บท 3: First breakup
Jennie stirred from her slumber, a faint ache in her neck reminding her that she had fallen asleep while reading Roseanne's diary. The soft morning light filtered through the curtains, casting a gentle glow over the room. As she shifted slightly, Jennie noticed her wife, Roseanne, still peacefully asleep beside her, their shared moments of the night before etched on her face.
Gently placing the diary under the bed, Jennie reached up to massage her neck, the pages of the diary revealing the beautiful love story that had unfolded between Roseanne and Jisoo during their teenage years. While Jennie was confident in their current relationship, a flicker of unease tugged at her heart as she thought about the bond that had once existed between Roseanne and Jisoo.
Jennie's mind was a whirlwind of emotions as she navigated the newfound knowledge. Roseanne had shared her past with Jisoo, a friendship and connection that seemed to have played a significant role in shaping the person Roseanne had become. While Jennie trusted Roseanne wholeheartedly, the feelings of insecurity still lingered, fueled by the fear of the unknown and the vulnerability of human emotions.
Jennie watched Roseanne sleep, her features serene and peaceful. She knew that she was the one Roseanne had chosen to spend her life with, the one who shared her days and nights, her laughter and tears. Yet, the past, no matter how distant, had a way of sparking curiosity and stirring the insecurities that lay dormant within the depths of one's heart.
As the minutes ticked by, Jennie's unease gradually gave way to a resolute understanding. She realized that the diary was a testament to Roseanne's willingness to share her life, her experiences, and her emotions with her. Just as she had done when she confessed her feelings for Jisoo all those years ago, Roseanne had once again opened her heart to Jennie, giving her the opportunity to understand the journey that had led them to this point.
With a deep breath, Jennie leaned over and placed a soft kiss on Roseanne's forehead, her fingers brushing a few strands of hair away from her face. Roseanne stirred slightly, a contented smile gracing her lips as she began to wake.
"Good morning, my love," Jennie whispered, her voice filled with affection.
Roseanne's hands immediately snaked to Jennie's waist and pulled her closer that their faces are an inch apart and with a warm smile, her gaze softening as she looked at her wife. "Good morning, sleepyhead."
Jennie managed a small chuckle, masking the turmoil of emotions within her. "Morning, sunshine."
Roseanne's brow furrowed slightly, her smile wavering. "Is everything okay?"
Jennie forced a casual tone, shrugging lightly. "Of course, everything's fine. Just teasing you, that's all."
Roseanne's expression cleared as she chuckled softly, evidently relieved. "Oh, you and your teasing. You had me worried for a moment there."
Jennie nodded, her heart a mix of guilt and uncertainty. She didn't want Roseanne to know that she had delved into her personal diary, reading about her past experiences and the girl who had left an impression on her. There was a part of her that felt guilty for invading Roseanne's privacy, but another part yearned for the connection that seemed to have been shared between Roseanne and Jisoo.
During breakfast, the aroma of freshly brewed coffee and the sound of sizzling bacon filled the air, creating a cozy atmosphere in the kitchen. Roseanne was spreading butter on a piece of toast, her mind wandering as she thought about her day ahead.
Out of the blue, Jennie's voice broke through her reverie. "You know, I was thinking of taking a few days off from work."
Roseanne looked up, surprise evident in her eyes. "Really? Is everything okay?"
Jennie smiled sweetly, a hint of mischief in her gaze. "Yeah, I just feeling a little nauseous, maybe it's dehydration, I think about staying in all day"
Roseanne's confusion was evident, but she frwoned, knowing that there is more to it "Well, then I'll be with you"
Jennie quickly shook her head, her expression a mix of innocence and determination. "Oh, no, you can head to work, can't go missing duty calls now,"
Roseanne's concern melted into a warm smile. "Well, if you're taking time off, then I want to be with you too. I'll take a day off as well."
Jennie's heart swelled with affection at Roseanne's immediate willingness to be by her side. She couldn't help but be charmed by Roseanne's caring nature. "You really don't have to, Roseanne. It's not that serious."
Roseanne leaned across the table, a playful glint in her eyes. "You're my wife, Jennie. If you're not feeling well or if you just want some extra time together, I want to be there for you. We can have a relaxing day at home, watch some movies, and just enjoy each other's company."
