บท 14: Desiderium
Issei Hyoudou felt as if the world was ending around him. The comfort, the peace he had taken for granted, that he had taken as a fact was being stripped away from him without him being able to do anything.
It made him feel weak, it made him feel powerless and he hated it so fucking much. He had hated how he had been unable to do anything when he was skewered by Raynare and her spear.
He hated how he had been so weak that he had been unable to save the life of Asia. If the President hadn't been there, he would have lost her forever.
He had hated how even with training like he never did, doing his best, he was unable to do anything against Riser.
He was supposed to be the Red Dragon emperor. He had inside his soul the boosted gear, a sacred gear, a blessing from the God of the Bible that allowed him to double his strength every ten seconds.
He should have been able to crush all the enemies that had been on his way. It should have made him able to protect what mattered.
"Issei," he heard Asia calling him softly at his side but he didn't turn toward her. For a moment, he wished that none of this was real, that the beheaded head of his mother In his grasp was not real. He wished that the expression that adorned her beheaded face wasn't one of complete terror.
He wished that the house, that the neighbourhood he had grown in with his parents and his friends was not turned into rubble.
He wished to be able to forget the sight of the crushed corpse of his father under rubble and debris.
He felt Asia hug him. Normally, it would have made him so happy that breathing would have become hard.
He was a known pervert. Many despised him for this when in reality, they were not better. He was the only one amongst them who was honest, who didn't hide his true desire behind false masks of civility.
He was the one who declared his dream high and proud and they shunned and shamed him for it when he could see in their eyes that they were worse.
'Well, it's not as if it mattered anymore' he thought. He looked around him. After all, it was clear that Asia and Issei were the only ones that had survived.
If he focused, he could hear the sound of the sobs and cries of people who had been yet able to find peace in death.
This world, one that he had thought every one of his dreams would be possible was a cruel one.
When the president of the student council had talked of war, a war that would even impact normal humans who had nothing to do with it like his parents, he had been scared.
He had seen personally how dangerous this world could be. He would never be able to forget the thick smell of blood, one so overpowering and overwhelming that even to this, he could almost taste it.
He would never forget the the image of cut and tortured flesh, of agony etched on a corpse that had been while alive maintained in a state of agony for too long.
He had been angry. He had directed to the president when it had not been her fault. He knew that she was trying her best and with the way he had seen her fight against Riser with so much despair, staying angry at her was an exercise in futility.
He knew that even if she hadn't saved him because this is what in truth, she had done, nothing would have changed.
Issei Hyoudou would have died leaving behind him a grief-stricken parent and the reputation of a pervert that in the end amounted to nothing, that wasn't able to do anything.
He wondered bar his family if anyone except the other members of the perverted trio would have come to his funeral. Probably not.
In the end, nothing would have changed. Issei Hyoudou would have been dead and his parents would have followed him for even a month after because of a supernatural being when they didn't deserve it.
He heard steps, crashing against the Earth creating a metallic symphony as if steel was being battered against steel.
The man, the author of this massacre, the supernatural being that had made Issei an orphan was just before his eyes.
Blood was splattered all over him but it didn't seem to bother him. He looked like what you would have expected a noble samuraï to look like.
He looked like a pretty boy that had decided to grow a beard. The beard instead of making him look handsome made him look more like a bishounen than anything else.
He had long dark hair that he had put in a man bun but even then his hair continued to fall to the middle of his back.
He was dressed in traditional samurai armour from his neck to his toes. A Yoroi Issei was able to recognize. He had a spear in his right hand.
Bring near to him, a part of Issei yearned to throw himself at the feet of the supernatural being, to worship him, the killer of his parents.
Being near to this being made his soul scream in agony, in search of salvation. Isssi crushed this feeling with his hatred, with the mounting rage he could feel increasing ceaselessly.
He felt fire in his soul, travelling to every nook and cranny. It was consuming from the inside burning and strengthening him. He ignored it, his gaze fixated on the stranger, on the killer.
"Why?" he found himself asking. He wanted to know why his parents, his friends and the humans of the city Kuoh who had done nothing died. He wanted to know why and what was the reasons for them to suffer from a gruesome death they didn't deserve.
"It's simple," the god answered. "They were corrupted. They dealt with devils like you and were content with doing it, they dealt with foreigners, invaders," the god spat.
