บท 3: A Gentlemanly 'Confession'
"You realize that this changes everything, Merlin," Harris said.
"I suppose it does," Merlin agreed, with nowhere near the amount of concern Harris thought was warranted in his voice.
The fact that Harris couldn't follow Joshua for the next few weeks (or months or perhaps even years that were sometimes required in situations like this) without being noticed meant that none of Harris's usual methods would work this time. He would have to cultivate a relationship with Joshua somehow, become his friend and find out why he was so closed off by actually talking with him, and 'then' steer him into the path of the right person- once he found them- the old-fashioned way. It was probably the most daunting job Harris had ever come across. "Is this even supposed to happen?" he demanded, leaning closer to Merlin across his desk.
They were in Merlin's office, back at their headquarters. The place that Harris and his colleagues referred to as HQ was based behind a tailor's shop- the one where Harris had told Joshua he worked. In reality, it was just a place he passed through on the way to his real work- though he did buy all his suits from there.
They had a kind of symbiotic relationship with the Agapian tailors that Harris rarely examined too closely. The shop was a cover when a cover was needed, and sometimes those who worked there did the little things that unnoticeable people were less good at- like renting out living spaces or buying cars. In turn, cupids like Harris were some of their best customers; Harris himself had even been a regular of the shop back when it was first founded and he was still mortal. And no, the significance of the fact that he could remember his tailor but not the last person who had touched him did not escape Harris. It was something he tried not to think too much about.
Something else he didn't think much about was how it all worked. He didn't know why the men and women who worked in the shop were able to interact with his kind the way all other mortals couldn't, and he didn't think too much about where the money they paid them with came from either- or the money he used for anything, come to that. It certainly behaved like real money, but he had no idea what it did to the larger economy whenever it went into circulation. Like a lot of the rules of Harris's current existence, it seemed to just... be.
In the back of the shop there was an elevator that could take Harris and his colleagues more than underground- it took them to one of the worlds beyond the world of living, the one that straddled the line between it and the next. It was where people like Harris stayed until they were retired and moved on at last.
"Supposed to happen," Merlin repeated, breaking Harris out of that train of thought, "no, it isn't. But it isn't unprecedented either."
"This has happened before? To who?"
"No one you would know," Merlin told him, a little imperiously. "But it has happened before and it doesn't make your job impossible. Joshua Alcott 'is' going to fall in love, Harris. I can guarantee it." He held Harris's eyes for a moment. "You do you trust me, don't you?" he asked.
"Yes," Harris said reluctantly. "But 'you're' going to have to trust 'me.' If I say I need something done by one of the other branches, you get it done, none of the usual mind games."
Harris could only see romantic auras, only effect romantic potential, but there were different branches that controlled every kind of relationship. Not just the different kinds of love- but also hate and jealousy and fear and dislike and even the minute connections that formed between people who never even properly met at all. Sometimes, in order to do his job, Harris needed someone to give one of those other dynamics a nudge the way he could only to do with romantic attachments. In a life like Joshua's, that sort of thing was never easy but it was almost always necessary.
"Fair enough," Merlin agreed. "Just fill out these forms and take them to the Archive."
The forms were in triplicate, but it was still too easy. There was something else going on, Harris knew it. He felt, though, that he had pushed his luck on the subject of Joshua enough for the time being. He decided to fill out the forms and bide his time.
~oOo~
Because he had- obviously- not been expecting to meet Joshua, Harris had done nothing to build a background for himself that would make it conceivable for them to meet by accident a second time. Harris was clearly from a different class, he lived in a different part of town- Harris had a home outside headquarters for when he needed it, though he spent almost no time in it- and he therefore operated in completely different circles. He and Joshua were two people who had absolutely nothing in common and Harris was supposed to make it seem like it was somehow perfectly natural for them to just run into each other again one day soon.
It was a feat that Harris thought would be difficult for anyone- even someone with a lot more social experience than Harris himself happened to have. If his first meeting with Joshua had taught Harris anything, it was that he had forgotten how to really talk to people.
So he tried to think of himself as someone else- someone he was trying to bring into Joshua's circle as a potential match. How would he steer them together under those circumstances?
It was a foolish idea but a useful intellectual exercise, and it was how he came up with the idea for the first little tweak Merlin negotiated on his behalf.
Through a raffle that no one in Joshua's family was ultimately willing to admit to 'not' signing up for they ended up winning a substantial gift card to the kind of shop they normally couldn't afford to patronize but which none of them were willing to let go to waste. Harris didn't bother too much about the details- he didn't do much shopping himself, after all- but he had it on good authority that it would look perfectly reasonable for him to "happen" upon them there.
