บท 8: The Chase!
[Ding! System has finished upgrading. System intelligence has increased.]
James woke up to the sound of his uniform system notification. He happily sat up from the bed in excitement. He had a big grin on his face as he quickly checked the system options. "Eh? The three options of Energy, Uniforms, and Upgrades hasn't changed?" James frowned then checked each individual menu. There was nothing new at all! James screamed, "Shitty useless system! What was the fucking point of upgrading your intelligence if nothing new unlocks!?"
[Beep. System intelligence upgrade has allowed for me to be capable of answering questions and holding conversations.]
James froze for a second then laughed happily, "Great! What other new features did the increased system intelligence give?"
[Nothing else. That is all.]
James froze again before complaining, "You're joking right? I spent 100 energy units and that's all you can do!?"
[Correct.]
James screamed, "God damnit all! Useless! Shitty! System! Father, your son has been unfilial. I took 900 gold coins worth of energy and turned it into utter trash! My investments have sunk lower than grandfather's reputation!"
James continued to rant and rave for several minutes before calming down. He spoke aloud, "Okay. It's fine. Just a minor setback. Let's calm down and think." James sat in the lotus position on the bed. He rested his head on his folded hands. He closed his eyes and began to think, "For now I need to focus on a goal. What do I absolutely need to accomplish? Of course. Getting to the BeastWater continent to find the cat-girls! Wait, no. That is a long-term goal. I need short-term goals. I need to learn knight techniques and hopefully magus techniques. The knight book said I need to be at the level of lifting 500 lbs. before being able to train in knight techniques. So, I also need to start working out to absorb mana. What else? I'll need to enter the academy to learn training techniques. They probably won't accept me at my age. The books indicated that most students enter academies between the ages of 10 and 14. I'll need a new uniform. A student uniform. Right! That will be my new goal for now! Hopefully the shitty system can at least answer some questions about energy and uniforms for me."
James opened his eyes and stared at the uniform system display. He spoke, "Oy, shitty system. How do you determine the number of energy units when eating uniforms?
[Number of energy units are based on quality of the devoured uniform. Low-grade uniforms such as your common soldier uniform earn 1 energy unit when eaten. Mid-grade uniforms such as the knight armor are worth 10 energy units when eaten. High-grade uniforms provide 100 energy units when eaten. Any uniforms above that level vary depending on quality.]
James spoke, "So my current soldier uniform is only worth 1 energy unit? Still, if I had managed to scavenge the battlefield where I first woke up I'd have thousands of points. From what I saw at the market all of the gear that makes up a common soldier uniform is worth roughly 10 gold. The librarian told me those suits of armor are worth 100 gold per set. So a single energy unit basically costs 10 gold coins. Jesus that's expensive!" James collected his thoughts for a moment before asking his next question, "How much do uniforms cost to purchase?"
[Low-grade uniforms cost 10 energy units. Mid-grade uniforms cost 100 energy units. High-grade uniforms cost 1000 energy units. Higher level uniforms vary.]
James exclaimed in shock, "You charge ten times as many energy units compared to what you give me for them!? Why should I even bother! It'll be cheaper to just go buy the uniforms normally!"
[Unlike ordinary uniforms I provide a completely new appearance. There is no comparison between the great I and some cheap uniforms only fit as my food. I agree with user James earlier self-assessment. You are truly stupid.]
James yelled, "What the hell! You've got an ego now too? Who are you to insult your master? Do you believe I'll never feed your shitty mouth again!?"
*Bang bang* A knocking sound could be heard from outside the door. The old man that ran the inn yelled, "You okay in there kid? Other guests said they heard someone yelling at them self" James looked at the door in panic before replying, "Sorry about that! Sometimes I sleep talk. I'm up now so it should be fine!" The old man yelled back, "Alright then. Breakfast is in the lobby. If you want to stay another day you need to pay up another silver coin. Otherwise you can scram after breakfast."
James headed down stairs for breakfast. The meal consisted of white bread and some type of fried egg. The egg was as big as a pancake. James happily wolfed down the meal and headed out into the streets. He decided to head for the port to look for part-time work. He thought to himself, "I need a physically exhausting job to build strength first. I also need money for an inn. The academy doesn't start recruiting for nine months. So, I need to reach the minimum threshold for knight training by then. Then I'll create a student uniform and sneak into Sea Salt Academy with the other new students. Right! Let's do it!"
James excitedly rose a fist in the air to pump himself up. "James!!!" All of a sudden James heard a deep voice call his name. He turned around to see Beardy-face staring directly at him. He looked the same as always except that his face was bright red in anger. He was several hundred yards from James. Many people on the street turned to glance at Beardy-face in confusion.
