บท 36: IF YOU DON'T LIKE BEACH EPISODES WITH FANSERVICE, SKIP THIS
IF YOU DON'T LIKE BEACH EPISODES WITH FANSERVICE, SKIP THIS
I don't know what to feel about this beach episode.
Neutral news, I'm the only thorn among the roses. Good news, I'm surrounded by beautiful girls. Bad news, they are all my friends.
I feel like I've been left out in this paradise. If only I have a male friend here whom I can talk and relate to…
It's seven in the morning, and the beach is still much unoccupied. I've finished changing, and I have this shorts which were handpicked by Tiara and bought by Amy in the market last night. Platinum white with a huge flame decals. I was shocked at how Tiara got my taste in my own wear.
Oh, I am also topless, so it reveals my medium built body with fairly visible abs. I've been the apple of the eye of some bikini girls who are just passing by.
I was sitting under an umbrella, on this white sand. I'm watching every girl who goes out of the changing room. Sure those girls take a lot of time. Now I look like a creeper.
After fifteen whole minutes, they finally revealed themselves.
"H-How do we look?" Amy said.
Amy is wearing a black matching two-piece with golden stripes. The golden linings sparkle every time she moves, probably because of reflection from the sun. She abandoned the ribbons, and instead, she has this princess braided hair to add up to her cuteness. She's also wearing sandals that have heels to add height.
"U-Um… Is it really okay for me to wear this?" Tiara is shyly covering her cleavage by her arms.
Tiara is wearing white two pieces with red lining on the edges, which emphasize her almost perfect measurements and snow white skin. She got the largest boobs and thickest booty out of my friends here. It's the first time I've seen her long black hair tied in a ponytail by an adorable orange ribbon, so I was dazzled. Add her cute rosy cheeks to that, and it's an all-in-one package!
"D-D-Don't tell Heushac about this." Helena, through extreme circumstances, showed her embarrassed side.
Helena is wearing a pink tube with frills, and jean shorts that emphasize her long legs. She's wearing a straw hat that has a lot of accessories such as butterflies, stars, bow, and other sparkly things. This is far from the tomboyish Helena I know. Heushac will kill me just for staring at her.
"Hey, don't forget our newest member!" Amy said.
Then she fetched the white-haired thirteen-year-old artificial human. I think her name is Key, which is an experimental Gate Guardian. Her cute face is emotionless like a doll, the same as when we got her this morning. By the way, she's wearing a blue school swimming uniform. She got the whitest complexion over here.
If I'm going to rate the girls, I'll go 10/10 for Tiara. Next will be a tie between Helena and Amy for the score of 8/10.
I don't want to rate an underaged girl, so I didn't include Key on my imaginary contest. Why? I don't want to go to jail! I don't have a thing for illegal lolis! I'm not like those perverted people who are currently reading this story, duh.
I suddenly noticed that Tiara's face has been red for a while now. I went in front of her, caressed her hair and then slide my palms on her forehead. She's quite warm, but not enough to be considered a fever.
"Are you okay?" I asked. "Your face looks redder than normal."
"R-R-Rikkun's naked body…" She muttered like a possessed woman, with a straight wide gaze. Steam came out from her ears.
"Huh?" I said as I scratched my forehead.
Suddenly, she groveled down with her face sticking on the white sand.
"I'm s-s-sorry, I'm so sorry R-Rikkun! I-I-I was fantasizing about your naked body! I'm so sorry! It won't happen again! I'm such a bad girl! Please forgive me! Please don't stop talking to me! Please don't revoke our friendship!"
Well I quite fancy her too. It's mutual. So it's fine.
<>
We started playing beach ball in this stomach-high sea level of salty water. Actually, this kind of game is boring and childish, but the girls seemed to enjoy it. I got my passion for playing this game because every time they raise their hands, a pair of boobs would bounce. Especially Tiara's. Mirror mirror in the water, she's got bounciest of them all.
I wanted a change of the game, so I surprised the Japanese girl with a splash! She shrieked with a cute "Kya!" but she smiled as if she enjoyed getting wet. Then Helena joined in and it became a waterbending tournament.
I am trained to handle these kinds of situations. I can hide my blushing face or conceal my drool for woman's treasures, have a poker face and yet still have dirty thoughts. I know I'm a woman-hater, but boobs and butts deserves to be loved.
Oh, a side note for you all lady cupcakes out there. All men are perverts. They won't be straight if they're not dirty inside. They all watch arousing materials and satisfy their own selves. So if you happen to know a male friend that didn't like any of the things mentioned in this paragraph, then that man is a special kind of freak!
Anyway, I noticed that Amy has been staring at Tiara's boobs more than me. I can feel the intense envy of that blonde kitty. It's worrying me that she might be possessed by an Eidolon or something. But then I realized that it was her usual self when she turned to me and looked at me aggressively.
"Hey, Ric! Go fetch that girl." Amy pointed at the shore.
I forgot to tell you that the real-life doll named Key is antisocial. Instead of playing with us, she just sat under an umbrella and played games on her tablet.
I went to her like what our 'goddess' wanted me to do. It was a troublesome job to land back to the shore with this heavily soaked shorts.
"Hey, girl." I made the most adorable smile I had in my arsenal. I swear I'm sparkling like a teenage vampire. "Let's go play together~"
Key stood up and went slowly to me. As I turned away, I heard a powerful smack and felt an excruciating pain! She hit me! She hit me! She hit my Johnny! It was so heartbreaking that one nut-breaking kick would make me fall unto my knees and kiss the sand.
"Rikkun!" The bouncy breast shrine maiden came to the rescue! "W-What grudge did she have in your scrotum!?"