Jennie's pout deepened, her lips curling into an adorable expression that made Roseanne's heart skip a beat. "You're too sweet, you know that?"
Roseanne chuckled, her eyes filled with fondness. "Well, I learned from the best."
Jennie's pout slowly turned into a mischievous grin, and she reached across the table to hold Roseanne's hand. "Okay, okay. But seriously it's not that deep. You can head to work as usual. I promise I'll be fine."
Roseanne raised an eyebrow, feigning mock surprise. "Wow, really? You're letting me off the hook that easily?"
Jennie burst into laughter, her melodic giggle filling the kitchen. "Yes, Roseanne, it's not a life-or-death situation. You can go to work. I'll just enjoy a lazy day at home."
Roseanne joined in the laughter, feeling a sense of warmth and contentment settle over them. "Alright, you win. But if you change your mind or if you need anything, don't hesitate to call me, okay?"
Jennie nodded, her eyes filled with affection. "Deal. And thank you for being so understanding."
Jennie stood on the doorstep, the taste of Roseanne's lingering kiss still on her lips. She watched as her wife's car disappeared down the street, a mixture of emotions swirling within her. The genuine love and affection she felt for Roseanne were undeniable, yet the curiosity that had led her to read the diary still tugged at her thoughts.
With a sigh, Jennie turned and headed back into the house, her steps leading her to the bedroom. Her heart raced as she reached under the bed and retrieved the diary, her fingers tracing over its worn cover. She knew that reading it was a breach of privacy, and she wrestled with guilt and uncertainty, but the desire to understand more about the past that Roseanne had shared with someone else was too strong to ignore.
Jennie settled on the bed, the diary in her lap. She took a deep breath, her mind a whirlwind of conflicting thoughts. She knew that her actions were driven by jealousy and insecurity, but she also wanted to unravel the mysteries of Roseanne's life before they had met.
Opening the diary to the marked page, Jennie began to read the continuation of the story between Roseanne and Jisoo. The pages were filled with moments of connection, shared laughter, and intimate details that painted a vivid picture of their relationship. Jennie couldn't help but be captivated by the emotions that had once bound Roseanne to this girl named Jisoo.
As she read on, Jennie's heart ached with a mix of emotions-jealousy, longing, and a deep sense of vulnerability. She felt like an intruder in the sacred realm of Roseanne's past, and yet, the more she read, the more she understood the depth of the connection between them.
And then, her eyes widened as she reached a page that seemed different from the others. The words were written with a vulnerability that struck Jennie to her core. The page seemed to hold the weight of old tears, the ink blurring slightly in places where the emotions had been too overwhelming to contain.
Jennie's heart ached as she read the words, the raw emotion seeping from the pages and into her own soul. She felt a sense of intrusion, as if she were peering into a private moment from Roseanne's past, one that was laden with pain and heartache.
As the words etched in the diary revealed a heart-wrenching story, Jennie's own eyes welled with tears. The connection between her and Roseanne deepened as she realized that behind the smiles and the sunshine, there were moments of darkness that had shaped Roseanne into the person she was today.
───※ ·❆· ※───
January 2014
The days turned into weeks, and Roseanne's relationship with Jisoo continued to flourish. Their bond deepened with every shared experience, every heartfelt conversation, and every tender touch. They were two souls intertwined, navigating the beautiful journey of love together.
But just as they were basking in the joy of their newfound connection, a storm was brewing on the horizon-a storm neither of them had anticipated.
One evening, as Roseanne and Jisoo were enjoying a quiet dinner at their favorite local cafe, their phones simultaneously buzzed with a barrage of messages and missed calls. Confused, they exchanged glances before picking up their phones, their expressions shifting from curiosity to shock as they read the message in the school group chat that was spreading like wildfire: "Roseanne and Jisoo-New Power Couple of campus!"
It was accompanied by candid photos of them, captured during moments of laughter and intimacy. It was clear that their relationship had been exposed to the world without their consent. Panic and unease settled in as they quickly realized that the intrusion into their private lives was not the only challenge they would face.
Jisoo's phone rang, her parents' names flashing on the screen. Her heart raced as she answered the call, her voice shaking. Roseanne watched her, concern etching lines on her forehead as she tried to piece together the situation.
