บท 112: What should I do?
I was hoping wozards would not notice me, but being held by train conductor, made my hopes crumble.
It was strange, I just looked into her eyes, and she noticed me. Well, mistakes were made and I am currently standing outside the entrance to the station. I shouldn't have tried to enter the train.
Why do I remember what happened? Well, they forgot to erase my memories the second they let their hands off me.
So, without second thought I just walked back through the entrance and realized that I was late.
The moment I walked through, train began preparing to set off. As I saw it, I ran as fast as I could to the train, hoping to grab onto something...
~ third person time ~
As Anton ran towards the train, he slipped and fell headfirst onto the ground. Surprisingly, or not really surprisingly, he immediately stood up and tried again.
And he failed. Just a centimeter away from last train's door handle.
Yep, he didn't make it. But he he didn't cry or got angry. He just facepalmed and jumped onto the tracks. After doing so, he said " Well, let's hope this body of mine can do it."
As he said that, he stretched in anyway he could and ran onto the rail tracks. Towards the Hogwarts, as this station only lead to one place, and it was the only way for him to reach the beautiful place of magic and horrible accidents.
Why accidents? Because you can't really fault anyone for all the trash that was going on in the school. It was just bad organization and overestimation of teacher's powers.
Who in their right mind wouldn't make any attempts at making school safer after two years of horrible "accidents".
Actually, magic world is not that safe of a place, so most likely wizards wouldn't mind that much.
Why would they even mind, their child learned in the best school and it must be intentional. Right? Right?? They need to learn the dangers of the world after all. And nobody died, so why should they worry?
As question in Anton's mind were explaining themselves, he just ran and ran and ran towards his future.
Making couple of stops along the way to eat and rest, he continued to run better and better every single day.
After couple of days, as he ran out of food, he wondered how long he would need to run. He was happy at his capabilities, but was bored as he couldn't entertain himself in his mind anymore.
Yes, he was bored.
And only thing keeping him from stopping, was his incredibly fast growing body. Fast not in the way of age or height, but speed and control.
At first, he stumbled sometimes, but now he could run while evading birds tryin to just fly through him. As he was not really that noticable.
Yep, he was currently running on the section high in the sky between the mountains. View was good, but bird poop was an annoyance. Slippery and always present.
As days passed, he finally arrived at the train station.
Train made it in hours, but most likely it was extremely fast, as it was magical. As for Anton, it took him days to reach his destination.
And first thing he did - he ran towards the village and borrowed some food. Why food? Because he wanted to taste something good. He liked eating. Even though he didn't feel hungry or thirsty.
Arriving at the village, he searched for the bar and sneaked in. Why bar? Because it was open in the night.
~ first person time ~
After that I carefully began searching for anything resembling wand Maker or something like that. There were no such thing in here. Only thing I was happy about, was the magical teleport using powder and a name.
Understanding that magic was not practical without a wand, I whooshed to the diagonal valley...
And went straight for the wand Maker shop. Without being noticed, obviously. Who would be in there except for olivander deep in there, making wands. School already started, and not everyone broke their wands in their lifetime. Barely anyone, to be honest.
Taking the first wand, whooshing and waving it, nothing disasterous happened. Only some shelves opened.
Continuing towards other wands, I tried most of them, bringing havoc to desperate Olivander, who tried to "revelio" and other spells to find out the reason for chaos that was happening around him.
I didn't let him touch me, and definitely didn't look at his eyes. I knew that it was dangerous, but didn't care. Magic is too interesting. Especially it might help in recovery of my memories.
Sadly enough, I had to go through most of his wands, and the only one that had the reaction of shining light at the end, was scrawny looking, thin and short 10 cm long flexible wand. If you could call it a wand. It was more like a polished twig that didn't want to be straight, but for some reason it was straight. The scrawny part was it's ridges and uneven width.
Must be some kind of old-style or toy wand. Otherwise, how could you explain it.
Placing 7 golden things on the table, I left the shop. Where did I take them? Don't bother. I just borrowed them from someone passing by and a little bit from the bar...
After that I borrowed some clothes from random shop and went on a borrowing spree. Why wouldn't I? It was an exciting place.
Returning to the Hogsmead I decided to stop borrowing that much, as I felt guilty and returned most things to their rightful owners. Except for clothes, money, wand and food.
As excitement passed, I really regretted borrowing all the time, but it is inevitable. Considering my situation, I calmed down and began thinking. For the first time in days.
