บท 58: Grandpa Turtle
A while later
The duo were walking around aimlessly.
Jin Wu looked upset, "What the hell! I thought Treasures and inheritances were everywhere!" Mu Yu rolled her eyes and retorted, "This is real life! REAL LIFE! You know what that means, otaku?" Jin Wu glared at her, "I will beat you, woman!"
Mu Yu puffed out her chest, "Come on then. Who's afraid of whom?!" Jin Wu tackled her to the ground and Mu Yu sneered before they both heard a cracking sound.
Jin Wu and Mu Yu froze, looking at each other. Jin Wu said seriously, "It wasn't me." Mu Yu burst out laughing as the ground under them collapsed and they disappeared into the hole.
They landed on the ground and Jin Wu sat up, sitting on Mu Yu, smiling as he brushed away his hair, "So comfy~" Mu Yu pushed him off her, standing up, dusting herself off angrily "My clothes! Damn it! Stupid fucking holes!"
Jin Wu dusted himself off and looked around at the pitch black area. There was only light in a circle around them from the sky. He looked up, noticing that they fell a long ways!
He was confused, why weren't they hurt?
Regardless, Jin Wu focused his eyes and the darkness was gradually seen through. Mu Yu did the same and they both gasped. Jin Wu touched his lips, muttering "Was the real MC me this whole time?" Mu Yu slapped the back of his head, laughing, "Shut up, idiot."
They were in a large circular room, full of ancient carvings and statues. There were 4 massive metal doors in the 4 cardinal directions with special carvings on them depicting…
You guessed it!
Azure Dragon, White Tiger, Vermillion Phoenix, and the Black Turtle.
Jin Wu dusted his hands and spit out dust from his lips, complaining "Everywhere you look it's the 4 Symbols over and over again… Don't these guys get tired of writing this garbage?" Mu Yu giggled and walked over to the murals, dragging her fingers across them as she replied, "They are from China. It's normal to be proud of your heritage, right? Plus… Didn't you notice all the literal chinese people everywhere??"
Jin Wu walked over and corrected, "Ancient Chinese. Technically not Chinese yet. Also, this world's history is completely different, the only reason why they have Chinese elements is because the Mythology of Cultivators originates from China. Otherwise where do you think Alchemy comes from? I haven't been to China but I wouldn't be surprised if they still use herbs like in the modern novels."
Mu Yu laughed and looked at him speechlessly, "You can't be serious. Who on Earth would believe that? Modern Medical Science blows all that metaphysical garbage out of the water!" Jin Wu sighed and looked at her helplessly, "There goes all the money from this book…"
Mu Yu didn't care, continuing, "Anyway, isn't this just right? You don't have anything on 4 Mythical Beasts do you?" Jin Wu walked over and looked at the murals, "No. Long Zi doesn't have anything on them either. That might be because he was just a hermit alchemist… actually, that's not true. He does have something but they're all legends."
Mu Yu looked over and Jin Wu waved, "Apparently in Ancient Times in the Immortal World, geniuses would condense Domains with the Power of one of these Beasts. There was even a rumor that the 4 Mythical Beasts had clans that lived to the current Era…"
Mu Yu nodded and replied, "So it's true. They really exist!" Jin Wu's lips twitched and he went on, "Apparently, from the records, their strength was all at the top of the Immortal World… and even." he pointed up and Mu Yu gasped, "Incredible! But what's above the Immortal World?"
Jin Wu snorted, "Isn't it obvious? The Divine Realm." Mu Yu pursed her lips, giggling, "I see you're a fan of NSHBA." Jin Wu blushed and turned away, changing the topic, "Anyway, like I said, these clans used to exist. It's not like they just vanished for no reason."
Mu Yu asked in surprise, "You mean there was a war?" Jin Wu sighed helplessly, "Isn't it always the case?" she pursed her lips and nodded, "Should be. I wonder who it was against…" He looked at her and she smiled wryly, "Some kind of demons, right?"
He shrugged and chuckled, "Who else, really? I just hope it's not that stupid genre of other universes and planes or something…" Mu Yu groaned and found a common ground, hugging his arm with one hand as she complained, "Or how about when you read a good one and then it turns into Star Wars!"
Jin Wu rolled his eyes, "I hate that! Isn't it fun to travel in one place? I don't give a shit about planet 186829269283739 and their plights. God it's so boring! Oho, look at me, I'm a space pirate~" Mu Yu laughed happily and they continued chatting while inspecting the room.
After a few minutes
They came to a door and Mu Yu asked "This one first?" Jin Wu looked at the Black Turtle door, humming, "Sure. The turtle should be the least aggressive. It's just a turtle, how bad can it be?" Mu Yu paused while opening the door and glared at him, "Don't jinx it, idiot!"
Jin Wu was speechless, "I was just saying!" She snorted at him and pushed open the door. The duo walked inside as Jin Wu knocked on the door. His eyes lit up and he waved his hand, collecting the two metal doors, leaving a huge hole.
Mu Yu didn't pay attention to it, holding Jin Wu's hand tightly. She didn't like caves and tight enclosed places. Jin Wu held her small hand and rubbed it with his thumb as they walked forward into the cave.
As they walked deeper, the cave got darker and darker, along with a rising cold wind that smelled a bit like the sea.
Jin Wu and Mu Yu looked around in confusion before coming to a wide open space that was bright as day!
The duo were dumbfounded, staring at the wide open sky, sea, and beach.
There were even little crabs skittering around.
Jin Wu shivered and stepped back from the crabs, Mu Yu teased "Scared of little crabs?" Jin Wu retorted seriously, "Not the crabs themselves, I just don't like them crawling on my feet. Seaweed too. That's why I hate the ocean."