Jisoo's side of the conversation was a mix of pleading and frustration. "Mom, please listen... No, it's not like that... I love her... Yes, she's amazing... Mom, please..."
When Jisoo finally hung up, her eyes were filled with tears and a mixture of fear and anger. "They know," she whispered, her voice trembling.
Roseanne reached across the table, her hand covering Jisoo's. "Jisoo, what happened?"
Tears streamed down Jisoo's cheeks as she met Roseanne's gaze, her vulnerability laid bare. "They found out about us... about you and me."
A heavy silence hung between them, the weight of the revelation sinking in. Roseanne's heart ached as she saw the turmoil in Jisoo's eyes, knowing that this was a battle they would have to face together.
Jisoo's eyes were filled with a mixture of pain, anger, and resignation as she stood up from the table, her movements tense and deliberate. She knew what was expected of her-to return home and face the wrath of her parents, to confront their disapproval and navigate the minefield of their expectations.
But as she gathered her belongings, a strong yet gentle grip on her wrist halted her in her tracks. Roseanne's touch was a lifeline, a silent plea for her to stay, to fight, to not let go of the love they had fought so hard to build.
"Jisoo," Roseanne's voice quivered with a blend of sadness and determination, "you don't have to do this alone. We can face this together."
Tears welled up in Jisoo's eyes, her resolve crumbling in the face of Roseanne's unwavering support. It was the first time Roseanne had seen her strong and confident girlfriend so vulnerable, so raw. Jisoo's walls had finally cracked under the weight of her emotions, and the floodgates had opened.
The tears began to stream down Jisoo's cheeks, her shoulders shaking as she fought to hold back sobs that threatened to escape. Roseanne's heart shattered as she witnessed the pain that Jisoo had been keeping hidden, the pain that now poured forth like a river breaking free from its confines.
"Jisoo," Roseanne's voice was a gentle whisper, filled with aching empathy, "it's okay to cry. I'm here for you."
Jisoo's resistance crumbled completely as she sank to her knees, her sobs wracking her body. Roseanne moved swiftly, pulling Jisoo into a tight embrace, her arms wrapping around her with a protective warmth. She held Jisoo as the tears fell, her own eyes glistening with unshed emotion.
"I'm so scared, Roseanne," Jisoo's voice trembled between sobs, the weight of her fear and uncertainty pouring out like a torrent. "I don't want to lose them, but I don't want to lose you either."
Roseanne's heart ached as she stroked Jisoo's hair, her words a soothing balm for the wounds that had been opened. "You don't have to choose, Jisoo. We'll find a way through this, together. Your parents may not understand now, but maybe with time, they will come to see the love we share."
Jisoo clung to Roseanne as if she were her lifeline, her cries slowly subsiding but the vulnerability and pain remaining etched on her face. "What if they never come around? What if they refuse to accept us?"
Roseanne held Jisoo's face in her hands, her gaze unwavering and filled with determination. "Then we'll create our own path, Jisoo. We'll build a life together, filled with love and acceptance. We'll surround ourselves with people who support us, who celebrate our love."
As Roseanne spoke, a glimmer of hope began to spark in Jisoo's eyes, the darkness of her despair giving way to a ray of light. She took a shuddering breath, her grip on Roseanne tightening as she whispered, "I want to be with you, Roseanne."
Roseanne's heart swelled with love and pride as she pressed a tender kiss to Jisoo's forehead. "Then that's what we'll do. No matter what challenges come our way, we'll face them hand in hand."
A week had passed since that fateful day at the cafe, and the silence that hung between Roseanne and Jisoo was deafening. Each passing day felt like an eternity, filled with unanswered questions and the haunting specter of uncertainty. Roseanne's worry gnawed at her heart, her thoughts consumed by the fear of what might have transpired in Jisoo's household.
Unable to bear the weight of the silence any longer, Roseanne found herself outside Jisoo's window one moonlit night. Her heart raced as she glanced around, her mind a whirlwind of emotions. With a deep breath, she carefully lifted the window and slipped inside, her movements slow and deliberate.
The room was shrouded in darkness, save for the soft glow of the moon filtering through the curtains. Roseanne's heart pounded in her chest as she looked around, her eyes finding Jisoo's figure huddled on the bed, her breathing steady yet filled with a sense of restlessness.
