บท 26: 26. Not a normal girl (El, Hopper and Mike)
A/N: Y'all... This came out kind of dark! I was going to make it more tame, but Idk what happened lol. I had to get her inside a doctor's office, and I don't even know why it ended up being a gyno lmao. I wanted Hop to take her to get like a HPV vaccine or something like that, but I looked it up (I did my research, kiddos) and the first vaccine was made in like 2006, so... that does not apply to this timeline lol. This is for KatelynE1izabeth.
PROMPT: Mileven where El has a PTSD moment. Aged around 17, ends with fluff/smut (Did neither lol).
El was aware that she was not a normal girl. Sometimes it was easy to forget she didn't have a life until a few years ago because of her friends and family. They always made her feel so included and they were always in tune with her. They made her feel comfortable, like she was meant to be with them, like she belonged there. And with them, she does.
But sometimes they'd talk about a certain show they watched when they were little, or ask her what her favorite baby food was, and their eyes go wide and they wince in apology, because they too forget she didn't have a normal childhood, and that she spent her early years being prodded by needles in a lab while they were watching Wheelie and the Chopper Bunch.
She knew she wasn't a normal girl, and there were times that she was reminded of it in a horrible way.
Hopper had always been protective of her. Maybe it was because he knew her past and how she used to live, maybe it was because he once had a daughter and he didn't have the chance to experience with her what she was living with him, or maybe it was because he loved her and he worried over her. Maybe it was all three of the above (she definitely knew the third reason was true).
So, when Hopper found out Mike and her were having sex, he (naturally) blew a gasket.
She didn't really plan on him finding out about it; she just thought her and Mike's relationship would progress until they were married and then she would plop a baby on Hopper's lap and obviously he would have to know how it was made. She definitely never thought her dad would find out by finding a used condom in her room.
He freaked out (obviously), yelling about respect, and STD's, and it was only when he began talking about shotguns and 'Mike Wheeler is dead', she snapped awake from her I'm-nodding-like-I-understand-what-you're-telling-me-but-I'm-basically-asleep-right-now Hopper-induced coma and decided to calm him down.
"Fine," Hopper had sighed as he ran an exasperated hand across his face. "But we're going to get you a check up with a gynecologist or something. You need to be safe. And we're bringing Wheeler, too."
She didn't really understand what a gynecologist was, but she agreed if that meant he would get out of her room so she could pick up the condom from the floor and call Mike.
She really should have asked.
"You okay, kid?" Hopper asked her as the elevator they were in traveled upwards, noticing the way she tapped her fingers against her thigh.
"Just- closed spaces." She admitted with a humorless chuckle.
Mike reached down and grasped her hand in his, squeezing gently as he leaned down to kiss her head. Hopper placed a comforting hand on her other shoulder, rubbing warmly, and she felt enormously comforted by both.
She didn't know what it was, but she felt uneasy; uncomfortable, anxious and hesitant. There was something in the air that made her chest tighten and her stomach flutter around. She thought maybe it was the elevator, and she held onto that thought until she was inside the doctor's office.
The woman was kind, and she had a warm smile on her face, but her white robe reminded her too much of the scientists back in the lab, and the patient's chair reminded her too much of the little bed they made her lie on when they ran tests on her, and the white floor reminded her of the one back in the testing room, and—
"El?" Mike murmured quietly next to her while the doctor explained the different anti conceptive methods.
She shook her head and smiled at him, grasping his hand back in hers with a gulp as she turned back to the doctor.
She wasn't there.
She was here, with this nice lady doctor who had the whitest teeth El had ever seen, with her dad, who would protect her from anyone from her past, and with Mike, who loved her unconditionally and made everything better.
She grounded herself with happy thoughts, actually paying attention and responding to the doctor when she questioned her, but the fluttering in her stomach and the tightening in her chest didn't go away.
It was only when she made her go behind a little curtain to change, and when she sent both Mike and Hopper out, that she realized she had trouble breathing.
She stared at the paper gown in her shaking hands, cringing when the fabric crinkled easily in her grasp, and she had the sudden need to tear it to pieces. The color and the material weren't the same, but she couldn't tell the difference between it and the hospital gown she had worn inside the lab.
She breathed hard, her chest heaving up and down with the effort, and her eyes closed tightly at the brightness of the room, and her tears were running freely down her sticky cheeks, and suddenly it was too cold, it was too white, it was too bright, and it was too hard to stand up, and she was alone, and she was back in the lab, and she could feel the hundreds of needles inserted in her skin, and she could feel Papa's breath on her ear as he ordered her to go into the Void, and it was too dark, and she was alone in the Upside Down, and- there it was, the monster was there, and then she was opening the Gate, and there was blood, so much blood, and it was her fault, her fault, her fault.
Unbeknownst to her, she was sobbing loudly, sitting against the wall with her knees to her chest, and her hands over her ears as she closed her eyes tightly, and the stupid paper gown was balled up next to her.
Gasps left her lips as she cried, scared out of her mind for being there, and she didn't want the stupid doctor touching her, she didn't want to listen as she tried to comfort her. Mike was there in an instant, hugging her to his chest and rubbing her back as she sobbed against his neck, wetting the collar of his cotton shirt, and she just wanted to get out of there; she just wanted to be out, to be out, to be out.