Mu Yu looked at him in disbelief, "You're scared of the ocean?!" Jin Wu was very serious, nodding, "Yes." Mu Yu looked at him and pursed her lips, pulling his hand gently, "Actually, it's not so scary." Jin Wu shook his head and Mu Yu squeezed his hand gently, comforting him.
Suddenly, there was a loud roar that sounded like a Tyrannosaurus from Jurassic Park!
The duo looked up to see a massive flying turtle with a snake around it.
Jin Wu said in shock, "Isn't it supposed to come from the sea?!" Mu Yu was speechless, staring at the mountain-like Black Turtle.
Suddenly, they both heard a loud and angry voice, "Nonsense! I'm a Tortoise! Which fucking Tortoise do you see living in the sea?! Grandpa Black will smash him to death!" Jin Wu and Mu Yu froze, staring at the Black Tortoise in a daze.
The Black Tortoise looked down with both heads, smacking his turtle lips, "Bah bah! Two little human bastards! Grandpa Turtle will grant you both three wishes." Jin Wu said in shock, "Really?!" Mu Yu asked, "Didn't you say Grandpa Black before? How did you become a Turtle again?"
The Black Tortoise burst out laughing, "Of course not! Hahaha! Grandpa Snake doesn't grant wishes, are you mentally retarded?! Bahahahaha!" Mu Yu nearly collapsed, "Grandpa snake now?!"
The Black Tortoise snorted, "Whatever grandpa I want to be, I will be! Grandpa Bird doesn't care about titles!" Jin Wu asked, "Are you a turtle then?" The Black Tortoise exploded, "BOY, I AM A TORTOISE! TORTOISE! UNDERSTAND?! DO YOU NEED GRANDPA SWORD IMMORTAL TO SLAP YOU TO DEATH?!"
Jin Wu shook his head and the Black Tortoise snorted in satisfaction, "Good! Now what did you come here for? Grandpa White hasn't seen humans for 1,058,762 years." Mu Yu was shocked, asking in disbelief, "You're older than a million years!?"
The Black Tortoise laughed, "Of course, this Grandpa is a turtle!" then he froze and roared, "Bastards! I mean Tortoise! You tricked me?!" the duo were dumbfounded, the snake suddenly spoke, "You called yourself turtle, you stupid bastard."
The Tortoise head turned and snapped its jaws at the snake, "You stupid woman! If you weren't so clingy and pleasing to the eye, grandpa turt- Bah! Tortoise would've abandoned you!" The snake ignored him, looking down at the duo, hissing "What year is it?"
Jin Wu's lips twitched, my lord… Are you a time traveler? Do you also have a Sports Almanac?
Mu Yu replied "985 of the Lunar Calendar." The Black Tortoise was confused all at once.
Jin Wu looked up and said, "Alright, Grandpa Tortoise, you've been here for millions of years, right? There's no way you'll know what year it actually is. Humans have probably been extinguished and revived more than 1000 times. Let me tell you, if you want to know how long it's been since you roamed free, then I can only tell you, in all of human history and records from ancient humans, you're not even mentioned!"
The Black Tortoise was angry in an instant, "Bastards! I can't believe this! When Grandpa Kunpeng roamed the Jianghu, the ancestors of your ancestors' ancestors were still playing in the mud!" Jin Wu scratched his cheek and nodded, "Add a few more ancestors."
The Black Tortoise was stunned and Mu Yu asked, "Senior Grandpa, why are you in here?" Black Tortoise grit his 'beak', "It's all that damn bastard Vermillion Bird! He said something about protecting the Realm… I don't remember, it's been so long. Grandpa Shark isn't an elephant! Grandpa Mouse can only tell you one thing, in the center room, under the central altar, a Demon is being sealed."
He looked down and clicked his tongue, "With your little ant-like cultivation bases, you'll be turned to blood mist before you even see what it looks like. Come to think of it, Grandpa Buffalo forgot what it looks like, but I remember it was ugly! Baahahah!"
Jin Wu and Mu Yu looked at each other, exchanging knowing glances. Mu Yu turned to the Black Tortoise, "Grandpa, are you from the Divine Realm?" The Black Tortoise looked at Mu Yu and narrowed his eyes, "Not bad, Nizi. You have this knowledge! Seems you're not so simple!"
Jin Wu curled his lips up and Mu Yu puffed her cheeks, Jin Wu looked at the Black Tortoise, asking "Senior Grandpa Tortoise and Senior Grandma Snake, junior is not talented and useless, but I've always respected Senior deep in my heart!" The Black Tortoise rolled in the sky, very happy with the praise.
Jin Wu cut to the chase, "Can Senior share your knowledge with Junior? It's junior's dream to bring back heroes such as yourself from Ancient Times. Even reviving Senior's Inheritance and blood is this junior's biggest dream!"
The Black Tortoise nodded, "Very admirable! This Grandpa Gopher is very pleased. However, I'm only a remnant soul at the moment. My knowledge is dwindling as we speak. This area nourishes my soul, however, not all of my deeds are remembered…"
Jin Wu was regretful, sighing "A pity." The Black Tortoise snorted and bellowed, "Slow! This Grandpa's deeds cannot go unpraised! This Grandpa will fulfill you!" as a bright white light shone into Jin Wu's skull.
It was a ton of knowledge!
For the Black Tortoise it was regrettable… because all his bragging deeds were forgotten! The only thing left was all his techniques, methods, skills, etc! This was simply a treasure trove of knowledge!
Jin Wu laughed on the inside, he was happy as can be!
Then he looked at everything closely… and his face collapsed.
All these techniques were incomplete! Everything was incomplete!
Damn it all! Ahhhhh!
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