บท 24: 24. Fading Like A Flower.
Mariella told Damon that, "I smelled an onion in Mimi. It's starting."
Damon asked, " Do you have any idea does she has any symptoms yet?"
Mariella said, "I don't know, triple shell time. This is not gonna be easy."
"We need to stock up on everything again," Damon said. " I'd better go and make some tranquilizers for the store then," he added bitterly.
I had gotten myself in shape well 42 kilos and was living in the den watching movies. No one wanted anything for me, not taken any tests or anything. For some reason, they even brought me food. I was trying to preserve my health, trying to keep my body in as good a condition as possible, but it was not just happening.
I was surprised as Mariella came into my nest, bringing a tray of food.
She said, "Damon told me to bring you food when you didn't come to eat. "
I said, "When I didn't feel hungry, hadn't I had a new implant put in yet, I didn't pay attention as there was always a program or movie at an exciting point."
My voice was a little bitter. I was kinda pissed off still, but it would not do any good. She just nodded and went away. I took the tray and ate. I felt like the entire pack had given up on me. Of course, they brought food because it was easier for them than having to interact with me.
My symptoms started to sneak up on me. First, there was a headache. I thought at first that my neck was stuck or something, but at the point when I felt my eyeballs were tender, I knew that this time again. I was feeling kinda shivery, and I knew that soon I might have to go somewhere else. Because I was contagious when my medical problem hit me.
Damien had threatened that soon one type of the triple shells would break, but I thought it was more like a bluff. Let's see what happens now if this is one of the easier ones, anyway. I'd had a few previous medical problems, what we call them now, and had survived them, so I thought it would be the same again this time.
The only problem with them was that I was isolated so that Mariella or the rest of the pack wouldn't get sick, and besides, I didn't want to be a patient until it was necessary. I just knew it was my fate. I can handle pretty much everything that life throws at me. No need to be scared, only can be fucked up but nothing to worry about per se, only not so good time and for a long too.
After the headache had lasted a couple of days, the fever started for real. I had had the shivery feeling for days, feeling malaise too. I still didn't bother to say anything to anyone and stayed in my nest, watching the programs and waiting to see if this would pass on its own like the previous two. They had been mild.
Mild and mild, they would take weeks and it was not gonna be nice, but I needed to see how bad my symptoms would be. We had a wing in this house so I could be in here too, in isolation. I knew Damon kept his radar pretty much close when it came to me. Radar was also closed in Mariella's mind. So I had no protector or guardian to watch over me, and I had learned about it.
Some versions would not be so mild. Vomiting, diarrhea, and weakness they had lasted 3-8 weeks, and I had had new internal organs, but otherwise, I had recovered surprisingly quickly. I just couldn't get my condition in top shape and these had stressed my body, so my enzymes took the hit and I needed to have platinum in my liver too.
In addition to the headache and fever, I then had visual disturbances and a blurring of reality, so I had conversations with the television. I saw illusions, or I had a hard time distinguishing what was real and what was fiction.
Charles walked past my room while I was having a heated argument with the Avengers about whether they should sign those accords, and because I started talking to the TV at that point, Charles went to tell Damon. He was not so sure if was it safe to approach me and he had only come into the wing to get a few things from the kitchen here.
Damon sighed and said to Mariella, "Darling, I think it's time to go and see Mimi. I think she has another medical problem. Let's see how bad it is. I will know if she is infectious and if not, well, it is then triple and if you smell onion, it will be triple."
Mariella nodded. She was ready, and she knew that this would take time and effort from all of them. Upstairs could heal no one magically but there might be some solution on offering once the infection was done, because of the balance, they had to know, have to evidence how bad those triple shells would be, for Mimi and pack before they could see if they could come up with a solution.
It was Damon, not Charles, who came to see me. He walked into the room. Took a good look at me as he approached me. I was lying on the bed, trying to keep myself not to tremble too much.
I had been waiting for Charles to return, as I had just gotten myself back together to know where I was. I was focusing on I got to keep myself in this moment.
Damon said, "Baby, are you okay?" 'He came to sit side of the bed.
I looked at Damon for a moment and said, "I don't think so."
A tremendous thirst for blood, so strong I've never had one before, hit me, and I couldn't help myself. Suddenly, I attacked Damon by the neck and started to feed wildly on the blood. I growled and grunted, biting pieces of his neck. I could feel his blood running down my throat as I fed. Blood was seeping into my nightgown, and my face too.
I felt Damon's powerful arms around me as he yanked my head out of his neck, muttered a few words, and healed his neck. Damon got me off his neck and held me tight. He took me into some kind of chokehold and wrapped some energies around me, too. Just to keep me immobile.