Technically, Harris ran into Joshua's little sister first- or, rather, Eliza ran into him, plowing into his legs face first and nearly falling over backwards as she did so. Harris caught and righted her. "Are you all right, little one?" he asked, crouching down in front of her.
"Not little," she protested, tossing her head.
"Is that right?" Harris murmured. He didn't have to look up from her little face to know that Joshua was getting closer. He might not have been able to see its color, but Joshua's grey aura certainly shone a little brighter as he zeroed in on his tiny sister's location.
"Sorry," Joshua said quickly, scooping her up. "She got away from me there." There was something defensive in Joshua's voice, as if he was entirely expecting to be accused of poor childcare in addition to being not the usual clientele of the store. When Harris looked up at him there was a proud yet rattled set to his chin that hardened but then fell away altogether when Joshua looked back down at him. "It's you," he said, blinking.
Still crouching on the floor, Harris said, "I'm not stalking you," which probably didn't help his case all that much.
To be fair, Harris wasn't thinking very clearly. For all he had prepared for it, a part of Harris still hadn't expected Joshua to have remembered him. That was another part of being unnoticeable; even if a person had a conversation with Harris, he didn't stick in their minds. He hadn't had anyone but one of his coworkers remember his face or his name in... well, in as long as he'd been what he was.
"Sure," Joshua snorted. He looked vaguely amused though; Harris supposed that was something. He eyed his sister seriously and said, "What've I told you about talking to strangers, Eliza girl?"
"Not a stranger if you know him," Eliza pointed out astutely.
Harris rose, saying, "She has you there."
"No, thank you, she don't, since we ain't exactly been properly introduced."
"Oh," came out of Harris's mouth. It was a half a question, half an uncertain statement to fill the sudden silence. He wasn't sure what Joshua was saying, what he actually expected.
Joshua shifted his grip on Eliza and reached out a hand. "I'm Joshua Alcott."
That was when Harris realized that Joshua had technically never told him his name. He hesitated only for a second before gripping the offered hand. "Harris Harper."
"Me too," Eliza said, and looked satisfied when she got to wrap her small hand around his forefinger. "Eliza."
"Hello, Eliza," Harris said.
Another silence followed the introductions.
"We just have to-" Joshua said, gesturing vaguely in the opposite direction. Harris nodded and let them go.
It was genuinely a coincidence when Harris arrived at the cash register at about the same time that Joshua and Eliza did. "You first," Harris said automatically. The presence of someone behind them in line, even if that someone didn't stick in her mind very well, made the cashier work faster and not hassle Joshua at all, and he looked grateful for it.
Still, Harris was surprised to find the two of them waiting outside the store. Joshua put Eliza down, but since she still trailed close behind him it didn't exactly give them much more privacy. Joshua said, "What 'are' your intentions?"
"Pardon?"
"Last time we met you said you had no nefarious intentions. So." Joshua cleared his throat. "I was just wondering what your intentions were."
And this was exactly the opportunity Harris had been waiting for, a chance to build something with his charge that would allow him to be a little more active in his life. "I like you," Harris said. He had discovered- rather abruptly, under the circumstances- that it was true.
Joshua snorted. "You barely know me."
"I suppose so," Harris said. "And you, I think, don't particularly like me. I was hoping both of those things might change. But, of course, it's out of my hands."
"Because you ain't stalking me?"
"Exactly so."
"Okay," Joshua said, ducking his head. His lips curved upward and he looked… more pleased than Harris would have expected. Still, the banter- such as it was- came easier than he would have expected, and if it made Joshua smile that would have to do for the time being.
Still, when Harris asked, "May I see you home?" again he fully expected to receive the same response as last time.
"Why the hell not," Joshua said instead.
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CaitlynRaines
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บท 4: It wouldn't be stalking if...
The walk home, in a roundabout way, was how Harris ended up negotiating with Merlin for his second tweak in Joshua's life- if, by tweak, one can also mean an enormous titanic change which despite Merlin's promise that Harris wouldn't have to fight him on these things Harris did actually end up having to fight for tooth and nail.