Helena went to that damned homunculus doll and patted her head as if she was a good girl. "There, there~ Let's just stay away from that arrogant man and play together."
Key answered with a nod, with the very same facial expression. Is she a mute robot?
Anyway, Helena is so great at handling children. She should have adapted that skill from the orphanage where she and Heushac came from. Maybe we will have that tomboy in charge in taking care of that artificial human.
Tiara surprised me when she revealed her right hand which was glowing green!
"R-Rikkun… Bend over and I'll use <Healing Touch>"
"Stop!" I shrieked as I parried her hand just before she could touch my nuts! "I-Ice therapy should do it! I'll go buy some!"
<>
We left Helena and Key alone to play in the middle of the beach while Tiara and Amy accompanied me. We three bought an ice cream and we are walking back to our place when something troubled my mind.
The Outsider said that the next <Presage> will come and there should be a doomed ending for me. Does that mean someone is going to die again? Or was it me, who will be the next victim?
"Hey." Amy elbowed me softly. "You've been staring at her butt for quite a while now. You really are attracted to Tiara's childbearing hips, aren't you?"
I just realized that whenever my mind flies off from reality, my eyes were magnetized by those bouncing things. It's Tiara's fault. Nobody told her to walk in front of us.
"E-EH!!!" Tiara cried as she covered her back. Her face is completely flustered. "P-Please refrain from doing that, Rikkun!"
I looked away, trying to hide my face. I can't resist the blood in my cheeks anymore. But Jeannette is here to make this atmosphere more unreadable.
"Wefwain from doing that, Rikkun!" Amy started mimicking Tiara's lines in a pissed manner. "Can't you be more annoying? Rikkun here, Rikkun there! Yes Rikkun. Of course Rikkun. Can I kiss your ass, Rikkun? SO FREAKING ANNOYING!!!"
"Auuuu…" Tiara bowed and cried. Hey, stop bullying Tiara!
Suddenly, Amy made a detour. She's heading to the changing room, and I can feel a dark presence on her aura. I know she's eternally pissed. Did I do something wrong?
There was a blinding flash that came from that girl's changing room. And what came out next is not the Amy I know.
A six-footer woman with gargantuan breast, thin waist, and chunky butt. It was Amy's Goddess form, Lord Freya! That idiot used her power just to gain tremendous appeal! Now her bikini looks undersized, as it was barely holding her chest. I think her bra is about to explode…
"All hail the Goddess of Beauty, Love, War, and Death!" She shouted. Because of her passive ability which gives her overwhelming appeal and charisma, all the guys on this beach had their eyes on her. She looks like a pornstar.
"You're overdoing it." I had my sweat run through my face.
"Now, shall you accept the honor for applying a lotion on my skin?" The goddess winked.
She's now the Goddess of Moody.
<>
Oh, the ratings have been altered. Lord Freya wins with the score of Infinity/10 since she has a never-ending charm thanks to her Goddess Ability.
Right now, Tiara and Amy...err I mean Goddess Freya her royal highness is laying on their belly with a mat underneath. I am forced to put sunscreen lotion on their backs because it is already ten and the sunlight already stings. They sure want to start sunbathing as soon as possible.
I had to unhook Freya's tight bra first before massaging her back with a lotion. I was surprised that the bikini was never ripped by those watermelons. Her skin is so silky and smooth under my palms, and adding the lotion, it made it slippery and slimy.
"Your messages really are the best, Ric." Freya satisfyingly said. Back when we are still in junior high, I would be her personal massage slave because of my gentle touch.
After I finished, I hooked her bra without any problems… Probably...
Now, it's Tiara's turn. Before I removed the hook, she babbled more nonsense.
"U-Um… Rikkun…. Please be gentle… I-It's my first time."
"Stop saying weird contexts." I coldly protested as I covered my hands with the white plasma. "Here I go."
She made a cute cry when I put my hands on her back. Tiara's skin is so fair and flawless, as it was on par with our goddess of beauty. She seemed ticklish maybe because it's her first time getting her back caressed by a rough hand of a guy. After a few seconds, she seemed to enjoy it and it made her relaxed. She even fell asleep after a couple of minutes.
When I finished the massage therapy, I closed the umbrella for them to enjoy the sun. I relaxed on my beach bed and sipped on my ice cold lemonade as I enjoyed the view of the horizon where the sea and the sky meet.
But then I heard a sudden snap! It was so loud that it made Tiara wake up by surprise. I looked around and saw the pissed off goddess staring angrily at me.
"Ric you dumb nerd!" She shouted. The strap of her bra has just been ripped!
"It's not my fault! You transformed into that form knowing that the tiny bra will never fit on you!" I said coldly.
"I-I'll do it, Nette-Senpai!" Tiara raised her body and tried to fix the broken swimsuit.
Never did Tiara realize that I 'forgot' to hook her bra when I finished massaging her, so she went on topless. But I was just there, dumbfounded.
Freya saw what I'm about to see, so she warned Tiara! "Wait, your bra fell off!" She said. Then she instinctively raised her body to cover the shrine maiden's defenseless chest. But the goddess's chest also has no cover for protection.
Alas! Their long hairs are obstructing the glamorous view of the mountains! I won't get unluckier than this!
"Eeeeeeek!" , "You perverted nerd!" Amy and Tiara shouted respectively, as they both landed a kick and a punch on my already bleeding nose!
And that ended the beach fanservice. I spent the rest of the day in the Black Cross Mansion Infirmary, beside that playboy Kristoff.
10/10 Best Day of my life. NOT.
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