บท 63: Battle of Wills
〚Failure - Synchronisation 25%〛
Somewhere in my consciousness I felt something break and the arm plunged down, but unlike before it was slow. Instead of stabbing me it veered off course, scraping the shell of the wasps back before lodging itself into the tunnel wall. It had succeeded, but I ultimately failed.
"Why isn't this working?"
I was worried. I had properly controlled the wasp before, what did I do then that I wasn't doing now?
Should I have injured it more to suppress the will it had left?
But if I did, its body would become useless.
«You need to calm down.» Sensei chastised in an amused voice. «A head muddled with emotions can never seize control of a foreign mind.»
I wanted to say something mean to him but the wasp was moving once more, this time both of its arms were poised to attack as they hovered over my head. The only reason I wasn't a skewered snake kebab was because I was holding them back with what limited control I had.
And he expected me to be calm in such a situation.
I thought back to every deep breathing, tai chi, yoga, relaxation technique I ever heard about and put to practice all their teachings. Clearing my head of all thoughts and breathing deeply to fill my snake lungs.
Soon enough, my thoughts and worries were pushed to the side, becoming much more faint. My furiously beating heart relaxed and the fear was replaced by a familiar chill.
I began to hear my own steady heartbeat and the blood rushing through my body. And most spectacularly, I could hear that of the wasp's. Its heart beat was loud and erratic, irregular and so much more chaotic compared to my slow one that it was somewhat scary.
I reasoned this must be the effect of its injuries and my poison, so I actively projected my own will over it and soon its harshly beating heart began to slow down.
〚Failure - Synchronisation 65% 〛
The trembling arms that hovered over my head had stopped shaking but they did not move to attack either.
〚Failure - Synchronisation 70%〛
Unworried, I continued to try. This time hoping to make the wasps arm move. I pictured its arm opening and extending and a single barbed claw twitched. I focused on it and exerted more pressure and soon, it slowly began to open.
〚Success - Synchronisation 75%〛
I did a little victory dance in my mind as I watched the system's display. My synchronisation was so high! Directing it like a puppet was no longer a mere idea if it was already happening!
But before I could cheer, my coloured vision faded to black and even my sight through heat sense disappeared like my skill had been shut off. Startled, I blinked around at the sudden blindness looking for any glimmer of light, confused and half tempted to let go of the wasps body.
What was happening now?
But suddenly, there was a harsh flicker of light like a dying bulb in a dark room and I was introduced to sight once more.
However, this new vision was blurry. Its plane of view broke up among many hexagonal cells, with a wide aerial vision like I was looking down from somewhere up high. I began to see things from a different angle, through many eyes that formed a collective view, and sensations from a body that was arguably not my own.
Before I could feel shock, I saw the rubble tunnel walls reflected back at me and recognised where I was. It was still the same tunnel only I was seeing through the wasp's eyes like it and I had become one.
It was still the same ash coloured dusty wall but now it was lit up and shone with a fluorescent blue tinge that was nothing like before. It reminded me of the glow of chemicals under ultraviolet light, cold colours with hues more intense and bright than my snake vision had ever been.
And the kicker?
When I looked to see myself from the wasps eyes, I didn't find any trace of my original body. It was like I had disappeared. Or rather, the eyes of my puppet subconsciously avoided me, leaving an eerie empty space where my body should be.
It was a rather disturbing sight that chilled me for a few seconds. But, before I could process the supposed illusion, the suffocating terror and anxiety of the wasp under my control quickly seeped through my own awareness, dulling my senses and filling me with urges that were not my own.
I was overcome by a rush of euphoria followed by a maddening feeling of dread. Intense pain assaulted my mind and I recoiled with horror when I saw I was bleeding out from everywhere.
My purple blood was painted across the tunnel floor like a crime scene and I felt like I was slowly being driven to madness.
Sharp pangs arose from the depths of my carapace and my mandibles now salivated with a hunger so intense I began to search around for anything I could sate my hunger with.
Distracted by the foreign sensation, my awareness was plunged into a dream-like state where glimpses of memories flashed across my eyes, all the while a twisty knotty feeling kept gnawing under my carapace.
I was now a young larvae having its first taste of flesh, a freshly hatched young wasp, then I was in a chamber meeting an enormous wasp I could only describe as sinister, whom I automatically acknowledged as 'Queen'.
I bowed low, filled with dread, not daring to look directly at her, the surrounding drones or the ghastly pool of blood at her feet.
A sharp stab of pain cleared my mind and I suddenly realized that these memories were not mine.
The only thing keeping me sane was the throbbing sensation of something in my thorax. A mist settled there like a cloud, blazing a fiery red and vibrating at speeds that caused everything around it to hurt, as if trying to burst out.
There was the feeling of loyalty, helplessness and deep regret in these memories unlike anything I'd ever experienced since my rebirth, and at that moment I heard Sensei's frantic voice calling out to me.
I couldn't make out his words but his voice felt like an anchor in the vast ocean not allowing me to drown.
Realising what was happening, I snapped out of the memory before it was too late and I quickly followed the chain of memories up to the surface where to my surprise, I appeared in my human form.
My mind was much clearer in that moment and I was able to notice the wasp's memories invading my consciousness before I was swallowed whole.
I quickly began my counter attack on the wasp's consciousness. It was a mental battlefield to see who could devour the other first. Remembering the weightless sensation and intense loyalty I felt as a newborn wasp, I grew instantly repulsed.
So, I unleashed the combined memories of two lifetimes on the wasp, proceeding to suppress all of its attacks with a flood of memories of my own.
Before long everything became quiet, its consciousness now a tranquil sea with only one voice.
Mine.
Outside of the mental arena, the wasps' limbs dropped to the floor, its eyes dull as I heard a ding.
〚Success - Synchronisation 100%. Assimilation Complete〛
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