บท 14: Revelation of a Decaying Rose
As if lost her soul, Shae dragged her lifeless body back to class from the teacher's office. She sits still on the chair quietly. Like a broken doll, she doesn't move, hear, or talk. Back straight like a pen, hands on her laps, elegant yet mindless. Dewy round eyes lack the usual bright glare, hollow like black holes leading the path to her deep sorrow and despair.
Shae's soul really did leave her body, it escapes the prison of affliction, permeates through the broken shell, and slowly rises above, looking back at Shae's mortal corpse. The world quiets down as Shae's spirit ascends. Even her worst fears bend down and stay clear of the passage. Her senses disconnect, break apart, and disperse into thin air.
From above, Shae observes the whole class room from a bird view: Teachers come in and go; Math equations on the blackboard get replaced by Physics; Classmates get up and sit down every period. And herself, isolated in spotlight, pinned down on a hard wooden chair, heavy chains lock down her neck that she can't breathe, her arms that she can't move, her waist that she can't bend, her legs that she can't stand. Sharp steel nails her hands right in the middle of her laps mercilessly.
Shae sees her past, from the initial naive curious girl, to an empty lifeless doll. From the happy free spirit in nature, to a tamed slave chained on a wooden chair. Young Shae tries to get up and break free, yet slapped down right back to the chair with heavier chains wrapped all around her. She tries to wave for help, soon enough, nails are hammered right through her palms all the way in her legs. Blood splashes, she yells and screams, only to be silenced by tighter chains on the neck. Rebel means punishments. Thicker beams get slammed in rougher should she ever resist. Only this time, blood floods, she submits and remains deadly silent.
Shae sees her future. Leaning against a chair secured by chains, so weak and fragile, on the verge of collapsing without those chains her holding up. No more nailed hands, rather ropes tying her wrists together. Clothes besmeared with blood, manifesting shades from carmine to scarlet. Like a withering rose, the outer petals have dried up like all the short-lived warmth she encountered. The lasting petals are barely attached to the stem anymore, even the mildest wind could shake them away. Right in the middle, baby petals are forming at an extremely slow pace. That's really the last of her. When the decaying outpaces the growing, it will be her time.
That is Shae's very first concept of leaving. Vague and un-contemplated, simply just the thought of freeing from the chains and agony. Why nailed to a chair, when she can flying away? Why choose to fight, when she only gets heartbreaks? Why wait till depleted to oblivion, when she can leave with dignity?
The idea of freedom transforms into a river of remedy, unexpected yet gentle, rushes into Shae's drained body. It runs and mends as deep cracks begin to close in and pain starts to subside. Like a spell, it continues to flow through different dimensions of time, connecting Shaes from the past and the future. On the left, there is the past Shae, a thread of light ignites in her dull lifeless eyes. So calm, peaceful, and forgiving that for the longest time, she didn't blink, desperately holding on to the heavenly warmth and hope.
Simultaneously, future Shae on the right senses the brightness. Head tilted to her feeble shoulder, eyes squeezed shut, she used up her remaining strength trying to open her eyes. Perhaps all the torture truly consumed the last of her, tired eyelids trembles slightly, but quickly gave up the powerless attempt. Shards of light peek through thick eye lashes, casting dark shadows on her pale cheek, sculpturing the final statue of the rose before it lapses. Weak pulse doesn't indicate if she stopped breathing, however almost unnoticeably, her lips quirked up slightly, she smiles serenely. A smile of relief and letting go.
Past, present, and future Shaes form a mysterious triangle affixed by spiritual links binding the three planes of reality. Like magnets attract and repel, three forces push and pull, reaching a delicate equilibrium. The warmth of relief and peace transcends from past and future to present through the temporal bond. Abruptly, life surges back into Shae's frail body, rejuvenating every blood cell. Strange yet intriguing, given the strength came from the thought of leaving the world. Compelled by a superpower force, mouth uncontrollably opens, lips move slightly...She bleats on repeat "take me...take me..."
Sadly Shae wasn't taken that day. How could she be? Her crusade to pain and suffering had barely begun. Even though the vision she had felt so real and close, in a way, it revived her, only to bring her back to life for more torture. Like a loop of misery, Shae fights, gets punished, gives up, resorts to peace, yet resurrected only to be shattered in pieces again.
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