บท 73: A fateful meeting, a strangely named unicorn and a rocket
Houston we have a problem; really, a new request came in. This time, he who shall not be named, you know, the one they call James asked, for a certain character I had never heard about to join the story in search of a rocket.
Whoever this Aurora person was, don't you think she had nothing better to do than come here and search for a figurative rocket?
Who knew, maybe unlike me, she had a world to save from Evil or do literally anything else...something that was far more important than playing an idle game till the end of time.
Besides, why would such a piece of technology even exist in this setting?
Did you want to give the system stupid ideas? Because that is how they got those ludicrous concepts. We have enough on our hands already, don't you dare make things any worse than they already were.
But, what annoyed me the most was the request the dude made: "It's dangerous to go alone! Take this PS. Read NobleQueenBee's Book, Empress of the World. Bring the character known as Aurora into the book and have her help MC in finding the rocket. This chapter must be family friendly."
Family-friendly, he said, family-friendly. My story had been family-friendly all this fricking time, wasn't that right Uniporn?
"69," spoke the unicorn suffering from major brain damage.
The gall to insinuate that this story could not be read by kids of any age...I would have you know, not every human on this wide Earth was a WN-reader. Most of them actually were able to read. However, it was a different matter altogether if they should be reading it.
Enough of the useless prattle. Let us start whatever strange idea the system wanted me to play along with. I snapped my fingers and unsurprisingly nothing happened.
And I snapped my fingers again. To absolutely no one's surprise, there was no reaction.
Fine, if you wanna play like that. "Oh no, please do not let anything happen right now, that would be so, so, so bad. I could hardly bear such bad news to come over me!"
And, all of a sudden, there was a portal amidst the chaos. Who could have seen such a dramatic plot twist coming? Lemme tell you I was shook to my core.
What a dramatic twist of events, which led to the unpredictable conclusion that a portal from another novel world would appear here. Who could have guessed that the copyright-stealing system would also steal someone else's intellectual property?
But the shock was far from over because a real person walked through the unstable portal!!!
Who might this strange person be? Did she come in peace or would she swallow my soul? Or worse, did she come here because I did not pay my powerstone taxes?
She was slightly shorter than average and slim. Her arms were strong because she was pretty deadly with a bow, but not athletic.
Where did I have all that information from, you ask? Well, I simply read it in her bio.
[Empress Aurora of the Valiant Empire (and all humanity, also known as Sojourner to the Land of Magic, Favored of the Fates, One who has walked with the Maker....]
The list went on for ages, and I could not be bothered to read through it all. She was here to find a rocket that did not yet exist. Nothing more and nothing less. Okay, you metaphysics nerds, it's hard for something to be less than nothing─so shut your trap.
Speaking of the devil, the Empress walked out of the world and her eyes darted around trying to make sense of her surroundings.
Good luck with that, chief. If you find some, lemme know.
A few seconds later, her eyes spotted the gigantic sentient Ancient Evil Wishmoppu, the abomination of dead rats, and me who was inside of said gigantic blob-like entity.
Her dark eyes seemed to have arrived at the conclusion that this was just a dream. I couldn't blame her one bit─I wish I had been dreaming too.
For a while, we just stared at one another unsure of how to proceed with the strange situation we found ourselves in. The silence was broken by the temporary character after I refused to give the system any more ammunition to fire against me.
"I am Empress Aurora of the Valiant Empire, who might you be, Sir?" she implored courteously, trying her best not to address the elephant in the room.
"People call me Author. Nice to make your acquaintance. Do forgive my lack of manners, but the current surroundings make it not easy for me to partake in such pleasantries. I hope you find it in you to forgive these transgressions of mine."
Must keep it family-friendly....Must keep it family-friendly.
Many words were currently on my mind and none of those were PG.
"Dear Sir Author, I have come as a bearer of terrible news. The world of Valiant has been taken over by wicked creatures. The foul spawn have grasped the world in their vile claws. Circumstances are dire. I have come to seek aid in the battle versus the forces of Evil"
With a small curtsy, she sought to gain a powerful ally in me.
It'd be a breeze to just throw in the endless hordes of immortal clones to take care of the problem. Though this might not be the intended solution the other author might have created for her.
"This indeed is a crisis most terrible and unheard of. I would offer you my full support; were it not for these two mighty creatures being locked in battle. It is my duty to watch over them and bring balance back to this universe."
Disappointment became visible in her eyes; how could it not? She also might have realized just how abnormally normal I truly was, but that was not the point.
"Dear child of the Fates, do not be disappointed, for I have devised you a tool to find allies with. Step into this magical device referred to by its old, nearly forgotten name: Rocket"
Next to me was, of course, a rocket. Not questioning the legitimacy of the story at hand was the best tool to preserve the last bit of sanity left in me. Simply, playing along and pretending that all of this was normal was my best idea.
"Thank you, good Sir. If I may ask; how does this marvellous contraception function?"
Come on, why did we have to make this into rocket science now? Could she not just have stepped into the rocket? Why did things always have to be this hard?
"Well, a rocket is a magical tool that uses explosions to fly into orbit"
After a long internal debate, this was the only explanation I could come up with. Don't blame me I ain't the rocket scientist you were looking for.
"What a fascinating device! Good Sir, I do apologize, but I must bid you adieu. Time is of the essence, my people need to be saved. Fare thee well."
Saying this, she stepped into the rocket, which I didn't even bother to describe, and was launched into space.
Yes, this was most certainly a very normal chapter, yes.
And now back to the important things in life. Let us watch ads again. After all, this was just a dream.
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