I needed at least crude plan of actions. Especially in this dangerous place. Wizards are not nice people, they are really conservative and could easily be angered, if you take movies and what I've seen into account. At least some of them are easily angered. And with magic at hand, it is not safe.
So, to not be touched or look into the eyes accidentally, I decided to visit clothes shop again and borrowed all the things necessary to cover my body at all times.
Gloves, long sleeved shirt, long socks, scissors, bag from nice fabric or leather of some kind unknown to me, many other things and most importantly I've got darkened glasses. Some kind of magic glasses, but it is not what important to me.
Making holes in the bag, I wore it as balaclava, completely covering every part of skin and hair. As for the eyes, glasses were peeking from below the bag.
Yes, it was ridiculous. But it was the only way for fast and safe gear up.
Making sure that nothing is visible, I tucked shirt into trousers and wore a belt to not let wind blow my clothes off and make me vulnerable.
Yes, I'm not leaving it to the chance no matter how ridiculous I look. Even though I could get better looking clothes from human world, but I might be unable to get back in here after that, and it is not what I wanted.
Checking on random wizards that they don't see me upon touching or holding them, I proceeded to test eye contact. And it mostly worked. They would feel something, but wouldn't notice me, as they always began looking around and breaking eye contact.
~ third person time ~
Getting dressed, our ridiculously looking Anton walked to the train station and proceeded to move further towards the main Hogwarts castle.
Obviously, he didn't know what exactly he wanted to do in there, except for sneaking into classes to learn magic and watch Harry play his role in the most ridiculous contest known to him.
Oh, obviously he wouldn't butt in. He was not some kind of super strong mc, he just had a strange body that grew more and more with time.
Yep, he still grew, but he didn't notice it yet, as it was not obvious. Except maybe for the endurance and running speed. These things he noticed and was happy about. He felt good.
Looking around while walking, he didn't notice how he arrived at the Hogwarts main entrance.
And now he had to climb over the wall or find other entrance. Main gates happened to be too heavy or closed for Anton.
Walking around the castle, he tried to open every door, window and gate. Obviously, people would begin to walk in and out, when classes start, so Anton searched for anything resembling glass building, where they would play with shouting grass, or something like that.
Sitting on the cold grass, waiting for young wizards to walk out from the warm castle, he began looking into his own reflection. He saw how dumb he looked, so he took off his "hat" and looked at his face.
Surprisingly enough, he resembled a normal human, and felt like he saw his face somewhere long ago. He felt extremely nostalgic and sad.
He couldn't remember faces or voices of his parents, brother or friends. It was so long ago, that he couldn't stop being melancholic and apologetic that he fell into trance-like state.
Getting lost in his thoughts, he didn't notice how big dog approached him and began licking his face, while drooling all over his clothes.
As sensation of drool slipping down his chest rapidly awakened Anton, he noticed as huge dog was standing too close for comfort. As Anton jumped up to look around, he noticed a certain enormous bearded man was looking at him and his clothes.
" Why are you wearing these clothes? Where is yarr uniform, kiddo? " Said the man with his booming, deep but soft voice.
______________
1652/1952 words in a chapter.
Thank you for reading, and enjoy if you can!
I will try to write as I can. No promises of timings or schedules as of yet.
Also, I'm fucked. I have credits for over 5k$ and no freaking income.
I'm sooo fucked.
I am thinking about proclaiming bankruptcy...
And that's all of sadge news, now for other news.
I hope people are not too upset with such a downgrade, but life happens and in it nothing ever happens for forever. Except for death obviously.
And I don't really want to care if you are upset, so Fck you in advance. I don't want to feel bad. And feeling bad makes me nervous. I'm at my worst in years, considering my money situation.
~ next part is about my head problems and a recommendation ~
I don't recommend reading it if you are absolutely fine, but won't stop you.
Psychologically though, idk. I shouldn't really care about how I feel. It makes everything worse.
For people who want to know more about psychology, depression and such - depression makes itself stronger, the more you know about it. The more you care about it. The more you think about it. It makes you blame it, for not doing something. At least in my case. Most likely, it is not absolutely the same for others, but I feel a need to tell people - the way out of depression is to forget what it is. Depression is not the reason - it is excuse or a symptom.
It it is symptom - check at doctor, if it is excuse - survive as long as you can and hold on. Someday you might stop using it. I can only wish you luck and to have faith in the future. No matter how bleak it is now.
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