34รีวิว
4.64
- คุณภาพงานเขียน
- ความเสถียรของการอัปเดต
- การดำเนินเรื่อง
- กาสร้างตัวละคร
- พื้นหลังโลก
แบ่งปันความคิดของคุณกับผู้อื่น
เขียนรีวิว
Finally! PLS UPDATE MOREEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Very nice to read.😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊
It's alright. Not a huge fan of the MC..................................................................................................................
I haven’t read this story yet so I may delete this or change the rating but the reason I’m giving it this rating is simply because I enjoyed the authors one piece story and I am sad to see he stopped writing it for this story. I actually have no problem with him writing this story too, I just don’t like abrupt stops. I would like to know if it’s on hiatus, if it’s dropped or if we can expect some chapters in the near future. Unfortunately it’s already been over a month for the one piece world and 5 days for this story.
Muito bom 😁😁😀☺👍👍☺😀😁😀😀👍👍😀😁😁😁😀😁😀☺☺👍😁😀☺☺😀😁😁👍👍😁😀☺!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Good 👍 great👍 amazing👍 incredible 👍 Good 👍 great👍 amazing👍 incredible 👍 Good 👍 great👍 amazing👍 incredible 👍 Good 👍 great👍 amazing👍 incredible
Honestly it was a huge disappointment. For the first few chapters it was average then went downhill so fast. I just skimmed the rest because of how boring it was, and in team part the author introduced a useless teammate honestly I would prefer if he just go solo or become anbu.
O que? Eu simplesmente não gostei. O protagonista é filho de uma uchiha Alto-Jounnin que despertou o mangekyou e ficou quase cega, morreu no nascimento do prota mas ainda assim conseguiu selar seus olhos sharingan no prota, filho do sensei de ninguém mais ninguém menos que SHISUI e ainda assim é ignorado pelo hokage e pior ainda pelo Fugaku, maldito lider do clã Uchiha. Haha, que piada mais HORRÍVEL, SEM GRAÇA, NOJENTA! Aaah que repugnância eu sinto! Outra coisa que detestei foi como você justificará sua falta de ação sobre o massacre Uchiha. Você fez o protagonista ser visto como mau presságio pelo clã uchiha somente por ter perdido seus dois pais e supostamente ter sido o culpado, meu Deus do céu! Ok, eu preciso me acalmar... NÃO DÁ! ... Eu, também não gostei dele indo à casa de Fugaku para adquirir o uniforme Uchiha... porquê? Porquê ele aparentemente foi em uma má hora, desde que Fugaku se irritou com sua presença... irmão, já era tarde, fazia mal o protagonista esperar um pouco para ir conhecer Fugaku em seu escritório? Ele estava jantando com a família quando foi interrompido!
Good Work Good Work Good Work Good Work Good Work Good Work Good Work Good Work Good Work Good Work Good Work Good Work Good Work Good Work Good Work Good Work Good Work Good Work
Good novel. Nice idea, good novel. Keep up the good work and thanks. Nice idea, good novel. Keep up the good work and thanks. Nice idea, good novel. Keep up the good work and thanks. Nice idea, good novel. Keep up the good work and thanks. Nice idea, good novel. Keep up the good work and thanks.
