บท 12: Volume 1 part 12.
-It was a moment I could never imagine, ever. Even if I get hit by a thunderbolt, & even if there were obvious hints, why...? Just why have I seen this?
Earlier;
Like yesterday, breakfast was same, but I told Renaquinn's father, & mother to have a good day, I ruffled Thomas's hair, smiled at them. Because I really didn't want to die, bit by bit, if I changed how the original Renaquinn lived, I hoped my death would be prevented, that I won't live the same way as I did before.
Really, I wouldn't admit it, but I had lots of regrets, even though living was painful, I still wanted to live. I wanted step-brother to like me, I wanted grandmother to apologize, I wanted to give that family a proof I didn't kill my foster parents, the ones who took me in. Most of all, I wanted to have more friends, I wanted to laugh, & talk to my family, I wanted to be happy with the one I love. Too many regrets, I still carry them, even as I wished that I'd become someone else genuinely, I also... still wanted to be me.
So, I would survive this time, that's what I thought.
At the academy, the gazes were as scary as ever, but I managed to ignore them. Because this time I was truly determined. It was amazing, unbelievable, how one word could encourage someone so much. 'Maybe,' wasn't even an answer, but it felt like... my step-brother suddenly showed up in front of me, and apologized. The classroom was as noisy as usual, & this time, Akito didn't look surprised. However, the heroine wasn't in her seat, which doabled my good mood. Beside that I saw someone familiar in the class; blue eyes, & fluffy hair, that guy from before! The boy was sitting on the seat in front of Akito, his legs resting on the table while his eyes stared at me in a threatening way. Because of that, I didn't plan to act like I knew him. Though staring at him for a while, made me realize how popular Akito, & he really were, as most of the girls, besides glaring at me, they stared blatantly at the boys. Like them, I also couldn't help but stare at them because of the godly aura they were exuding, but it seemed Akito noticed my gaze. Suddenly, he turned towards me, & frowned, while I snapped my head to the other direction so hard that my neck hurt.
It only added to my resolution, the fact that he hated the villainess Renaquinn, but well, that determination crumbled as soon as I opened my book though; f*ck, I forgot that I can't read.
After three seconds of staring at the book, I slammed it shut immediately, because honestly, I was about to throw up.
-So, how do I ecape out of this hell?
'Renaquinn, are you not going to open your book?'
'No...' I grumbled, not realizing it was the teacher that asked the question until the gasps, & snickers; ugh, omg. What kind of unlucky day is this?!
'I mean... can I use the bathroom real quick?' I jolted up; let's miss all the classes today! some part of me screamed, while my concsience scolded me for ruining the real Renaquinn's (probably) good grades.
As the teacher was looking away for a sec there, I took the pink wallet I found inside the bag, & hid it behind. Though the teacher did notice my movement, she just sighed; 'Fine then, go.'
~
'This is sooo~ wrong, but what can I do?' I laughed excitedly after landing down on the ground, & turned around to see if anyone was there. Jumping over a school back fence, missing classes, those were absolutley no-no for me. It was only one time that I was a little late to first period, but grandmother hit my shin with long stick continuosly, while hitting me harder when I said I didn't do it on purpose. Well, that was the start of my first obsession, & trauma; to never, ever do anything in the wrong way, & to never trick anyone, but now it feels like, I'm breaking the chains with my bare hand. How nice...
I faltered for a second; 'Ah, this is really wrong... but this time, I'll live as I want. I'll do anything I want to do, & say anything I want to say.' My hands clenched before my chest, as I looked up once more, & picked up the wallet I had thrown down at the ground.
So, I walked ahead bravely, following the path that led to a street.
Looking back then, it was the most ridiculous thing I thought of doing. How can I wonder around when I didn't know anything about this western country without even thinking that I could get lost? With no phone, but money... I had somewhat forgotten that I was a thirteen year old brat at the moment, not some college student.
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