"Jisoo," Roseanne's voice was barely above a whisper as she approached the bed.
Jisoo's eyes flew open, her body tense as she registered the unexpected presence in her room. Her breath caught in her throat as she saw Roseanne, her expression a mix of surprise, confusion, and a trace of relief.
"Roseanne?" Jisoo's voice trembled as she sat up, her eyes never leaving Roseanne's face. "What are you doing here?"
Roseanne's gaze softened as she knelt beside the bed, her fingers gently reaching out to brush a strand of hair away from Jisoo's face. "I was worried about you, Jisoo. I didn't know what was happening, and I couldn't bear the thought of not knowing if you were okay."
Tears welled up in Jisoo's eyes as she met Roseanne's gaze, the raw vulnerability in her expression breaking through the walls she had built around herself. "I didn't want you to get hurt, Roseanne. I thought it was best for both of us if I just... stayed away."
Roseanne's heart ached as she cupped Jisoo's cheek, her touch gentle and reassuring. "Jisoo, I understand that you were trying to protect me, but we're in this together. I want to be there for you, no matter what."
Jisoo's voice quivered as she whispered, "My parents... they're not ready to accept us, Roseanne. They want me to choose between them and you."
Tears spilled from Jisoo's eyes, her pain palpable and heartbreaking. Roseanne's heart shattered as she pulled Jisoo into her arms, holding her tightly as they both succumbed to the weight of their emotions. The room was filled with the sound of their quiet sobs, a symphony of love and despair.
"Jisoo, I love you," Roseanne's voice was a tender whisper against Jisoo's ear. "And I'll stand by your side, no matter what challenges come our way. We'll face them together."
Jisoo clung to Roseanne as if her life depended on it, her grip unyielding. In that moment, the darkness that had clouded their path seemed to lift ever so slightly, replaced by a glimmer of hope-a hope born from the unwavering love they shared.
The day that followed was filled with a mix of anticipation and unease for Roseanne. Jisoo's unexpected visit the previous night had rekindled a sense of hope, but there was also an underlying tension that lingered in the air. Roseanne found herself constantly checking her phone, waiting for a message or a call from Jisoo.
Finally, as the sun began to set and cast a warm, golden hue over the city, Roseanne's phone buzzed with a notification. Her heart skipped a beat as she read the message: "Meet me at our café. There's something important I need to talk to you about. Love, Jisoo."
Despite the vague tone of the message, Roseanne's excitement overpowered any sense of caution. She quickly got ready, her mind racing with possibilities as she made her way to the café that held so many cherished memories.
When Roseanne arrived at the café, she spotted Jisoo sitting by the window, her gaze fixed on something outside as if lost in thought. A mixture of relief and concern washed over Roseanne as she approached the table.
"Jisoo," Roseanne's voice was soft, filled with both curiosity and care. "You wanted to talk?"
Jisoo looked up, her eyes meeting Roseanne's, and for a moment, the weight of the world seemed to rest upon her shoulders. She managed a small smile, though it didn't quite reach her eyes.
"Roseanne," Jisoo's voice quivered slightly, "there's something I need to tell you, and I want you to listen to the end before you react, okay?"
Roseanne's brows furrowed in concern, her heart pounding as she took a seat across from Jisoo. "Of course, Jisoo. You can tell me anything."
Jisoo took a deep breath, her fingers nervously tracing the rim of her coffee cup. "After everything that's happened... after the chaos with my parents and all the emotions we've been through... I've been doing a lot of thinking, Roseanne."
Roseanne nodded, her gaze unwavering as she gave Jisoo her full attention.
"And... I've realized that I can't keep living a life that doesn't feel true to myself," Jisoo's voice trembled, and Roseanne could sense the internal struggle she was experiencing.
A sense of unease settled over Roseanne as she waited for Jisoo to continue. There was a sinking feeling in her chest, a premonition that whatever Jisoo was about to say might not be what she wanted to hear.
Jisoo took another deep breath, her eyes never leaving Roseanne's. "Roseanne, I... I need to be honest with you. I... I can't continue our relationship."
The words hit Roseanne like a punch to the gut, her heart stopping for a moment before racing into overdrive. Disbelief and a sense of devastation washed over her, leaving her momentarily speechless.