James froze for a second in panic. Cold sweat dripped down his back. He thought to himself, "Right. I should do the sensible thing. I'll kowtow to him begging for forgiveness with tears in my eyes… Fuck that! I'm fucking running!" James turned around and ran like there was a fire under his ass. He darted into a nearby alley. He ran past twists and turns. He could imagine Beardy-face catching up to him. There's no way a Drake Kingdom captain would be weak or slow! James reached the end of the alley way. He spoke, "It's now or never!" James hurriedly opened the system by rubbing his eyes. He unequipped the Drake Kingdom common soldier uniform. James could feel his height shrink back to 70 inches. His face lost its scars and returned to normal. His hair turned from red to black. His tan skin returned to a pasty white color.
James laughed aloud, "Haha! What now Beardy-face! There's no way you'll recognize me! Ah, I'm finally back to my beautiful handsome self." James confidently walked out of the alleyway. He noticed several people staring at him. He chuckled conceitedly, "Haha, I bet the people in this world aren't used to seeing someone as handsome as me. They're all staring. Heh, look at that girl looking directly at my eyes. She must like my dark green eyes!" James ran his hands through his hair to act cool and winked at her. The woman blushed.
James continued walking down the street as everyone stared at him. Suddenly he saw Lumi! She stopped in the middle of the street and stared at James with wide eyes! James felt cold sweat drip down his back. He muttered to himself, "There's no way she recognizes me, right? I look completely different!" James glanced back and saw that Beardy-face had ran out of the alleyway as well. Captain Beardy stared at James in pure shock. James started to get scared. "Fuck. I got caught? How? Why? It makes no sense? What do I do?!"
James continued walking as if everything was normal. It wasn't just Lumi and Beardy-face staring at him. Everyone else was. James saw a mother and daughter on one side of the street. The daughter appeared to be five or six years old. Suddenly the little girl pulled on her mother's dress and spoke, "Mommy! Why is that thin man naked?" The mother covered her daughter's eyes and hushed her, "Shh. Don't bother the crazy man."
James heard the girl and looked around in confusion. There was nobody naked outside? Only people staring at James? "Wait a minute…" James slowly glanced down in fear. He saw his little private enjoying the breeze. James was almost completely naked! The only thing he had on was a pair of dress socks and dress shoes! James screamed in embarrassment, "Gahhh!!!" He hurriedly covered up his privates with his hands as best he could. Then he dashed into the nearest alleyway!
Beardy-face walked over to Lumi and spoke, "What the hell was that about?" Lumi shook her head and responded, "I don't know, but I'm going to catch that pervert. James can wait until later, but I can't allow a nudist pervert to degrade our kingdoms honor. It insults the dignity of the Elder Dragon!" Lumi ran off towards the alleyway James had ran into.
James continued to run through the alleyways in panic. He yelled aloud, "Shitty system! Why in the holy fuck am I naked?!"
[When host first entered this world the mid-quality suit you were wearing was automatically devoured for system initiation. 10 energy units were provided as compensation. You used these energy units to purchase the Drake Kingdom common soldier uniform.]
James looked like a madman running down the dark alleys with his two hands covering his privates. He screamed, "Shitty system! Are you a rapist? Have you never heard of consent laws?! Anyways, why did you leave my socks and shoes?! If you ate those too then I might have at least noticed!"
[Socks and shoes were not part of the uniform. They were a different brand and of inferior quality.]
James was currently running down a particularly long alleyway. He glanced behind him and saw Lumi rapidly catching up! "Damn, damn, damn! I can't equip the soldier uniform with Lumi chasing me! She'd definitely kill me! Oy! System! Let me wear the soldier uniform without changing my appearance into the ugly brute!"
[Negative. That functionality is not available.]
"Why the hell not?!?! That doesn't even make sense!"
[Checking for reason. One moment. Reason located. Classified. User is not eligible for classified information until predetermined strength requirements are met.]
"Oh, what the hell! How strong do I need to be before you tell me then?"
[Checking. Requirements located. This information is also classified.]
"God! Fucking! Damnit! I liked you better when you couldn't speak!"
James continued to zig-zag through alleyways. Lumi was getting closer. He finally reached the end of an alleyway. Shockingly the sea was straight below him! James could see the waves beneath him. It was about a 50-foot drop.
Lumi turned the corner and saw James. She yelled, "Stay right there!" James hesitated for a moment. He thought to himself, "I can't let myself be caught here! Who knows what the crazy dragon-horn lady will do! I'm going to jump!"