Damon said to Mariella through his mind, "It's starting. She just mauled me as hard as she could, but I got her now and she is not contagious, so this is triple. Bring a cocktail and a strong. They are marked in black. There are ready syringes."
Mariella came into the room and handed Damon the syringe. I could feel Damon holding me and soothing me. Next came a sharp sting as he gave the syringe to my muscle. He rubbed the spot for a moment. I tried to get free. Tried to fight back, but I was very confused and I just didn't understand my rage at all.
"Mimi, it's okay, you're just there, just let it work. It's an anesthetic, not a sedative. Shh...baby.." His powerful arms held me tightly. He was trying to calm me, but my confusion got even worse.
Damon held me until the drugs took effect. I was hungry. I wanted blood; I wanted blood so badly. I was trying to feed on Damon; the blood lust was out of control, but the drug cocktail worked.
Damon held Mimi until she went limp in his grip. Mimi was already burning up; her pulse was pounding, and she felt somehow weak already. Damon knew that now the triple shell had broken. And this was bad. She felt so thin in his arms and she had not gotten in any shape after that damn platinizing and now this.
He took Mimi to the medbay and cannulated her. Damon was already looking for all the medications ready, had the collectors in his teeth himself, and was waiting for his teeth to do something. But they did nothing. He even tasted her blood. It was all wrong, but his teeth could not help, or Mariella's either.
I woke up in a hospital bed tied up. I was lucid again, but I was cold. I was in pain, and nauseous, the light hurt my eyes, and I felt really powerless, like I had already sepsis. Even blinking seemed too much of an effort.
"Oh, Mimi, you're awake," Damon said in his doctor's voice. "Yeah, you'll get a fever reducer and a sedative in a minute, and then you'll go back to sleep. You are not feeling very well, but we know about triple shells. This is that, and you are not contagious, so we help you with whatever we can."
Then he gave me the fever medicine in an injection, and I felt the sweat start to flow. I tried to hold on, but something in me knew that this was gonna be worse than any other to this date. My strength was gone. He lifted me onto the other bed on top of the towels. I was all sweaty and wet. Then he changed my bed with dry sheets and dry towels and washed me.
The washing felt good normally, but now, somehow, my skin was supersensitive, and I felt exhausted from the complete wash. Damon looked at me very carefully as he washed and probably saw and heard my thoughts. Finally, he lifted me back to the bed, took a syringe from the table, which he pressed into my cannula, and then I blacked out again.
Mariella came to the medbay just after Mimi had fallen asleep. Damon was looking a little worried. This was going to be another big fight. Massive fight and he could not remember when Mimi had been this sick, but then again, he had not always taken care of her after sessions, so maybe Charles and Adam had seen her on this stage.
Damon said, "Mimi got tired just from the bed wash. She's sore all over, so it wasn't as enjoyable as usual, and I don't know, darling. Now I can't tell how bad it's going to get. I wonder if I should ask Adam or Charles that is Mimi has ever been this sick this fast. "
Mariella snuggled up to Damon and said, " Mimi can't die. Remember the energy grid. There's nothing to worry about. Everything will be fine. We will help her, in any way possible, and even if it kills her, we will her get healed, eventually."
I knew this would not be an easy medical problem as I sat on the beach again with the chaos cat. This had been a triple shell and Damon knew about them, fine there would be probably consequences for my need for secrecy too.
I sit on a warm beach, looking at all the fish swimming in the water. They were familiar to me once they had swum in my aquarium.
I said to myself, or I don't know who I said it to, "Why does everything have to be so fucking complicated? Why can't I have Adam and Charles, just be with them and enjoy? Why do I have to be a third wheel in a relationship where I don't belong? I'm trying to be clinical and just do my job; those two don't appreciate it. I don't want Damon tearing my heart out all the time. Why can't anyone see that I'm just trying to protect myself? "
Chaos Cat was quiet and said, " Because Damon's feelings for you haven't gone anywhere, he's just hiding them. There comes a time when he has to face them. He has to face his feelings, his love for you. It won't be easy. You think it's strange when I try to explain this to you. You just need to learn that your life is a live show of the beautiful and the bold."
Then I was having nightmares again, seeing the fleas being killed, how I had to put them down, the shed sessions, the medical facilities, everything, and I couldn't take it. I was just as exhausted as I could be again.
Damon looked at Mimi and sighed deeply. They had been fighting for Mimi for ten days now. He was tired and hungry. He hadn't fucked Mariella in almost a week. He'd held Mimi in his arms while she slept, but that hadn't helped yet, either. The bacteria were too strong and had broken off several tender shells too, making this so much worse. She was not infectious, but every time those damn shells broke, she got worse.
