บท 68: Getting My Priorities Straight
Shawn POV:
We were given a dorm to rest in for the day before heading out to Europe, well more specifically, the United Kingdom. With it still being the first year of the war, most countries opted to fight it independently, not wanting the help of any foreign countries. Spain, France, and Germany were all such countries that did not seek the help of others, but all had lost their capitals at the beginning of the war and were in a constant struggle to retake it.
The United Kingdom was the first to accept Overwatch's help, but only for medical assistance. Therefore, I among many other medical operatives were being deployed there to assist their troops.
Since we were given the chance to rest, no matter how short, I was going to get all that I could as war was stressful. Hopping into the bed, not bothering to take my uniform off, I attempt to go to sleep. But negative thoughts and emotions drift along the back of mind, keeping me from immediately going to sleep. After a couple of minutes, my eyes slowly open to see S3bastian sitting at the mirror, looking at himself.
Now that I think about it, he was quiet at our meeting with Adawe. Maybe I should be grateful that he's not saying the most unhinged things at the inappropriate times. As if he knew I was thinking about him, he turns to me.
"Shawn, what are we doing here?" He questions.
"We're trying to get some rest before we get sent to..." I begin to explain to him.
"No. I know that. I meant here, with Overwatch. Like what exactly is our purpose here?" He asks again.
I sit up. "Overwatch is the best means to saving humanity and ending the war. You know as well as I do that if we were by ourselves that we wouldn't last. Plus, there are many benefits to being a hero." I explain to him.
"Shawn. You and I are the least likely to be considered heroes. Although they are faint, I have some memories before I was Awakened but I remember enough to know that I raised you. I know you better than yourself, and I know that you couldn't care less about humanity." He says, turning to face me.
I sit up and stare in disbelief at his accusation. "That's not true, I've done plenty for people. What about the prosthetic?"
"That was for money because your dad's allowance wasn't cutting it for you." He responds.
"What about when I worked with the government and gave them weapons that will help them in this war?"
"That was to get a name for yourself and get their weapons in compensation as well. Everything you do was for yourself, Shawn. Not that I'm admonishing you for that." He responds.
Now he was just getting me annoyed. "Well, don't be shy, you never were one to hold back words before, where is all this coming from? What do you want?"
He sighs, turning back towards the mirror. "I've been thinking about what you've said to me. Many times, have you pulled me to the side, threatened me. You were tired of my outbursts and behavior, so you wanted me to be normal. You do realize that prior to my Awakening, you made me a weapon of mass destruction. When the Awakening happened, there were so many programs you installed in me that conflicted with my old self, what you're looking at is the byproduct of that."
His words cut me like a knife as I realize the truth behind them. As the list of programs, I absentmindedly installed into a butler omnic to prepare for the war flash through my mind, I almost cry myself at his pain. "Listen S3bastian, I'm sorry, I never realized that I did that."
He turns back to me, and if he was capable of crying, he would be doing it now. "I've realized after the last time that you were ignorant of this, so I forgive you. You wanted me to think about what I wanted our relationship to be. Despite what I say or do, I need you, Shawn as much as you need me. If you die, what am I going to do? Fight with Anubis? I'll be a weapon with no purpose." He explains to me.
Trying hard to not cry myself, I respond, "Thanks S3bastian. I, too, haven't been the best of people and treated you like shit. From now on, let's both strive to better ourselves."
"That being said, I have to ask, how do you think you did in that interrogation?" He asks, turning serious.
'That was an interrogation?' I question in my head.
Seeing my moment of confusion, he places his hand on his head, shaking it. "Well if you didn't recognize that as an interrogation then I can go ahead and tell you that you did bad, terrible even. They're suspicious of you,' Shawn. We stick out like sore thumbs. They know that we're not heroes, and just playing the part. Which brings me back to my earlier question? Why are we here, risking our lives for people when they hear about what we've done in California, cast us out like criminals? What is our end goal?" He asks me.
In the 5,000 languages that he knows, he chose to speak facts. I realized that I actually never really told him what was to come. Opening the door, I look down the hall both ways to see if anyone was listening outside before asking him if there were any bugs in the room.
After he confirms there aren't any, I begin to tell him everything. Everything that is supposed to happen, everyone that will matter, what everyone is capable of in the future. After I'm done, I can see the gears in his head working, trying to process everything I've just told him.
[A/N Everyone up to Mauga at this point because that's when I wrote this.]
"Damn." Is all he says after a couple of seconds.
"I know right." I respond.
"I'm more stuck on the talking monkey more than the blue woman who is a legendary sniper. By the way, why dismiss working for Talon?" He curiously asks me.
"Basically, they're a bunch of cutthroats who have no concern for each other. One wrong move, or I attract anyone's interest, and I'm dead. I don't have to worry about that while I'm with Overwatch." I explain.
"Well, right now that's true, but I wouldn't throw that Talon invitation when you get it anyway so quickly. There's a lot that they have to offer. Plus, I think you'll fit right in if you know who not to mess with and not to trust."
His offer does sound tempting, if I was a part of Talon, I wouldn't have to worry about them hunting me when Overwatch disbands.
"Ok, any other suggestions?" I ask him.
"This Ana woman, you said, she deals with something called nanites in the future. Based on how you described them, they'll be perfect for you, as you have that whole bioelectricity thing going on." He says.
I deadpan as I realize he's right. Nanites would make me overpowered. Of course, we had no idea if Ana invented these nanobots or how she came across them, but I could definitely try my hand at being the first to invent them.
I look over at him, "You know, when you're not being an ass, you're actually pretty smart."
He looks back at me, "You know, when you're not being a naive bitch, you're pretty badass."
At his words, there's silence in the room before we both break out into laughter. Strangely, after that conversation, I have no problems drifting off to sleep.
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