"Get her outside, now." She heard Hopper scream through the ringing in her ears, and then Mike was pulling her up, and the desk lady that had received them when they entered the building was staring at her in shock, and then she saw the front doors of the building.
She ran out of Mike's arms, away from the enclosed space of the building, through the glass doors towards the fresh air, clean of any sterile scents and full of life. The birds chirped and the sunlight hit her skin and then she was running through the parking lot.
"El!" She heard someone call her, but she wanted to be away.
"El!" She kept running.
"EL!"
And then big arms were around her.
"No!" She struggled, not wanting to be dragged in again. "No! I want to be out, I want to be out!"
"El, El! Listen! El, it's me!"
"Don't make me go back inside! I want to be out, please, please, please!" Her tears blurred her vision, but she would always recognize the blue and black flannel and she finally realized her dad was the one in front of her.
"I'm sorry," Hopped panted. "I'm sorry, sweetheart. I'm so sorry."
"I don't want to go back in," She cried against his chest, breathing in the familiar scent and hugging him as tight as she could, as if she could melt in his embrace and never suffer again. "Please don't make me go back in there, dad, please."
"It's okay, El. It's okay, sweetie, it's over. I'm sorry." Hopper sniffled against her temple as he rubbed circles on her back and hugged her back just as tightly.
She wept, her cries rocking her body, as the terror and anxiety subsided, letting her fear seep out in her tears.
She was a little girl again, crying over bad nightmares in Hopper's arms while he soothed her with warm hugs and loving words.
Mike was fidgeting behind them, holding himself back from ripping her out of Hopper's arms and holding her himself, but waiting his turn as the Chief calmed her down. Tears were running down his face from the wild fear that had cursed trough his body at her state. He had never seen her get so scared in his life, and he would rather break his neck than see her like that ever again. He shared a look with Hopper over El's head, and the red rimmed eyes the bigger man looked him with were enough proof that he was just as scared as Mike.
A few minutes later, when El's sobs had fallen to wet sniffles, Hopper gave her one last kiss, and then walked her back to the Blazer. Mike trailed behind them again, wringing his hands in uneasiness as the Chief continued murmuring against El's hair while they walked.
Once they were next to the cruiser, Hopper gave him a look and then separated himself from her.
Mike nearly leaped in the air to take his girlfriend in his arms, sighing in relief once she hugged him softly. Hopper opened the door to the backseat for them, and Mike pushed El in first. He closed the door behind him once he was in, while Hopper started the car in the front seat.
El shuffled until her legs were draped over his lap, sneaking an arm behind his back to keep hugging him as they began pulling out of the parking lot.
They didn't say anything, letting the silence engulf them as Mike kissed her head repeatedly, cradling her in his embrace and rocking her a little to assure himself that she was safe. Hopper smoked all the way home, the window open to let the smoke out, and Mike would've been impressed by the way he was going through the whole pack of cigarettes if he wasn't so busy staring at the brunette in his arms.
The Chief didn't even need to ask if Mike would be going to the cabin; he only drove there, and then he walked behind the couple as Mike guided his daughter through the fallen leaves in the woods.
When they were inside, Hopper took El in his arms again, pressing a kiss to her forehead as she leaned her head against his shoulder and sighed quietly. "I'm sorry, sweetie. I love you."
"I love you, too." She croaked out, her voice broken and scratchy from not using it for nearly an hour and from the crying, and then she buried her face against her father's chest, snuggling into him for a few soft seconds, before she separated them.
"I'm okay." She smiled weakly as tears ran down Hopper's face, and she raised her hands to wipe them away with her thumbs as Mike averted his eyes.
Hopper took her hand and kissed her palm in apology, looking into her eyes and having a silent conversation with her that didn't need explaining.
He sighed, nodding to himself, and then she turned around to take Mike's hand in hers, walking in the direction of her room.
She heard her dad open a kitchen cabinet, and then she heard him go outside, no doubt with the bottle of whiskey he kept stashed. Mike closed the door behind them, and she took of her jacket with closed eyes, basking in the calmness of her room. She took off her boots, placed them by her window, and then took off her pants.
Mike was in the middle of closing the curtains when she stopped him.
"Let the light in." She mumbled as she got in bed.
He nodded, understanding, and then he took off his sweater, shoes, and jeans, too. They looked at each other with gentle eyes once Mike got inside the covers with her, their bare legs rubbing against each other for warmth.
Sex wasn't in their mind right now; only wanting to hold each other as close as possible without the obstruction of clothes in their way.
"I love you so much." El murmured quietly.
"Me, too, El. So much. So much, you have no idea." Mike whispered against her forehead, and then he leaned down to kiss her lips and gather her closer.
She closed her eyes and she didn't see Brenner again; she didn't see the Demogorgon, and the darkness wasn't like the Void's; she still felt down, but she wasn't scared anymore. She had her dad, and she had Mike, and she could control her life now. She could walk out of situations that made her uncomfortable because she was free.
She wasn't a normal girl, but she was okay with that.
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