😄😃😀😊☺😉😍😘😚😗😙😜😛😳😁😔😌😒😞😣😢😂😭😪😰😅😓😩😫😨😱😡😤😖😆😋😎😷😴😵😲😟😦😧😮😬😐😕😯😶😇😏😑👲👳👮👷💂👶👦👧👨👩👴👵👱🎅👸👼😈👿😺😸😻😽😼🙀😿😹😾👹👺🙈🙉🙊💀👽💩🔥🌟✨💫💥💢💦💧💤💨👂👀👃👅👄💋👍👎👌👊✊✌✋☝👆👇👉👈👐👋👏💪💃👫👪👬👭💏💑👯💁💆💇🙋🙎🙇🙍🙌🙏🙆🙅💅🎩👑👒👟👞👡👠👢💼👘👙👖🎽👗👚👔👕👜👝👛👓🎀🌂💄💛💙💞💖💕💓💗💔❤💚💜💘💌💍💎👤👥💬💭👣
(●♡∀♡)(๑♡⌓♡๑)(｡♡‿♡｡)(✿ ♡‿♡)(•ө•)♡(｡･ω･｡)ﾉ♡( ◜‿◝ )♡(◍•ᴗ•◍)❤(♡ω♡ ) ~♪꒰⑅ᵕ༚ᵕ꒱˖♡♡˖꒰ᵕ༚ᵕ⑅꒱♡(ӦｖӦ｡)♥╣[-_-]╠♥♡(> ਊ <)♡(´∩｡• ᵕ •｡∩`) ෆ╹ .̮ ╹ෆ(灬º‿º灬)♡(｡・//ε//・｡)(〃ﾟ3ﾟ〃)(´ε｀ ) (ʃƪ＾3＾）(◕દ◕)(~￣³￣)~( ˘ ³˘)♥(*＾3＾)/～♡(●’3)♡(ε`●)(๑˙❥˙๑)(◍•ᴗ•◍)✧*。(*˘︶˘*).｡*♡( ˶ ❛ ꁞ ❛ ˶ )
Fanfic is awesome so far. Its detailed and shows necessary information about the MC and his everyday life. The author is quite good in spelling and has a good back ground for MC. Hope the updates are regular
👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍 👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍 👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍
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more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more
this is a slow novel, althought it is interesting ¡do not drop it! wwdwefwffwefewfewfefeewffewfewfefewfweffefewfeffasdafvervbebnerelivwrvwovneriveipvnevnrevrvnivivcnsdivnsewevwevwevewvwevewvwevwevewv
Very nice ᕙ( ͡◉ ͜ ʖ ͡◉)ᕗᕙ( ͡◉ ͜ ʖ ͡◉)ᕗᕙ( ͡◉ ͜ ʖ ͡◉)ᕗᕙ( ͡◉ ͜ ʖ ͡◉)ᕗᕙ( ͡◉ ͜ ʖ ͡◉)ᕗᕙ( ͡◉ ͜ ʖ ͡◉)ᕗᕙ( ͡◉ ͜ ʖ ͡◉)ᕗᕙ( ͡◉ ͜ ʖ ͡◉)ᕗᕙ( ͡◉ ͜ ʖ ͡◉)ᕗᕙ( ͡◉ ͜ ʖ ͡◉)ᕗᕙ( ͡◉ ͜ ʖ ͡◉)ᕗᕙ( ͡◉ ͜ ʖ ͡◉)ᕗᕙ( ͡◉ ͜ ʖ ͡◉)ᕗᕙ( ͡◉ ͜ ʖ ͡◉)ᕗᕙ( ͡◉ ͜ ʖ ͡◉)ᕗᕙ( ͡◉ ͜ ʖ ͡◉)ᕗᕙ( ͡◉ ͜ ʖ ͡◉)ᕗᕙ( ͡◉ ͜ ʖ ͡◉)ᕗᕙ( ͡◉ ͜ ʖ ͡◉)ᕗᕙ( ͡◉ ͜ ʖ ͡◉)ᕗ
เปิดเผยสปอยเลอร์
The Dao of -Ahem Sect Ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect Ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect Ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect Ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect Ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect Ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect Ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect Ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect Ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect Ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect Ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect Ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect
BECAUSE IT DESERVES IT🙌🙌🙌..BECAUSE IT DESERVES IT🙌🙌🙌..BECAUSE IT DESERVES IT🙌🙌🙌....BECAUSE IT DESERVES IT🙌🙌🙌...BECAUSE IT DESERVES IT🙌🙌🙌..BECAUSE IT DESERVES IT🙌🙌🙌
okay just a couple of things, Idk why everyone keeps wanting the dark route but I feel for this story it is much better for him to be grey.. ppl say oh theres not a lot of dark stories but honestly there are loads of both. I mean mainly I just dont want to see the mc hate every single fcking char or find some problem in everything. Will be annoying af to read. Another thing is his training, your making him focus on one thing at a time... why tf would he spend like 6 months trying to master rasengan then improve all his other sht ???? Nothing is ever perfect so why is he saying that there isnt much he can improve on ? It makes no fcking sense. what about sealing arts ? what about weapon training ? sword training ? staff training ? martial arts ? chakra control ? increasing his capacity ? speed ? control ? illusion arts ? plus many many other things... if not any of those why doesnt he try making moves ? like haki from one piece ? something from other animes he can try and incorporate into this ? try and create moves from fairy tail natsus fire magic etc, the control marco taught natsu ? he can try and incorporate that into his training with his fire nature. With the blood thing first of all its honestly boring and overused. Use some creativity ffs and not the same thing we see again and again. Honestly rinngan is quite sht. Dunno why everyone is obsessed with it. Gravity powers yes. But you can think of other ways to do something similar. summoning, get a contract. machine thing, dont need. The revive thing would be good but if your strong enough then you dont rly need it.. , the only good thing about the eye is the special skill. but that depends what it is... Also I dunno if your one of them ppl and this doesnt rlly matter for the story but its more of a personal opinion. Minato isnt the 'greatest genius' the only thing that is his is the rasenngan and frankly that jutsu is sht without flying thunder god. If you dont have that and the other guy is quicker your fcked.. most of if not everything else was someone elses work that he just improved. Yes thats amazing but then he had kushina who prob helped him with it all... if anything the uzumaki clan is the strongest and greatest there is. Going back to not making it himself, just imagine