"I... I know this is sudden, and I'm so sorry," Jisoo's voice cracked, tears welling up in her eyes as she reached out to grasp Roseanne's hand across the table. "Please understand that I've been torn apart by this decision. It's not because I don't love you, Roseanne. It's because... I need to find myself, to understand who I am outside of everyone else's expectations."
Roseanne's eyes welled up with tears as she looked into Jisoo's anguished gaze. Roseanne felt a storm of emotions brewing within her as she listened to Jisoo's explanation. While her outward appearance remained composed, her heart was a tempest of disbelief, anger, and frustration. Deep down, a nagging voice told her that there was more to this than Jisoo was letting on. The idea that Jisoo was leaving for reasons unrelated to their love and connection felt like a betrayal.
As Jisoo's tearful confession continued, Roseanne's grip on her emotions began to slip. She had spent enough time with Jisoo to know her inside out, to understand the nuances of her feelings. And in that moment, Roseanne's intuition screamed that something was amiss, that there were unspoken forces at play.
"Jisoo," Roseanne's voice quivered with a mixture of sadness and frustration, "I can't believe that this is all about self-discovery. We've been through so much together, and you can't just tell me that you're suddenly leaving for some vague notion of finding yourself."
Jisoo's tear-filled eyes met Roseanne's gaze, and for a moment, the truth seemed to hang in the air between them. Roseanne's words had struck a nerve, and Jisoo's facade wavered.
"I know you, Jisoo," Roseanne's voice grew more intense, her emotions breaking through her controlled exterior. "I've seen you at your best and your worst. I've held you when you cried, and I've shared your laughter. You can't stand there and tell me that you're leaving because you need to find yourself."
Tears streamed down Jisoo's face as she lowered her gaze, her hands trembling. Roseanne's words had exposed the cracks in her carefully constructed facade, and the weight of her own lies was becoming too much to bear.
"Roseanne, please understand," Jisoo's voice was a desperate plea, her vulnerability laid bare. "There are things... things I can't tell you right now. It's not that I don't want to be with you, but I need to protect you."
Roseanne's anger mingled with a growing sense of hurt. She felt like the foundation of their relationship was crumbling beneath her, and she was left grasping at straws to understand what was happening.
"Protect me?" Roseanne's voice was laced with bitterness. "Protect me from what, Jisoo? From the truth?"
Jisoo's gaze wavered under the intensity of Roseanne's words, and for a moment, her composure faltered. But just as quickly, a defensive wall seemed to rise around her, her expression hardening.
"Roseanne, it's not that simple," Jisoo's voice was tinged with frustration, her eyes avoiding direct contact. "You don't understand what it's like for me. I'm still young, and I can't just disregard my parents' wishes. I'm still under their care, and there are responsibilities I can't ignore."
Roseanne's anger flared, her own frustration bubbling to the surface. "Responsibilities? Jisoo, we've talked about this. We've talked about how our love is worth fighting for. Are you telling me that your parents' approval matters more to you than what we share?"
Jisoo's gaze met Roseanne's, her eyes filled with a mix of conflict and desperation. "It's not that black and white, Roseanne. I have to consider my future, my family's expectations. I can't just leave everything behind."
Roseanne's voice was laced with bitterness as she shot back, "So, what? We're just supposed to walk away from each other and pretend that none of this ever happened? That our love isn't worth a fight?"
Jisoo's shoulders slumped, her eyes welling up with tears as she whispered, "It's not about not loving you, Roseanne. It's about the reality of my situation."
The weight of the moment hung heavy in the air, a palpable tension that seemed to envelop them both. Roseanne's anger was mixed with hurt, her heart aching at the idea that Jisoo was choosing to let their love go for reasons that felt shallow and insincere.
"Jisoo," Roseanne's voice softened, the frustration giving way to a deep sadness, "I thought we were in this together. I thought we were a team, willing to face whatever challenges came our way. But now... now it feels like you're giving up on us without even trying."
Jisoo looked at Roseanne with a challenging glint in her eyes, her voice tinged with a mix of defiance and desperation. "Okay, Roseanne, are you willing to run away from here with me? To start a new life, away from all this judgment and expectation?"