"It is clear that all of this city needs cleansing so that what comes from its ashes is something better," the god spoke.
Issei slowly gave the Head of his mother to Asia. "Please, Asia keep it for now. Maybe the president will be able to do anything, something." He ignored the pity and sadness in his eyes as she took in her arms the head of his mother.
The president had been able to resurrect him and Asia. She has said that she considers them family. Issei was sure that she could find a way to undo all of this, to at least bring back his parents.
He wanted to believe this. He crushed any thought indicating the contrary. All of this could be fixed but for this.
The boosted gear appeared on his left arm. All of this will be fixed but before he would make sure to drown the murderer of his parents in crimson. Issei began to walk toward the god.
"Oh?" the God spoke. "You're approaching me? Shouldn't you try to run? I'm a god, the great Bishamonten and my domain falls under slaying beings like yo-"
Issi shut him up with two words.
"Dragon shot"
A ball made of demonic energy rushed toward the face of the god. The spear of the god moved deviating it into the air and bathing the world in crimson.
"Boost" his sacred gear sang with glee and anticipation.
Issei rushed toward the god and Threw a punch at his face. The god didn't try to don't choosing instead to move the body of his spear to block Issei.
The boosted gear crashed against the spear And the ground and Earth exploded around them sending flying dirt and blood everywhere in the air.
Issei felt something hit him in the chest, something that was burning from the inside. It stang worse than the light of the fallen angels.
He looked downward and realized why everything was now hurting. There was a spear in his stomach, the spear of the god.
The god that had killed his parents looked bored as if he was doing a task that he could not wait to finish before leaving.
It enraged him and his rage gave him strength. He grabbed the spear in his guts tightly so that it would not move.
He directed his left arm to the face of the god. He didn't say anything. He just wished for all the anger, all the hatred that he had to pour into the mortal world.
He wanted the god to suffer. A stream of Fire appeared from his palm. The flames were red and they consumed everything in their path. The air before him erupted in plasma. The Earth turned into Lava and all traces of moisture and blood evaporated around them.
The fire began to devour everything around them, consuming rubble and corpses as if it were a macabre feast.
Everything in his line of sight was consumed and erased by his flames. He watched how city blocks that had been untouched by the rampage of the god also caught on fire.
This is why he was surprised when he felt something close over his palm and crush his flames with only pure strength.
His fire disappeared and he realized that the monster had been untouched, that he still looked as pristine as he was.
The attack that he had just produced was he could feel so much greater than the dragon shot he had realized after training to fight Riser, the dragon shot that had been able to put a hole in a mountain and that he knew would have been able to destroy a small city.
"How?" he found himself muttering. How was this possible? Was he really weak? Was the gap between this god and him truly so vast?
"You're an ant that thought it could rise higher than its natural station," the god spoke. With a violent wrench, the spear came out of his body shredding Issei's insides.
Issei watched with Horror and fear how his own guts were laying outside his body where they shouldn't be. He felt himself becoming heavy as if the weight of the world was pressing on his shoulders as if he was Atlas.
The brown-haired boy fell painfully on his knees. He would have laughed in self-depreciation if he could have.
In the end, he had truly been unable to do anything that was worth it. He could see the shadow of the god towering over him preparing to move and probably end Issei's life and Asia's after.
Issei put all the strength that he had left and turned toward where he knew Asia was. 'There were so many things he wished he could do' he thought while looking at her. 'That he could have done.'
He had wanted to fight so that Asia would never cry again and so that the new life that he had forcefully imposed on her by asking the president to reincarnate her would be one full of happiness.
He had instead failed. She was now crying looking at him with despair and sadness like she had done with Raynare.
I'm sorry, he tried to say but his mouth wasn't able to open. His vision was darkening as if a veil was being placed.
Breathing became more exhausting and difficult for his body which was fighting against something that could clearly not be fought against.
If he hadn't been a devil, Issei doesn't think that he would have been able to even think or be alive after being stabbed by the god.
Issei closed his eyes and waited for the end of the story of Hyoudou Issei, for the end of a dreamer who wasn't able to realize anything.
This is why he was surprised when he didn't feel pain, a severe agony that would lead to the end of his existence.
Instead, he heard the sound of metal crashing against metal, of a vibrating symphony of steel and crystal.