how long it would have taken for him to make it from scratch. He wouldnt have made it any where near the age of when he did and then no legend for him.. Ik might say I hate him but honestly I dont. It just annoys me when ppl over hype him and say hes the greatest etc.. to me he isnt the strongest or anywhere close. If you count all his skills then he probably is the best in assassination missions in certain circumstances. Good army killer against fodder but if the other side is prepared then it wouldnt work. I mean just put up earth wall then it would stop it in there tracks... id say the only reason it worked the first time so well is cause the other side didnt know about it. Sry for the long writing, just had to point out some things that are bugging me and what I feel can improve the story a ton. Not just yours either, loads of these fics lack creativity when they bring someone from our earth there.
Type your review here. Please write your review as detailed as you can. Your review would be very important to the story (at least 140 characters).
Awesome.. looking forward to what comes next... Thanks for writing this. Awesome.. looking forward to what comes next... Thanks for writing this. Awesome.. looking forward to what comes next... Thanks for writing this. Awesome.. looking forward to what comes next... Thanks for writing this.
more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more
So far it's been good reading keep going and please dont drop it with sitty excuses oooooooookooooooooooooioiooioooooooooioiioooooooooiiiiii
The Dao of -Ahem Sect Ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect Ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect Ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect Ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect Ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect Ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect Ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect Ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect Ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect Ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect Ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect Ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect
The Dao of -Ahem Sect Ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect Ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect Ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect Ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect Ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect Ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect Ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect Ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect Ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect Ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect Ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect Ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect
The Dao of -Ahem Sect Ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect Ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect Ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect Ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect Ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect Ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect Ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect Ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect Ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect Ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect Ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect Ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect
Great chapter! For your MC Mangekyou Sharingan ability I say have one eye be Obito's Kamui and his other eye be the ability can rewind time. I like another reviewer idea of having his Susanoo be a dragon Susanoo with the color black. If you give him the Kamui ability he won't have to leave the village, so when Itachi begins to kill the Clan he can just teleport himself into his pocket dimension and wait it out. I also think he should get close to Shisui for a chance for him to get his eye to get as his EMS. Then ambush Danzo to take the other eye before he has a chance to use Izanagi. Now onto his Rinnegan ability I think a really cool ability would be Time Skip like Hit from Dragon Ball Super. The ability to jump forward in time and attack your opponents while his other Rinnegan ability allows him to transform into a form of Ultra Instinct that Goku uses in Dragon Ball Super. Update soon!
