a rough estimate for the time she went homeless?"
"Yes, about seven to eight months between November and May." I quickly take notes.
"Do you know about anything about the place she was raised?"
"About the orphanage? Not much, police investigations have not found anything about that place and she won't say the address." So he IS aware of the place she grew up.
"When did you meet Cindy?"
"When she was about sixteen, I mentored her and trained her in self-defense." Not a lie but not the truth.
"Just one last question to not take your time, has she ever done or acted in an odd way aside from her usual self?"
"No." He answers immediately, there is definitely something there.
"Oh and is she allergic to any sort of medication?"
"Not that I'm aware of."
"Would you be willing to speak with me tomorrow when you visit?"
"Sure, with Cindy present or by myself?"
"It would be better with Cindy there."
"Understood." He answered immediately.
"Good, thank you and have a nice day." He hung up immediately as I stopped talking. I think he's vested her six times in the last two weeks, I'll talk to him the next time he comes by because he knows about that behavior and that behavior may be dangerous. I think just antidepressants aren't enough, well now I got to call up Jocelyn Baker.
POV change Cindy Moon.
"Hi Doc, so... I've not being entirely honest in the past 2 weeks." He raised an eyebrow, yes the last two weeks helped out a lot. I mean the antidepressants are a massive boost and they only last 30 minutes but hey they're 30 minutes of not being worried about being judged. Now that Clint is here, I can maybe strong-arm him to do something to help me, but in order for that to happen doctor Curtis needs to know the entire story.
"Clint, right? We talked over the phone last Thursday, sorry we're just meeting." They shook hands as I stood awkwardly behind them.
"Come on in, please close the door." I nodded as we stepped inside.
"Kid, are you sure?" I only nodded nervously.
"Cindy, what do you mean by not being honest?"
"Well... I'm kinda a superhero? As in I'm Silk..." I said with a wince on my voice.
"Oh, that makes sense. Well, I'm sure that we can find a way to talk about this, its alright to believe about being strong and powerful." Doc answered as if he knew something but not quite.
"No, I'm being honest, I'm Silk."
"It's alright, we can work through this." His voice reassures me. "It's something that other people are claiming; you're not alone feeling like this." He believes I'm crazy.
"Oh, you think I'm crazy?" I said in disbelief.
"Has she acted like this before?"
"Like Silk, yes, it's one of the reasons I mentored her."
"Oh, that makes sense." Clint is making fun of me and Doc is scribbling, sighing in annoyance I call the attention.
"AHEM, You don't believe me." I say aloud as both turn their heads to me.
"Well it's the new age of heroes, with heroes like Iron man and Captain America. It's actually common that people believe they're superheroes." I stood up.
"But I really am Silk."
"Alright, why do you believe you're Silk?" He said with intrigue
"Look umm I can handstand." I did a handstand then followed by using only my thumb and index.
"As many other gymnasts; although that might explain other behavior."
"You can knock it off kid."
"Doc I am saying the truth." I say as I take off my shoes. "Here, oh, this will convince you." Walking to the wall my head tells me that it's okay, I'm in control of my power. Without much trouble I'm walking up the wall and in a few steps I'm standing on the roof, my hoodie falls to cover my head but grabbing and making sure it sticks to my waist. Sticking myself to the ceiling and launched a webline to the couch that has Clint on and pulled. The couch went towards my arms and I turned towards Doctor Curtis only to see him wide eyed at me. "Where's the hidden camera?"
"There's no hidden camera... Look I can assure you I'm the original Silk." Doc is opening and closing his mouth as his notebook in on the floor.
"Doctor Curtis, this is something that can't go out of this room." He nooded with a dumb expression which made me giggle as confidence rushed over me. "You can put the couch down now." Clint said.
"Oh, right, sorry bout that!" Unsticking myself from the couch and landed on the ground followed by placing it slowly on the ground.
"Doctor, I need you to sign these documents for this is confidential." Clint said in a dead serious tone.
"Can my wife know?"
""No."" Clint and I answered as I did a handstand on the couch and took my seat now sitting cross legged and the hoodie stuck on my nose covering my nose and lips, silence reigned for about five minutes before Doc returned to himself.
"That is amazing!" He said excitedly as he stood up, even his fedora fell to the floor and he began to walk in circles in his office.
"See, I was not lying." My quip pulled his attention, he looked over at me and I smirked, its pretty funny, this unshakable person is actually freaking out.
"Okay, so I believe you... how did you become Silk?" He asked as he sat back down his notebook long forgotten.
"You see that I got my powers from a spider bite, after that everything went to hell. I was thirteen at the time, I found out about my powers... OH FUCK." I slowly turned my head to my right as Clint has wide eyes looking at me.
"Umm, I didn't mean to say that. Please Clint, don't say anything about that!" I pleaded at him. With my hands clasped hard.
"I-" Clint is wide eyed looking at me.
"They will come after me; they will want my blood and cut me up like mom." My hoodie fell of my mask as did all the feeling of empowerment over me, the need to run is overwhelming.
"I won't." Clint took my hand and smiled. "I promise, I won't tell it to anyone."
"You promise?!" My heart is actively trying to escape my chest. "Promises from you are really important, please, don't break this one. Only you and Ms. Baker do fulfill their promises! Please."
"I promise, I will take this to my grave." He said as I relaxed. as his eyes were clear and honest.
"And you doc?" I asked as my answer came in the prompt of him signing the NDA Clint brought.
"There, its legally binding, I know this doesn't mean much to you. But in the past two weeks I learned that you're an amazing person and you being a superhero makes sense. Cindy, I promise to help you as much as I can." He said which only made me happy and for the first time in this hospital without the need to be medicated I smiled.
A few hours after that session I'm sitting on the middle of the common room, I'm reading the research Tony did on arc reactors, which Clint was more than happy to bring. I actually was able to talk with Tony and Bruce over the phone Clint brought which was really cool. Bruce wants a bit of my blood to analyze it and I spoke with Tony as he has my notebook that I used to kill time when I was bored in the warehouse.
"Cindy... " A voice cut through my focus on reading.
"Ms. Baker?"
"It's Mo- auntie." She said as she took slow steps to me.
"What are you doing here?" My voice barely comes out.
"I came to see you." She grabbed my hand lightly as if I would disappear. "I was so worried." Her eyes are cloudy as it wells up with tears.
"We looked for you, I called everyone I knew but they couldn't find you." She looked like she was on the edge of breaking
"Don't cry, please, I'm not worth your tears... I'm sorry." She fell to her knees I caught her barely, she clinged onto me like her life depended on it.
"You don't have to be sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I had to pay more attention, It was my fault that you left, please forgive me" She began to cry as she held me, the pain in her voice works as a wakeup call that I was horrible to her. "Erica felt horrible after your fight."
"She...I..." I couldn't even form words.
"She had to vent, we we're being so hard on you."
"Jocelyn, was really worried about you." The voice of Mister Baker came from a few steps away. "You gave us a scare kid." He swallowed with trouble as he walked up to us, auntie stood up bringing me along. I proceeded to get hugged by Mr. Baker, who I spoke to him not much but enough to know him, instead of giving me a handshake he hugged me tightly. When the hug ended auntie took my hand as she stared at my eyes, here face is split in a smile.
"Sorry, it's just… I'm so happy I didn't lose another daughter." Her tone is filled with happiness.
"What?"
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