He opened his eyes and realized that something was surrounding him, protecting him.
It had an emerald colour, the exact shade that Asia had in her eyes or when she used her red gear to heal.
The wounds that he was suffering from hadn't disappeared but the pain was lessening and strength was slowly but surely flooding back into his body. His body was slowly being mended by an invisible force.
It was a feeling he was familiar with. This was the feeling that he had always felt, experienced when Asia was using twilight healing on him and his injuries.
He turned toward where he knew the ex-nun was. She looked as if she was in pain but fighting through it. Blood was running like a stream from her nose, the green of her twilight healing was present and a thread was latched on the shield that was protecting him, that had saved his life.
"Asia?!" Issei said the name of the nun in shock and surprise.
"You told me that you wanted me to be happy but how could I be happy if you die!" she yelled.
Issei felt as if he had been punched in the chest. He felt tears blind his vision. "I'm sorry Asia," he spoke. "I didn't want this."
"That shouldn't have been possible," Issei heard the god mutter. The god was grabbing his chin in a thinking pose. Instead of looking angry or shocked, he looked delighted like a scientist having discovered a hidden truth about the universe.
The god moved too quickly his arm holding his spear for Issei's vision to follow and attacked the shield with another slash.
They met in a symphony of steel. A shockwave erupted blasting and sending barreling away from them lava, blood, and dirt everywhere around them.
Unlike the first time, the shield was not left unscathed. The god had been able to break through it but the shield had deviated from the slash of the god.
Issei knew that the god would have not in any other way missed if it wasn't for the shield. The spear was centimetres away from Issei on his left buried in the Earth like an artefact from a bygone Era.
"I was right!" the god exclaimed himself with excitement. The god grabbed his spear and pulled it out of the ground.
The god turned toward Asia and began to walk toward her slowly the head of his spear trailing through the blackened earth behind him "The only reason why I hadn't been able to kill him was because of something I hadn't inspected. Divinity!"
"The divinity of the father of your creator, the same divinity that his demiurgic archangels also inherited. You're a devil," the god said to Asia stopping his towering form over the ex-nun.
"How were you able to do this?" the god asked. "If I'm able to understand how you were able to do such a thing, we, gods of the East will maybe be able for once to take once from them, to fight against them with the ruinous powers they always used against us."
Bishamonten looked at the sky as if he could already imagine what he was talking about unfolding in the true world "The legions of hell, the hordes of the underworld, the watchers of the Grigori, we will finally be able to break them, defeat them, so I'll repeat myself. How were you able to do such a thing?" the god asked.
Asia didn't try to back down from the towering bloodstained form of the Shinto god. She stayed unmoving looking at him in the eyes without fear.
The blood that had been coming from her nose had stained her clothes, and her skin looked battered and in some places burnt Issei realized with guilt.
He had been so incensed, so angry at the god that he hadn't tried to take into count who he could have impacted or hurt.
He remembered the tales that the father of Irina had liked to read to them when Issei had come to their houses.
He hadn't truly believed them seeing them more as cool stories or myths, unlike Irina. The other boy had seen those stories as facts and Isssi had liked to tease Irina about it when in reality, Irina had been right.
Issei remembered the tale of David and Goliath. It was a tale of the impossible being done. It was a tale of faith winning against what should have been a fixed truth of reality.
Looking at Asia, Issei could not help himself but remember it. He had always found her beautiful and he would have been lying to say that he didn't love her.
It was something that even deep in his mind, he would have never acknowledged before. After all, there would be no points. Asia was as close to perfection as it could possibly be Issei had always thought.
She was something perfect, pure that his hands could have only tainted. She was someone who deserved the world, who deserved someone who could give it to her.
She deserved someone better than him, a pervert who never had been able to do anything right. A pervert who had all of his accomplishments coming from the help of others, from luck.
Even before being reincarnated, it had been the case. He wasn't like Motohama and Matsuda who entered Kuoh Academy through their hard work.
Motohama had entered Kuoh Academy being one of the students with the best marks of admittance.
Matsuda had been a local star of baseball in the region even before entering Kuoh. Issei knew that the boy would be someone in the future who would represent and make proud their country.
What was Issei? A pervert that became a murderer? He had been angry at the god because of the lives that he had taken but was Issei truly better? What said that he hadn't killed survivors by unleashing his flames on the god?