Finally! PLS UPDATE MOREEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Very nice to read.😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊
It's alright. Not a huge fan of the MC..................................................................................................................
I haven’t read this story yet so I may delete this or change the rating but the reason I’m giving it this rating is simply because I enjoyed the authors one piece story and I am sad to see he stopped writing it for this story. I actually have no problem with him writing this story too, I just don’t like abrupt stops. I would like to know if it’s on hiatus, if it’s dropped or if we can expect some chapters in the near future. Unfortunately it’s already been over a month for the one piece world and 5 days for this story.
Muito bom 😁😁😀☺👍👍☺😀😁😀😀👍👍😀😁😁😁😀😁😀☺☺👍😁😀☺☺😀😁😁👍👍😁😀☺!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Good 👍 great👍 amazing👍 incredible 👍 Good 👍 great👍 amazing👍 incredible 👍 Good 👍 great👍 amazing👍 incredible 👍 Good 👍 great👍 amazing👍 incredible
Honestly it was a huge disappointment. For the first few chapters it was average then went downhill so fast. I just skimmed the rest because of how boring it was, and in team part the author introduced a useless teammate honestly I would prefer if he just go solo or become anbu.
O que? Eu simplesmente não gostei. O protagonista é filho de uma uchiha Alto-Jounnin que despertou o mangekyou e ficou quase cega, morreu no nascimento do prota mas ainda assim conseguiu selar seus olhos sharingan no prota, filho do sensei de ninguém mais ninguém menos que SHISUI e ainda assim é ignorado pelo hokage e pior ainda pelo Fugaku, maldito lider do clã Uchiha. Haha, que piada mais HORRÍVEL, SEM GRAÇA, NOJENTA! Aaah que repugnância eu sinto! Outra coisa que detestei foi como você justificará sua falta de ação sobre o massacre Uchiha. Você fez o protagonista ser visto como mau presságio pelo clã uchiha somente por ter perdido seus dois pais e supostamente ter sido o culpado, meu Deus do céu! Ok, eu preciso me acalmar... NÃO DÁ! ... Eu, também não gostei dele indo à casa de Fugaku para adquirir o uniforme Uchiha... porquê? Porquê ele aparentemente foi em uma má hora, desde que Fugaku se irritou com sua presença... irmão, já era tarde, fazia mal o protagonista esperar um pouco para ir conhecer Fugaku em seu escritório? Ele estava jantando com a família quando foi interrompido!
Good Work Good Work Good Work Good Work Good Work Good Work Good Work Good Work Good Work Good Work Good Work Good Work Good Work Good Work Good Work Good Work Good Work Good Work
Good novel. Nice idea, good novel. Keep up the good work and thanks. Nice idea, good novel. Keep up the good work and thanks. Nice idea, good novel. Keep up the good work and thanks. Nice idea, good novel. Keep up the good work and thanks. Nice idea, good novel. Keep up the good work and thanks.