It happened like this:
When they arrived at Joshua's flat- the images in the file on Joshua didn't really do the miserable place justice- it was peaceful. There was no shouting or crying from within, but for Harris there didn't have to be. Joshua's mother poked her head out and smiled widely, beckoning her son inside and paying very little mind to Harris. Michelle Alcott- as she had been the last time Harris saw her, on the day of her wedding- was much altered. The makeup was thick on her face, but it was her sad, choked aura that really caught Harris's attention. It had been so lovely once, and Harris could see remnants of that long ago love match, broken by a death and what had come after- because she was in a relationship now, too, and it had left parts of her aura all black and withered and wrong. There were patterns to auras that someone who understood them could read like a book, and Harris could see that Michelle's current marriage was a bad one indeed.
Joshua's expression as he caught Harris looking at his mother was complicated- defensive and slightly angry, a little sad and a lot ashamed. He probably thought Harris was taking in just her poorly concealed black eye rather than the entire history of her marriage- fine at first, full of the financial stability she had so desperately needed to raise a young son, and fun enough for her to forget her grief over Joshua's father from time to time, followed by rough patches that only got rougher, always resulting in showers of gifts and good humor that promised a never ending string of new starts, and all the while her aura was wilting, wilting, and getting sicker all the time. Harris made himself look away, focusing briefly on the top of Eliza's blonde head, a beacon of cheerful grey light.
Later, Harris would tell Merlin that Joshua's mother was the one who had needed a cupid, that it would have saved Joshua all the grief he currently suffered if she had never married Carl Anthony Fawcett in the first place. Later, Merlin would remind Harris that he of all people should know that Michelle had had her big love and that her first husband's death and all that came after had placed her out of their division's purview. He would also remind Harris that if they could ask Joshua he would probably willingly go through it all again if it meant keeping Eliza in his life.
That, Harris wouldn't be able to argue with.
In the moment, Harris conjured a smile. "I'll be on my way," he said to Joshua. "Good evening." He gave a final smile to Eliza and moved away from the door. He thought, as he slipped away, that he caught Joshua's shoulders slumping out of the corner of his eye.
It made him want to stay, made him want to never leave Joshua alone ever again, but that simply wasn't feasible.
He had work to do.
~oOo~
"I need you to get rid of the stepfather," Harris informed Merlin when he arrived back at HQ. "Full custody of the child for the mother with minimal fuss, alimony, 'and' he leaves the city- if not the country- and never comes back."
"That's a tall order, Harris," Merlin said slowly.
"Yes. And completely necessary. Joshua is young, he's kind, he's reasonably optimistic given his circumstances. He's just in the right age bracket to be thinking seriously about love, if not permanence, but he is completely grey. He's grey because he can't think about anything but protecting his family and staying alive. Not to mention that his mother's history has probably destroyed what faith in romance he might have ever actually had. So. Since you insist that he will fall in love, and soon, I must do something drastic. I cannot heal those scars by dropping some nice girl in his path. I'm not sure I can heal them at all, but I can't even start unless you help me get him away from that man."
Harris didn't need to talk to Joshua about it to know that he would never leave his mother and sister with Carl, so Harris needed the stepfather to be gone. Immediately and for good.
"Will you get that done that for me?" he asked.
Merlin sighed deeply. "Yes, Harris."
~oOo~
Over the next few weeks London became a very inhospitable place for Carl Fawcett. Harris didn't know or understand what strings Merlin pulled, but everything Harris had requested was put in motion, one thing after another.
Harris didn't try to find Joshua during that time; he thought it best that Joshua have the chance to sort through the changes in his life without Harris looming over his shoulder.
So it was truly a coincidence when Joshua walked into the same coffee shop where Harris was having his morning tea. Well- it wasn't a complete coincidence, because Harris had developed a taste for eating and drinking again because of that first meeting between them, and because Harris had also taken to frequenting places closer to where Joshua lived just to develop a presence in the area for when he would need it later, and because Joshua only had the pocket money to indulge in a coffee now and then because Carl wasn't drinking up everything the family had anymore. It was close enough, though, that Joshua saw real surprise on Harris's face.
"Hey." Joshua approached Harris's table with exaggerated casualness, his hands deep in his pockets. Still, Harris thought he must have imagined it, that Joshua deflated a little when he realized that Harris couldn't possibly have planned the two of them running into each other like this. "I ain't seen you in a while."
"Which might be odder if I had been stalking you," Harris pointed out. "Which- I'll remind you- I was not."
The reference to their last meeting warmed Joshua a little- he snorted out a laugh, at least- but he still looked unsure of himself. Harris pushed the seat across from him out with his foot, giving Joshua an enquiring look. Joshua slouched immediately into the chair. He crossed his arms over his chest, evidently still embarrassed- which, on Joshua, tended to look resentful.
"How are you?" Harris asked instead of remarking on it.
"Okay," Joshua said.
"And Eliza?"