There was a short ledge in front of James. He hurriedly climbed atop it. He stared down at the sea and gulped. "I should at-least say something witty before jumping!" James turned to face Lumi who was rushing towards him. He spread his legs apart and lifted his arms into the air as if he was going to embrace her. James laughed aloud, "Remember this Lumi! This was the day you almost caught James Da-." James stopped mid-sentence and thought to himself, "Ah, fuck. Almost said my real name. That was stupid!"
James coughed in one hand awkwardly, "Ahem!" He then resumed his pose. Legs wide open. Arms in the air. His pose expressed the extreme confidence that could only come to someone who had temporarily forgotten that they are currently completely nude. He laughed aloud, "Remember this Lumi! This was the day you almost caught James Sparrow! Bwhahaha!" With that sentence said James fell backwards towards the ocean with a big grin on his face.
*Splash!* Lumi heard a big splash and ran over in shock. She leaned over the edge and saw James surface from the water and start to swim away. She frowned, "Should I chase him? There's no way a fall like that would hurt me." Lumi slowly shook her head. "It's not worth my effort and time chasing that bastard through the seas." Lumi turned around and headed back the way she came.
James swam through the sea to the port. He found steps leading out of the sea and followed them up. He laughed aloud, "Haha, I'm a genius. James, master of escape! Even with my weak body I escaped the pursuit of an entire kingdom!" James posed dramatically, "Not even the Drake Kingdom can hold a candle to me. I'll escape as many as they send! Run from all foes! Hide in the shadows while they work in the light! Bwhahaha!"
James heard some footsteps. A dock worker turned a corner and saw him standing there naked laughing. The dock worker had a surprised wide-eyed look on his face. He was carrying a heavy looking box. The man stared for a second then slowly started walking backwards around the corner. He yelled out, "I didn't see nothing kid. I don't want no trouble!"
James blushed in embarrassment. He hurriedly opened the system. And equipped the Drake Kingdom common soldier uniform. His height grew slightly, his hair turned red, his skin darkened, and his face became covered in scars. A soldier uniform that was black and red automatically appeared on his body along with some heavy iron chainmail armor. James then hurriedly exited the dock. He sighed, "I guess I need to go find some clothes for my normal appearance now."
Back in the center of Sea Salt City. Lumi and Beardy-face were walking side-by-side. Lumi appeared to be lost in thought. Captain Beardy spoke, "What's the matter Lumi? Just a crazy guy that got away. Ain't worth worrying about if you ask me."
Lumi shook her head in disagreement. She spoke, "That man knew my name, but I'm certain I never said it before. In fact, he even said my name twice. He even told me his name. I've never met a James Sparrow before. The only James I know is the James Dawn we're chasing."
Captain Beardy laughed, "It's probably a coincidence. Although James is a rare name there are still plenty of the people in the world with it."
Lumi was about to nod in agreement when she realized something. She spoke excitedly, "James Dawn! He was originally going to say his name was James Dawn! He stopped partway through his sentence! I don't know how but that pervert has got to be James Dawn! I'm sure of it!"
Captain Beardy gave her a funny look, "How can a man change that drastically? It makes no sense. I think you've just become obsessed with finding him and you're reaching for straws."
Lumi insisted, "No! I'm sure of it. Remember when you were chasing him in the alleyways? The naked James Sparrow exited right before you did! From the same exact place! It makes perfect sense! The only question now is how he did it. Is he a magus mutate? No that can't be it. He just entered the Magus Plane. Perhaps people from his plane naturally possess the ability to shapeshift? I'm definitely going to arrest him and find out! First, he stole my dress and spied on me bathing! Now he ran stark-naked through the streets! I won't rest until I apprehend him for the good of the Drake Kingdom!"
Beardy-face shook his head in disbelief. He wasn't sure if Lumi was right or not, but he didn't think it was worth the effort either way. He sighed, "Oh well. Gotta follow orders. Might as well try to get my flask back while we're at it I suppose."
Lumi and Beardy-face started heading for the docks. Lumi was so excited she was rushing. She chuckled aloud, "I'll catch that bastard and throw him in prison until he rots. Hahaha!" Beardy-face just continued to follow along quietly. He always believed himself to be a wise man and so he decided it was better not to argue with a crazy woman.
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SnoozySloth
SnoozySloth This chapter was super fun to write. I've had the nude idea for when he first returns to his original appearance since chapter 1! I didn't think it would take me this long to introduce the idea haha!
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