😄😃😀😊☺😉😍😘😚😗😙😜😛😳😁😔😌😒😞😣😢😂😭😪😰😅😓😩😫😨😱😡😤😖😆😋😎😷😴😵😲😟😦😧😮😬😐😕😯😶😇😏😑👲👳👮👷💂👶👦👧👨👩👴👵👱🎅👸👼😈👿😺😸😻😽😼🙀😿😹😾👹👺🙈🙉🙊💀👽💩🔥🌟✨💫💥💢💦💧💤💨👂👀👃👅👄💋👍👎👌👊✊✌✋☝👆👇👉👈👐👋👏💪💃👫👪👬👭💏💑👯💁💆💇🙋🙎🙇🙍🙌🙏🙆🙅💅🎩👑👒👟👞👡👠👢💼👘👙👖🎽👗👚👔👕👜👝👛👓🎀🌂💄💛💙💞💖💕💓💗💔❤💚💜💘💌💍💎👤👥💬💭👣
(●♡∀♡)(๑♡⌓♡๑)(｡♡‿♡｡)(✿ ♡‿♡)(•ө•)♡(｡･ω･｡)ﾉ♡( ◜‿◝ )♡(◍•ᴗ•◍)❤(♡ω♡ ) ~♪꒰⑅ᵕ༚ᵕ꒱˖♡♡˖꒰ᵕ༚ᵕ⑅꒱♡(ӦｖӦ｡)♥╣[-_-]╠♥♡(> ਊ <)♡(´∩｡• ᵕ •｡∩`) ෆ╹ .̮ ╹ෆ(灬º‿º灬)♡(｡・//ε//・｡)(〃ﾟ3ﾟ〃)(´ε｀ ) (ʃƪ＾3＾）(◕દ◕)(~￣³￣)~( ˘ ³˘)♥(*＾3＾)/～♡(●’3)♡(ε`●)(๑˙❥˙๑)(◍•ᴗ•◍)✧*。(*˘︶˘*).｡*♡( ˶ ❛ ꁞ ❛ ˶ )
Fanfic is awesome so far. Its detailed and shows necessary information about the MC and his everyday life. The author is quite good in spelling and has a good back ground for MC. Hope the updates are regular
👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍 👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍 👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍
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more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more
this is a slow novel, althought it is interesting ¡do not drop it! wwdwefwffwefewfewfefeewffewfewfefewfweffefewfeffasdafvervbebnerelivwrvwovneriveipvnevnrevrvnivivcnsdivnsewevwevwevewvwevewvwevwevewv
Very nice ᕙ( ͡◉ ͜ ʖ ͡◉)ᕗᕙ( ͡◉ ͜ ʖ ͡◉)ᕗᕙ( ͡◉ ͜ ʖ ͡◉)ᕗᕙ( ͡◉ ͜ ʖ ͡◉)ᕗᕙ( ͡◉ ͜ ʖ ͡◉)ᕗᕙ( ͡◉ ͜ ʖ ͡◉)ᕗᕙ( ͡◉ ͜ ʖ ͡◉)ᕗᕙ( ͡◉ ͜ ʖ ͡◉)ᕗᕙ( ͡◉ ͜ ʖ ͡◉)ᕗᕙ( ͡◉ ͜ ʖ ͡◉)ᕗᕙ( ͡◉ ͜ ʖ ͡◉)ᕗᕙ( ͡◉ ͜ ʖ ͡◉)ᕗᕙ( ͡◉ ͜ ʖ ͡◉)ᕗᕙ( ͡◉ ͜ ʖ ͡◉)ᕗᕙ( ͡◉ ͜ ʖ ͡◉)ᕗᕙ( ͡◉ ͜ ʖ ͡◉)ᕗᕙ( ͡◉ ͜ ʖ ͡◉)ᕗᕙ( ͡◉ ͜ ʖ ͡◉)ᕗᕙ( ͡◉ ͜ ʖ ͡◉)ᕗᕙ( ͡◉ ͜ ʖ ͡◉)ᕗ
เปิดเผยสปอยเลอร์ The Dao of -Ahem Sect Ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect Ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect Ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect Ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect Ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect Ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect Ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect Ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect Ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect Ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect Ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect Ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect
BECAUSE IT DESERVES IT🙌🙌🙌..BECAUSE IT DESERVES IT🙌🙌🙌..BECAUSE IT DESERVES IT🙌🙌🙌....BECAUSE IT DESERVES IT🙌🙌🙌...BECAUSE IT DESERVES IT🙌🙌🙌..BECAUSE IT DESERVES IT🙌🙌🙌
okay just a couple of things, Idk why everyone keeps wanting the dark route but I feel for this story it is much better for him to be grey.. ppl say oh theres not a lot of dark stories but honestly there are loads of both. I mean mainly I just dont want to see the mc hate every single fcking char or find some problem in everything. Will be annoying af to read. Another thing is his training, your making him focus on one thing at a time... why tf would he spend like 6 months trying to master rasengan then improve all his other sht ???? Nothing is ever perfect so why is he saying that there isnt much he can improve on ? It makes no fcking sense. what about sealing arts ? what about weapon training ? sword training ? staff training ? martial arts ? chakra control ? increasing his capacity ? speed ? control ? illusion arts ? plus many many other things... if not any of those why doesnt he try making moves ? like haki from one piece ? something from other animes he can try and incorporate into this ? try and create moves from fairy tail natsus fire magic etc, the control marco taught natsu ? he can try and incorporate that into his training with his fire nature. With the blood thing first of all its honestly boring and overused. Use some creativity ffs and not the same thing we see again and again. Honestly rinngan is quite sht. Dunno why everyone is obsessed with it. Gravity powers yes. But you can think of other ways to do something similar. summoning, get a contract. machine thing, dont need. The revive thing would be good but if your strong enough then you dont rly need it.. , the only good thing about the eye is the special skill. but that depends what it is... Also I dunno if your one of them ppl and this doesnt rlly matter for the story but its more of a personal opinion. Minato isnt the 'greatest genius' the only thing that is his is the rasenngan and frankly that jutsu is sht without flying thunder god. If you dont have that and the other guy is quicker your fcked.. most of if not everything else was someone elses work that he just improved. Yes thats amazing but then he had kushina who prob helped him with it all... if anything the uzumaki clan is the strongest and greatest there is. Going