He had cared for her, tried to bring her fever down, and tried to get her some nutrients, but she seemed to burn up all the energy and nourishment he could give her, and she was still getting weaker. He had to keep his radar closed or else he could not be able to work at all.
None of the antibiotics he had tried so far were working. The infection was just too strong. No one's teeth did anything to help. Those damn tender shells had made this so much worse, and Damon knew it had been Damien's idea all along.
Opportunistic bacteria had completely taken over his first wife's body, and Damon felt like he was fighting but couldn't win. Mimi's straps dropped steadily no matter what he did. Mimi had a fever of almost 50 degrees Celsius. She was pale, distressed, in pain, full of bruises as her blood did not clot properly at all.
The sleeping cocktail didn't keep her nearly always asleep, and Mimi was restless, even pained or panicked, and Damon could feel it. He held his trembling and restless wife in his arms and tried to get her to fall asleep for a moment at a time. He tried to offer her safety but some things that had gotten free from those shells made her delusional passionfruit did not help her at all.
Mimi had nightmares and burned off all her medication. Damon was becoming desperate. He had even let Charles try to hold Mimi, but she had become even more restless. Charles had gotten more worried, too. Everyone in the pack had tried to help, but nobody could do anything.
Damon sat in the medbay. He looked at Mimi, who was panting in her distressed dream again. He was Mimi's protector. They had a connection, and through that connection, Damon knew everything and now knew how awful it felt to be so fucking helpless, so fucking powerless. Mimi lost again a few straps. She got weaker and was in pain. And he, a powerful wizard and healer, could not do anything.
Mariella finally became wrapped up in Damon. She could feel how overwhelmed Damon was. Damon's expression was serious and pensive; there were dark circles around his eyes, and he had lost weight, too.
Damon couldn't think of anything he could do to help Mimi. He would just have to watch Mimi's straps fall off and then try to help. She could not take those powerful magic potions that could help to reduce the amount of bacteria, or few curses even. They could curse certain types of bacteria, but the shock of that would be too much for her to handle. This was hard to see her dying, yet she would not die, only she would lose her straps. Because then they could effectively treat the body without fear of hurting Mimi. Mariella knew what she had to do. She didn't want to say or do it, but she had no choice.
Mariella wrapped herself around Damon tighter and said. "You know, Damon, what you have to do," Mariella whispered. "Do it. It's a mercy. It's the right thing to do. You know what you must do, even if it's inevitable. It will happen. Now, don't let Mimi suffer anymore. We have done all that we can do, and it is time to cut those straps and get on treating her body. You are stressed. You feel her pain. Even if your radar is shut, we all feel her. She is suffering a lot. "
"I don't want to kill Mimi," Damon said.
He sighed. He had done it once before, but only to save Mariella, and it had been painless. Mimi was now almost awake again. She would feel him cutting those straps.
Mariella said, "It's a mercy for Mimi. Can't you see that the body won't last? Mimi better come to Charles's mind for a while now so we can get that body sorted out. It's not good for Mimi to be there. I know, Damon, you feel it. Just cut the straps and give Mimi some relief: no pain, no ache, no pain, no fever, no anxiety. Go on, cut them off. I know Mimi won't feel anything, but the bad feeling will stop. She is not so aware of anything but pain, agony, and distress. You can do it painlessly and fast."
Damon knew this was going to be tricky. He had never intentionally cut anyone's straps. Except once, Mimi and he had done it to save Mariella. But he had to. She was right, and this was just lingering on the inevitable. He could not save Mimi, he would have killed her to let her live again.
Mariella wrapped herself around Damon., She said to his ear, gently, "Do it, dear Damon, now. Let her go..."
Damon concentrated, and with a minor force, Mimi's remaining delicate straps were broken, the ones he'd tried so hard to guard and make last. Charles had Mimi on his mind, Charles had Mimi on his mind several times over the years, and Mimi was curious. So he had made a room for her in his mind where she could knit and rest and even read. Damon could not take Mimi into his mind. He was too stressed by this whole few weeks.
While Mimi was away from her body, Mariella and Damon dipped the body in various magic potions and disinfectants so that they could reduce the amount of bacteria. They cursed several strains of bacteria, then flushed them out with a spell. The amount of gunk was amazing and disgusting too. They drained Mimi completely and filled her with bumps and feeding liquid.
Damon's goal was to get Mimi's body to some weight so that Mimi would not feel the need for the feeding fluid. Damon carefully burned the glands out of Mimi's palate. He had told Mariella about them, and Mariella's savior radar didn't want Mimi to use one because it would wear the men out. They emptied and refilled. They waited.
I found myself once again in Charles's mind. I did not take any stress from this. I had a lot of fun in Charles's mind. I tried to escape from the room, and every couple of times, I found a way out and got to explore my husband's mind a little. Although I was right back in my room with the exit, blocked up that I had found.
