บท 10: Affirmation
It was then and there she decided to not fall in love easily again.
When she faced Lyndon for the last time, she confessed.
It was late in the afternoon and most of the students and workers have gone home.
They were standing at the little park where they first met.
"What have you called me for?" Lyndon asked her casually.
"Ummm… I.." Misha hesitated for a bit.
"What is it? Is there something wrong?" he asked with urgency and with worry. Lyndon thought that someone might be bothering her again.
"I wanted you to know that I like you..." Misha blurted out. She's so red like a tomato.
She didn't hear him respond. Instead, he laughed at her hardly. His boisterous laughter made anyone who passed them by looked with puzzled faces. After calming himself, he said, "Misha, stop joking. Well, it's the best joke I've ever heard from you! Hahaha!!!"
She can't believe it!
He said that she was just joking. Her face paled and didn't know what to feel at that moment. Her emotions shifted from anger, embarrassment, and nervousness.
She looked at him with her tears verge on falling from her eyes. Lyndon noticed it and stopped from laughing.
"Oy.. You can't be serious right?" he asked with an awkward smile on his face. He began to panic.
"So what if I am?" she retorted. She glared at him feeling hurt.
"You know I have a girlfriend and I can't break up with her." he said while scratching the back of his head. He's so calm telling her about this.
"I know. I just want to tell you." she said while grabbing the ends of her uniform. "So that I can move on." she added. She can't stop her tears anymore. It rolled down on her small face like a mini-river. She was so relieved and at the same time, she was hurt.
Lyndon on the other hand looked away. He stared at the sky that beared some stars. The wind blowed and whistled making Misha shiver. That silence made Misha deaf. She just let her tears fell down and dried up by the wind. At the same time, the silence made the atmosphere awkward. Lyndon broke it.
"I have to go now." he looked at Misha who was still sobbing. She just nodded. Lyndon walked passed through her. "I'm sorry." he uttered and walked away from the scene.
Misha was hurt. So hurt that she couldn't bring herself to smile and move on with her life. She kept making mistakes during her shoots. Her mind was somewhere else. She couldn't bring herself to concentrate that time. She knew that she shouldn't mope around with it and be sad but she couldn't bring herself to. She couldn't help but feel sad and broken. She requested some time off. Her mom readily agreed seeing her daughter in her state.
Misha concentrated in her studies. She burried herself with books and thousand questionaires for her upcoming exam.
One afternoon, she was about to head to the library when she walked passed with some 3rd year students. She overheard them talking about Lyndon. She couldn't help herself to listen to it. That was the time she learned the bitter truth.
"Eh? Lyndon? That patethic jerk was playing all along?" one of the male asked one of his classmates shockingly.
"Yeah! I heard he was one of the thugs in the area. He is also not lame. He just made himself into something like that because of a bet." the other one explained.
"What kind of bet? Did you know?" he asked his classmate.
"It's some kind of make someone fell inlove with him." the other one answered.
As Misha listened more to their conversation, her chest tightened. She gripped her blouse hard. She was shocked all the more she was really hurt. She wanted to scream. She wanted to curse him. Hit him and asked him why he had done that. She trusted him more than a friend. Though he turned her down, she was hoping that at least they could be friends. But learning the truth now, she don't know what to feel. She couldn't believe it. She didn't realized that the books she was holding fell. A loud thud coming from her direction made the upperclassmen turned their heads towards her.
"Isn't she the girl who often hanged out with him?" one of them asked.
"Yeah. She is." the other one answered turned to him and they immediately came to a conclusion.
Misha was on verge of crying.
She didn't want anyone to see her current state thus she ran away from the scene.
She didn't realized that she was at the back of the building, crying. She was shaking with anger.
"I will not forgive you in this lifetime!!" she swore it with vengeance.
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