That warmed Joshua a little bit more. He unfolded, sat up straighter, even smiled as he talked about her making a few new friends at the park in their new neighborhood. Apparently, Merlin had added in an additional financial windfall for the family without any bullying from Harris. Harris smiled at the thought.
Joshua's aura still looked entirely grey, but he seemed a great deal easier in himself even if he did still act a little suspicious of Harris. It was odd, how Joshua would seek him out, as if he wanted Harris's attention but felt threatened by it at the same time. Joshua was going to have to get comfortable enough with Harris to let him into his love life a little- when he had one, that was- and the only way Harris knew of to make him so was by being patient, non-threatening, and present for as long as it took. He would find a way to do that. He 'would.'
"I'm glad she's doing well," Harris said, meaning it whole-heartedly, and Joshua seemed to get more relaxed still.
A woman from behind the counter arrived then with Joshua's coffee. Her aura was the grey just tinged with pink that Harris usually associated with someone who had gotten over a bad breakup and was only just beginning to think she could get close to someone again- and right under Harris's eyes she gave Joshua a very speculative look.
"Let me know if you need anything else," she told him with enthusiasm.
Joshua cleared his throat the moment she was gone, faint color lighting his cheeks, and his eyes flicked to Harris several times with uncertainty lighting them.
Perhaps Joshua wanted to talk to her a bit more. The place was empty, and she certainly seemed as though she might enjoy a little flirtation with a good looking young man. She wouldn't register Harris enough to be embarrassed to do so in front of him- but Joshua very well might be. Serendipitously, Harris was also finished with his tea and it was about the time of day he usually checked on one of his other- much simpler- charges, a woman a little older than Joshua- called Mary- who had just become engaged to the woman of her dreams.
Briefly, Harris considered giving the passing interest a little nudge, encouraging it to blossom, but changed his mind. If she and Joshua were a good match it would reveal itself in time, Harris was sure of that much. Best not to rush things so early.
"I'm terribly sorry," Harris said. "But I have to be going." He reached out and touched Joshua's shoulder. He flinched slightly, instinctually, and Harris didn't withdraw, just let his hand rest there lightly until Joshua relaxed underneath it.
Joshua must have read Harris's reaction to his reaction on his face, because he immediately said, "He's gone," and then flushed as it occurred to him that Harris might not have any idea what he was talking about.
Harris smiled and gently rubbed Joshua's arm. "I'm glad."
He let his hand slide lightly down Joshua's forearm toward his elbow, and was startled when Joshua gripped his hand, threading their fingers together, and said, "It wouldn't be so bad, yeah?"
"What?" Harris asked, blinking.
"If… if you was stalking me."
Harris blinked, surprised. Joshua was such a nice boy once you got past the chip on his shoulder. It was difficult to believe that he could be as bad at making friends as Harris was. "But it would be rather less like stalking," Harris pointed out slowly. "If I had permission." Joshua's eyes flickered away from his, focusing on the grain of the table as though it had suddenly become fascinating to him. "But… perhaps if I said that I'd like to see more of you…"
"I'd like that too," Joshua agreed, almost too quickly.
Harris squeezed his hand. "As would I."
Joshua drew his hand away, sharply enough that Harris supposed it had finally occurred to Joshua how the two of them looked. The girl who worked here- she was hovering now behind the counter- was unlikely to think anything of it, but Joshua didn't know that. Harris cleared his throat and gave him some space, tossing his umbrella from hand to hand and backing off.
"Here," Joshua said, quickly again, rushing through the word like he was afraid he'd never get it out otherwise. He held a napkin in his hand, a phone number hastily scribbled across it with a pen Harris hadn't even known Joshua had.
"Thank you," Harris said, mouth dry. He hesitated, then reached out and took the napkin. Their fingers brushed as he did so and Harris kept from shuddering by sheer force of will alone. Joshua, on the other hand, did react. His hand trembled slightly and something in his eyes went soft.
Harris took his time reaching for Joshua, and when he touched Joshua's shoulder that time there was no flinch. Something Harris couldn't identify felt like it was squirming inside the cage of his ribs. He took a breath to calm it and managed to say, "Good day." He squeezed Joshua's shoulder once more and then released him, making his way to the door.
There he paused and glanced behind him. The girl behind the counter- Dianna, her nametag read- was still watching Joshua with a thoughtful gleam in her eye, and Joshua…
Harris thought that just maybe he saw a tiny touch of pink in his aura too.
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CaitlynRaines
CaitlynRaines
Power stones for the June 17-30 Contest please?
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