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57.14% Gintama Reader's Eccentric Enunciating of Desires / Chapter 4: Every Boy's Cherry Has to Pop Someday

บท 4: Every Boy's Cherry Has to Pop Someday

||| Still in the Shimura Dojo |||

"Hoho, so you've come...", Gintoki mumbles to the wind

"Well, I can't exactly beat you up without getting here", Kouji says while slowly walking towards Gintoki

Gintoki gets into a stance while holding a shinai (bamboo sword) to his side with his right hand, "Even knowing that I use the Hiten Mitsurugi-ryū, you'll still dare challenge me?"

"Fool! I have already mastered the use of Kenbunshoku and Busoshoku Haki! your sword will falter against mine!", Kouji rebuts whilst also holding a shinai but with his left hand

A strange silence overtook the dojo with only the whistling of the wind and the rustling of the leaves reaching their ears

The two meet eye-to-eye, their grips on their swords tightening

A singular leaf finds its way inside the dojo and passes through their field of vision

It flutters around as guided by the wind until it reached the floor

And at that instant-

The two shinais meet each other at the tip and at the next second,

They broke!

Splinters of wood burst from the meeting point and start to scatter around like cherry blossoms

The combatants stop to take a glimpse at each other...

And then, Kouji takes a quick leap backwards!

Gintoki, who expected Kouji to dash forward was taken aback by his retreat and his eyes widened at the next series of events

Kouji puts his hands behind his back and then one by one, he picked up the spare shinais from the spares container and threw horizontally at a high speed, towards Gintoki!

Gintoki hurriedly bends his body in a comical fashion to dodge the first, second, third and so on barrage of shinais while horrifyingly shouting, "OI KOUJI! STOP!"

"AHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! AND SO I PRAY! UNLIMITED BLADE WORKS!!!", Kouji turned maniacal

The entrance to the dojo slowly opens and in comes Shinpachi

"Gin-san, Kouji-san, could you please not ruin the dojo?", Shinpachi requests in a blunt way

Kouji stops his maniacal streak then raises an eyebrow on Shinpachi's direction, "Didn't you say that you don't care what happens to this dojo? That it has never brought anything good? Then at least, let us puts this so called pointless dojo to use"

Gintoki caught on to Kouji's words, "He's right! It's not like anyone else is coming here to use these equipment right? And thank god that abnormal species of gorilla is not here to rule us with an iron fist!"

"Prepare yourself, Gintoki!", Koujin passes another shinai to Gintoki's direction while holding another in his hand

"Just as I like it! Eat dirt, Kouji!", Gintoki catches the shinai and they dash directly to each other

Shinpachi felt an ache in his heart, "You two, please stop!"

They pause right before contact, causing the wind to unnaturally converge between them

Gintoki and Kouji stare at each other and then to Shinpachi as they had the same eyebrow raised expression and remarked at the same time, " Haa!!?!?!?!"

Shinpachi shook a little from their remark and takes a deep breath as he looks around the dojo

Splinters of wood from the clashes of shinai

Floorboards dented by the two's rapid movements

Their kendogi doused in sweat

and the most out of place, some shinai sticking out on the wall from when Kouji threw them

The dojo is, a mess

And so was he right now. He's a mess.

"I... hate this... this dojo...

"I hate this dojo as it is right now

"I... want my sis back..."

"Please come back..."

Shinpachi drops on his knees as he starts bawling his eyes out

Kouji approaches him and taps his shoulder

"It's not 'Please come back', what're you a sissy?", Kouji says with a mocking expression

Gintoki also went to them and says, "That guy's no sissy... he's a siscon"

Kouji shakes his head as if in disappointment, "The current generation truly is useless in romance, so much so that they'd latch on to actual relatives because no other woman will go near them"

"Well, what else can you expect? Cherry boy here has three zeroes! Zero life, Zero love, and Zero money", the trolls look at each other and start shrugging their shoulders at the same time

Shinpachi's body starts trembling from embarrassment turned anger as he shouts at them, "YOU GUYS THINK YOU'RE SO MUCH BETTER THAN ME!!! FINE THEN! CHALLENGE ACCEPTED! I'LL SMASH YOUR HEADS TOGETHER, YOU CURSED TROLLS!!!"

Gintoki and Kouji once again look at each other for the nth time this day and grab each of Shinpachi's shoulders to give them a squeeze

"That's the kind of face you should have!", Kouji says with a gentle smile on his face

"You may lose this dojo or someone may try to steal your sister, but what's important is to never lose your soul. That is what keeps you going so that no matter what trouble may come, you'll be able to come standing right back up", Gintoki lectures Shinpachi

"You guys...", mutters Shinpachi as his eyes get teary once again

This time Kouji gets irritated, "Oi crybaby! A man's tears shouldn't be shed so easily! Let's move on before what we arrive in turns out to be over Shinpachi's age limit"

"We should hurry or we might see the Gorilla Sister doing XXX with green-skinned Amantos while wearing only XXX with XXXXX on XXXX", Gintoki says with a serious face

Shinpachi blushes while retorting, "Just what kind of play are you imagining my sister to be in!"

"Heh, siscon", The duo of trolls say together as they start walking out the dojo

Shinpachi's shame levels increase at the same time as his temperature as his blush deepens but he releases all of it with one big sigh as he follows them but not before turning back once more and whispering, "Please guide me, father"

||| At the Loan Shark's Illegal Flying High-leg Nightclub |||

The Loan Shark man is trying to pick out the best outfit for Otae

"Hmm... This one might be good, but the other one too...", he thinks outloud

Otae just stares at the array of clothing when suddenly the man picks out one of them

"I've finally found the one! This one not only allows a good view for a high-leg but can also help complement one's waist! What's more is that it can fit a good pair of bre- oh, there's nothing", the man's excitement slowly dies down as his head gets one hand gripped by Otae

"What do you mean there's nothing?", She says with an innocent smile but it can't hide the twitching nerve on her forehead

"Urghh, let go of me!"

Otae suddenly remembers her current situation and lets go of the man

"Tsk, so violent! You better not treat your customers like this!", he warns while his hand makes a show of nearing his gun holster

Otae freezes for a bit and the man just laughs it off

"Well, change of plans. Try this one!" He picks another outfit that's more fitting for those... not so well-endowed

Before he even gets near Otae, the wall in room gets broken in!

Smoke comes out from the collision

The man's guards rush in from the door and started pointing their gun on the source of the smoke

From the smoke then comes three figures

"*cough* *cough* Why'd you have to make such an abrupt landing?", Shinpachi complains

"Hai, it can't be helped, can it? After my imagination went wild, I just thought that I should hurry or the author's gonna have to write some nasty things and this novels viewer rating will go up", Gintoki elaborates

"Well, who cares? Anyway, hello everyone!", Kouji makes a grab for Shinpachi

He then shouts out, "My cherry boy here wants it popped by the most violent gorilla woman here! How about it? Just one shot, man"

And the world stays still just from the words of this man's mouth


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LifeLessCorpse LifeLessCorpse

I'm tired...

Well then, I think it's about time I slept

Arrivederci!

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