Damon and Mariella fucked every day. They couldn't do anything to Mimi all the time. They had to sit and wait. Finally, after two weeks, Mimi was able to get back into her body. Mimi had already had her organs transplanted, and Damon left Adam and Charles with written feeding instructions to help Mimi recover as quickly as possible. He was now to be left alone with just Mariella.
The boys gave me my feeding instructions and released me as soon as I woke up. I weighed less than 35 kilos, but I was healthy more or less so. Once again, I had gotten myself in shape and had been on my own for a couple of days when the phone rang.
I answered. " Hey baby, have you recovered yet? There was a first for you. One type of the triple shell broke—just one type. Three things were released from there and I guess you were pretty okay. I estimate that there are about 5-8 million shells in each type, so the amount that comes out is more than enough to weaken you. Isn't it fun for the rest of your life? These weaken you enough that now and then, I can catch you for a little session. I can always put more shells into you. Maybe I can make even five-shelled ones. Well, I've got to get unloaded, too. I always felt so good in a private session, that you wouldn't believe it. "
I said to him." Well, I am here, and it broke off quite a lot of those tender shells, so their amount is reduced. I am just curious. How in god's name do you know what happened to me?"
Damien said, " I am not telling all of my secrets yet. In due time, I like to see your expression when you release how stupid you have been. I would say that the next batch will break in less than six months, so I guess you are not gonna get any good shape."
I got fed up with his voice and taunting. The phone went dead when I hung up. I didn't want to listen to it anymore.
The experience had been traumatic for the entire pack, and I didn't blame them for having a sex party. I was putting myself into some sort of shape and not saying a word to anyone in the pack. No need to traumatize them even further. I had already planned that next time. I want my straps off straight away so they can do whatever is necessary to get those shells out of me.
Once I got myself back into a good weight, meaning it started at number 4, not number 3. I started planning my road trip again. Fairs, maybe. I made a travel plan and went to Damon to get approved. He had no problem with it now as long as I was okay and he could focus directly on Mariella.
I informed the rest of the group and went for a drive. I didn't tell him I was going through my safe deposit boxes at the same time. My car had good storage compartments that were protected, so that no magic or energy could get into them. Fairs weren't now my focus but my safe deposit boxes. I would also visit several bases to leave some stuff in there, too.
My car had a huge compartment. That's where I put medical samples, money, stocks, jewels, weapons—everything I could find in my lockers. I went to a few houses in the wings to hide some of my supplies and always got new ones. These were my possessions, not the packs. I would do with these as I saw fit.
I didn't want a relationship with Damon, the alpha couple thing. Well, that was fine because I could isolate it in my head in a very special place, and I knew the alpha power lived there.
I would be with Adam and Charles whenever I could. They were my support and my security. My everything. Because Damon was with Mariella and they had such a deep connection, Damon was relaxed and happy. Mariella never fucked around or made any statements. Never prioritized work over Damon.
My superpower was back in full swing, and in my time of reflection, I found so many things, so many reasons how my behavior drove us apart, not the shed sessions because it kind of started before them. The one that killed our relationship was fleas. I knew that for sure.
Before that, before the fleas. Damon had been my whole life. Even if he wasn't always there, I was ready when he did show up. I was his. But the fleas intervened. Then, when Damon did show up, I might be at gigs or so busy organizing something that I hadn't even realized he'd been there for a couple of days and then hadn't found a reason to stay. Our relationship had been slowly withering away long before the shed sessions.
I was such a different creature by now, so much more experienced, and I realized Damon hadn't been a part of my life for a long time in the way he could have been. He knew little about my fleas; he didn't know about my gigs; he didn't know about my stash.
He knew nothing. I had, somewhere in the beginning, imagined for a while how the fleas would have been a project between me and Damon, but that had been just a daydream, a momentary thought.
Because of Damien, I couldn't trust Damon, not in the way I should have been able to. Damon knew that himself. And that was the one thing that stood between us.
So, I didn't have time to go and build a relationship with Damon because I'd have to start all over again, and I wasn't sure if any spark was left. Damon was as gorgeous as ever, if not more so, because he had lost that insecurity and tiredness, and he was looking at the world with curiosity and freedom. I wasn't curious. I wasn't free. I was now the tired, jaded, seen-it-all party, and I wasn't interested in finding out or even trying things out.
I had no wish to be the third wheel in a relationship where I would get maybe mercy fucking from time to time and it would too be short as Mariella wanted Damon to herself. Despite what Chaos Cat had remarked, Damon's feelings for me weren't anywhere near to those that he felt for Mariella. I went on with my little driving around, thinking things around in my mind, over and over again.
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