"That's simple," Asia began to answer the god. "But why should I tell you?" she spoke.
Isssi could hear steel in the voice of the nun, something he never had before. "You came here and only brought ceaseless slaughter and carnage. All those people were innocent and they died because of you. I'll answer you with another question. Why should I tell you?" she said to the god.
Issei wanted to scream at the nun, to tell her to run. Didn't she understand what this monster could do to her?
'Move,' he yelled at his body that stayed uncooperative. 'Move' he begged his body. It didn't matter that his guts were still outside his body, that pain was ravaging every one of his nerves. He needed to move or he would truly lose everything.
Issei heard a chuckle come from the god. It came subdued at first before erupting like a volcano banishing the silence.
The god laughed and laughed as if the funniest joke had been said and only he understood the punchline.
The laughs slowly began to trickle down. "It's been such a long time since I laughed this much," the god spoke.
"Why should you tell me?" the god repeated the words of Asia. "I see what you are. Nothing that I do to you will make you say anything. You're the worst kind of people. You are a martyr."
The god began to walk around Asia like a panther playing with its prey "But you see there are many ways to deal with martyrs," the god spoke.
"They don't fear dying and suffering because they in their mind do it for something greater. The thing with martyrs," the god continued "is that they are only ready to sacrifice their lives."
Issei felt his body stiffen as the gaze of the god fell on him. "They are however not ready to sacrifice the lives of their loved ones."
Issei watches how the realization of the meaning of the words of the god appeared in Asia's eyes before he heard something fall at his side.
He turned slowly toward where he had heard the sound. 'Oh, that was an arm that had fallen, his right arm' he thought before numbness was replaced with agony and pain.
Issei fell on his left side his boy now unbalanced. Sobs and wails of pain began to escape him even though he tried to muffle them.
Everything began to feel cold. Issei had escaped death many times but it seemed that it was finally the end.
He could see her from the corner of his eyes looking at him the face full of sadness. He had never seen her before but it felt as if he knew her.
She looked like a young, attractive, slim woman She had very pale skin that looked more like chalk or the white bones of a skeleton than anything else. She also had dark eyes that were so deep that Issei felt as if the universe could be contained in them, long jet-black hair and what seemed to be an Egyptian Eye of Horus painted under one of her eyes.
She wore clothes that could only be said to be casual. All of her clothes were black. She wore a black tank top and slim jeans and to finish black fashionable boots.
"Issei!" he heard Asia yell followed by running steps. He felt something envelop him, surround him. He didn't have enough strength but he knew that it was the twilight healing of Asia, that she was trying to heal him like she had always done.
'I am so sorry,' he wanted to tell her. 'He wished things could be different, that he could change all of this.'
"It would be a good thing for you to answer me honestly. If you don't, the one that will be hurt is your lover. I'll hurt him again and again. I'll make sure to not kill him but I will ensure that the pain he would be feeling would be one even he damned of hells didn't experience so talk," the god spoke.
Issei could hear choked sobs and feel something watery fall on his face. He realized with horror that it came from Asia, that the girl that he loved that he had promised to make sure she would never feel sadness again was crying because of him, because he was weak.
"Faith," he heard Asia say softly sounding broken and defeated. "It's because even with everything that happened to me, I still believe in God," the ex-nun spoke.
"A devil that believes and worships God, its natural enemy" the god mused out loud.
"That's a novelty for sure but it's not really helping me. Maybe you should try to be more precise," the god said to Asia.
"That's the only thing that I know. When you attacked Issei, I wanted to protect him, I prayed and he answered, something I never thought he would do with me now being a devil," Asia answered.
"Well, that is still not helping," the god spoke before Issei felt the Earth itself shake before he felt something pierce through his heart.
"Why?" he heard Asia ask in shock and despair at his side.
The pale lady was now kneeling before him. She looked at him with a gaze full of love and acceptance, like the way a mother looked at her child. "He's not needed," he heard the god say to Asia. "I will ask for the help of Emma and Benzenten. They never liked your kind. I'm sure that they'll agree to dissect your soul to see what makes you tick, what makes you special."
It was not fair. Was this the end? Issei dead at the hands of an uncaring god and Asia, the girl he loved tortured because she was special, different?
