บท 54: It's Becoming Quite Challenging For Me To Handle Your Insatiable Appetite On My Own
Cian opened up to Maya, sharing every detail of that fateful night—from the moment he discreetly listened to the events unfolding in the room, to his audacious request to his father to hand over Vera. As he finished recounting the story, Maya couldn't help but let out a playful giggle.
"Fufu... You're like a knight in shining armor, coming to the rescue of a damsel in distress," Maya chuckled, picturing the scene in her mind. "I bet you looked pretty cool in her eyes at that moment."
Cian, perplexed by Maya's reaction, furrowed his brow. "Cool? I don't understand why you would say that. I simply did what any reasonable person would have done in that situation. It was the right thing to do, nothing more."
Maya's laughter subsided, and she gazed at him with a mix of amusement and tenderness. "Oh, Master, you truly don't grasp the complexities of a maiden's heart, do you? Even someone as intelligent as you wouldn't fully comprehend. The reasons why our hearts race for someone else can be unpredictable and enigmatic."
Maya's words echoed in Cian's mind, her reminder that his expertise in the realm of sex did not automatically translate to being adept in matters of love. He pondered her words, acknowledging the truth in them.
"Now that I have a clearer understanding of what transpired that night, I have a theory as to why Vera behaved the way she did. But please remember, what I'm about to say is just my speculation, so take it with a grain of salt," Maya continued, her voice steady as she took a deep breath. "As I mentioned before, Vera's emotional development seems stunted, akin to that of a child. It's possible that her lack of love and nurturing during childhood hindered her mental growth. Children require certain elements, such as a parent's love, in order to mature emotionally."
The absence of a parent's love can hinder a child's mental growth, and this was particularly true for Vera. Her mother had passed away, leaving her without the nurturing affection she desperately needed. Furthermore, her father, who should have filled that void, did not raise her with warmth and care. Consequently, Vera found herself unable to attain the mental and emotional growth she longed for.
"Even though Vera's circumstances prevented her from experiencing proper mental growth, she was still a child at heart," Maya continued. "Children have an intense need for affection, more than anyone else. That's why she unquestioningly followed your father's instructions, no matter how absurd they seemed. It was her way of seeking his affection and validation. If she received praise or acknowledgment from him, even in unconventional ways, she cherished it."
Despite being treated as nothing more than a pawn, she still yearned for her father's affection. But...
"...However, when her father uttered those words, dismissing her as nothing more than a tool for his ambitions of world conquest, it shattered her entire being. Everything that had sustained her up until that moment crumbled in an instant. To Vera, he was still her father, but in his eyes, she was merely a pawn, not even recognized as his own flesh and blood."
With a heavy sigh, Maya shifted her body, reclining slightly, and Cian followed suit, mirroring her movement.
"...Yet, amidst the darkness that engulfed her, a glimmer of hope emerged when she laid eyes on you. When you spoke those words of care, promising to be there for her, and when you embraced her that fateful night, her heart was flooded with warmth. In that moment, you became the sole beacon of light in her world, Master."
"...I understand the circumstances better now, but I'm still struggling to comprehend why she's avoiding me."
Maya, ever the mischievous one, offered him a reassuring smile, her pearly white teeth gleaming in the light. "Allow me to delve deeper into the heart of the matter," she said, her tone full of intrigue. With that, she reclined once more, her gaze directed towards the ceiling, while Cian kept his eyes fixed upon her profile. "It was in that very moment, the precise instant when you entered Vera's life, that she finally experienced the embrace of love," Maya began, her voice tinged with a sense of revelation. "You bestowed upon her the affection and care she had long yearned for. It is no wonder, then, that she found herself falling in love with you, even though you are her brother."
Indeed, it was during that pivotal moment that Vera's heart was awakened to love, which she had never truly known before at that moment.
"And considering the pain of abandonment she had just endured," Maya continued, a gentle smile gracing her lips, "it is understandable why she sought reassurance from you, questioning whether you, too, would abandon her. She simply does not wish to relive the anguish of abandonment once more."
Cian averted his gaze from Maya, staring at the ceiling in contemplation. "I've reassured her countless times that I will never abandon her. Why can't she trust me?"
Maya studied him intently, her gaze fixed upon his profile. "Master, she trusts you more than anyone in this world," she replied, her voice carrying a sense of unwavering loyalty. "While my devotion to you surpasses that of anyone else, body and soul, Vera's trust in you runs even deeper. However, trust does not necessarily equate to absolute certainty that you will never abandon her."
Her gaze returned to the ceiling, contemplating the complexity of a maiden's heart. "The inner workings of a woman's heart are intricate and intricate to navigate. While what I shared earlier was an analysis based on observations and information, I can confidently affirm that she trusts you. Nevertheless, Master, I must impart something of great significance, although it cannot be guaranteed as an absolute truth. This is something even Vera herself may not be fully aware of. Yes, she harbors strong affection for you, but her love for you resembles that of familial love."
In other words, Vera's love for Cian was reminiscent of how a typical sister would love her younger brother.
"...So she doesn't love me romantically, then?"
Maya couldn't help but giggle, her eyes fixated on Cian's profile. "Fufu... Oh, how I wish I had a camera to capture the expression on your face just now, Master."
Cian turned his gaze back to Maya. "What kind of expression did I have?"