back to not making it himself, just imagine how long it would have taken for him to make it from scratch. He wouldnt have made it any where near the age of when he did and then no legend for him.. Ik might say I hate him but honestly I dont. It just annoys me when ppl over hype him and say hes the greatest etc.. to me he isnt the strongest or anywhere close. If you count all his skills then he probably is the best in assassination missions in certain circumstances. Good army killer against fodder but if the other side is prepared then it wouldnt work. I mean just put up earth wall then it would stop it in there tracks... id say the only reason it worked the first time so well is cause the other side didnt know about it. Sry for the long writing, just had to point out some things that are bugging me and what I feel can improve the story a ton. Not just yours either, loads of these fics lack creativity when they bring someone from our earth there.
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Awesome.. looking forward to what comes next... Thanks for writing this. Awesome.. looking forward to what comes next... Thanks for writing this. Awesome.. looking forward to what comes next... Thanks for writing this. Awesome.. looking forward to what comes next... Thanks for writing this.
more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more
So far it's been good reading keep going and please dont drop it with sitty excuses oooooooookooooooooooooioiooioooooooooioiioooooooooiiiiii
The Dao of -Ahem Sect Ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect Ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect Ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect Ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect Ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect Ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect Ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect Ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect Ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect Ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect Ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect Ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect
The Dao of -Ahem Sect Ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect Ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect Ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect Ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect Ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect Ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect Ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect Ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect Ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect Ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect Ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect Ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect
The Dao of -Ahem Sect Ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect Ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect Ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect Ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect Ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect Ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect Ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect Ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect Ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect Ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect Ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect Ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect ahem sect
Great chapter! For your MC Mangekyou Sharingan ability I say have one eye be Obito's Kamui and his other eye be the ability can rewind time. I like another reviewer idea of having his Susanoo be a dragon Susanoo with the color black. If you give him the Kamui ability he won't have to leave the village, so when Itachi begins to kill the Clan he can just teleport himself into his pocket dimension and wait it out. I also think he should get close to Shisui for a chance for him to get his eye to get as his EMS. Then ambush Danzo to take the other eye before he has a chance to use Izanagi. Now onto his Rinnegan ability I think a really cool ability would be Time Skip like Hit from Dragon Ball Super. The ability to jump forward in time and attack your opponents while his other Rinnegan ability allows him to transform into a form of Ultra Instinct that Goku uses in Dragon Ball Super. Update soon!