The question hung in the air like a heavy cloud, the weight of its implications sinking in. Roseanne's gaze met Jisoo's, and for a moment, the room seemed to hold its breath. It was a daring proposition, one that carried the promise of freedom from the suffocating constraints of their current reality.
The silence between them stretched, each passing moment intensifying the gravity of the situation. Jisoo's gaze was fixed on Roseanne, her eyes a mix of anticipation and resignation, waiting for a response that seemed to hold their entire future.
"See," Jisoo's voice was tinged with a hint of bitterness, "we both know the truth. We can't."
Roseanne's jaw tightened, a swirl of conflicting emotions churning within her. She knew Jisoo was right-running away wasn't a viable solution, and the romanticized idea of starting anew had to contend with the practical realities of life.
But a spark of defiance ignited within Roseanne, a flicker of hope that dared to challenge the limitations they faced. "Jisoo, I'm not saying it's easy, but... maybe we can find a way to make it work. We can build our own path, create a life together where our love isn't overshadowed by judgment and expectations."
Jisoo's scoff was laced with a bitter irony. "And how do you propose we do that, Roseanne? We're not living in a fairy tale. We're living in the real world, where responsibilities and obligations aren't so easily cast aside."
Roseanne's gaze bore into Jisoo's, her voice unwavering. "I don't have all the answers, Jisoo. But I refuse to believe that our love is something we should sacrifice. We can fight for it, together."
Jisoo's expression wavered, a mix of frustration and longing. "And what about my family? What about my parents? Am I supposed to just abandon them?"
"No," Roseanne replied firmly, her voice softening with empathy. "I'm not asking you to abandon anyone. But we can find a way to navigate this, to forge a path that respects both our love and your family."
Jisoo's eyes glistened with unshed tears, her inner turmoil laid bare. "Roseanne, you don't understand the pressure, the expectations. It's not as simple as it sounds."
Roseanne's shoulders slumped, her voice heavy with a mix of sadness and resignation. "Is this it, Jisoo? Is this where it all ends?"
Jisoo's gaze met Roseanne's, her eyes filled with a profound sense of defeat. She nodded, her voice barely above a whisper. "I don't want it to be, Roseanne. But right now, it feels like we're at a crossroads we can't navigate."
The weight of those words settled over them like a heavy fog, a stark reminder of the reality they were facing. The love that had once been a guiding light now felt like an anchor, tethering them to the choices they had to make.
Roseanne's heart ached as she reached across the table, her fingers tracing a path along Jisoo's hand. "Jisoo, even if our paths diverge for now, please know that you'll always have a piece of my heart. Our story isn't over, even if it's taking a different turn."
Tears welled up in Jisoo's eyes as she squeezed Roseanne's hand, her voice trembling with emotion. "I'll carry you with me, Roseanne. No matter where life takes me, a part of me will always belong to you."
As the weight of their conversation lingered in the air, Jisoo stood up from her seat, her movements slow and deliberate. She walked over to Roseanne's side, her gaze locked with Roseanne's, a silent understanding passing between them.
With a tenderness that spoke volumes, Jisoo leaned in and pressed a lingering kiss to Roseanne's cheek. It was a kiss filled with a myriad of emotions-love, longing, and a touch of sorrow. The moment stretched, the connection between them unbreakable even in the face of their impending separation.
"I'll always care about you, Roseanne," Jisoo whispered, her voice soft and filled with sincerity. "Please take care of yourself."
Tears welled up in Roseanne's eyes as she nodded, Their hands brushed against each other for a moment, a fleeting touch that held a universe of unspoken words. Then, with a final, lingering glance, Jisoo turned and walked away, leaving Roseanne with a heart heavy with a mixture of sorrow and gratitude.
The café seemed to hold its breath as Jisoo's figure disappeared into the distance, a reminder of the fleeting nature of moments, of love, and of life itself. Roseanne remained seated, her cheek still tingling from the touch of Jisoo's lips, her heart echoing with the whispered promise of a love that would endure even in the face of challenges.
And as the door closed behind Jisoo, the café returned to its quiet solitude, carrying with it the echoes of a love story that had been both beautiful and heart-wrenching-a story of two souls who had found each other in the midst of chaos, and who, against all odds, had shared a love that would forever leave an indelible mark on their lives.
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