"You appeared pained when I mentioned that Vera's love for you resembles familial love. But fret not, Master. Never underestimate the depth of her love for you. It is a genuine, profound love, and in truth, she loves you even more than she realizes. Remember, when I say it resembles a familial love, I mean that her affection for you is platonic."
"Platonic?"
"Yes, precisely. It means her love for you is purely non-sexual, Master. It stands in stark contrast to the way I love you."
While Maya's love for Cian involved both emotional connection and physical intimacy, she understood that Vera's feelings were entirely different.
"That's precisely why Vera cannot offer herself to you, Master. It's not just because her love for you is platonic, but also due to her deep-seated trauma of abandonment. She's terrified that if she were to give herself to you, you might abandon her once your desires are fulfilled, just like your father used her for his ambitions and discarded her when she no longer served a purpose. Additionally, she fears that she would be incapable of bringing you pleasure, imagining herself as a passive participant in bed, unlike the way I engage with you..."
""And is that why she has been avoiding me?"
Maya nodded, her smile now tinged with empathy. "Yes, although I cannot claim absolute certainty, I believe that's the underlying reason behind her avoidance. Vera is currently grappling with a mental and emotional crisis. She finds herself torn between wanting to prove her love to you through sex, while simultaneously fearing the consequences of abandonment. Master, I implore you to grant her the time and space she needs to contemplate and sort out her feelings."
Maya's words were filled with genuine concern as she gazed at Cian, her expression conveying the depth of her understanding.
"I believe Vera is in the midst of a profound internal struggle. Please, Master, be patient and allow her the opportunity to find her own resolution."
"I would never force her into anything she's not ready for. I've made it clear that we will only engage in intimacy when she feels comfortable and ready."
Maya nodded, her gaze filled with understanding. "Indeed, Master. What I'm suggesting is that you give her the time she needs to truly navigate her own emotions, and in turn, take the time to reflect on your own feelings as well."
"My feelings?" Cian repeated, his voice laced with curiosity.
"Yes," Maya confirmed gently. "Ask yourself, are you in love with Vera as a whole woman, with all her complexities and virtues, or are you solely drawn to her for her physical attributes?"
"That goes without saying." Cian's eyes sparkled with sincerity, leaving no room for doubt. His love for Vera encompassed her entirety.
A warm smile graced Maya's lips. "That's wonderful to hear, Master. While I never doubted your intentions, I simply wanted to ensure clarity. Now, let me remind you that love and sex are fundamentally different aspects. Love can be expressed without engaging in sexual activities, just as one can have sex without genuine love. They are interconnected, but not always inseparable. So, Master..." Maya paused, taking a deep breath before continuing. "You can love each other deeply and profoundly, even without the presence of physical intimacy. You can reciprocate her platonic love in the same way. It's not a compromise to be frowned upon, is it?"
Cian pondered for a moment, his expression thoughtful. "I suppose that arrangement is indeed a great solution. Even without engaging in sexual acts, we can still express our love for each other in meaningful ways. If Vera is comfortable with that, then..." A smile slowly emerged on his face, the first in a week's time.
Maya's smile matched his, radiating warmth and relief. "That's wonderful, Master," she replied, genuinely pleased with his response. However, her tone shifted as she continued, "However, if we are going to pursue this arrangement, you'll need to find another partner to satisfy your sexual desires. It's becoming quite challenging for me to handle your insatiable appetite on my own..."
"I had assumed that such arrangements were meant to keep me exclusively to yourself, but it seems I was mistaken."
Maya's smile turned slightly stiff as she nodded. "Yes, Master, that wasn't actually my intention. Now that Vera is no longer available for sexual intimacy, I will become the sole recipient of your almost insatiable lust. I do hope you'll be considerate at times. It's becoming quite challenging for me to focus on my work when my legs tremble from the relentless pounding during the night..."
Cian chuckled, realizing the predicament. "I understand. I will seek out other partners to fulfill my needs. In truth, I have already begun to explore such possibilities. However, it may take some time to convince them to join our cause. In the meantime, you will be the sole recipient of my desires. If you wish to satiate my lust, you'll have to work even harder," he said playfully.
Maya forced a stiff smile. "I will do my very best to satisfy your needs, Master..."
•••••
Charlotte found herself awakened by the passionate moans emanating from the neighboring room. The explicit sounds stirred her imagination, igniting a desire within her to indulge in a solitary pleasure, fantasizing about being the woman engaged in passionate lovemaking with the man on the other side of the wall. However, her reverie was abruptly interrupted by the emergence of a different voice, causing her to listen more intently.
As the voices grew quieter, Charlotte resorted to pressing her ear against the wall, desperate to catch any remaining fragments of the erotic encounter. Yet, to her disappointment, the room fell into a silence that left her yearning for more.
"No luck, huh?" she murmured softly, removing her ear from the wall. "And here I was getting all excited..." Her panties were already dampened by the arousing sounds, but now her fleeting chance at self-indulgence had slipped away, leaving her unsatisfied.
"...Well, I suppose I should just go back to..." With a resigned sigh, Charlotte decided to return to her bed, ready to succumb to sleep's embrace. However, just as she was about to settle in, her gaze was drawn to a disconcerting sight. Outside the inn, a group of men dressed in black surrounded the premises, their hands tightly gripping submachine guns.
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