'Is this how your story is going to end,' he heard a deep and foreboding voice tell him in his mind as the voice was coming straight from a tempest.
"There is nothing that I can do,' Issei snarled. 'He was weak. It didn't matter that he was reincarnated with eight pawns, that he had a sacred gear. Zero multiplied by an infinite amount of time was still Zero.'
'What if I told you that I could give you the strength you desire, that you wish for a price, a sacrifice' the voice spoke.
'I don't care about what I have to give. As long as she is safe, this is what matters to me. I don't care if I die or live. I just want her to be happy' he said to the voice.
'The something You need to give is a part of yourself. Power comes at a price. The more you give, the more you'll change but in return, the more you'll lose of yourself' the voice told him. Issei could almost feel respect in the voice
It didn't matter what he would become, what would become of him. 'Mom, Dad, Rias, thank you for all the things you've done for me' Issei thought.
'My soul,' Issei told the voice. 'I'll give you my soul. Take all of it, take everything. I don't care as long as I can protect her.'
'I had been wrong about you,' the voice rumbled. 'You truly deserve to be the red dragon emperor!'
He felt pain, mind-numbing pain that made everything he had felt before feeling like a walk in the park.
He felt empty as if something irreplaceable had been taken from him. He felt strength, so much strength flood him that he felt as if he could win against the Abrahamic god himself.
Slowly he rose, and the ground under him began to turn into lava with him at the epicentre as if he was bringing hell to the mortal world.
Black bones erupted from his severe arm. Thorny Scarlet flesh and sinews began to recover it. Bright red Threads of energy appeared mimicking the appearance of veins. Scarlet Flesh and armour covered the abominable replica of a human hand.
The god was turned away from him. He had trapped Asia in what seemed to be a floating orb. Her eyes widened when she looked at him.
"How?" the god asked.
Issei didn't try to answer. Before him was his prey. Issei pushed softly on his heel appeared before the god and punched him in the face.
He felt the nose of the god crush under his fist before the god was sent flying out of Kuoh leaving on his path destruction and wreckage as if he was a missile. The god entered into contact with the Kuoh barrier and broke through it shattering it.
The world finally realized what happened and erupted around Issei a sound wave that ruptured everything around them except Asia which was still protected by the bubble of the god that was now cracked.
He walked toward it and with a touch of one of his fingers, the barrier broke.
"Boost" he heard his sacred gear utter for a second time. It had only been less than ten seconds. It had felt like an eternity.
His strength and his power doubled. Issei could see that the god was still flying. It meant that the coast was clear.
He turned toward Asia. "You have to leave," he heard himself say.
"I don't want to leave you. I don't want to lose you," she spoke hugging him.
"I don't want to lose you too, Asia," he told her. "This is why I need to do this, for us. I promised that I would protect you. I almost broke this promise. I won't be able to hold it if you stay here. Even now, I'm restraining myself, Asia," Issei told her.
"I feel bigger and stronger than I've ever been. It's as if all this time, the world didn't make sense and it finally did. It's as if I could see everything, all of the picture," he told her.
"What do you see?" she asked him.
He extracted slowly from the hug. He looked her in the eyes "I only see you Asia," he answered her.
He felt something brush against his lips. It was quick and chaste but it was unmistakably a kiss. "Come back to me," she told him softly.
"I promise," he told her.
Slowly she backed away from him and with a little nod, a teleportation circle appeared under her feet.
Issei watched how she sank into it. He hoped that the other members of the occult club would be able to protect her and make her reach somewhere safe.
He turned his attention back to the god that had his flight stopped by a mountain. Issei could see him bleeding from his nose. Blood had fallen on his right hand and the god was looking at it with shock. Good, this was just the beginning after all.
ความคิดของผู้สร้าง 
allen1996
allen1996 Bishamonten is seen as the god of treasure, wealth and warriors. He’s the protector of Buddhism, guardian of the north, defender of the nation, the scourge of evildoers, healer of illness and repeller of foreign invasions. He’s seen in Buddhism as a deva. He is also seen as a manifestation of Kannon a Buddhist deity of mercy and he is identified as Kubera or Kuvera, a Hindu deity of wealth. He's worshipped under many different names in China, India and Japan. I found it fitting for him to be one of the gods attacking the devils of Kuoh.
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