บท 98: Side Story: Another Idiot from another Universe
This was something that happened a while ago, even way before Akane went to UA high.
It was the story about an idiot that thought that just because you reincarnated into another world, that you knew about, because you saw it in a piece of media, that you automatically have the right to disrupt all order in there. Simply because they weren't real in his eyes.
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Lucas was a big anime and game enthusiast, like seriously. He was a man of culture, but lately one kind of genre captured him intensely.
That was the isekai. The idea of transmigrating or reincarnating into another world with a cheat ability already filled him with excitement. Nowadays especially these FanFictions were the main character was so overpowered caught his eyes lately.
He wanted to be just like them, that obsession was, in his words, 'beyond any of you mortals understanding', that especially showed in the moment where he lacks the fear of jumping in front of a truck to 'save' a little girl.
Well, the situation was created, because he threw the girls ball in front of the truck and she followed it. Needlessly to say he needed to do this 16 times to finally work, because all the previous girl put their parents teaching to heart to not follow their toy to the street, but oh well.
After 16 tries he finally got the opportunity to push the girl out of the way of the truck. It was about time he gets his change of reincarnation.
He found himself in a white space, devoid of anything. He looked around for a moment, before he started to notice that his body is gone...
...YES! His ugly obese, fat 196-kilogram body is gone. The body that just was ugly, had short and sight and was always riddles with acne! It was finally gone, and Lucas felt happy.
This was already a good decision.
Until he had to wait for what felt like an eternity. He was alone in this space and started floating around in it, trying to find any clues of another presence, but it failed.
He floated around for a while, but after some time of floating he started to doubt things, he started to doubt if he indeed was moving from his position or was in truth staying at the same position as the beginning, he started to worry very much until a person fell right in front of him.
What he saw in front of his was the most beautiful and elegant person he has ever seen. He wasn't sure if the person in front of him was male or female, they just had a certain gender-neutral beauty to them.
Their hair was long and luscious, seemingly glittering from nothing. Their eyes were mesmerizing and just had that deepness in them where he just could lose himself in, their lips were full and rosy, but it wasn't like some pair of really puffy lips, they were rather thin, but they just had an aura of elegance to them, despite just being lips and lasty their nose. He couldn't describe it, but it was also just beautiful.
Lucas had the feeling that in front of him was a masterful sculpted statue where the creator put his very being in even shaping the pores of the statue. So beautiful was the sight in front of him.
"DAMN, I barely have any time left! I have an important meeting with my senpais in about 13 minutes. Goodness gracious, I can't let them wait for too long.
This image of Lucas to the god shattered the very minute he opened his mouth? Upper brass, he hadn't enough time? Lucas thought that all gods were either relaxed or easygoing or total complete dickholes, but he never heard of the god that was hard-pressed on time.
Weren't they supposed to have a relaxing time, because, you know, they were immortal beings that give people another changes of life?
"Damn, damn, damn! I am just a newbie here at work and they gave me so many individual cases to reincarnate? My damn evaluation is in a damn 12 minutes, these assholes from the upper brass, didn't they have to do the same stuff I did once? If yes, why don't they understand that we newbies are being put under such heavy pressure just to hold our quota, dammit! How long is this soul already here? For about seven minutes, good, so I didn't make them wait for too long."
As Lucas heard that he had to choke for a second, because the god said that he was only here for about seven minutes, he could have sworn that it felt like an eternity.
"Excuse me, but seven minutes? What do you mean with that?"
"Exactly what I said, seven minutes."
Lucas was getting impatient as the person in front of him didn't understood his implications.
"Yeah, I know you said seven minutes, but I mean what kind of minutes. Earth minutes, Mars minutes, another world time system?"
The person in front of him just had the most stupefied expression imaginable. It was as if he saw a person shit on his dinner table, while dancing the macarena with a flowerpot on his head with just green liquid coming from that persons mouth, that all while he just came home and opened the living room door.
The person had that expression on his face.
"Are you mentally challenged or anything? Seven minutes are what you understand in seven minutes. Yes, your damn earthen minutes if you want to say it like that. Now don't ask stupid questions and just fill these forms out, I still have two people to attend to and you look to me like someone who already knows how these things work."
With that expression doG (God spelled backwards), disappeared from the place, leaving Lukas alone.
He looked at the form and already felt thrilled.
"Huehuehuehue, I don't know if this is a mistake or not, but I certainly am not displeased with this."
The form in his hand was an overpowered-fantasy-hentai-protagonist-CYAO. Lucas felt thrilled as he opened it, he couldn't let this change go to waste.
He looked at the form and saw all kinds of nice and useful abilities and advantages on it.
They were sorted in advantages, talents, skills, and abilities. Lucas just picked the most useful sounding things before confirming his choices and getting reincarnated into another world.
Honestly, he just felt happy and satisfied with his choices he might have gunned for it, but never would he have guessed that he got a lucky opportunity like this.
Only too bad that he ignored the fact that he had a top limit in how much Karma points he could spend on. He picked options that where far from what he could afford to choose.
His spending was 1.000.000/100.
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Lol, poor doG:
doG was currently slamming his head on the ground in a dogeza as he had to apologize to his two senpais for messing up.
"I am sorry, I am sorry, please forgive me, I am new and inexperienced here. I hope you can forgive me for doing such a mistake!"
doG was currently apologizing for the fact that he swapped the wrong CYOA form with each other, creating a rather important disturbance.
"Sigh, whatever. Go reflect in the reflection chamber in the sealing designation space, we two will deal with it."
doG was still crying his eyes out as he heard that, he clung to his senpais thighs and thanked them for getting him out of this trouble.
"Remember to never make such a mistake again, you don't know, but some of these souls are very greedy, biting more up than they can chew, sometimes this can escalate very quickly before you know it. Some of these troubles even need a sealing designation, but these things are very last case scenario, so if you ever find yourself issuing one of these, you know you messed up, understood?"
doG nodded. His carrier would be fucked if that happened. He bowed once again to his senpai, before disappearing to reflect on his mistakes.
Fate sighed.
"Destiny, why did I have to get such a troublesome kohai?"
"Yeah, but he is still a bit cute though. What do you want to do with that person though? You know, the one that got the wrong CYAO."
"Don't worry, that idiot managed to get reincarnated into the wrong place. He'll get eliminated before he knows."
Fate and Destiny smiled, oh yes. That idiot is about to get dusted.
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HopelessHikikomori
HopelessHikikomori ...what do you think about this parody?
Does this hit all necessary stereotypes?
Lol, even if not, as long as it feels like a scuffed self-insert I am satisfied with the results.
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